Disclaimer: I own ONLY AnneMarie, Fabiola, Madam Velosomikh, Madamé Císerosa, K.C. Anderson, Amelia Herrington, and baby Mariah.
Summary: This may be out of order in whatever way, but hey, its my story, I get to decide how it goes. ;-) Sorry if it takes a while for me to get it posted, but I've been writing it in whatever time I get between classes and stuff and I'm laptop less so its all scribbled down on paper and I've actually gotta find time to type it all up. But hopefully I'll find enough time somewhere. =) Also, I've decided to make it easier on people to let me know what they think, and give me more ideas of what to write. If you would like, I can be reached via email or Yahoo! messenger at AdorableKittens2002@Yahoo.com or via AOL instant messenger as PrincessSpzMnky . Feel free to drop me a line if you'd like. =) Happy Reading! =)
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Dedication: I am dedicating this chapter, as well as the next few, to my Grandmother whom I lost to Alzheimers on
December 6, 2003. I actually wrote these the other day when I was having a really bad day, but didn't understand why until
just before going to bed, when I looked at the calendar. It was also the same day I ran into my grandmother's friends at the
grocery store. Its amazing how depressed you can get completely by accident. But anyway, to my Grandma Ruth . . .
These last 4 months have been very hard without you, but I know that you are watching over all of us; helping us to heal
and to move forward. Thank you for all the years of endless love and support you have given our family. We all love &
miss you more than you know!
For more information on the horrific disease known as Alzheimers, please visit alz.org
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Author's Note: After spending HOURS in the hospital with my grandmother, several times in the few short weeks before she died, I can honestly tell you how much stress runs through your body as you scared and very anxiously sit, waiting for any news. And let me tell you, while you're stuck sitting there, you sure as hell don't feel like eating! Anyway, my advice? . . . . . Its something my uncle (on the opposite side of the family) told me just a few weeks before my grandma passed away. It is something that he learned the hard way after my other grandma passed away when I was just a little kid. This is something that I am VERY glad I listened to, and I hope that you can all take to heart too . . . . .
Cherish your family while you still can, because one day they won't be here anymore, and you will spend your entire life wishing that you could just have one more day. I am very glad I listened to my uncle and spent the time with my grandmother while I still could. I only wish that I had done more . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
These next few chapters are also dedicated to my bestest friend in the entire universe, who has been there for me through everything, from day one. You know who you are. Thank you for always letting me be my witchy self and running up a MASSIVE phone bill through all those late night talks. Thanks also for always smothering me with chocolate. Somehow you always manage to mail it, so it arrives just when I'm really depressed. (If I didn't know better, I would think you plan these things!) LOL Anyway, thank you for always being the bestest, most amazing friend and "sister" I could ever ask for. I don't have any idea what I would do without you! (Its your fault this stupid story is here anyway, ya big Butt Head! ;-) Tehehe!) I love you! =)
WARNING!!!!!
IF YOU AREN'T CRYING ALREADY, I CAN JUST ABOUT GUARANTEE THAT YOU WILL BE VERY SOON. SO STOP WHAT YOU ARE DOING AND IMMEDIATELY RUN FOR TISSUES! YOU WILL BE NEEDING THEM! YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED!
Breaking Hearts
"Mom . . . . . . . . . . I can't lose her . . . . . . . . . . ."
" . . . . .Honey . . . . . . . . . . . Kimberly is in pretty bad shape . . . . . . . . ."
" . . . . . . . . . How bad? . . . . . . . . . . . ."
"Sweetie . . . . . . . . ." Christine sighed. "We're pretty sure that . . . . . . . If it weren't for Kimberly's seatbelt . . . . . She wouldn't be with us right now . . . . . . . . . ." Tommy sighed, letting out the breath he had been holding for what seemed like hours.
" . . . . . . . Can . . . . . . . . . Can I see her? . . . . . . . . ."
"Tommy, I need to warn you . . . . . . . Kimberly really isn't doing too well . . . . . ."
"She's a fighter Mom . . . . . . ."
" . . . . . . . I know . . . . . . . . . . . She's fighting for her life in there . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Honey . . . . . . . . . We almost lost her in there . . . . . . . . . . . More than once . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . ." Tommy closed his eyes as a massive amount of pain washed over him. " . . . . . . . . . Tommy, Kimberly's heart stopped for about a minute . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . ." Tears flowed down Tommy's face, as Christine watched him. " . . . . . . . . . . . Kimberly is in very critical condition . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . The doctors are doing all that they can . . . . . . . But for right now, they've done all that they can . . . . . . . . . Kimberly has a broken leg, and her kneecap was completely shattered . . . . . . . There is a lot of swelling in her spine, and one of her lungs was punctured by a broken rib . . . . . . . . But the worst part is the swelling at the base of her brain stem . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . ."
Sometimes it's hard when you're so deep inside
To see all you can lose in a blink of an eye
Dreams could be shattered
You could be gone
How would I survive
Cause you're where I belong
My soul-believer
Without you, I don't know who I would be
Underneath, I can feel you move through me
Inside out, you surround me
I breathe you like I'm taking my last breath
Oh, you're everything I know
So how could I let you go
Sometimes I listen to a voice that isn't mine
I disconnect from everything inside
And I have made choices
And wasted all the days
I could have been with you
Where my heart stayed
I know you've waited faithfully
Blessing our love even stronger
Underneath, I can feel you move through me
Inside out, you surround me
breathe you like I'm taking my last breath
Oh, you're everything I know
So how could I let you go
And I've been blessed
For every kiss
For every breath
(How could I let you down)
And I've been touched,
By hands I trust
My love is risen
Underneath, I can feel you move through me
Inside out, you surround me
I breathe you like I'm taking my last breath
Oh, you're everything I know
So how could I let you
How could I let you go
Christine wrapper her son in her arms again, as all the information washed over him, and began to sink in.
I don't need your strength anymore
Cause you've made me strong
You may not see the one light in me
And you dreamed of
Holding me in your arms
All the days that you gave
All the moments you've saved me,
Praying for my life
Sacrificed, just to make me who I am on my own
You don't have to let go
You don't say it
But it's in your eyes
All the fears of good-bye
But I can promise
You'll always have a place, and a way to my heart
All the days that you gave
All the moments you've saved me,
Praying for my life
Sacrificed, just to make me who I am on my own
You don't have to let go
I can live
Cause you lived for me
And I can love
Because you loved me.
All the days that you gave
All the moments you've saved me,
Praying for my life
Sacrificed, just to make me who I am on my own
You don't have to let go
(Ooh ooh ooh)
You don't have to let go
" . . . . . . . Tommy . . . . . If you still want to go see Kimberly, you can . . . . . . . . ." Tommy took a deep breath, trying to calm himself down. " . . . . . Sweetie, when is the last time you ate something?"
"I can't eat . . . . ." Tommy answered in a hoarse, shaky voice.
"Tommy, you need your strength to get through this. You need to eat."
"I really could care less about myself right now."
"Kimberly wouldn't want to see you like this."
"She can't. She's probably gonna be in a coma for a while."
"Tommy . . . . . . . . . Try to think positive . . . . ."
" . . . . . I'll eat when Kimberly is getter . . . . ." Christine just sighed.
"How in the world did I raise such an incredibly stubborn son? I'm not stubborn! And neither is your father! What the heck happened to you?!?"
"You're not funny."
"Sweetie . . . . . Honey, dry your face, so I can take you to see Kimberly." Christine said getting up to grab Tommy a napkin off a nearby table.
To Be Continued . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
"Underneath" &
"You Don't Have To Let Go"
© Jessica Simpson
In This Skin 2003