Melphie 13
Disclaimer: Ok, all belongs to Tolkien except my four Orcs. Ok?
AN: More of my characters will be shown in this story, so just bare with me and I would like to know what you think. Special thanks, of course, to my editor and partner, Amanalda. Maybe someone has heard of her? Well, she's the best. Thanks Ammie! (she hates it when I call her that) :0D
Additional Author's Note: Listen, a few more of MY characters are going to be introduced in this chapter, and I just think that I should note that these characters are Tolkien's, but I grabbed them and switched their personalities around to suit ME!!! So if Tolkien sues me I guess I have it coming. So really, the characters belong to Tolkien, but their personalities are mine (and weird personalities they are!). So if anyone finds this idea offensive, (since some may think the characters are just plain weird and offensive) please do not read this story. You have been warned.
Chapter 2
And so, with that, (along with five minutes of heated debate) the Orcs finally put their rather unplanned plan into action.
"On the count of three..." Boss said softly, raising his dagger softly into the air, the other Orcs also readying their small, rather dull weapons. "One...two.. .three...CHAAAAAARRRRRGGEEE!!!"
At that rather unexpected cry, all the Orcs charged in like Wargs in a stampede, right past some very surprised Elves and heading straight for the building beyond, where the last Elf had disappeared inside with the scrolls.
Poor Figwit never knew what hit him.
"I GOT IM'!!! I GOT IM'!!!" Bugley sang happily, dancing around with his giant club in hand.
"Good goin' Buggy!" Slim congratulated, cautiously approaching the other Orc to pat him on the arm, but in return got a rather unnecessarily hard slap on the back from the bigger Orc, and being so thin and all...well...
He fell flat on his face.
Boss had already and immediately picked up the scrolls, unrolling them with the greatest of carelessness and eagerly pouring over the contents inside.
Or...he tried to at least.
"Oh, SHOOT!!!" He bellowed angrily.
"What?! What's wrong?!" Pugley asked right away, dropping his dagger and looking at the scroll too.
"This...this THING is written in that Elvish language!!!" Boss groaned, tipping in dismay to the ground and lying in despair. "It's...it's just incongruous."
"Uh...guys..." Slim said nervously, tapping Boss lightly on the shoulder.
"What?!" Boss demanded in complete rage.
"Erm..." The stick-thin Orc pointed up nervously to the rather angry- looking Elves that had surrounded them without them even knowing, all pointing their swords and bows at the rather dense things and glaring dangerously at them.
"Errr..." Boss got a bit nervous there. Looking around wildly for something to use, a part of his memory finally came back to him.
Turning quickly to Bugley, the strongest, he hissed in his harshest voice, "Bugley, the hostage!!!"
Bugley had to think for a moment, then at last he remembered and grabbed the unconscious Figwit, holding him up quickly in front of himself. "Uh, don't shoot or..." He looked over quickly at Boss for help.
Boss rolled his eyes and hissed quickly. "Or you'll kill him!!" He reminded harshly.
"Or you'll kill him!!" Bugley quickly repeated the moment the phrase had registered in his brain.
The Elves looked a bit confused at this.
Boss groaned heavily. "Or WE'LL kill him stupid!!!" He ground out angrily.
"Oh...we'll kill him stupid!!!" Bugley repeated immediately, getting slightly panicky at the look of the sharp...deadly...pointy...arrows that were getting closer to his rather large nose by the second.
Boss groaned again and put a hand over his eyes in despair. This just wasn't working.
Finally, one of the Elves spoke up to the four dismaying beings.
"You will release him or you will die." The first one threatened, drawing the string of his bow back harder.
"Ohhh, listen to the big boy!" Boss jeered, causing the three of his companions to gulp in nervousness. "Well, you make one move to do so and he dies!! Show em' Bugley!"
Bugley nodded vigorously and held up Figwit like a rag doll, trying to appear fierce and killing-like, but it didn't make him look anything more or less than stupid.
The Elves all glanced briefly at each other in confusion. In all of their fighting years, they had never seen any Orcs quite like this...
"Uh...can you let us go or something?" Slim finally asked meekly.
The reaction to that question was sensational.
They all got arrested.
~**~
Lord Elrond of Rivendell looked over the four Orcs in a bit of hate, a bit of disgust, a bit of surprise, and a bit of confusion.
A group of Elves had come from the inner city bringing the foul creatures, and asked right then for Elrond's judgment on the matter.
