Furyoku is for Squares

Disclaimer: Shaman King isn't mine

"Such a beautiful morning it 'tis today!" exclaimed none other than Hao. "A morning like this...make me want to use my oversoul! Without furyoku, of course, because furyoku is for squares!"

Everyone who is anyone who has seen/read the anime/manga know that without furyoku, no matter how hard you try, you cannot create the oversoul. Hao, being ever so diligent and quick-witted, knew this full well, but did not actually care for this fact at all.

He kept on trying to create the oversoul without his furyoku, because "Furyoku is for squares!" "How...how can this be?" said Hao who was questioning the air. "Why should I have the need to use my furyoku? My pants are all that I need! And YOU, you insignificant specks of dust…BEGONE!"

After many failed attempts at trying to make the oversoul, Hao, being the stubborn child that he is, did not give up. At first, he'd attempted to get his oversoul to appear "just like that!" which proved unsuccessful. (he tried doing this while watching the Teletubbies, and who can concentrate, I ask you, while watching such a wonderful show?)

Then, Hao tried to get into the oversoul by curling up into a ball and repeating over and over, "Furyoku is for squares...furyoku is for squares...furyoku is for squares...etc." He also referred to his pants for help, as any normal person would.

This proved fruitful, for his pants suggested that he go take a bath. To make a long story short, he took a bath. In chocolate drops.

"I...I refuse to believe that furyoku is cool! I refuse to believe that it is in fashion! I shouldn't have to use furyoku! I'm the almighty Hao, with the magnificent pants that cannot be matched! Furyoku is for squares, for Yoh! (sorry Yoh fans...I had to do this...my stuffed animals told me to, so please don't tackle me...)

While Hao was outside with a tennis racket, trying to make his Spirit of Fire become the oversoul, some random children in random streetcars in random gangster outfits pointed and laughed. And laughed. And laughed. And laughed, until they could not bear to laugh anymore. (which is when Hao burned them.)

It was then that Ren came to save the day! "This has got to be the most pathetic thing I have ever witnessed in my entire life." said Ren, who was watching Hao act like a stick of butter on the ground. He laughed his head off quite thoroughly.

Hao, hearing the laughter, got into a yoga position, trying to appear like a yoga addict. It was a feat in which he failed extravagantly, I can tell you that. Ren skipped across the fields of burnt limes that were separating Hao and himself to confront Hao.

"Hao...don't you know that acting like a stick a butter won't help you get into oversoul mode? You have to use your furyoku!" exclaimed Ren.

"Me? Use my furyoku? That...that's hilarious! You expect me, the almighty Hao, to use furyoku, like you? ha ha ha! Furyoku is for squares such as yourself!" replied Hao.

"Furyoku is NOT for squares! Furyoku is for those who want to be buff and muscular like me!" said Ren.

"Like you? Who'd want to be like you? You're a square! Because furyoku is for squares!" said Hao, cracking himself up.

"That is so uncool! I'm leaving this popsicle stand! You can act like a stick of butter for all I care!" shouted a rather upset Ren. "Oh...and just so you know...furyoku isn't for squares...it's for rectangles." Then, Ren ran away for whatever reasons.

"For rectangles? Hmm...I may have to ponder that quite a bit, but I was almost certain furyoku was for squares...It IS for squares! I know it is! Ren has probably hugged too many squirrels in his day to differentiate between squares and rectangles, that fool!" thought Hao aloud.

Whether you thought furyoku is for squares or for rectangles, the moral of the story is this: You should always hug squirrels.