It begins at the hot springs, where .hack/gift left us. Three certain player characters were caught.
Mimiru and BT yelling at Crim: What the hell were you doing? -Mimiru is beating Crim with her baseball bat-
Crim: I - ow - the truth is - ow... stop - i am gay. It was Sora's idea - ow- the truth is, i am really gay.
- Everyone looks at Crim, shocked, and then to Sora - BT: You little pervert!
Sora: I'm outta here. BOING! -he flies away on puppet strings-
Meanwhile, Subaru is beating the living crap out of Ginkan.
Subaru is still nude: YOU FUCKER! -beats-
Ginkan: oww... Subaru-sama... somehow i am enjoying this... oops.
Subaru: WHAT DID YOU SAY? -kicks his ass even harder-
Meanwhile... somewhere else at the hot springs... Elk is crying in Tsukasa's arms. Elk: And then... -sob- Mia raped me... -cries-
Tsukasa: There, there, buddy, its ok... -pats-
Annnnnd... somewhere else... Kite has managed to get up the courage to ask Blackrose out.
Kite: So... Blackrose... you think sometime maybe we could.
Piros: HARK!
-Inside Kite, something snaps-
Kite twitching: I HAD TO PUT UP WITH YOU THROUGH FOUR FUCKING GAMES! THERE IS NO WAY I CAN STAND ANY MORE OF YOU DURING THIS STUPID PARODY!
-Kite data drains Piros-
-Everyone applauds-
-Mistral and Natsume gate in-
Mistral: Sorry we're late everyone! We couldn't figure out where it was and Natsume kept running into things! (
Natsume: -trips and falls into hot springs-
Mistral sees the data drained Piros which is now a mini-Piros
Mistral: Oh how cute! -cuddles mini-Piros- YAY:D mini-Piros crying: HARK! HARK! HARK! it sounds all squeeky and even more annoying
-Suddenly, Helba gates in-
Helba: Everyone, may i have your attention, please!
Balmung: Will the real Tsukasa please stand up?
Tsukasa: -drops Elk and stands up-
Helba: -ahem- The Key of the Twilight has gone missing!
-everyone gasps-
Helba: That's right! We have determined that if we don't find the Key of the Twilight, The World will explode!
Balmung: -chickenifies and dances around-
Subaru: -stops beating up Ginkan, who has been dead for quite some time now- Explode?
Blackrose and Mimiru: Go boom? -they get pissed because they copied each other-
Helba: Yes, that's right. The World will explode, causing unrepairable damage to all connected servers and terminals.
Kite: You mean, its going to blow up my computer?
Helba: Yes, that's correct.
Mimiru: In that case, screw The World, i'm outta here! -attempts to gate out but fails- Huh?
Helba: For safety purposes, i have disabled everyone's ability to login or logout.
Blackrose: Well then, i could just try a hard reset.
Helba: I wouldn't. At this point, it could potentially put you in a coma.
Tsukasa: I... I... can't logout... -curls into a fetal position- ...can't logout...can't logout...can't logout.
Mistral: -drops mini-Piros- Whyyyyyyyyy did i have to come to The World today? (
mini-Piros: HARK! HARK!
Helba: Those who manage to find the Key of the Twilight will be rewarded with a.
Kite: -glances at Mistral nervously- Don't say it!
Helba: ...rare.
Blackrose: DON'T!
Helba: ...item.
Mistral: -spasms- rare item... -jumps up and down hyperishly- RARE ITEM! RARE ITEM! RARE ITEM! RARE ITEM! RARE ITEM! RARE ITEM! RARE ITEM! RARE ITEM! RARE ITEM! RARE ITEM! RARE ITEM! RARE ITEM! RARE ITEM! RARE ITEM! RARE ITEM! RARE ITEM! RARE ITEM! RARE ITEM! RARE ITEM! RARE ITEM! RARE ITEM! Natsume: -drowning- Excuse me, could someone help me, please? I think this armor is weighing me down and... gulp... -drowning noises-
Balmung: -dances like a chicken-
Tsukasa: can't logout...can't logout...can't logout.
mini-Piros: HARK! HARK! HARK!
Mistral: RARE ITEM! RARE ITEM! RARE ITEM!
Kite: -falls over- Please save meeeee! -twitch-
Orca to Bear: You know, we still haven't said anything.
Bear: At least I'm Orca.