After that amazing last chapter about the greatest goddess ever (I'm assuming we all know who the author is by this point), I now give you... another chapter. Knowledge prerequisites:
Morpheus: god of dreams. You would remember him best in The Odyssey on the island of the Lotus-Eaters.
Druid: Celtic priests. Yes I added another cameo.. Its an addiction. I swear I'll stop.
Eros AKA Cupid. The god of Love and making people fall in love.
Theseus (the guy who killed the Minotaur) was asked by Peirithous to help him kidnap Persephone. Well, after they stated their case in front of Hades, he had them sit down on a bench, which they were stuck on. Heracles finally freed Theseus, leaving his thighs on the bench.
OK, that's it. Oh and look who finally figured out how to use the page breaker!
When the sun rose the next morning, it was greeted by a scream and commotion. The new goddesses had just all received a pamphlet with some very important information on it.
Congratulations Goddesses, on the completion of your training! All of your mentors are extremely proud of you and your accomplishments. There will be a ceremonial banquet tonight, in honor of you. Grand Hall, Mount Olympus. You may bring one guest with you.
Nicole, Lauren and Colleen sighed happily at the last line, knowing that they were already covered guest-wise. However, some goddesses weren't.
A blur of green whizzed across Ancient Greece, leaving havoc and posters in its wake. Aubrey was frantically looking for a date for the ceremony tonight. Armed with a hammer and paper, the goddess was busy putting up personal ads for a "dark handsome and sexy stranger, must be at least 6 foot. Foot fetishes are not wanted, and must not have been previously screwed by an immortal." So far she was not having any luck. Running full speed in her sedan chair, Aubrey had just arrived at Thebes and was putting up a bulletin in the local temple, when she felt a rough hand on her shoulder.
"Pardon my asking oh goddess, but have you forgotten me?"
Aubrey nearly melted with relief right on the spot.
"Hello Calix."
Nicole, Colleen and Lauren decided to go hit up a mortal boutique before the banquet. "Mmm," breathed Lauren, sampling a fragrance bottle of crushed rose and ambrosia. Colleen and Nicole were busy trying on strands of gold, watching the soft light from the crystal lanterns dazzle on the far wall. "This store is awesome." Whispered Nicole, not wanting to disturb the atmosphere of the place. Finally, after a good hour of shopping, the trio decided on their items for purchasing. Nicole left with a pink silk shawl embroidered with silver thread, three strands of coral beads and a bottle of "Wild Flower". Colleen chose a set of ruby and gold earrings to match her dress, Jasmine perfume and a small set of diamonds to decorate her nails with. Lauren decided to exercise her goddessness to the max, and bought satin shoes the color of sea foam adorned with pink pearls, a cobalt choker bracelet and brooch set, two bottles of "Goddess Essence", and to top it all off, a tiara made of blue glass.
"Ok, I'm ready to go." She said, lugging her treasures behind her.
Megan rolled up her sleeves and grabbed her weapons. It was time to go "guy-hunting," but in pure Mego-monkey style.
Lindsay yawned, rolled over, and continued sleeping.
A cool breeze fluttered by, shaking branches and twisting hair. All except for the spiked 'do of Liz that is. The goddess was sitting outside, shining up her staff. She didn't have a date, wasn't looking for one, but god damnit she wasn't about to be going to the banquet with her duck staff in disrepair. With a final whirl of the rag, Liz gave a satisfactory nod and stood up. Suddenly the sky above her darkened, threatening rain. Liz shrugged, quickly turned her staff into an umbrella, and started in towards the new goddess complex. However, she was stopped shortly as purple raindrops fell from the sky, sending little sparks everywhere as they hit earth. Raising an eyebrow, Liz looked around for the cause of this oddity, but saw no one. Instead, she observed small beetles emerging from the ground, glowing yellow and singing hymns. Then with out warning, everything went dark.
