The clumsy hands proceeded with their task, and finally one of them reached inside the bodice.
It was then when I suddenly jerked back to my senses.
I opened my eyes and stared at the man, quite unbelieving that it had come to this.
Could I indeed be ready for this? Could I welcome this brutal violation?
Thíri, something must be terribly wrong with you. How can you possibly put things right by allowing a band of drunken ruffians take you? Will Faramir feel any better if this happens? And what about your father and brothers? What about you, you silly child?
All this flashed through my mind, and suddenly the stupor broke, giving way to frantic search for a possible escape.
Unfortunately, I had wasted too much time on stupid heroics. I should have fought at once, I should have kicked and clawed like mad; they were quite drunk and I had had a good chance. But the moment was lost, and I had to think of another way.
Suddenly, there was a clinking of metal round the corner, then I heard orders given in a steady voice. A patrol!
But before I could cry out, a broad stinking palm was pressed to my mouth.
"Hush, girlie, we will just wait until they pass," I heard.
Horrified, I tried to wriggle out of their grip, but all was in vain. No, no, it cannot be… They are so near, I just need to make a sound…
An idea struck me like a lightning.
Giving a loud sigh, I relaxed completely, letting my head loll to one side. Please, let them believe me unconscious…
They did. The two that were holding me against the wall loosened their clasp on my wrists, and the one who tried to keep me from screaming was forced to try and prevent me from falling and possibly making a noise among all that rubble.
The moment my mouth was free, I cried out at the top of my lungs.
All my life, I had been scorned by my brothers because they said I could never scream in a nice feminine way, with a proper high-pitched shriek most ladies would give at the sight of a mouse.
Never had I been so grateful for the bellow I had been gifted with instead.
The gang tried to hush me, but for them it was too late. The patrol were already on their way to my aid.
Of the commotion that followed, I had a very vague idea. The relief was too great, and I just sank onto the ground limply, feeling waves of sickness return. After a while, I was aware of a gloved hand on my shoulder.
"Speak your name, girl," a commanding voice demanded. "Where have you come from?"
"Lothíriel," I breathed. "The…the Houses…Houses of Healing."
And then all was black.
When I regained my senses, I was in my room in the Houses, lying on the bed. The Warden was there, and a healer, and Ioreth. When I saw the latter, I groaned inwardly. No doubt the whole of the Houses would soon be savouring my adventures of late.
The Warden bowed over me, eyeing me with deep concern.
"Lothíriel, it is all right, you are back here," he said soothingly.
"Whatever made you roam the City alone at night?" Ioreth grumbled. "The silliest thing ever…"
The Warden cut her short with a single glance. "Madam, there will be time for this later. Now, we have to check if she has any injuries. Here, Lothíriel, let me look at you."
He reached a hand to me, and in a split second I was sitting, hugging myself protectively and shaking my head.
"Oh, I understand," he said softly. "You would rather have a lady do this, would you not? Perhaps Ioreth…"
"No," I whispered. "No, no, no…"
"All right," he nodded reassuringly. "Who would you like me to fetch?"
Before I realised it, the name was out of my mouth. "Éowyn…"
"I shall send for her immediately."
"No, no," I said in the same fierce whisper. "She must be sleeping now. She…she will not want to see me."
The Warden smiled. "It was the Lady Éowyn who first raised the alarm. We had done a thorough search of the Houses and were preparing to go out to the City when the patrol brought you back and told us… what had happened. Both the lady and your cousin have been beside themselves with worry. So, shall I fetch her here?"
I simply nodded, desperately trying to hold back tears.
When Éowyn appeared in the doorway, with all the rest gone, I could not bring myself to look her in the eye.
She stopped a couple of paces away, and all I saw was her hand gripping the cloth of her white skirt.
"Thíri…" came a hesitant voice. I cast a tentative look at her.
I had not quite expected to see what I saw in her face. There was compassion, and guilt, and horror, and helplessness, all of it mixed together, and suddenly she rushed to my side, embracing me so tightly that I could not breathe. That was when I broke down.
I wept and wept, sobbing into the soft fabric of her dress, unable to stop. Then, choking, I started to tell her about what had nearly happened. She never said a word, she just stroked my head, twining her fingers in my tangled hair, rocking me slowly back and forth.
I finally quieted, but was reluctant to leave her arms, so we sat there silently, pressed together, and I felt totally exhausted. Éowyn bent her head to drop a kiss on my temple.
