Title: Babylon Blues
Author: Seshiro Sakurazuka
Chapter: Sakura Blues
Warnings: SPOILERS, blood, death, shonen-ai, angst, sap
Disclaimer: Tokyo Babylon/X/1999 do not belong to the author or any of the author's associates. Tokyo Babylon/X/1999 belongs to CLAMP and their affiliates.
He settled his mental debate, and decided to sleep off these warm fuzzies. In the morning, he would go to Subaru and set this mess to rights, most likely with the edge of a knife.
The sun rose, like every day before it since the dawn of earth. Shafts of light streamed into the Sakurazukamori's bedroom, raping the shadows he had carefully cultivated, and sending them to sulk in the corner. Nothing seemed to indicate that a man was planning to murder someone in a hospital. Really, it was a lovely morning, all in all. Except in the mind of Sakurazuka, of the Sakurazukamori clan. This day seemed even grayer than the last. He knew what needed to be done with Subaru, and exactly how to do it. He pretended that this was nothing for him, just a routine killing, but by the tightness around his eyes, he was less than thrilled by the idea.
'Why?' He asked himself. 'Why don't I want to do this?' But he had no answers. No one could answer that but the dead, and the dead didn't seem that talkative at the moment. Studiously, he kept his mind off his victim by deciding how to get by the wards. Knowing Obaa-chan Sumeragi, there were likely to be a lot of nasty ones. The scenarios played themselves out in his mind, as the sunbeams silently chased their quarry up the walls.
The room was still, silent as the grave, only the sun's path lighting the room as an indicator that Sakurazuka lived inside time like the rest of the human race. He sat with a corpse's stillness and a cat's grace in his favorite chair. It was plush and red, with black arm rests and one long black leg branching off into four wheels. He had gotten it for two reasons. One, the red was of such a shade that blood didn't stain it easily, and two, he secretly enjoyed the fun of pushing himself around the room. Not that he, the fearsome Sakurazukamori would ever tell anyone that he liked something as childish as wheelie chairs, but everyone has their own little kid inside. Suddenly, he stood, breaking the tranquillity of the room into a thousand tiny shards that mirrored each other, returning the room to perfect stillness as one shard reflected into the next.
It was ten o'clock when the hospital warden admitted Sakurazuka Seshiro in to the privet room of Sumeragi Subaru. The man had sacrificed one of his eyes for the boy, so there was no issue of animosity between them. Or so thought the warden. He had been under strict orders not to let anyone into Subaru's room. But what harm could there be in letting the boy's lover in to see him? Last he saw, they were so deep into each other you could have beheaded a chicken in their faces. Again, though, that might be the romance novels talking. Heaving a shrug into the already busy room, he picked up one of the scattered paper back books from behind his desk and started reading, lost in the plot and dead to the world.
Seshiro entered the Sumeragi room silently. There was no need to wake the boy up if he could kill him without it. Chills ran down his back as he approached the bed, knife drawn. It should be so simple, but there was something holding him back. It was the same little thing that tickled his mind when he thought of Subaru-kun. Looking down on the peaceful face, he found himself brushing strands of hair out of his soon-to-be-victim's eyes with the tip of the knife. That disturbed him more than anything else that happened so far did. Why should he care if Subaru-kun had hair in his eyes when he died? Then the knife trailed down in an attempt to carry out its mission. Sakurazuka's hand had taken on a life of it's own, and was now tracing the younger boy's lips with the tip of the blade so lightly that if you didn't see it, you wouldn't know it was there. While there was little artistry in killing with the point of a blade, Sakurazukamori knew that it would be the quickest and easiest way to do the job. For some reason today, he needed this to be quick and painless. With his free hand, he jerked the wandering blade away from the loving boy. And he was loving. Every one he passed on the street, he gave detached affection for. Something he could never figure out. His arms poised above his head, he waited a few moments, aiming for the heart. It wouldn't be right to stab him anywhere else.
Subaru opened his eyes for the first time that morning, not remembering much of what was going on. The bright light warned him that he had been out for longer than he anticipated, but the shining light above him required his immediate attention. Looking up, his warm chocolate eyes met the hard brown of his once beloved Seshiro. The older man looked startled, something that you didn't see on the face of the Sakurazukamori often. Standing in the white, sunlit room, Sakurazuka felt silly. Here they were in a hospital, in broad daylight, and he stood there holding a knife over the man he…hated? Was going to kill? Something wasn't right. He didn't want anything to do with the knife, the death, that was there, curled like a snake in the corner. Neither knew what to say, what to do. Really, what can you do when faced with such an impossible situation?
The silence was broken by the young boy throwing himself acrossed the room in rage. Though his words were indistinct, muffled by feral growls and hidden between sobs of rage, their meaning was clear enough. His fists hit the Sakurazukamori's chest over and over, and the older man wrapped him in his arms without thinking. He knew what must be done now. Just seeing the boy again had proven that he really did love. But, why? How? Nothing made sense any more. Soon, Subaru collapsed in Seshiro's arms, weeping for all that he was worth. In his mind, nothing was the same. Both men looked up at the same time, catching each other's eyes, and shocking both. How did they get to this? Enemies crying in the other's arms. For Seshiro, too, had tears on his cheeks, though no one knew how they got there. Straightening himself, Seshiro turned to leave with a neon red blush painted on his cheeks. He had been in more compromising situations with the boy, so why the embarrassment?
Subaru picked up the knife Seshiro had dropped, handing it to the Sakurazukamori's back. He was a smart boy, knowing that he was supposed to be dead right now, but death seemed like a good idea at the moment. Everything in the world that had been dear to him was lost. His sister, who always took time to be polite to him, who never took him for granted, was dead. The man who was supposed to love him, and who he just might love back, wanted him dead. Even his Obaa-chan had sacrificed the use of her legs for him. She wouldn't walk for the rest of her life, and it was his fault. A hard lump formed in his throat.
"Aren't you going to finish the job? Or are you so sadistic that you'd let me live?" Subaru said, as Seshiro still hadn't turned around. The broad shoulders of the man shook a bit, and he turned around.
"Why don't you kill me?" He asked, kneeling before his…love. As much as he hated to admit it, he loved Subaru. Subaru, himself, didn't know why he didn't just stab the man in the back, other than the fact that he didn't like killing. They stood there for a long time, just looking at each other, waiting for someone to make a move. In the end, though, it was neither Seshiro nor Subaru who broke the silence.
"Subaru!" Shouted a wrinkled figure from the door, pushing her wheelchair as fast as it could go. Seshiro jumped as if burned, and ran for the door. The charm cards that should have kept any magic users out, other than a Sumeragi, didn't so much as flash as he passed.
A/N: A little aid for those of you who do not speak the Americanized Japanese.
chan – a suffix added to the end of a name to indicate friendship.
jo – A suffix used to indicate a girl of high standing, as in the English miss.
kun – a suffix added to the end of a name to indicate friendship, usually used by girls referring to boys.
O- - A prefix used for someone older than yourself to show respect for that person
Obaa-san – O-, the prefix for someone of a higher station than you, baa, the word meaning grandmother, and –san, the suffix used as a term of respect.
Sakura – Cherry blossoms, specifically the tree that produces them. Usually a pale pink (almost white), to red color.
Sakurazukamori – The name of a clan of assassins. More to the point, a single assassin who uses magic to accomplish his or her work.
san – A suffix the approximate equivalent of Mr., Mrs. or Ms.
(blank) – To leave off the suffix indicates either a grave insult if permission is not given, or complete trust if permission is given.