Kakashi's Singleness

By: Violettachan

Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto and its related characters.

The last chapter uploaded very strangely. It would appear, and then disappear from the story at random for the first couple of days... And then, I couldn't upload this chapter AT ALL even though it had been completed a long time ago. Maji uzai... Oh well. Anyways, a review today made me want to try uploading this again. (Thanks Poprice).

Oh, and I'm also toying with the ideal of making this a prequel to a story between Kakashi and someone (can't tell you yet). I want to change the point of view and move outside of Kakashi if I do that... What do you think? Or should I just continue with this as a Kakashi only thing and start from scratch??

Also: Language warning. Sakura fans beware of a frustrated Kakashi. It's not that I dislike her, but really, the girl can be annoying at times (well more like it's annoying how shounen manga portrays girls in general...grrr). However, I do like what other fanfics have done with her character (I love it when she kicks ass). I think she has the potential to be a cool character, but in the meantime, here's my story. Don't get too mad, ne?

And yes, I know the paragraph breaks are annoying, but I couldn't get my usual to show up for some reason.

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::Kakashi and Sakura::

Dear god, it was horrible... He usually needed so little (just some alone time with his book) to keep happy and yet today had been horrendous.

The team dynamic was appalling today. But the sad thing was that it was so normal for his team to be suffering from a lack of cooperation. Damn teenage hormones! Damn Sakura's crush on Sasuke!! And damn Naruto for adding his ridiculous rivalry and crush into the mixture!!!

At least he was able to keep up a façade of indifference in front of the kids. He was NOT about to give them the satisfaction of seeing him being affected by their stupidity. But it HAD kept him from being able to be in the mood to read his book, and THAT was something.

Kakashi was so fed up with the simplest of missions being turned into a big melodrama. But at least the boys didn't come to him crying afterwards. Dealing with Sakura's tears had almost made him snap...

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It had been so easy for Kakashi to assume that Sakura would overcome her childish crush on Sasuke once she actually had to work day-in and day-out with him. Well, that fantasy was crushed ever so easily...

He had been convinced that the infatuation couldn't last through the first few intense missions, since it was under such pressured situations that a teammate's faults became glaringly obvious. But his miscalculation was in assuming that Sakura liked the "flawless little Uchiha, the last survivor of the clan" and would take anything less than perfection from him as the hint that no one could live up to her rose-colored visions of love ever-lasting.

Well, she DID realize that her crush wasn't grounded in reality...but instead of ending her feelings for him, the end of her infatuation signed the beginnings of her love for him. Argh, Kakashi couldn't believe he didn't see this happening. In his la-la dreamland he had actually thought that the team would be infinitely easier to handle once Sakura got her head out of the clouds about the Uchiha boy. Nope. No way. Of course not. Why hadn't being a shinobi for so long cured him of such false hopes? Life always seemed to enjoy making him its bitch.

At least her infatuation with Sasuke could have pushed her to excel. Nope, of course not. It's always the book-smart ones that were common-sense stupid. It didn't take a genius to know that Sasuke would want a strong woman to rebuild his clan, but that connection didn't seem to quite add up in Sakura's mind. Instead of focusing on looking pretty, skinny, or whatever it was that she did, she should have focused on becoming stronger if she wanted his attention. Though it seemed that Sakura was finally beginning to get a clue after the Chuunin Exams, she was still far behind the boys.

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Kakashi knew he was being harsh on Sakura because of the day's botched mission. The girl didn't mean to cause problems. In fact, she was usually trying her best to do well. It was just that her "best" really wasn't good enough, since it only involved her effort at the moment. Ninja skills had to be polished to the sharp point necessary through mundane training; even "genius" ninjas like Kakashi had to train themselves hour after hour on their most basic skills in order to stay in peak condition. The girl just didn't have the proper motivation and strong will to go through such rigorous training on a daily basis. So her best effort almost always ended in vain and caused her to be depressed for being the deadweight of the team.