So far though, the most exciting thing that had been going on for the last ten minutes was...well...sort of a staring match.
The Orcs glared up at Elrond, and Elrond glared down at them.
A very intense fight, if I might say so.
Finally, at very long last, the thing that broke this rather uncomfortable silence was a loud and very unwelcome voice to Elrond's ears.
"Hello Pops!!!"
Elrond cringed. It was the one person who he especially did not want to see at the moment.
Aragorn.
The rather rambunctious Ranger came striding quite happily up to Elrond, as usual, and gave the dignified Elven Lord a hearty slap on the back. "What's new?" He asked cheerfully.
Elrond scowled darkly at him. Aragorn came often to visit at Rivendell, mainly because he just wanted to spend some time with Elrond's beautiful daughter, Arwen, and partly just to...visit.
But in Elrond's book, the disastrous Dunadan visited one time too many.
"I'll tell you what's NEW you Rotten Ranger!" He finally snarled into Aragorn's happy face. He pointed angrily to the Orcs. "THAT'S new!!"
Aragorn frowned and looked down at the glaring creatures. "Well...why don't you just kill them Pops?" He asked casually, leaning against a nearby fencepost.
The Orcs' glares immediately turned to expressions of panic.
Elrond groaned and shook his head. "Because!" He replied haughtily.
Aragorn raised a teasing eyebrow. "Because what Pops?"
Elrond rolled his eyes and crossed his arms over his chest stubbornly. "Just because!" He answered.
"Ah...so I see Pops." Aragorn said with a great big, sly smile. "Your vocabulary astounds me."
Elrond was seriously about to chop that guy's head off, just as his beloved daughter herself came out of the house.
"Father? Father what's the matter?" Arwen asked in her beautiful, sweet voice, walking gracefully to the older Elf's side. "Are you all right?"
Elrond had to smile at her. "Of course, my dear." He answered lovingly.
"OF COURSE SHNOOKUMS!!!"
Elrond groaned and pressed a hand to his eyes. Not again...
Sure enough, Aragorn charged madly from his place by the fence right over to the Elf maiden and nearly swept her off her feet in an adoring embrace. "What a fair chance that you should come out here into a world of such unworthiness!" The dramatized Dunadan gushed lovingly.
"Yes Aragorn...of course." Arwen replied uneasily, carefully prying herself from the squeezing embrace, unsure of whether her father would choose to let Aragorn off for that sudden display of love, or whether he would strike. She loved Aragorn, of course, but she also really did not want her father and her man fighting all the time.
Elrond was scowling darkly at the two of them. How could they have enough NERVE to do that in PUBLIC??! It was simply disgusting.
And he completely forgot about the four Orcs who had been left tied to the fence by the tired Elves that had brought them in...and had managed to escape their bonds and flee once again.
Ok, second chapter up. I bit shorter than the other one, but I didn't have much time to get this up. I was being chased by Orcs around the room with only a laptop cord to defend myself, and-*stops when hears Amanalda calling her to stop making up stuff* Ok, sorry.
You have now seen more of my characters! Now, as you might have observed, Aragorn is a bit odd. In my character, Aragorn is nothing short of the biggest teaser, pest, and nuisance to Elrond ever. I'll tell you what, right below here I'll quick give you a quick briefing on all my characters that will be in this story.
Orcs: (you know about them)
Elrond: A very wise and noble Elf...except when Aragorn is around. He hates that disastrous Dunadan with a vengeance, (since he is constantly tormented by him) but on the other hand loves his daughter to death, and wouldn't want to make her sad because he did something awful to Aragorn, (which he really wants to do) and he is really trying to remain sane over the whole thing.
Arwen: A very sweet, wonderful Elf maiden with a high, pretty voice and the sweetest personality ever. She loves Aragorn as much as he loves her, but also loves her father and therefore is usually turned to tears when they start fighting. She is a GREAT cook, she can sew, and she can sing very well. :0)
Aragorn: A carefree Ranger from around somewhere, takes to wandering the wilds for his home, but often makes stops at Rivendell to pay a visit to his beloved Arwen, and also to Elrond who he "affectionately" calls "Pops", much to Elrond's dismay. He loves tormenting Elrond all the time, especially at moments when Arwen is being sweet to him. One moment he will be a wonderful, noble, kind Man to anyone, a good king and a great future- husband to Arwen...and the next minute he will be the wildest, craziest, "evilest", most insane person ever...especially when it comes to Elrond.
