Chapter 5

Erik's decision

Author's note: Why am I so mean to my poor, misunderstood Phantom? EVIL LAUGH Well I hope that this chapter is a good one. I am going to switch back and forth between Erik's and Christine's point of views in this chapter; Erik's might be a little hard to understand, I'm going for an abstract idea here. Hopefully my muse won't run out on me…If you have any suggestions for the story, please review! And thanks to those who have already!

NOTE: Christine does not know that the Phantom's real name is Erik…he never told her, and Madam Giry doesn't think it's her business to say.

Disclaimer: The Phantom of the Opera belongs to me! HAHAHA! Oh and I am also a compulsive liar…

I would also like to do my first ever chapter dedication to Elwen of Imladris. Thank you so much for your encouraging and kind words. I do hope you like this chapter…

And now, on with the story…

Erik felt himself floating. Or maybe falling? He couldn't be sure. He just felt like a huge amount of strain and pressure was being lifted off of him. Did he feel any pain? No-it was wonderful, no intense pain, no pressure in his lungs, not even that faint pain in his hands when he played too long…This was…nice. Erik didn't know where he was, but he immediately liked it better than where he had been. He felt warmth against his face; his entire face…Wait! Erik reached up to touch his face…and was shocked to find that his mask was gone! But wait…where were the scars? Where were the angry red whelps that had marred his face his whole life? They were simply…gone. Erik let out a gasp, then a scream of joy that seemed to shatter the dream world that he was in. He looked as his body, and realized, with a shock, two things: one, he wasn't standing on anything-he truly was floating in a sea of whiteness. The second thing was a bit more shocking…he had no clothes on. No mask, no shirt, no pants, not even socks. But he didn't feel expose, he didn't feel cold…he felt nothing. Nothing but the warmth that was spreading throughout his body. It reminded him of his first kiss. Kiss…that first kiss hadn't been too long ago, right? Erik could remember the warm tingly feeling that the kiss had left with him, but he couldn't remember who he had shared it with…Who would want to kiss this carcass, a living corpse…Erik thought roughly. But in this place, it didn't seem to matter that he was a broken man, or that he couldn't remember much, or that his unholy face was pure and beautiful. This was the oddest thing he had ever experienced in his short 35 years. (I don't know how old the Phantom truly is…so in my story he'll be 35. Sorry) That's when it hit him. Perhaps this place wasn't just inside his mind. Perhaps, now, he floated in the middle of life and the afterlife. This was a disbelieving moment in Erik's life. He had always denied that there was a God, citing that a God wouldn't make a creature as repulsive as he was. Why would God put a man like him on the Earth, to go where none wanted him, to see the beauty around him and never touch it…Now, it seemed, Erik had made a fatal error in judgment. Maybe if he could remember what had happened…

His normally sharp, clear mind seemed hazy. It was like his mind didn't want him to remember the last moments of his life… He remembered falling by his desk, and he remembered hands turning him to his side-they were small hands, hands of women…but why would women be in his lair after the mob came and went? It didn't make sense. What else could he remember? Erik thought of his music box. He had finally heard it…and didn't he make a deal with himself that all he needed was to hear his music box one last time before he let himself succumb to death?…it seemed that his body had held him to that promise. But there was something else…no not something, but someone! But who? It was shocking and relieving at the same time, to look upon this face as he died. Erik remembered reaching up to touch the soft, velvety brown curls…who did they belong to? Why couldn't he remember? It was as if his mind knew that if he had this knowledge, that something would change, be different in some way. Wait…what was that? There was an echo of a scream, and it was vibrating through Erik's mind… That voice…I wonder what's wrong, Erik thought carefree. The voice wasn't important, his mind whispered. Just move forward. All right, I will, Erik told the voice, not thinking it strange at all to have a voice in his head. Especially since he himself had been the voice in Christine's head for so long…

CHRISTINE!

Erik jerked abruptly. Every memory, every moment with his brown-eyed angel surged through his mind. The barrier was gone; he knew her every feature. He had drawn her, painted her, and sculpted her until he had memorized every eyelash, every freckle…and now he saw again the face that he gazed upon before he died, the voice that was ripped in anguish, they belonged to her…and it was because of him that she was miserable. Erik couldn't move on! He had to go back to her, had to be with her, she had returned to him…

But wait…what happiness would he be able to give to Christine? What kind of life could he give her? Hiding in darkness, away from prying eyes…Christine deserved more than that. She deserved to be in the light. Erik wanted her so badly that the pain that had left him returned full force. He couldn't go back. He would press forward, into the light. He did this for her…

But then…what was that he heard?…

Angel, oh God, Angel, please don't leave me…Fate is cruel, I know…Grant me this one wish…Bring back my Angel…Father…Help me…Angel, I love you…

Come to me, strange Angel…

Erik grinned. Well, that settles that…he thought wirily. He was going to give up everything to gain everything in return. He looked about again, staring into the light, trying to preserve this moment into his memory, knowing that when he stepped from the light he would be returned to his true form, that of an angel trapped within a monster…His hand went hesitantly to the right side of his face, relishing the joy that feeling smooth skin gave him. Could he give it up? 'Angel, I love you' repeated in his mind. He immediately turned from the light, his decision made, and was surprised to find the darkness there to greet him. Ah, just how I like it…

Christine sat motionless beside the Phantom's still body. It had been a mere minute since he had taken his last gulp of air, but it felt like an eternity to Christine. Tears were streaming down her face, but she tried to be strong. She had to help, as much as she could, but right now she felt utterly useless. Madam Giry had taken charge. She had found the gunshot wound in the Phantom's chest, and had been somewhat relieved to discover a twin wound on his back. This, she explained to Christine, was good, it meant that the bullet had went straight through the Phantom's body; it was not lodged anywhere within. Madam Giry told Christine that they were going to perform something called CPR on the Phantom. But first, they had to stop the bleeding wound in his chest.

