Rat Race...Anime Style

Chapter 7

The Crazyness of it all. . enough to lose your heart!

Authors Moment: Hi yall! I am back! Since my other computers are being used for the moment I thought I take the time and use my new laptop to write a new fanfic chapter. I hope you all like it. And will someone, please read and review Myst Hina! I am going nuts here! Anyway, on with the fanfic.

Vash drove steadily down the road full of Lucy cosplayers. Things seemed to go smoothly, until a Lucy came up and said, "Everything is going fine right?" "Yep, can't go any better", said Vash. "How about a pit stop", asked the Lucy. "Sorry, this is a one-way flight", responded Vash, "There is a bathroom in the back you know." "But the latch is broken", said the Lucy, "Anyone could just come in!" "So, you don't have anything the other Lucys haven't seen", said Vash. The Lucy stared and said in a deep voice, "Not exactly." "GYAAAAAAAAAAH!" said Vash. "Stop screaming", said the Lucy.

Just as she said that they heard a 'moo'. They turned and saw a cow that was hanging from a rope hit the windshield. "AAAAAAAH", screamed everyone. Meanwhile you could hear a voice from above the cow scream, "Help me!" Soon, after Vash made a few twists and turns the cow got of the window, but then, one of the bus' tires hit a spike in the road and Vash had to pull over fast, getting onto a side. After stopping he but his head on the wheel in sadness, but what made it worse was that all the Lucys went, "WAAAAAAAAAAH!"

Minutes later, Vash was outside tending to the tire. One of the Lucy's came out and asked, "What are you doing." Vash groaned and said, "I am fixing the tire now stay on the bus." However the other Lucys started talk things over like, "Your supposed the change the tire every 300 miles", or, "Here let me help you." Vash was driving himself nuts trying to ensure them that he can do it himself. But then some Lucy's started running with another tire nearby. "No wait! That's the spare", yelled Vash. The other Lucy's noticing this started to run after the tire. But by then, the tire had gone so far down the hill, that they couldn't catch up to it. As Vash gave up his chase, he turned and saw the Lucy's where trying to raise the bus, but they ended up raising it too high that it fell over on its side. "WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH", they all went. Vash turned his head down in disgust.

The Burger Mobile was sailing fast down the road. Meanwhile, inside, Dexter was having a look of worry, Ed was just smiling, and driving along, and Excel was busy putting the heart back in it's bag. "Hey, look", said Excel, pulling something out of the heart, "All right, a nickel." "Cool", said Ed. "Just put it in the bag", whined Dexter. Excel was trying her hardest to put it in. She tried shacking it some but it flew out of the bag and out the window. Excel gave that look of surprise. "WHY", yelled Dexter. He forced Ed's foot on the breaks hard. "Um, Dexter, you hurt my foot", said Ed.

Soon Ed, Dexter and Excel where busy looking for the heart among all the weeds and shrubs. "We are dead", said Dexter, "We have been given a simple task and we blew it!" "Don't worry reckless citizen that delivers burgers", said Excel, "We will find the heart. Excel knows because Excel has lost her heart many times before!" "Woah", said Ed, "How did you live?" "ED", said Dexter, "She is trying to make a joke to help us to forget how screwed we are!" "Oh", said Ed. "Come on, let's check near the truck", said Dexter.

Suddenly a dog shows up holding a familiar red object. "Oh, hey doggie", said Excel and started patting it. "Dogs are so cute, and they make good meals!" She then took the object from it's mouth. "Oh what's this you got here", asked Excel. "Excel", said Dexter, "We need to find the heart, just get the dog out of here." "Okay", said Excel, "Okay go fetch!" She threw the red object and the dog ran after it. Then Excel noticed blood on her hand, and so did Dexter and Ed. It didn't take genius to find out that the object the dog had, was the heart. They all quickly ran after the dog.

That Man's car was being drove down the road at a fast rate. Inside, the Simpsons were enjoying the ride. "You know Marge", said Homer, "This really is a neat car." "Sure is", said Marge. "Look at the detailing, you have to admire the handiwork", said Homer. "Yep", said Homer. Then he noticed a cigarette lighter. "Hmmm, I wonder what this is", asked Homer. "I think that is a cigarette lighter", said Marge. "Nyaaah. The Japanese don't smoke", remarked Homer. "Oh yes they do", said Marge. "No they, OOOOOOWWWWWWWWWWWWW!" Homer touched it with his finger and burned it. "I told you", said Marge. As Homer held out the burnt finger, it caused him to look like he was making the 'finger' and unfortunately a biker was riding nearby. When Homer noticed this he pulled it in and Marge was trying to explain and when she was showing the finger Homer pointed out it was not helping. Homer then decided to make amends for this by talking to her. "Hey, that is a nice dyke, I mean bike." "Aye Carumba. You really blew it this time home-boy", said Bart. "She's summoning her fellow kinsmen", said Lisa. "Say what", asked Homer. "I mean, SHE IS CALLING THE REST OF HER GANG", yelled Lisa. "Oh, that's wha. . .", then Homer finally realized, "Oh no, their going to attack us!" Maggie hearing this, quickly got out of her car seat and hid underneath the seat.