Boromir: Aragorn's best buddy and a very nice Man to be around. He has some of the craziness that Aragorn possesses, but is much more disciplined and reasonable than that Ranger, always being kind and considerate, and also a great inventor. :0) When Aragorn and Elrond are fighting, he takes it upon himself to either drag them apart, or comfort Arwen while she's crying. (which she usually is on such matters) He's a really cool guy, and I have officially named him "The Gondorian Guy" for a nickname.
Gimli: A very vain, fat, stubborn Dwarf he is. He can be very, very mean at times, and also a very good warrior. He simply delights on tormenting others, especially Elves, (particularly Legolas) and getting approval from his over-exaggerate father. Very full of himself and stubborn, the Dwarf can prove quite a match in a fist fight.
Gloin: Gimli's father. Just like his son. What's more to say? He will do anything to give his son back up on what he does, waaayyy over-exaggerating as he does. He takes pride in every little nasty thing Gimli does, babying him at the slightest scratch and doing some tormentings of his own. Quite a nasty pair they are!
Legolas: Prince of Mirkwood, and a good friend of most of the others in their little group. (all of my characters occasionally all gather together for a little reunion in Rivendell, at Elrond's house of course) He has a particular disliking for Gimli, as the Dwarf does for him, though who wouldn't after all Gimli's tormentings? Quiet and outspoken, noble and mischievous, there are really two sides to the Elf, and it is normally the more playful, fun side that his friends look forward to seeing in him.
Gandalf: Ok, now unlike probably a lot of the other fanfics you have seen, this wizard is immensely dumb and thinks very highly of himself. I mean it! Compared to all the other wizards in Arda, this is by far the stupidest one. He gets mixed up and confused about just about everything, his worst fear is fire and often faints at the sight of his own magic...so in other words he doesn't use his own power a lot. It scares him to death, though it's pretty easy to scare that Istar to death around those parts.
Well, that's about it for now! I'll get the next chapter up as soon as possible. See ya'll next time! Oh, and by the way, sorry for the half- cliffie. :0)
P.S. THANKS TO MY FIRST REVIEWER!!! I felt very uplifted and encouraged when you reviewed my chapter, and I'll get the next chapter up as fast as I can. Thanks! :0D (Thanks SO MUCH Katie. I owe ya' one)
Disclaimer: Ok, all belongs to Tolkien except my four Orcs. Ok?
AN: More of my characters will be shown in this story, so just bare with me and I would like to know what you think. Special thanks, of course, to my editor and partner, Amanalda. Maybe someone has heard of her? Well, she's the best. Thanks Ammie! (she hates it when I call her that) :0D
Additional Author's Note: Listen, a few more of MY characters are going to be introduced in this chapter, and I just think that I should note that these characters are Tolkien's, but I grabbed them and switched their personalities around to suit ME!!! So if Tolkien sues me I guess I have it coming. So really, the characters belong to Tolkien, but their personalities are mine (and weird personalities they are!). So if anyone finds this idea offensive, (since some may think the characters are just plain weird and offensive) please do not read this story. You have been warned.
Chapter 2
And so, with that, (along with five minutes of heated debate) the Orcs finally put their rather unplanned plan into action.
"On the count of three..." Boss said softly, raising his dagger softly into the air, the other Orcs also readying their small, rather dull weapons. "One...two.. .three...CHAAAAAARRRRRGGEEE!!!"
At that rather unexpected cry, all the Orcs charged in like Wargs in a stampede, right past some very surprised Elves and heading straight for the building beyond, where the last Elf had disappeared inside with the scrolls.
Poor Figwit never knew what hit him.
"I GOT IM'!!! I GOT IM'!!!" Bugley sang happily, dancing around with his giant club in hand.
"Good goin' Buggy!" Slim congratulated, cautiously approaching the other Orc to pat him on the arm, but in return got a rather unnecessarily hard slap on the back from the bigger Orc, and being so thin and all...well...
He fell flat on his face.
Boss had already and immediately picked up the scrolls, unrolling them with the greatest of carelessness and eagerly pouring over the contents inside.
Or...he tried to at least.
"Oh, SHOOT!!!" He bellowed angrily.
"What?! What's wrong?!" Pugley asked right away, dropping his dagger and looking at the scroll too.
"This...this THING is written in that Elvish language!!!" Boss groaned, tipping in dismay to the ground and lying in despair. "It's...it's just incongruous."
"Uh...guys..." Slim said nervously, tapping Boss lightly on the shoulder.
