Disclaimer: I don't own X or any of its characters, if Fuma was available for sale, I would willingly take him for free! Also, I don't own Vast, or any of their (his) songs.
Me: I hope you'll enjoy this chapter, I added Subaru to the plotline; I hope I wrote him right. This is my first song fic, I hope I wrote it well! I have to add that I didn't watch "Tokyo Babylon", so if something I write doesn't quite match the story in that series, I apologize. The song I used is "Touched" by Vast. I'm actually addicted to this band right now (If you can call it a band, I read that the only constant member in the group is singer Jon Crosby), so I think you'll see more of their lyrics later on.
Chapter 2
Sorata and Erika passed the entire white corridor, and headed outside. They sat on a brown bench, near a fountain. In the middle of the fountain a statue stood in a shape of a seal. The seal was looking up to the deep blue sky, searching for something unknown. The two walked silently and for a few minutes, the sat on the bench, not saying a word.
Erika turned to Sorata, "You said you had questions, I guess patience isn't one of your main attributes."
Sorata smiled, "I guess so. Are we really in heaven?"
"Yes, this is my home, the only place I've ever lived in. It is here you'll eventually die."
Sorata was startled by the last sentence his new friend had just said. "Die? I thought what I did down there was to die!" He pointed with his finger down.
Erika remained calm, "That's what you've thought all your life, that's what everybody has been thinking, but here is where you'll eventually die. You probably wonder when is that going to happen, after all, this is heaven. Heaven was made for people who deserve to die calmly, after a good life of enjoyment and happiness. Sometimes earth can't provide people happiness when they deserve it, so when they die, they arrive here. When they reach the point when they are completely content with their lives, their soul finally rests in peace."
"What the…"
"Hell?" Erika giggled, "You see the horizon there? Where the sky's color is pink?"
Sorata followed Erika's finger, and saw a mix of shades in the sky. It was a dark pink with a little yellow. "I guess this is hell, so this is the place where people die when they are completely unsatisfied of themselves?"
"No, the game is the same there. Only the people there suffer a really long and tough battle to get to the point where they're happy. You probably wonder how people can be happy in hell. When a person accepts his wrong ways in the past, it opens a door for him, a door to another path: a path to pure bliss. But as you know, the road there is stiff. Let's say, there aren't a lot of people who die there, most of the people there grow up to be vengeful and aggressive, so they make the new people suffer like they did and even more, and it keeps going on and on and on. There's a story about the queen of hell, Natsika. She was a contract killer; she lived for the blood of others. When her terrified father discovered what his teenage daughter had been doing, he took out his gun and shot her at night. Her mother couldn't bare her death, and she killed herself. After the police arrived, they discovered the bodies, and when they handcuffed the father, he cut himself and died too."
"Lovely story…"
"Indeed. So the whole family went up to hell. After plenty of tortures, they turned to be violent and vindictive. Natsika used her knowledge from her past life, and with the help of her father, they conquered hell. The parents felt undefeated, the once fragile mother became a powerful daemon. But it wasn't for long. Natsika used her parents' insanity to her own benefit and murdered the two."
"Wait," Sorata interfered, "You said a person dies only when he's totally satisfied with himself."
"Yes, I did, and they were satisfied. They were crazy enough to think they were happy. People rot there, they yearn for their soul to be taken by the angel of death, but they can't reach the level of happiness. That's why it's such a dreadful place." Erika frowned; Sorata noticed the tone of her voice was weakening with every sentence. Her voice was almost silent now. "The battle between hell and heaven will begin soon, my mom told me that. Sometimes, late at night, or even in the morning, you can hear the terror and the cries of human souls from there. I don't know how this battle will end, no one knows, but I know I'll do whatever it takes to protect this place."
Sorata put his hand on Erika's shoulder. "And I'll be here by your side." He was surprised to see his friend's eyebrows raised in astonishment. "Erika, what's wrong?"
"No one, except my parents, has ever touched me like this."
Sorata sighed, "Don't worry, one day you'll have another person touch you like this, and when he'll do, you'll feel elevated."
