When Somers Turned to Black
Chapter 6: Lady Lana
Disclaimer: We do not own Harry Potter. Fortunately, we don't own the movies either. We hereby declare J.K. Rowling the official writer of these magnificent books, and compare our work measly to hers. We don't own A Knight's Tale either!
A/N: Hi everyone! Sorry for our extremely long absence. First it was final exams and then it was vacation. So, sorry if anyone's angry. Okay back to the story. We used a little thing from A Knight's Tale in here so we're disclaiming it. We had to put it in here because (Christine) watched it and loved the red-haired guy and thought his craziness might add a little somethin' somethin' to the story. To all our reviewer Muah, Muah, and double Muah! If you are reading this story it is your obligation to review! Bwahahahaha! No really, please review!
"Hey, Evans," James called out insolently. "How was your vacation? Do anything interesting for a change?"
Sirius stifled a laugh as Lily turned around sharply and sent James a piercing glare. She started to walk towards him but Raven grabbed her arm and pulled her towards the dormitory steps.
"They're not worth it," Sirius heard her mutter as they started to climb the stairs. As the girls disappeared, James turned to Sirius.
"So... Sirius. What do you think Raven is going to do when she finds out? There won't be much of you once she's through."
"When Raven finds out?" Sirius asked. "I'd be worrying about Lily's Irish temper if I were you! She's going to rip you to pieces!"
As if on cue a horrible shriek emanated from the girls' dormitories.
"POTTER!"
James cringed and Sirius started to laugh nervously. The boys heard more curses coming from the rooms, followed by piercing screams. They jumped up from the couch and made a beeline to their dorms.
"Stop right there Black," a hoarse voice screeched behind them, as they reached the stairs. They turned slowly to face a group of girls covered in multicolored slime. Underneath the mess Sirius could make out the infuriated faces of Raven, Lily, and the two other 5th Year Gryffindors who were unfortunate enough to be staying in the same room. James smiled beseechingly at the two other girls, one he recognized as Mary and the other, a Beater on the Gryffindor Quidditch team.
"Sorry Joan. I forgot you were in Lily's dorm," he said apologetically, as he watched her face turn an angry shade of red.
Other students stopped and looked curiously at the girls covered in goop. Soon a crowd had formed, encircling the eight Gryffindors.
"Black!" Raven yelled making him face her. Sirius watched as purple goo dripped from her black hair. "I will...pound..." he shrunk back as she gestured wildly and yelled with a crazed voice,"...beat...flog...pain! Lots of pain!"
He crept back to the stairs as she stepped towards him still wringing her hands and staring wildly into his eyes.
"Raven," Sirius said, smiling nervously as she advanced closer. "It was just a joke."
"You destroyed our room," she muttered between gritted teeth. "First there came this goop, and then the snapping trunks. You oversized all of my clothes. And then...shrimp...so many shrimp!"
"S...See," Sirius stuttered, as he was forced up against a cold, stone wall with Raven's enraged face three inches from his. "Just a j..joke. Shrimp are funny. G..get it?" Sirius looked pleadingly over Raven's shoulder towards James but found that Lily had cornered him while Remus and Peter were shrinking back from Joan and Mary.
Sirius suddenly felt a swift smack strike his cheek.
"Ouch! That hurt!"
"Good," she said fiercely. "I hope that'll make you remember to leave me the bloody hell alone."
She turned abruptly and sped towards her dormitory staircase. Sirius slumped back against the wall and watched a James was punched hard in the eye, Peter was kicked roughly in the shin, and Remus got a violent blow to the stomach by Joan. The girls followed Raven up the stairs, soon disappearing out of sight. The crowd dissipated, breaking into groups and whispering about the encounter.
Sirius rubbed his sore cheek, as James walked over to him covering his eye.
"I suppose we deserved that one mate," he said ruefully slumping against the wall next to Sirius. Peter limped over to them making horrible grimaces with each step.
"But I don't think we fared as bad as Remus over there," Sirius said, looking at the crumpled form of his friend who sat helplessly on the floor.