"I am so glad you are back safe," she whispered. "The hours we spent here, searching for you everywhere… and then someone said you had been seen leaving the Houses… Had anything happened to you, I should have never forgiven myself, for what I did to you."
She drew in a shaky breath, putting her hand on the back of my head and pressing me closer to herself. When I had enough strength, I pulled away slowly, looking up at her. To my surprise, her face was streaked with tears.
"Éowyn… why are you weeping?"
She shook her head sorrowfully and wiped the tears away; then, as she was prepared to speak, the door opened hesitantly and in came Faramir.
"Thíri!" he breathed in relief, instantly next to us. "Oh, cousin, what a silly thing it was that you did."
I nearly chuckled, so suddenly refreshed I felt. The slight irritation in his voice made me feel a good deal better. I started to hope that everything could yet be put right.
"I know," I said sheepishly.
"Now I do not like that tone of yours," he proclaimed. "Better your usual bickering than this…submission."
I felt my face flush in shame. "I think I got a bit too far in my bickering, Faramir. I am not even asking you for forgiveness…"
"You do not need to, cousin," he said, his eyes radiating warmth and affection, with a tinge of concern deep within. "Let us not speak of that now. But look at your dress! It is quite chilly here, cousin. You might wish to button it up."
As I occupied myself with the task, he took the coverlet and wrapped it around me like a warm cocoon.
"Better?" he smiled, reaching his hand to stroke my cheek.
As if entranced, I watched the hand approach my face, a big, strong male hand…
Before I could control myself, I screamed and clutched at Éowyn again.
Faramir's hand jerked back. He looked totally confused and hurt.
"What have I done?" he exclaimed.
"Nothing," Éowyn said, embracing me once more. "But you had better leave now. I will explain it all to you later."
He nodded obediently, looking a bit scared.
Already at the door, he turned and cast a long look at me. He seemed to want to say something, but then changed his mind and left.
Alone with Éowyn, I felt despondent.
"Oh no," I sighed. "Why do I keep hurting him?"
Éowyn sighed too. "This is not your fault. After what you have been through, it is not surprising you cannot stand a man's touch."
"But he is my cousin and I love him!" I protested.
Éowyn straightened her back, as if preparing for a plunge. "I could not abide my own brother in the circumstances, though I did my best to conceal it. But then, we are not the same person."
"Éowyn, you…" my throat closed in horror.
She nodded several times, then passed her hand over her brow, as if trying to wipe away the memories.
"There was a man in my uncle's court… his name was Gríma Wormtongue… yes, a sweet name, would you not say?" she smiled wryly at my grimace. "And suited him wonderfully. He did everything to lure my uncle into darkness, and I am sure that Théodred, my cousin, the heir to the throne, would still be living if not for him… though I may be wrong here.
"He would stalk me everywhere, in the hallways, in the stables, in the chambers… everywhere. First he tried to court me; when I turned him down, he moved to threats. He said he would make Uncle send Éomer on a hopeless mission if I do not show any compliance… That did not work with me either, for I simply said that my brother would rather die than risk my honour… oh, how I shook inside after that, fearing he would do as he threatened!
"But he did not; he was a clever one, and he realised he would not win my affections that way. So once…it was night time, and I had gone out of my chamber for a breath of fresh air, sleepless with constant worry; and he followed me and tried to force me…"
I gripped her hand tightly, feeling its faint shaking. She was breathing hard, as if after a long run uphill; then she slowly took her hand out of my grip and rubbed her brow again.
"He was a skinny man," she continued, her voice surprisingly steady, "and I had not expected anything like that from him, only it seemed that his strength doubled with his mad desire, and mine diminished. And all the while I had to be mindful not to cry, for if Éomer or Théodred ever learned of this, the consequences for them might have turned grievous. My uncle was too far gone under the spells of that evil creature, and could be persuaded to punish both his nephew and his son most severely. So I fought silently, until at last I managed to bring my knee up and into his groin.
"He bent double and hissed in pain, and I pushed him away. He fell and banged his head on the wall, and I saw blood on the floor… Thíri, I was so strangely elated by that, I could have danced for joy! He was momentarily stunned, and I thought of how easy it would be to drive my sword through him and end it once and for all.
"Of course I did not do anything, but, you know, what stopped me was the fear that I would be discovered. Sword wounds bleed a lot, my skirts would be stained with his foul blood, and I was not willing to be executed for the murder of that filth.