Trying not to panic, Liz gripped her staff tensely as the world around her swirled and changed colors. "I know your out there damnit!" she yelled, "Don't make me come and find you!" There was no response. Growling, the prankster goddess scanned her sickening horizons, looking for a weak spot. To her left, she spotted a normal-looking shrub, and attacked with all her strength.
"OW! Holy shit woman, I was only kidding around! Stop it!"
Liz dealt out one last smack and then stepped back to smugly survey her handiwork. Crouching where the bush had been was a young man, presumably a god, with his hands above his head protectively. Sensing that the terrible onslaught had ceased, he stood up. Liz felt her pulse quicken slightly: he was kind of cute.
The god's raven black hair fell asymmetrically across his face, covering a deep violet eye. The other one was an intense green, and held Liz in its gaze for a good five minutes. Finally, after a bit of silence, the god shook his head and swept into a deep bow, revealing black crow feather wings sprouting from his shoulders. "My apologies." He said, straightening up while smoothing out his slightly tattered ebony tuxedo. With a quick fluid motion, he produced a cane of pale white birch out of the air, topped with a large purple crystal. Leaning forward, the god allowed his lips to brush Liz's hand. "I didn't mean to startle you," he said pleasantly, "but I was rather shy, and didn't quite know how to introduce myself to such a lovely creature as yourself."
Liz narrowed her eyes, and raised her hand to smack this insolent man over the head for his blatant sarcasm and sappiness, but as she saw him flinch, it dawned on the goddess that he wasn't joking. Lowering her hand, she extended it out for a handshake.
"Liz, goddess of random pranks on mortals."
The god's eyes sparkled. He took her hand in an elegant shake.
"Morpheus, god of dreams."
Well, that explains a lot thought Liz happily.
A man in scarlet robes was walking throughthe forest, limping slightly on his bad leg. He was getting very tired and kind of annoyed. Where the hell was Mount Olympus? The god shook his head of curly red hair and took a few more steps in one direction before deciding to change course. He hadn't gone two feet when suddenly a tall figure wearing a goat skull leapt out at him. The god gave a scream and backed away in alarm as the figure in black shook a blue plastic maraca at him and spewed pink and black silly string from its fingers. "You are in MY woods." the figure cackled, the large goat's skull glowing an eerie white. The god paled and held up his hands in defeat.
"Please, I got lost.Can you show me where Mount Olympus is? And please, don't kill me."
The figure stopped shaking for a moment, placing the maraca and silly string in some invisible pocket deep within the black robes. Reaching up, it removed the goat skull to reveal a goddess with long brown hair to her waist. "Mount Olympus?" she inquired, shaking out her robes. Several fake-looking leaves fell to the ground and the twin red dragons embroidered on the front of her robes danced menacingly. A huge high-heel peaked out from beneath the fabric, black and spindly.
"Yes, Mount Olympus," the god said, taking a step back as the brunette drew out an onyx sword encrusted with emeralds. "There's a party there for some new goddesses, and I want to arrive soon."
The druid/goddess's ears perked up. "Oooh, a party. I'll come with you." she said cheerfully. "Oh, and by the way, I'm Sarah, goddess of S.L.U.T.S. and heels."
The red-haired god raised an eyebrow. "Sluts?"
Sarah nodded and twirled her sword. Suddenly out the ground a huge shadowy polar bear/dragon emerged, with six legs, crooked horns and nasty teeth. "S.L.U.T.S." Sarah explained and the god backed up in fear, "Scary Large Unnatural Things." Then she extended her hand down for a handshake. The god took it earnestly.
"Name's Hephaestus. Now, which way is Olympus?"
Lindsay blinked once or twice sleepily, scratched her head, and slipped out of consciousness again.
The underworld was usually a quiet place, but today however, it was anything but. The door to the Elysian Fields smoked, smoldered, and finally exploded. As Hades cowered on the ground, trying to avoid hot shrapnel, he noted a figure emerging through the portal, slowly picking her way through the debris. "Tried to keep ME from the ceremony." Huffed Becca, smoke still drifting from her fingertips, "Well, we'll just see about that."
