If there was one thing that Legolas was used to, it was being stared at. He'd spent a good part of his life sitting in the court of Mirkwood while a seemingly endless parade of troubadours milled through to see if the rumors of his beauty were true. That, unpleasant and obnoxious as it had been, was good practice for his life in Gondor where he was both one of the few elves any of these Men had ever seen and married to the king. A lifetime of being gawked at left him well prepared to handle himself under great scrutiny during his less-than-stellar moments. However, never before had he been sitting on a bed in the Houses of Healing wrapped in a blanket to conceal the fact that the lower half of his body was completely naked.
He knew that he shouldn't feel so uncomfortable in this situation. After all, hadn't he just that morning flown out of bed completely nude in the presence of a guard? Elves in general weren't shy about their bodies and he was no exception. But this was different; now he was the only one in a semi-nude state in a room with Aragorn, Elladan, Elrohir, Ioreth, and a long-winded, pretentious healer who'd insisted on being present during his examination. The reason why he was in such a state of undress made him feel all the more vulnerable. Legolas groaned inwardly; he never thought about this aspect of pregnancy before.
"Legolas," said Elrohir with as much patience as he could muster. He could understand the prince's reluctance, but this was getting ridiculous! If Legolas delayed the examination any longer he and his brother wouldn't be able to set out at all that day, which would waste precious time that frankly no one in that room could afford to lose. "We need you to lie back and loosen up that blanket a little."
"I don't see why I should have to," Legolas insisted stubbornly, although that wasn't entirely true. It was more like he didn't want to have to. "Or why so many people have to be here when I do it."
Elrohir didn't bother to conceal his frustrated sigh. He should have known that something like this would happen. Legolas inherited a healthy dose of his father's stubbornness and honed it well while growing up under the threat of the shadow and the unwanted attentions of others. To make matters worse, the current situation was awkward at best especially when the elf prince's limited experience as a patient was taking into consideration. Of course he didn't want to do it. "Legolas, please don't fight us on this," he begged. "We won't be able to see that you're taken care of properly unless you consent to this examination."
"How is letting everyone in this room stare at my genitals necessary to ensuring my health or the health of my son?" demanded Legolas.
"This is ridiculous." Elladan threw his hands up in the air and fixed a determined stare on his friend. "First of all, we'renot looking at your genitals; they just happen to bein the general vicinity of where we need to look.And three out of five people in this room besides you have already seen them anyway. In fact, Elrohir and I saw them just a few years ago."
That caught Aragorn's attention. "When?" he wanted to know.
"Before the Fellowship of the Ring set out from Rivendell. Just because it was improper for you two to bathe together didn't mean that the three of us couldn't. Now don't interrupt unless you're trying to help," Elladan scolded his brother before returning to the matter-at-hand. "As you very well know, that baby has to exit your body from somewhere."
"True," Legolas conceded.
"And no one is exactly sure how that's supposed to happen."
"Hence the reason why you two are leaving," Legolas told him firmly, squaring his jaw. "I don't know what you expect to find out from this particular examination."
"Perhaps we could see if any, um, changes have taken place in that region of your body," jumped in Elrohir. "It might provide us with invaluable information that would assist in our research."
"There have been no changes!" replied Legolas irritably. "If you don't trust my own knowledge of my own body, ask Aragorn. He should have a better knowledge of that subject than the rest of you combined. Tell them, Aragorn."
Five sets of expectant eyes went to him at once, making the Man extremely nervous. "Well, er, I didn't see anything new, but I wasn't exactly looking," he croaked out. Seeing his husband's eyes storm over, he gulped and quickly added, "But I'm sure I would have noticed if something in that, ah, area changed dramatically."
Elrohir shot him a withering look that made it clear that the elf lord didn't know what it was like to contend with a pregnant Legolas' temper. "Mellon nin," he said with barely controlled impatience. "This examination will take up very little of your time. It will not injure any part of you except perhaps your pride. It can, however, provide Elladan and I with a starting point for research that will help us assist you when it comes time to deliver. Now tell me, Greenleaf, what is more important to you: your pride of the well being of your son?"
"Your father used to call me Greenleaf," mumbled Legolas, not looking Elrohir in the eye.
"And would my father have asked you to do something like this unless he deemed it completely necessary?"
"Fine!" Legolas relented with a snap and rolled over onto his back. He parted his knees, put them in the air and bent his legs back as far as they would go. After positioning the blanket so that no one who opened the door would be able to fully partake in his humiliation he groused,"Just get it over with."
The twins, Ioreth, the healer, and even Aragorn moved swiftly to see what secrets the view would reveal. "I don't see anything," the healer finally stated.
Elladan ignored the frustrated groan from the other end of the bed and began a more thorough investigation. "I'm afraid I must concur," he reported in a clipped tone. "I can't feel any creases of crevices that would indicate that a birth canal was starting to form. Nor can I feel anything in the bone structure that seems to be shifting; at least not yet."
"Then would you mind removing your hand?" was Legolas' dark response.
"What makes you so certain that his body will create a birth passage?" asked Ioreth, curious rather than challenging in her question. This was without a doubt the most fascinating case she'dencountered in the Houses of Healing since…the prince's last visit. "I've attended some birthings where the mother had to be cut 'round the belly area to get the baby out safe and sound."