As Homer said, the whole gang was beginning to bang and dent the car. "Kids, stay down", said Homer, "I don't know how to make it go faster!" Then a few smashes later, Homer said, "Are all of you insane? This is That Man's car." Suddenly the force of banging forced the cigarette lighter, which Homer left on the dashboard, flew right into his mouth, scorching his tongue. Another bash caused Lisa to accidentally let go of the glasses she found earlier, which flew out of her hands on landed a big bulls-eye on Homer's face. Soon, the bike group let up, because the car was about to crash into a auditorium. Homer put the breaks on hard, forcing the wig, that was left near the window, to fall on Homer's head, making him look like Ilpallazzo. "Homer", said Marge in a frightened tone, "Just quickly ask for help and have them call a tow truck!" Homer ran out, and discovered that they have drove onto a stage. Unaware of his new look, he went up to the podium and began talking, but, because of his burnt tongue, he sounded like he was speaking a different language, particularly Japanese. What made the situation worse was that the audience was a bunch of veterans during the war against ACROSS, like Pedro and Antonio. They all gasped at this. Eventually, they started booing him, especially after giving them the 'finger' to show it was burned. One of the crowd members, the well-known and amazingly popular, Nabeshin, took a gun out of his afro and fired at Homer, causing him to run and so did his family panicked.

Croquet was busily waiting in the room of the hotel. Soon there was a knock. He went to the door and on the other side was a very familiar looking dancer, who was tanned, had white hair, and was wearing a black top and a black bikini like bottom that was connected skin toned liners on her legs. She wore gloves and shoes that had red balls on them. "Miss Caldina, welcome." "Why thank you", said Caldina. "Are you going to let me in or are we going party out here in the hallway." "No, come on in", said Croquet.

"Nice place ya got here", said Caldina. "Oh it is not much, but I call it home", said Croquet, getting nervous. "So, where shall we begin." "Okay", said Croquet, swallowing a lump, "Hear me out first. First we both get naked." "So far so good", said Caldina, who was smiling. "Except we are wearing little sailor hats. Then we get into a Jacuzzi, filled with Pepto-Bismal. And I clip your tonails, and you shave my buttocks. How much would that cost." Caldina was shocked by all this and asked, "Come again." "In summery, naked, Jacuzzi, Pepto-Bismal, toenails, shave my buttocks", said Croquet. "Well", said a concerned Caldina. "Just tell me how much would it cost", said Croquet. "Well", said Caldina, "A party like that would cost about, 35,000 dollars." With that Maximillion Pegasus and his crew got out from their hiding places and Caldina was shocked. "All right, who had 35,000", said Pegasus. "Robotnik got 23,000 so he is the closest one", said Smithers. "Congrats Mr. Robotnik", said Pegasus handing the money over to Robotnik.

Dexter, Ed, and Excel were hot on the trail of the dog. As for the dog, it was hot itself, for it ran into a electrical fence, were it was killed. After seeing the fried canine, they took the heart from it's mouth. Dexter looked it over. "I think it is okay", said Dexter. Then Excel looked at it and said, "Excel wonders what these little hole things are. Do you think they are caused by being in that dogs mouth?" "No way, it was like that before, right Ed", said Dexter. "Uhh, no", said Ed. "Aggghh", said Dexter, "I can't go to El Paso with this." "Why, we have to", said Ed. "No, the guy is going to be alive for a few minutes then", he impersonated a flat line, then pumping the guy and then the flat line again. The crew stewed for a few minutes. "I got it", said Dexter, "A drifter." "A drifter", asked Excel and Ed. "Yes, we find a drifter, we kill him and cut out his heart. He won't be missed at all", said Dexter. "Okay, Excel is starting to get freaked out", said Excel. "Dude, you got a point! We will be fine", said Ed. "But where are we going to find a. . .", Dexter stopped in mid-sentence and noticed Excel. "Excel, where are you from", asked Dexter. "Dude, we need to find a drifter", said Ed. "Me, Excel is from F City, F Prefecture of Japan", said Excel. "Your family is back there right", asked Dexter. "No, both of my parents have died, long ago", said Excel. "Any family of any kind", asked Dexter. "No, I have only the secret organization of ACROSS." Dexter smiled, "ACROSS eh." "Yes, why. . .", then Excel noticed the look in Dexter's eyes. Pointing behind Dexter and Ed she yelled, "Look Excel sees a drifter now! Let's kill him!" With that she ran off. Ed looked and said, "I don't see em." Dexter groaned and said, "She tricked us let's get her!" "Oh, okay", said Ed. The two ran after Excel who was nearing train tracks, and a train just speeded past and Excel leapt through one of the windows of it.

Dexter groaned and defeat and walked over to the fence. Ed followed, he said, "Hey, cheer up Dex, at least we didn't kill her." And he slapped him on the back causing Dexter to hit the fence. He was sizziling a bit and Ed said, "Oh, don't worry I got ya." He pulled Dexter from the fence and Dexter turned to scold him when Ed pointed to the heart in his hand. "Dude, look, the heart." Dexter looked at the heart. To his amazement it was beating. With a smile of relief on his face he hugged Ed and said, "Thank you Ed!" and ran towards the Burger Mobile. "Dude, wait for me", said Ed running after him.

To be continued. . . .

Okay guys. I am sorry if I did a bad job at it, but I hope all of you enjoy it all the same. Until next time, see you in the future.