"Like you felt with Arashi? The girl my mom talked about?"
Sorata made another sigh, "She took my higher than anything, If only I could see her."
"You'll have to be an angel to be able to watch her."
"Do you have anyone to guard?"
Erika grinned again, "No, I haven't found a person worthy of guarding yet. Karen is the one who decides which person will be under angel supervision, and she hasn't found the right human yet."
"I wish to be Arashi's guardian angel", Sorata said with great confidence.
"I wish I had someone to care for me, like you care for her." She lowered her head.
Sorata softly rested his hand on Erika's cheek, making her look into his eyes. "You will feel the same feelings I feel, because you deserve to. And when you'll meet that guy… or girl… you'll know what I'm talking about."
Kamui lied on his bed. Looking at the ceiling, his mind was filled with thoughts about his future. Karen's word echoed in his head, Kamui, I know you want to find Kotori, she is here, but to get her will be quite a challenge. He wondered what would be the challenge, why there should be a challenge; after all, he is in heaven. He pictured the moment he'll meet again with Kotori. He remembered her soft angel touch, and her meaningful words: The future is still undecided. She was right; he did change the world's fate, as it's lying now in Fuma's heart.
Fuma… Kamui always considered him as his brother; he loved him as a brother, and as his soul-mate. He felt sorry for all the memories he now shares with Fuma. Although Fuma didn't kill willingly, his mind must be filled with agony and guilt, his heart yearns for compassion and understanding, from anyone, especially from himself. Kamui wanted to talk to his soul-mate one more time.
The dragon of heaven got up from the bed and looked outside again. He felt like he couldn't stay in the palace much longer, he had to pursue his dream, to fulfill his wish. He watched the birds outside, flying from one tree to another, singing innocently. Apathetically, he turned around to exit the room. He didn't want to wait 'till the next day; he had to speak to Karen right away. He walked through the corridors, until he reached the room where he first met Karen. He didn't see her there, the two chairs were empty. Suddenly, he felt a hand squeezing his shoulder gently. "I knew you wouldn't wait for tomorrow" the empress of heaven said with laughter. "Shall we sit before we start?" Two chairs and a table appeared out of nowhere, and the two sat one in front of the other.
"I want to find Kotori." Kamui said confidently, his eyes were opened wide, showing a bright shade of yellow around his pupil.
"And you will find her; I can see it in your eyes – they burn with passion. You have to understand that the journey wouldn't be so easy. You need to know that the process wouldn't only involve you, but it will involve the man you love the most."
"Fuma!"
"Yes, your twin star. Your future is tied to his. His freedom depends on you." Karen quickly tossed her hand, stopping Kamui from reacting to what she's just said. "Listen carefully to what I am about to say. From the moment you were born, your destiny has been decided. Fuma's destiny has been decided. Your futures were bound by a knot that couldn't be resolved. That's the way it has been, and that's the way it still is now. You journey will start on a road called the road of the believers. When you'll reach its end, you will prove you got over your past, and you're ready for a new future."
"And how do I find that road?"
"I will lead you to it. To find the road would be an easy task, it's what ahead of you that will be a challenge. You will travel through every room in your heart, every cell in your brain which contains any kind of memory from your past. You'll live these memories once again, and once you prove you are able to overcome them, you'll finally reach your desired destination: The kingdom of angels, where Kotori lives now."
Kamui stood up. Determined, he put his hands on the table, looking deep into Karen's big red eyes, "I will overcome them, as long as I know what's waiting for me in the end."
"But you forgot something," Karen said with fallen eyes.
Kamui lowered his face, so he could see Karen's expression. He could understand from the look on her eyes, he wasn't the only one to go through memory lane. "Fuma…" He said with sorrow.
"He'll have to overcome every memory of yours, and you'll have to overcome some of his memories, as well as Kotori's."
"Fuma is strong, he's always been strong, but I don't know if he could face the horrors of his past."
Karen softly lifted Kamui's cheek with her hand. "There's one more thing you need to know, if you find Kotori, and pass every test, Fuma will be finally free from the Kamui inside of him, and he'll start living the life he always thought he'd live."