"It wasn't fair," he said painfully. "She's a Beater! I didn't stand a chance!'
"We know," James said sympathetically. "It should've been Sirius who took on Joan. At least it would've been Beater on Beater! And this whole thing was his idea in the first place, so he should've been the one to get hurt the worst!"
"My idea!?" Sirius cried angrily. "My idea!? It was you who thought up that whole shrimp thing and the one where all their clothes..."
"Come on," James said, as he walked over to Remus. "Let's get him upstairs."
James lifted Remus under an arm and Sirius stalked over angrily and carried him by the other one. They lifted him up and stumbled up the steps to their dormitory.
####
James, Sirius, and Peter sat in the Great Hall eating their dinner (Remus had said his stomach still hurt and couldn't make it down). Sirius cringed as jeers floated across the dining hall from the Slytherin table.
How could they find out about this already? he thought to himself.
"Potter! Beat by a girl!"
"Yeah, look at his eye! He's got a nice shiner!"
"I heard Lupin got hurt so bad he can't get out of bed! He always seemed like a wimp to me!"
"And they all got beat by girls in their own house!"
Sirius looked down the table to see Lily and Raven struggling to hold back laughs.
"Now they're not acting so tough!"
"I wish I would've been there to see it! I bet they all cried like babies!"
Sirius watched a James's fist clenched and his face became an angry red.
"Just leave it," Sirius said, grabbing James's arm. "We'll get them later when the teacher's aren't around."
####
"No Sirius! I will not come watch you at the Quidditch final," Raven yelled as she yanked her thin wrist out of Sirius's firm grasp.
"But why not? It's not like you have to do homework or anything. You don't need that role of parchment for McGonagall's class until next Friday. That's almost two weeks away," pleaded Sirius.
"Yes, but I really don't want to come see you. Do you know why? Because I hate you Sirius! I hate you!" she screamed loudly, her blue eyes gleaming with fury.
Sirius jolted upright in his four-poster bed, Raven's voice resounding in his head. His white t-shirt clung to him, dripping in salty perspiration. His fingers trembling, Sirius pulled apart the hangings that enclosed his bed and stood up.
Sirius tip-toed down the winding staircase to the common room. He dragged a large, squashy armchair up next to the burning embers.
What is wrong with me? he thought. I can't even sleep anymore without thinking about her. Hmmph... there I go again. I've never thought of anyone so much in my life.
The tattered blue journal kept flashing across Sirius's mind. His brain replayed the sound of the golden clasp clicking open as James unlocked it carelessly. The crisp sound of the pages being ruffled through...
I can't tell James I've seen my name. The crazy bloke will bug me until I decide to bloody kill myself. Maybe I didn't even see it. I was probably just over-tired from Quidditch practice. O.W.L.'s too. McGonagall's really been piling on the homework lately. Ughhhh... I have got to get my hands on that bloody journal. Maybe I can find it and burn it or something... After I read it. But, how come James didn't notice my name? I could've been hallucinating... Naaah.
"Oh bugger," he croaked tiredly. Sirius silently made his way across the empty common room and stood behind the Fat Lady's portrait.
She really is making me go crazy, he thought before walking out of the warm and comforting common room and into the chilly hall. He pulled out his wand and carefully counted the stones from the top, left-hand corner of the Fat Lady's portrait, and roughly pushed in the right one as he said the password briskly.
"Fizzing Whizbees!"
The secret passageway opened up, revealing a dark, looming stair. Sirius paused before slowly ascending. At the landing, he looked around and than proceeded stealthily towards the fifth years' room. His hand quivered as he slowly reached for the large, silver doorknob. His shaking fingers grasped it and turned. He pushed the door open swiftly and let out a sigh of great relief when the room remained silent, as if undisturbed. Sirius crept into the dark room, shutting the door quietly behind him. His eyes scanned the room until they fell upon a familiar looking trunk at the end of one of the girls' beds. He walked slowly over and opened it. Sirius winced as the lid creaked.