To her right, the goddess spotted two men sitting on a stone bench. They both turned their gaze to the fiery immortal, pleading with her silently to set them free. Becca rolled her eyes. "I can't stand wusses," she mumbled, yanking the one on the left off the bench, "but you're hot, and I need a date. Let's go."
"Lalala." Sonomi hummed to herself, enjoying the sweet breeze as it rushed past her face. The goddess lay back in her hammock, watching the leaves on the trees glide away, and then return in a dizzying constant motion. Closing her eyes, Sonomi suddenly heard a soft swooshing noise. Sitting, up, she was unexpectedly engulfed gently in a white sheet. "Oh!" gasped the goddess, not really alarmed. A soft chuckle came from above her, and the sheet-which was really a white feathered wing- was slowly lifted from Sonomi's eyes. Looking up, the goddess recognized the face smiling shyly down at her.
"You were at the ceremony when we first came." She commented, swinging her legs out and jumping down from the hammock to get a better view of her visitor. He was cheery and dimple-faced, with twinkling brown eyes: an almost Asian complexion. From his shoulders rose white wings, drapping his body and covering his toga. Sonomi stood patiently, waiting for an introduction.
"Yea, uh… my name's Eros, and I'm uh, a god, but you knew that, and uh I'm god of doves, I mean love, and uh…"
Sonomi giggled as Eros turned a beet red. The god stammered a few more words, and then took a deep breath. "OK, let's try this again. Would you like to go to the ceremony with me tonight?"
"Sure." Sonomi said cheerfully, reaching over to caress his feathered shoulders. "You're really soft." She said dreamily.
"Yea! That's what you get for looking at me!" yelled Megan gleefully as she let loose a shower of furious shocks on a helpless mortal cowering before her. Despite his pleas, he was soon reduced to a twitching heap. Seeing that her job was done here, Megan smiled and moved on, leaving a trail of bodies and castration in her wake.
Katie's heart thudded in her throat as she knocked on the door to Hermes's castle. Today she would finally work up her courage to ask her hot tutor out. As the seconds ticked by, the butterflies in her stomach turned into little demons and started twisting and churning Katie's insides. Literally. "What if he's with another girl?" they hissed, "What if he says no? What if he's gay?"
Suddenly the door creaked open, and Katie had to shut up the inner voices to concentrate on smiling. "Hi Hermes," she said, "Do you mind if I come in?" The god smiled at seeing his former student and quickly ushered her inside with a "How wonderful to see you! Hope you're doing well. How's Liz?"
Katie bristled at the last question, and stiffly replied that her fellow goddess was probably fine. Hermes went on as if nothing had happened, but the moment he stopped talking, there was a huge awkward silence between the two immortals. Katie fidgeted and picked at her dress.
"Ok, Hermes, here is the deal. You see there's a banquet tonight, in honor of us becoming goddesses I mean, and um, we can bring someone with us, and well…"
As the blonde goddess trailed off, blushing like crazy, Hermes gave her a wink and a friendly pat on the head.
"Sure I'll go with you! I don't have anything to do today. We can go as friends, and I can scope out all of your hot fellow goddesses."
Katie's hopeful gaze fell to the floor. "Oh," she said simply, brushing at her cheeks, "that's fine. I guess I'll see you there then."
Hermes rolled his eyes in exasperation, and suddenly Katie found herself swept off the floor, clinging to the god's shoulders in surprise. "You may be cute and talented," Hermes said, "but you are thick my dear."
Before Katie could respond, he sealed his invitation with a kiss.