Tears started to fill his eyes. "Will I be able to see Fuma? Communicate with him so he wouldn't feel so alone throughout this journey? I won't start this venture, without his agreement. How would I know he's safe? How would I know if he got through his horrifying recollections? Will I be able to protect him?"
"You'll experience every memory together with Fuma, but you won't be able to communicate with him," A vague grin appeared on Karen's face, "but don't worry about his wellbeing, I know someone who will take care of him very well."
"So," Sorata said joyously while Erika and he were on their way back to the palace. "There's still a question I haven't had the change to ask you."
Erika walked with her hand on her cheek, trying to feel Sorata's touch on her skin. It was a strange feeling she has never felt before, and she craved for more of that. She looked at Sorata, they only met a few hours ago, and he managed to get inside her heart. "And what is this unanswered question?"
"Where's the dining room? I'm starving!"
Erika giggled. "Dinner will be served in a few moments," she opened the front door to the palace. "Let's see what's up with my mother first, I'm starving too, maybe she'll hurry things up in the kitchen."
They walked through the corridors, talking about everything, from Arashi to sea food, not leaving any detail unsaid. Sorata felt like finally he found someone to rattle with, Erika felt like she had finally found someone to communicate with. When they reached the royalty room, they found Karen and Kamui sitting one in front of the other. Karen greeted the two, and turned to her daughter, "Erika, you're exactly the one Kamui and I searched for…"
It was just another night in Tokyo. The warm wind of summer blew strongly, lights came from every house, making the night's light even brighter than the light of the day. No streets were empty, people moved from one place to another unstoppably. Subaru felt like he was the only one standing still. Every night he went to the "Kayuka" bar, it was the nearest one to his apartment. In the bar, he always ordered the same drink, and sat in the same sit, and every time he left the bar, he was alone. Many women were drawn to his mysterious charm, but they were always coldly rejected by him. Every night he came to the bar for the purpose of communicating with people, but it seemed impossible every time a man or woman approached him. Every time a person talked to him, he felt like he or she won't be able to understand the pain he's gone through.
This night wasn't any different. His black hair blew in the wind while walking toward the bar. Before entering he leaned on the wall, the same spot like every night, and lit up a cigarette. He decided to quit smoking, and he did, but the smell reminded him of his loved one, he always lit one up, smelled the scent, and then entered the bar.
When he entered, loud music came from every spot in the hall, but it didn't bother him. Music didn't attract him; the words have never seemed to get to him, at least until now. He walked passed the dance floor, and sat on his usual chair, near the bartender. He didn't have to say anything; the barman already knew what he wanted. There were several times when he tried to talk to Subaru, but Subaru kept his distance from him.
The song in the background reached its end, and a new one started. Subaru didn't know why, but he felt like listening to the lyrics, just this one time.
Touched,
You say that I am too
So much of what you say is true
I'll never find someone quite like you
Again
I'll never find someone quite like you
Like you
He finished his drink, he didn't feel like ordering another one, he wanted to get out. He left his chair, and walked through the dance floor again. He felt like the dancers surrounded him and were set to attack him. Like unrestrained prisoners, they started jumping and waving their hands in every direction. They yelled like a bunch of dogs, they looked like a group of cannibals, before cooking their poor victim. Subaru felt like he should make a run for it, and he did. Every smell of another person, every breath, every syllable, had suffocated Subaru; he had to get some fresh air. Outside there was no difference. People bumped into him, he felt like the earth was shaking beneath him.
He ran into a dark abandoned alley, and wiped his sweat from his forehead. He leaned on the wall with his hands. He took a cigarette out of his pocket and lit it. Ah, some fresh air, he thought to himself while sniffing the scent of Seishirou Sakurazuka. He started to feel heat running through his veins, and when he looked forward, he discovered a flame, burning the entire wall. It wasn't just the wall that burned; there was something in the middle of it. When Subaru got closer to the wall to take a better look, he found out that in the middle of the flame stood a tree. Subaru almost burned himself when he reached his arm to the tree; suddenly a figure came from behind it, deterring the angel of heaven. He was now face to face with the man he yearned to forget, but loved to remember. Seishirou smiled at Subaru, and in a second the flame was gone.