"So I left him there. None of us ever mentioned this to anyone. I suppose he still feared that my brother's vengeance might catch him before he could plot anything, so he preferred to keep quiet; I feared for my brother and cousin… I do not know if I was right to have been thinking so. Perhaps, had I mentioned that, justice would still be done, perhaps my uncle would have reacted somehow… I will never know that. And then, Aragorn came with his companions and delivered all of us."
The tone of her voice changed almost imperceptibly, became softer and dreamier, and I knew it.
"You are in love with him, are you not?" I said.
Her reaction surprised me. She suddenly laughed and hugged me again. "In love with him? I do not think so. I would rather say I have passed through this already. I do not need any man beside me."
There was a touch of bitterness in her laughter, and…and a little too much assertiveness in her last statement.
Before Éowyn left me to myself, I asked her to send Faramir to me.
She looked at me doubtfully. "Are you certain? I should not like any of you be hurt any more than you have already been."
"I am better, Éowyn. It is just that if I do not talk to him now, tomorrow I might not dare…"
She gave me a big and warm smile. "To think of the lengths I am prepared to go for you! Calling upon a man at this hour!"
When Faramir came in, I was out of bed; I rushed to him immediately and put my arms round him. He hugged me back, quite hesitantly. I was pleased I felt no fear or revulsion this time.
"Forgive me," I whispered, rubbing my cheek on his soft tunic. "I do not know what possessed me. I promise, I shall never want to hurt anyone like that. You least of all, Faramir, for I am so grateful to you and…and I love you so…"
"I love you too, Thíri," he said. "You do not need to torture yourself so. What you said was the truth… cruel, but true."
"It was not," I said firmly. "There are your friends there, the Rangers, and Beregond, and the Halflings, and Aragorn, and Mithrandir. And there is our family. You do have so many people to wait for, and so many remember that you are here waiting for them!"
He swallowed hard and lifted my face up to kiss my brow. "Thank you, Thíri," he said softly.
"Whatever for? My silliness?"
He shook his head, smiling at me very tenderly. "For saying 'our family' just now."
We stood together a while longer, and I felt wonderfully at peace.
"You know, Faramir," I said, "if for this moment I had to go through all of it again, I would gladly do so."
His eyebrows shot up indignantly.
"No, not so gladly, I think," I admitted hastily. "But next time I shall know how to deal with such…" I swallowed the name.
Faramir took me by the shoulders and gave me quite a violent shake. "There will be no next time, you silly child. You have made me a promise, but I want another one from you. You will never – do you hear me, never! – put yourself at such a risk again. Do you realise what I was going through?"
Suddenly, he let me go and sat onto the bed, shaking with a sudden peal of laughter.
"Forgive me, Thíri," he said at last. "I am behaving just like my father did when we were children and engaged ourselves in something like climbing down these very walls."
The memory of his family saddened him again. I seated myself at his side and said, "Well, I guess you have every right to speak to me like this, given my latest escapade."
"So, do I have that promise?" he demanded.
I sighed resignedly. "On one condition only."
"And what is that?"
I cast him a pleading look. "I am hungry."
He laughed, once more embracing me. "You are a wonder, Thíri. You remind me of the Halflings sometimes. But you will have your late dinner at once, my dear lady."
Later, we ate together (Faramir seemed quite hungry himself), and talked about everything and nothing, and Faramir confessed that he quite liked Éowyn, but I was not to mentioned it to her, or to anyone, ever, and I promised him that, but teased him rather mercilessly about it, so he threatened to tie me up and throw me out of the window.
He left to take the dishes back to the kitchens, and returned when I was already in bed.
"Came to wish me goodnight?" I asked.
He shook his head and lowered himself onto the floor. "I would like to completely exchange our places and be here with you until you sleep. See, I am even sitting on the floor, though in my room it seemed a lot cleaner."
I yawned and rolled onto my side, facing him.
"It is so good to have you here, cousin," I murmured before falling asleep. "How nice that you were wounded and did not ride off with the host."
The last thing I heard was a soft chuckle and the words, "I shall remember that," said with mock menace.
TBC
Thank you, my faithful reviewers, Steelelf, Elenhin, Catwraith, Lindahoyland, Raksha the Demon, Elijahcat, and Anne234. Your comments make my days!
Dearest Raksha, I have sent a more detailed thing to your address, if you are interested.
The story is nearing the end, by the way!
Yours,
Lilan