"Ha Ha Hamph!"
Sirius muffled a laugh as he glanced over the trunks' contents. Piles and piles of Lady Lana's Body Firming and Toning Lingerie littered the bottom.
Hmmm... I guess this is definitely the wrong trunk. Must be Mary Mickettle's. I always wondered what was in all of those parcels her boyfriend sent her over breakfast, he thought as he squinted around the room, still grinning broadly.
Ha! That has got to be it.
Sirius got up and walked across the room towards an almost identical trunk to the first one.
Well, I can see how I got these mixed up.
Sirius yanked at the lid, but it didn't give.
Damn it, Sirius thought impatiently.
"Alohomora," Sirius said, waving his wand at the iron padlock that kept Raven's belongings secure.
Sirius yanked at the lid a second time, but it wouldn't budge.
Hmph... I should've known that spell wouldn't have worked. This is the girl that studies charm books for fun. Who puts a lock on a trunk in their own dorm anyway? Just because it was ransacked once.
Sirius grinned slyly as he thought back to all of those pranks they had set up.
It was worth it, he thought. Even though we'll be hearing about it for months from the Slytherins. Beat by girls... Ah, oh well. I guess I'd lock my trunk too, if I knew I was going through my stuff. But, there still must be a key around here somewhere.
He got up and walked along Raven's bedside to her nightstand.
Where did they put all those shrimp anyways?
As Sirius passed Raven's bed, he could just make out her face through a part in the velvet hangings. She wore a taunting half-grin and her eyebrows were raised.
She's probably dreaming about how hot I look flying on my broomstick.
He looked away and pulled open the drawer of her nightstand. As he ruffled through the noisy odds and ends as quietly as he could, he felt an indentation in the wood. He pushed forward and a wood panel slid back to reveal a small compartment about one inch deep and three inches wide as well as long. Inside was a small iron key. The top was shaped into a heart. Metal ivy weaved through it.
Ha! thought Sirius. I guess she's not so smart!
He snatched the key and returned to the trunk at the foot of Raven's bed. Holding his breath, he slid the key into the padlock and turned it counter- clockwise. A gratifying click resounded in the silent room, and Sirius waited a few seconds before removing the key and gently pulling off the iron padlock. Setting it on the floor, he opened the trunk slowly. Thankfully, it didn't creak.
Okay, great. Now, all I have to do is look through her stuff without it looking like I looked through her stuff, Sirius thought as he stared down at piles neatly stacked books and clothes.
Handy Holiday Cooking Tips, No. Friendly Charms and The Perfect Time to Use Them, No. A Guide To... No. How can all of this reading be healthy? His heart skipped a beat as he glanced a bit of blue.
It figures, Sirius thought. It had to be at the bottom of the pile, didn't it? Oh well. At least I found it.
Sirius stacked all of the books back into their piles and shut the trunk. He picked up the lock and secured it back in place before he stood up to return the key. He tucked the journal into his robes, as not to lose it on the way back to the common room. But, before Sirius could successfully close the drawer of the nightstand, he knocked over an alarm clock from the edge. It clanged noisily to the floor before Sirius could catch it.
Bloody brilliant, mate. Now you've done it.
Sirius bent to pick up the alarm clock and place it back on the stand. When he looked up, he met a pair of glaring blue eyes.
"What are you doing here?" Raven whispered murderously. "Haven't you caused enough destruction already?"
"Just checking to see that you were all safe of course. You know, after your dorm is ransacked, you should be a little more cautious," Sirius said sarcastically.
"Oh sod off, Black," Raven countered maliciously. "I'll hit you again if I have to. Where is the rest of your gang of twits? Have you come to do more damage?"
"Well, I don't know any twits. Besides yourself, of course. I'm not here to do damage. I've already humiliated you enough."
"If you haven't noticed, this is the girls' dormitory. You're not allowed in. Unless you are missing certain manly parts, you shouldn't even be near the girls' staircase, let alone in the bedrooms," Raven sneered.