As Helios dawned his purple and orange robes of sunset, the royal bugles sounded atop Mount Olympus. Mortals heard it for miles and looked up in awe and wonder, picturing the wonders it was signifying. For the goddesses, this meant only one thing: party time. Lauren and Ares were the first to arrive, followed by an annoyed Megan. The three immortals caught their breath as they entered the Grand Hall. Somehow the walls had been taken down, so it looked like a huge pavilion surrounded by a beautiful green garden full of flowers and fruit trees. Pale streamers floated high in the air, shimmering in the evening sun and reflecting the light onto the huge crystal slab in the center of the room that was the table. The top of the hall opened up to what looked like thousands of stars. Soon they exploded into life however, and it was revealed that they were diamond butterflies. In the background the soft tingling of bells was heard and sweet scents lingered in the air.
The three immortals sat at the large crystal table, Megan at one end and the couple at the other. Soon Aubrey and Calix entered, followed by Colleen and Dionysus, Liz and Morpheus, Sonomi and Eros, Nicole and Apollo, Becca and Theseus, and a beaming Katie with Hermes in tow. There was slight confusion as a druid entered the scene, escorted by an unknown god, but they were soon recognized as Sarah and Hephaestus. Jason came in, obviously pleased, Aphrodite's hand on his arm. Such a pimp. Finally Lindsay stumbled sleepily into the room. "Wow" she said, amazed as everyone else was by the decorations. Then she ran into a chair, which she promptly sat down in.
Soon all the goddesses were talking softly amongst themselves, detailing their major victories and defeats in the process of their training. Suddenly the air at the head of the table began to shimmer and shake. With a bright flash of light, Zeus and his two brothers, Hades and Poseidon walked into the room, clapping vigorously. Hades and Poseidon glared at Lindsay and Becca, who made several threatening gestures and returned the evil eye. Zeus cleared his throat and hastily began his speech before any fighting had a chance to break out.
"Esteemed goddesses," he began, then added "and god" as an afterthought. "Today is a day of celebration for you all. We wish to congratulate you for your success in becoming goddesses of Mount Olympus. Now, let the feasting begin!" With that he clapped his hands and took a seat along with Hades and Poseidon at the far end of the table. Soon the table was laden with huge piles of steaming food, succulent and tempting. Lindsay looked around the table, as if observing something for the first time.
"Hey Megan, we're the only ones without dates."
The two single goddesses looked at each other and smiled. As cheesy romance music swelled up in the background, they turned and started to throw food at all the happy couples. Nicole screamed and ducked behind Apollo as a spoonful of curried rice was thrown her way. Liz was busy defending off matzo balls while Sonomi and Aubrey each got hit with turkey legs. "OWW!" yelled Colleen, after getting plastered with a deviled egg, "OK, you two need to stop it now!" Still grinning evilly, the two goddesses high-fived each other and sat down primly. Soon order was restored.
As the goddesses cleaned up and started eating, everyone chatted happily and the mood around the table was that of levity and excitement. The goddesses with dates were getting to know them, while the goddesses with boyfriends were definitely getting to know them. "Would you like to pet the banana?" Ares asked Lauren coyly, gesturing to his, um, platter. The blonde goddess turned beet-red and giggled into her soup.
Liz was busy having a thumb war with Morpheus when she suddenly paled and gave a small shriek. Startled, everyone turned her way. Soft murmurs could be heard coming from Liz's forehead- it was Dirty Clarence, shaking with fear. Liz listened to all he had to say, and stood up gravely.
"Attention everyone! Yes, everyone. Shut up Megan. I have some fucked up news. You all know Pan right? My informant has informed me that he let the Titans and the Cyclops out and wants to wage war on Mount Olympus!"
There was a collective gasp. Could it be true?
Liz nodded. "I shit you not." she said seriously. "They've already attacked the Amazons. Artemis, Hera and Athena are busy keeping them at bay there, but soon more troops will storm up the mountain!"
With this, Liz collapsed onto the floor, and had to be carried back to the table. Zeus then stood up solemnly. "Brothers, Aphrodite, new goddesses," he announced, "It is time to prepare for war!"