"What?!" Boss demanded in complete rage.
"Erm..." The stick-thin Orc pointed up nervously to the rather angry- looking Elves that had surrounded them without them even knowing, all pointing their swords and bows at the rather dense things and glaring dangerously at them.
"Errr..." Boss got a bit nervous there. Looking around wildly for something to use, a part of his memory finally came back to him.
Turning quickly to Bugley, the strongest, he hissed in his harshest voice, "Bugley, the hostage!!!"
Bugley had to think for a moment, then at last he remembered and grabbed the unconscious Figwit, holding him up quickly in front of himself. "Uh, don't shoot or..." He looked over quickly at Boss for help.
Boss rolled his eyes and hissed quickly. "Or you'll kill him!!" He reminded harshly.
"Or you'll kill him!!" Bugley quickly repeated the moment the phrase had registered in his brain.
The Elves looked a bit confused at this.
Boss groaned heavily. "Or WE'LL kill him stupid!!!" He ground out angrily.
"Oh...we'll kill him stupid!!!" Bugley repeated immediately, getting slightly panicky at the look of the sharp...deadly...pointy...arrows that were getting closer to his rather large nose by the second.
Boss groaned again and put a hand over his eyes in despair. This just wasn't working.
Finally, one of the Elves spoke up to the four dismaying beings.
"You will release him or you will die." The first one threatened, drawing the string of his bow back harder.
"Ohhh, listen to the big boy!" Boss jeered, causing the three of his companions to gulp in nervousness. "Well, you make one move to do so and he dies!! Show em' Bugley!"
Bugley nodded vigorously and held up Figwit like a rag doll, trying to appear fierce and killing-like, but it didn't make him look anything more or less than stupid.
The Elves all glanced briefly at each other in confusion. In all of their fighting years, they had never seen any Orcs quite like this...
"Uh...can you let us go or something?" Slim finally asked meekly.
The reaction to that question was sensational.
They all got arrested.
~**~
Lord Elrond of Rivendell looked over the four Orcs in a bit of hate, a bit of disgust, a bit of surprise, and a bit of confusion.
A group of Elves had come from the inner city bringing the foul creatures, and asked right then for Elrond's judgment on the matter.
So far though, the most exciting thing that had been going on for the last ten minutes was...well...sort of a staring match.
The Orcs glared up at Elrond, and Elrond glared down at them.
A very intense fight, if I might say so.
Finally, at very long last, the thing that broke this rather uncomfortable silence was a loud and very unwelcome voice to Elrond's ears.
"Hello Pops!!!"
Elrond cringed. It was the one person who he especially did not want to see at the moment.
Aragorn.
The rather rambunctious Ranger came striding quite happily up to Elrond, as usual, and gave the dignified Elven Lord a hearty slap on the back. "What's new?" He asked cheerfully.
Elrond scowled darkly at him. Aragorn came often to visit at Rivendell, mainly because he just wanted to spend some time with Elrond's beautiful daughter, Arwen, and partly just to...visit.
But in Elrond's book, the disastrous Dunadan visited one time too many.
"I'll tell you what's NEW you Rotten Ranger!" He finally snarled into Aragorn's happy face. He pointed angrily to the Orcs. "THAT'S new!!"
Aragorn frowned and looked down at the glaring creatures. "Well...why don't you just kill them Pops?" He asked casually, leaning against a nearby fencepost.
The Orcs' glares immediately turned to expressions of panic.
Elrond groaned and shook his head. "Because!" He replied haughtily.
Aragorn raised a teasing eyebrow. "Because what Pops?"
Elrond rolled his eyes and crossed his arms over his chest stubbornly. "Just because!" He answered.
"Ah...so I see Pops." Aragorn said with a great big, sly smile. "Your vocabulary astounds me."
Elrond was seriously about to chop that guy's head off, just as his beloved daughter herself came out of the house.
"Father? Father what's the matter?" Arwen asked in her beautiful, sweet voice, walking gracefully to the older Elf's side. "Are you all right?"
Elrond had to smile at her. "Of course, my dear." He answered lovingly.
"OF COURSE SHNOOKUMS!!!"
Elrond groaned and pressed a hand to his eyes. Not again...
Sure enough, Aragorn charged madly from his place by the fence right over to the Elf maiden and nearly swept her off her feet in an adoring embrace. "What a fair chance that you should come out here into a world of such unworthiness!" The dramatized Dunadan gushed lovingly.
