Disclaimer: I do not own any thing from Final Fantasy X or X-2. I also do not own the song "Nobody Knows" by Tony Rich Project. I used it for the title as well as the lyrics. Please don't sue me because I have nothing to give, as I am a starving artist.
A/N: This chapter is a little short and probably because it is a song fic. You'll get a long chapter on the next one I promise. Please read and review and stay tuned for chapter seven.
Two Worlds Apart
Chapter 6: Nobody Knows
I pretend that I'm glad you went away
These four walls closin' more everyday
And I'm dying inside
And nobody knows it but me
Like a clown I put on a show
The pain is real even if nobody knows
And I'm crying inside
And nobody knows it but me
Why didn't I say the things I needed to say
How could I let my angel get away
Now my world is just tumbling down
I can say it so clearly but you're nowhere around
The warm glow from the oil lamp on the desk lit the study casting haunting shadows about the room. Baralai sat at his massive oak desk shirtless and in green flannel pajama pants. The light pounced of the curves of his chest illuminating his golden skin. He opened the bottom right drawer with the silver key that usual hung from his neck; unlocking secrets that he had thought that he had buried forever. He pulled out a black velvet box and peered in at the contents.
When Rikku had left Bevelle she had left behind all her belongings. So he decided to take the things that he treasured most and put them in a box for safe keeping. When he finally discovered when she had settled, he sent her the rest of her things. Now he sat at this desk examining the contents of that very box he had hid away less than two years ago. He pulled out a tiny stuffed chocobo, a bottle of Macalania Mist, her feathered hair clips, and a stack of photos. There had to be a good two hundred pictures in the bunch. They had been taken at various locations; on their first date, home, vacations, work, you name it and there was a picture for it. The contents of the box brought tears to Baralai's rich, deep brown eyes. Why Had I been so stupid? Why did I let my angel get away? Why hadn't I fought to keep the woman I love in my life?
Placing the contents back into the box, he once more locked away the precious treasure in his desk drawer. Standing, he blew out the flame of the lamp and headed toward his bedroom. If he didn't get into bed soon Paine would wake up and come looking for him. And he knew that she would ask questions that he didn't want to answer. He also knew that if she asked he wouldn't have the heart to lie to his pregnant wife.
The nights are lonely, the days are so sad
And I keep thinking about the love that we had
And I'm missing you
And nobody knows it but me
I carry a smile when I'm broken in two
And I'm nobody without someone like you
I'm trembling inside
And nobody knows it but me
I lie awake its a quarter past three
I'm screaming at night if I thought you'd hear me
Yeah, my heart is calling you
And nobody knows it but me
Baralai lay in bed with his arm securely wrapped around Paine. He listened as she snored softly against his chest. Looking up at the carved wooden ceiling above him he wondered if Yevon was punishing him for loving two women at once. He couldn't figure out how he had gotten here. How he was surviving in this endless charade or how he was going to end it. All his life his one wish had been to make the people of Spira happy. And do right by them. Never asking anything in return but in his heart of hearts all he ever really wanted was the eternal love of a certain Al Bhed girl. Maybe she would have never left if he hadn't pushed her into it. But he had just been so angry when he discovered that her heart did not solely belong to him. It just wasn't like him to become jealous like that. But you know what they say, love can do strange things to you. But what could he do? It was all in the past and there was just no going back. Searing drops of pain flowed down his faintly flushed cheeks. His heart raced with each pulsating pump. His entire body became enveloped in pain. Ironically the woman lying next to him name was Paine. Pulling his young pregnant wife closer to his body he held her like there wasn't going to be a forever. He had failed to protect Rikku and she had been standing not two inches from him. What if the bullet had been meant for him? What if she was going to die because of him? He couldn't protect Rikku but come hell or high water he would protect Paine and their unborn child.
How blue can I get
You could ask my heart
But like a jigsaw puzzle it's been torn all apart
A million words couldn't say just how I feel
A million years from now
You know I'll be lovin' you still
Tomorrow mornin' I'm hitting the dusty road
Gonna find you wherever, ever you might go
I'm gonna unload my heart and hope you come back to me
Said when the nights are lonely
The nights are lonely, the days are so sad
And I keep thinking about the love that we had
And I'm missing you
And nobody knows it but me