Aragorn shuddered at the thought and grabbed his husband's hand. A cranky Legolas yanked it away. "That is certainly a possibility," answered Elladan as he repressed a smile at the couple's silent exchange. Somehow he doubted that Aragorn and Legolas would see the humor in itat the moment. "However, my brothers and I have heard many accounts of male elves that gave birth and the apparent swiftness of their recoveries suggest that a more natural birth took place."
"But I thought elves were fast healers," Ioreth sounded confused.
"They are," Elladan assured her. "But male elves loose some of that ability during pregnancy. Even if that weren't the case, any elf would need some time to recover from the procedure that you're describing."
Legolas was getting an enormous headache. First his father and Gloin almost had a brawl in the courtyard of the citadel, stopping onlywhen he'd vomited in front of them all. Then he had to expose himself to the careful scrutiny of his brothers-in-law and two virtual strangers. Now he had to listen to them discussing his body and all the possible ways it could come open. What next?
He didn't have to wait long for the answer to that question. "I beg your pardon for interrupting," said the healer to Elladan, "but if we cannot figure out how the birth will take place at the moment, I believe we should address other issues."
Anything to steer the conversation away from all this talk of cutting! "Such as?" encouraged Aragorn, hoping that his desperation didn't sound as obvious to the others as it did to him.
"Such as the matter of the prince's weight."
"What about my weight?" Legolas demanded with a touch of frost in his tone.
"As a healer I must be frank. You are noticeably underweight for someone as far along as five to six months," explained the healer as if he were speaking to a two-year-old. Aragorn, fearing a disaster, positioned himself between the Man and his husband. "That could have serious repercussions for the child."
He couldn't take much more of this! Legolas knew how to deal with political maneuvering and court life; he was at a loss as to how he should respond to a series of well-meaning but emotionally upsetting healer consultations. "I've gained weight," he stated, his voice straining under all the self-control. "That was the first thing that both Ada and Gimli noticed when we returned."
"Yet you still aren't at the weight that is normal among the Gondorian nobles this far along."
"Those are mortals whose most strenuous activity is gossiping. I'm an elf who's just journeyed several leagues on foot and horseback."
The healer stood firm. "Prince Legolas, you are only hurting the baby by refusing to put on the weight."
Aragorn opened his mouth in outrage but Legolas beat him to the retort. "How dare you?!" he seethed, trying desperately to hold his tears at bay. Ai, Elbereth, he couldn't stand not being in control of his emotions. "I would never hurt my baby! There is no one in this city – in Middle-earth – that wants this child to be healthy more than I do." He ducked his head as the tears began to spill. "I'm – I'm not – doing – doing it on purpose…"
"Get out." Aragorn's command rang out loud and firm as he sat down next to the almost hyperventilating elf.
"Sire –"
Aragorn waved his hand in the healer's direction, warning him that silence would be his best course of action at the moment. "Elladan, Elrohir, we'll meet you at the gates before you depart, but right now none of you can do anything more that can be construed as 'healing.' Leave."
He didn't even bother to watch them shuffle out. Instead, he wrapped his arms around his husband and was relieved when he didn't jerk away. "Please melanin, breathe," he coaxed gently while rubbing his back.
"Of course I should breathe. I'll hurt the baby if I don't breathe," shot back Legolas with bitter self-loathing. "Just like I'm harming him by selfishly keeping the weight off and getting upset when people start making good-intentioned accusations. Because of me our child will be scrawny, sickly, and probably die before his first birthday." He froze suddenly and then crumbled against his husband. "Ai, Elbereth, how could I even think such an awful thing, let alone say it? What's wrong with me, Aragorn?"
"You're pregnant," Aragorn told him simply. "No one quite understands what's going on or what to expect, but because you're a public figure and this is the heir to the throne of Gondor they all feel like they have the privilege to give you their opinions. While you could handle that under normal circumstances, pregnancy is doing extreme things to your emotions. It's nothing to be embarrassed or concerned about."
"How am I supposed to put up with all of this without losing my mind?" Legolas wiped his eyes in annoyance. "Ai, I don't want to give Cirion and his cronies the satisfaction of knowing that I've been crying."
Aragorn pulled him even closer. "The advisors' council can wait until we're good and ready to show up," he reassured him.
"My love, I know that they can be insufferable at time but we should try to cooperate with them," replied Legolas miserably. "Not all of them are so terrible and they're important to Gondor's political stability. I'm strong enough to deal with them."
"There is nothing more important right now than you," insisted Aragorn. "And you don't need to be strong enough all the time. Remember our conversation the last time you were in the Houses of Healing? That still holds; I'm asking you to let me be strong for you."
"I love you, Aragorn. Please remember that when I'm being so mean," Legolas managed to smile. "I didn't think about all of these difficult trials when I fantasized about having a child."
"Dreams don't always prepare you for the reality of a situation," the Man murmured fondly. "You told me something like that in Bree after I got all sweaty and hot in my clothes one memorable evening."
"Aragorn," said Legolas tiredly, though Aragorn could still hear the amusement in his voice. "Don't compare our lovemaking to this."
Pressing a kiss into the top of his head, Aragorn replied warmly, "I'm sorry; it will never happen again."
To be continued…
A/N: I have a presenation and a take-home exam and then I'm done with school until the first week in January!!!! Plot bunnies, here I come.
Can anyone out there tell me how I can complain to about the stupid editing function screw-ups? I swear Irun spell check and comb through every chapter looking for improperly-linked words and still there are mistakes that weren't there before in the final product. It's driving me insane and I'd like to do something to remedy it.