But Sakura was a smart girl. She HAD to know that she needed more training to stay abreast of her teammates. Why she didn't do so was a mystery to Kakashi; he was skilled at looking through jutsus, NOT teenage girls' minds. Even the famous Sharingan stood no chance against something as complicated as that.

He just couldn't understand where Sakura was coming from and how to help her out. There had to be something he could do. She was a nice girl where Sasuke wasn't involved. She was caring, smart, and talented in chakra control. She would make a great strategist or medic-nin if she put her mind to it.

Maybe he would just have to wait it out. At some point the girl was going to grow up and get a better grip on her emotions. She might even outgrow her feelings for Sasuke or at least learn how to use them to better herself. And until Sakura herself made the choice to become serious about ninja training, there was little Kakashi could do.

Well at least he could console himself of the fact that he didn't end up with Hinata. From what he had seen of her, she was extremely nerve-wracking to watch. His respect for Kurenai had increased every time he saw her calm Hinata from the verge of crying. Kakashi was quite sure that he wouldn't have been able to handle her fragile emotions so well. And her OBVIOUS crush on Naruto would not have been any easier to deal with than Sakura's love for Sasuke. At least Sakura didn't almost faint at every glance thrown her way during practice.

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It was a wonder how a couple hours of sleep and a good bowl of ramen helped to calm his nerves. Now that he'd gotten a chance distance himself from the day's events, Kakashi could afford to be more generous to Sakura. It was true...regardless of how much frustration she caused him, Kakashi couldn't help but think of Sakura as his favorite student. In spite of everything, Kakashi really believed that she had a chance to succeed as a ninja as much as Sasuke or Naruto.

He realized that the saying, "Baka na ko hodo kawaii" was true. He really did feel rather overprotective of her, and that was the reason that the current situation with her even bothered him. If truth be told, Kakashi couldn't remember feeling this way for anyone in such a long time. The fact that he cared for her enough to actually allow her to penetrate his nonchalance spoke for itself. In fact, his entire team seemed to have a knack for aggravating him to a point that not even Gai had been able to push him.

Maybe it was because they were the longest he'd had to deal with the same team members since his early genin days. Or maybe it was because he was going through a mid-life crisis. Whatever the case, these kids were close enough to his heart to manage to get under his skin.

Well, maybe the morning's disaster was life's way of showing him that he cared for his team. Too bad life couldn't have shown that to him in happier ways. Oh well, such was the life of a shinobi: always harder than it should be, filled with pain, and yet somehow worth it in the end.

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baka na ko hodo kawaii: A Japanese saying that loosely translates to "the stupider the kid, the cuter they are." It reflects how parents tend to become more attached to and protective of the "stupid" kid of the family, while they usually feel that the "smart" one is fine on their own/can fend for themselves.

I know some people are going to think that Kakashi is out of character in this chapter, but they don't understand what a horrid day he had...and come on; even the calmest person has to throw an inner hissy fit at some point or another.

And yes, it does seem to go against Ch. 3 Nonchalance...but I'm assuming that he's grown more attached to the kids since then and therefore are affected by them to an extent that he hadn't imagined possible at that time.

But, if you still think that Kakashi would react differently etc. please let me know and I will use that to guide me. I haven't been keeping up-to-date on the manga, so maybe I am getting out of touch with the characterization...well, I guess I'll just have to haul my butt over to the nearest furuhonya (used book store) and play catch up.

Also, thank you to all the people who have reviewed the last two chapters. I forgot to add my "thank you for reviews" section to the last chapter. Gomen.

Cdk – Thank you for your ideas on themes to explore. I really appreciate your help. I'll have to see what I can come up with for one or two of them. Plus you are one of the few that reviewed my last chapter, so that makes you extra super special!

Poprice – Your review was unexpected (cause of the timing) and got me off my lazy butt and inspired me to continue the story  Thanks.

Orange Blossom Nin – Thank you so much for your kind words. I can really relate to your frustration on trying to capture the enigmatic character of Kakashi. I hope that I can show that he is a multifaceted person, without straying too far from canon.

And to everyone else a big warm thank you!! Extra great karma to you all!!

Cheers,

Violettachan