Madam Giry had instructed her daughter to find something they could press against it, something soft and durable. Meg went into the bedroom area, and came back with a pillow and some of the Phantom's shirts. The shirts were slashed and used as make-shift compresses, and the pillow was placed under the Phantom's head. Madam Giry turned the Phantom onto his back, and began pumping air into his lungs. Every so often, she stopped, and Christine rose from her position to blow air through the Phantom's lips. Each time she did it she felt that she would die as well…the last time she had kissed those lips, they had been full and warm and inviting. Now they were cold and unresponsive.

Christine could tell that Madam Giry was getting tired. She didn't know how much longer they could keep this up. The adrenaline was fleeing Christine's body, and she knew the same to be true for Madam Giry and Meg. As another minute ticked by Christine finally burst out:

"Angel, oh God, Angel, please don't leave me! Fate is cruel, I know! Grant me this one wish! Bring back my Angel!" She yelled the words as loud as she could. The echoes were all around, and for a moment Christine felt that maybe God and her Angel could hear her…

"Father, help me, please" This pleading cry was softer; she couldn't think of anyone else to turn to.

Despair was starting to settle over Christine. She would have to live with her decision to leave her Angel for the rest of her life. Christine leaned forward to her Angel's ear, and whispered the words for him alone:

"Angel, I love you!"

Come to me, strange Angel… Christine was silent. Would her Angel respond? He had somehow always known exactly what she was thinking…would he know now?

Madam Giry looked at Christine.

"One more breath, my dear. One more. We have done all we can…" Madam Giry's voice was strained and sad. She surveyed Erik one more time…he had lost a lot of blood; she didn't know how long he had been unconscious when they arrived; and she knew that the time had come to let the peace that Erik found in death claim him completely. She didn't want to give up…she wanted Erik to live! But she knew…he would go to a better place.

Christine did not respond to Madam Giry at all. She simply reached down to give her love one last, lifesaving kiss…

Christine kissed the Phantom's lips. She filled his lungs with all the air that she could…but she knew it wasn't enough. Pulling her lips away from his, she closed her eyes and said goodbye to her Angel. When she opened her eyes again, she was staring into a pair of hypnotic blue-green eyes that were piercing their way into her soul. She was absolutely captivated by his eyes. They flickered slightly, and then returned in full force to stare into Christine's. Christine backed away slightly. She lifted her head to Madam Giry's. Madam Giry was astounded. She leaned down over the Phantom to see for herself. The Phantom's eyes never left Christine's. Was this possible? Christine was absolutely shocked. Was he ok? Christine saw the Phantom crack a small smile.

"Nice…to see you too,…Christine. I'll need…a wake up call…like that…every morning."

Christine was overjoyed! She had never felt such a happiness before in all her life. Her body moved instinctive towards her Angel's, and before she knew what was happening Christine was kissing him, hard, on the lips. This time, the lips were full of life and warmth, and they responded to her kiss by deepening it. Christine was now aware of only her Angel and herself…

"Ahem…Christine!" Madam Giry's voice pierced through the mist in Christine's brain that the kiss had put there. "He almost died. Give him a moment to catch his breath before you take it again."

Christine blushed profusely. She looked down at her Angel. His eyes still focused on her's.

"Are you a dream…or am I still dead?" The Phantom's tired voice rose in the silence of the lair.

"I'm real, Angel. I'm here, and I am never going to leave again," Christine said firmly.

"Christine…my name…is Erik."

Erik. Her Angel, her Phantom, had a name…Christine liked the way it sounded in her mind. She said it out loud:

"Erik…Erik, I love you!" Christine watched as Erik's eyes widened at the use of his name and at the declaration that Christine had made, and he smiled slightly. Christine reached out and brushed a piece of Erik's hair away from his eyes. The tenderness was there between them both. They would never part again.

Madam Giry cleared her throat. "Christine, he's not out of the woods by any means. We have to disinfect and bandage all the wounds. If he gets an infection, it could lead to fever. I don't know how we're going to do this…"

"I'll help!" Meg exclaimed suddenly. "I can come down here whenever I get a moment. Christine can stay pretty much the whole time; we can say that she needed some time to gather herself after everything that has happened."

Christine looked at Meg in shock. "Why-"

Meg answered matter-of-factly: "Because you love him, silly. I may not understand everything, but I know what kind of person you are. If this is the man for you, then we can't just let him slip away!"

"Well…now that we're…done deciding…my fate…," a weak voice rose up from the floor, "how about…finding a way…to get me off…this floor…"

The three girls looked at each other quietly. In their minds and hearts they made a promise to each other. They were going to save this Phantom, no matter what. Seriousness aside, Christine looked around wildly.

"How in the world are we going to do that?"

Note: CharmedLeoLvr: Thank you for your review! I hope that you like the coming chapters! I won't give up on this story; I couldn't leave you hanging…

DarkFire77: I did as you commanded…;)