"I was just leaving, so I'll be out of your way in just a few seconds," replied Sirius with the same evil sneer.
"I can still report you," said Raven.
"Well, I know you won't, you didn't last time. And even if you did, you have no proof. No one else knows I'm here."
"I don't ever want to see you, Potter, Lupin or Pettigrew anywhere near me or Lily again. We're both sick of you and..."
"Leaving!" Sirius cut in. "Have a nice night. Sweet dreams," Sirius said spitefully, as he shut the door behind him and started down the staircase.
Back in the common room Sirius returned to his squashy armchair in front of the fire and studied the journal. The blue cover was well worn and had started to peel. The gold clasp wasn't very shiny and the pages were brittle. He undid the clasp and opened the journal to the inside cover. Printed neatly in the center was a name, and inscription.
Raven Somers
To our loving daughter on the day she
was born. May you keep this diary and
let out your most deepest thoughts and
feelings. In times of anger, unleash your
fury, and in times of happiness, shine light
on a dull page.
With Love,
Matthew and Vivian Somers
Hmmm... Raven Somers. I never caught her full name. I guess I'm always too busy arguing with her to care. At least her parents sound like decent people. Mine will never understand anything. They'll always discriminate anyone who is different from them.
Sirius turned his thoughts back towards the journal and looked at the first page. It was full of old drawings. He flipped through until he reached a recent section.
Sept. 1
I had time to write before boarding the Hogwarts Express. I'm at Kings Cross Station. Mother and Father are so happy to be seeing me off. I know they are proud. I will still miss my old school. I hope to feel at home when I arrive at Hogwarts. Well, time to say goodbye. I can write on the train later.
Blah, Blah, Blah, thought Sirius. He skipped ahead a few pages and began to read again.
...That Sirius Black is absolutely the most wretched, stupid, arrogant dolt I have ever met in my life. So much for a nice first week at a new school. I miss my friends at my old school. I'm so glad I met Lily Evans though. She has been wonderful at helping me find my classes and all. And, she's the only other person I know who's read A Guide on Uncommon Incantations and How to Use Them. She's quite smart and I can learn a lot from her. The only downside is that when she's around that Potter boy, she's not to pleasant. I wish those boys were more persistent in their schoolwork than in bothering us. Black, Potter, Lupin and Pettigrew complete the gang of stupidity. Oh well. I'll continue later. It's getting awfully late.
"What!" Sirius said out loud.
We aren't that bad are we? I didn't think so. She's just jealous that we're so popular. She only wishes she had three great friends like mine. Evans doesn't count for anything, so that leaves... hmmmm... no one. Really... Well, I found my name anyway. Maybe I could show Potter. He's in it too. I should probably read it all first though. Of course, if he asks how I snatched it without getting caught... I can't show him. Then I'd have to tell him Raven caught me, and I would end up bludgering him in the head. He would never leave me alone.
Sirius skipped ahead a few pages until he spotted his name again.
Dec. 7
I swear! Black definitely needs to let his head shrink about five sizes before he ever talks to anyone. He is completely and utterly arrogant, and thinks he is above everyone and everything. The only sad thing is, if he shrinks his head, he would shrink his nothingness of a brain too. And we couldn't have that. Just today, Sirius came up to Lily and I while we were skating. Of course he wouldn't be complete without his cohorts in crime, Potter, Lupin and Pettigrew. He decided to tell us to leave the area because the lake wasn't big enough for all of us. I guess that's true, seeing as his ego barely fits by itself.
Sirius slammed the journal shut before reading anymore. She obviously had nothing better to do than to write slanderous entries about him.
Well, enough is enough for one night, he thought. It's really late, I'm tired, and I don't feel like reading about how terrible I am any longer.
Sirius got up and walked back up to the fifth years' dorm. He shoved Raven's journal under his pillow and jumped under his covers. Before closing his hangings, he glanced at the sprawled, drooling figures of his three best friends. At least he was well-liked by someone. Even if they all were crazy, slobbering gits.