The razors and the dying roses plead
I don't leave you alone
The demi-gods and hungry ghosts of God
God knows I'm not at home
The angel of heaven rubbed his eyes; he took another look at the wall that had burned just a few moments ago. There weren't any signs of fire on the brick building, nothing. Subaru shut his eyes. It was the influence of the drink. It was just a dream.
I'll never find someone quite like you
Again
I'll never find someone quite like you
Again
When he got to his apartment, Subaru threw the house keys, and lied on his bed.He needed a good rest after all he has been through. He closed his eyes and at the same moment a bright green field appeared in front of him. He looked at himself and he wore his long white jacket and a black leather shirt.
"Subaru-san!" a voice came from behind him. He knew this voice very well. Hokuto Sumeragi ran toward her brother, and gave him a hug. She looked amazingly happy, Subaru noticed Kakyo behind her, looking happy as well. Hokuto gave her brother a big kiss on the cheek, and gazed at him. "I wanted to say that I love you. I hope you're doing fine, or at least you'll do fine. I know it's been hard for you, but please don't let the darkness take over you!"
Subaru gazed back at his sister's eyes. He always sank in her eyes to a place he always wanted to know: Oblivion. He wanted to forget all that has happened to him in the past few weeks, and just go back to the way things were. But as he turned away from his sister, he realized that she's not the reality and that loneliness is what's real.
I looked into your eyes and saw
A world that does not exist
As he turned back to his sister, she wasn't there anymore. Instead, a huge flame of red fire burned in front of him, burning his inside. He felt pain in every cell in his body; misery took over every single limb. He fell on the ground, with his eyes still looking straight at the flame. He saw it before, after he had left the bar. The blossom tree stood in the middle of the flame, but it didn't burn. He noticed that Seishirou was standing in front of him, he was smiling, but his smile wasn't as innocent as Hokuto's. He reached his hand to Subaru, and Subaru didn't resist. The blossom star pressed Subaru's body to his body, and now Subaru was inside the flame. He didn't feel anything; he didn't feel any pain or misery now: He felt loved and accepted. He couldn't think of a better place to be in, he wanted to stay this way forever.
I looked into your eyes and saw
A world I wish I was in
With their body so close, Subaru could feel Seishirou's heart beat. Seishirou rested his hand on Subaru's cheek, and leaned his lips on his. Subaru was surprised by his love's actions; he hadn't felt this way before. "I love you," he whispered to Seishirou, but he didn't answer to that, he just smiled, let go of Subaru's hand, and waved goodbye.
Subaru opened his eyes to see the blank ceiling of his apartment. Disappointed and upset of what he'd just dreamt, he got up and opened the cupboard which stood alongside his bed. He took a yellow box and spilled a couple of pills from it. The doctor said these pills will make him feel better after all the nightmares he has suffered. Subaru knew the doctor's words were nothing but false, but he liked the thought of feeling better for a few hours. He poured himself a glass of water, but he didn't get to swallow the pills. The sight of Hokuto and Seishirou alarmed him; he suddenly couldn't feel his legs. He crashed on the floor; the glass broke and scratched his forehead. A bit of blood dropped on the not so white floor.
"I wanted to say that I love you". He recalled Hokuto's words. He got up from the floor and opened the drawer next to him. "I hope you're doing fine, or at least you'll do fine". He remembered the sight of Seshirou's smile, the touch of his hand, the soft lips. He wanted to feel these things again. 'I know it's been hard for you", he took a knife out of the drawer and looked up at the ceiling. Both Hokuto and Seishirou looked at him from above. "But please don't let the darkness take over you!" He took another look at his loved ones, his heart was aching badly, but he ended it with one stab. As he was lying on the floor he opened his mouth to say the last words of the song he had heard in the bar, the words that got to him the most:
I'll never find someone quite as touched
As you
I'll never love someone quite the way that I
Loved you