"Yes Aragorn...of course." Arwen replied uneasily, carefully prying herself from the squeezing embrace, unsure of whether her father would choose to let Aragorn off for that sudden display of love, or whether he would strike. She loved Aragorn, of course, but she also really did not want her father and her man fighting all the time.
Elrond was scowling darkly at the two of them. How could they have enough NERVE to do that in PUBLIC??! It was simply disgusting.
And he completely forgot about the four Orcs who had been left tied to the fence by the tired Elves that had brought them in...and had managed to escape their bonds and flee once again.
Ok, second chapter up. I bit shorter than the other one, but I didn't have much time to get this up. I was being chased by Orcs around the room with only a laptop cord to defend myself, and-*stops when hears Amanalda calling her to stop making up stuff* Ok, sorry.
You have now seen more of my characters! Now, as you might have observed, Aragorn is a bit odd. In my character, Aragorn is nothing short of the biggest teaser, pest, and nuisance to Elrond ever. I'll tell you what, right below here I'll quick give you a quick briefing on all my characters that will be in this story.
Orcs: (you know about them)
Elrond: A very wise and noble Elf...except when Aragorn is around. He hates that disastrous Dunadan with a vengeance, (since he is constantly tormented by him) but on the other hand loves his daughter to death, and wouldn't want to make her sad because he did something awful to Aragorn, (which he really wants to do) and he is really trying to remain sane over the whole thing.
Arwen: A very sweet, wonderful Elf maiden with a high, pretty voice and the sweetest personality ever. She loves Aragorn as much as he loves her, but also loves her father and therefore is usually turned to tears when they start fighting. She is a GREAT cook, she can sew, and she can sing very well. :0)
Aragorn: A carefree Ranger from around somewhere, takes to wandering the wilds for his home, but often makes stops at Rivendell to pay a visit to his beloved Arwen, and also to Elrond who he "affectionately" calls "Pops", much to Elrond's dismay. He loves tormenting Elrond all the time, especially at moments when Arwen is being sweet to him. One moment he will be a wonderful, noble, kind Man to anyone, a good king and a great future- husband to Arwen...and the next minute he will be the wildest, craziest, "evilest", most insane person ever...especially when it comes to Elrond.
Boromir: Aragorn's best buddy and a very nice Man to be around. He has some of the craziness that Aragorn possesses, but is much more disciplined and reasonable than that Ranger, always being kind and considerate, and also a great inventor. :0) When Aragorn and Elrond are fighting, he takes it upon himself to either drag them apart, or comfort Arwen while she's crying. (which she usually is on such matters) He's a really cool guy, and I have officially named him "The Gondorian Guy" for a nickname.
Gimli: A very vain, fat, stubborn Dwarf he is. He can be very, very mean at times, and also a very good warrior. He simply delights on tormenting others, especially Elves, (particularly Legolas) and getting approval from his over-exaggerate father. Very full of himself and stubborn, the Dwarf can prove quite a match in a fist fight.
Gloin: Gimli's father. Just like his son. What's more to say? He will do anything to give his son back up on what he does, waaayyy over-exaggerating as he does. He takes pride in every little nasty thing Gimli does, babying him at the slightest scratch and doing some tormentings of his own. Quite a nasty pair they are!
Legolas: Prince of Mirkwood, and a good friend of most of the others in their little group. (all of my characters occasionally all gather together for a little reunion in Rivendell, at Elrond's house of course) He has a particular disliking for Gimli, as the Dwarf does for him, though who wouldn't after all Gimli's tormentings? Quiet and outspoken, noble and mischievous, there are really two sides to the Elf, and it is normally the more playful, fun side that his friends look forward to seeing in him.
Gandalf: Ok, now unlike probably a lot of the other fanfics you have seen, this wizard is immensely dumb and thinks very highly of himself. I mean it! Compared to all the other wizards in Arda, this is by far the stupidest one. He gets mixed up and confused about just about everything, his worst fear is fire and often faints at the sight of his own magic...so in other words he doesn't use his own power a lot. It scares him to death, though it's pretty easy to scare that Istar to death around those parts.
Well, that's about it for now! I'll get the next chapter up as soon as possible. See ya'll next time! Oh, and by the way, sorry for the half- cliffie. :0)
P.S. THANKS TO MY FIRST REVIEWER!!! I felt very uplifted and encouraged when you reviewed my chapter, and I'll get the next chapter up as fast as I can. Thanks! :0D (Thanks SO MUCH Katie. I owe ya' one)