The Barbie Girl World
An Inuyasha Fiction by StarFoxRocks
Author's Note (Please Read): Okay, there's a lot of explaining to be done. I discovered scripted stories aren't allowed (I still think that's BS) and my first BGW fic was deleted. I've been revising so it won't be deleted for that reason again. So, the person that reported me last time (you know who you are), back off.
Also, if you haven't read the original BGW, just go along with the story. You'll get what goes on in this strange, strange land soon enough.
Inuyasha, Kagome, Miroku, Sango, and Shippo were sitting by a fire. They were discussing random topics, as usual.
"So, I was wondering when Barbie herself would be making an appearance," Miroku muttered.
"Who cares about Barbie?" Inuyasha asked.
Miroku responded, "Well, that is what the name is based off... right?"
"Remember, in the original story, you fought Naraku over this place?" Kagome asked.
Inuyasha laughed. "Oh yeah! That was fun."
"But we all died!" Shippo yelled.
"So? We came back," Miroku pointed out.
Shippo blinked. "Oh."
"Won't this be weirder in a story format?" Sango inquired.
"Probably," Miroku said. "It could become long and boring."
"I doubt that!" Shippo said.
"I shall assist," said a voice.
They all turned from the fire and looked around.
"omg! Who was that?" Inuyasha asked.
"Me!" The voice said again.
"Show yourself!" Sango demanded.
The voice hesitated. "Um... I can't! I'm just a spooky voice! Oooooo!"
"Shut up, you're just teasing!" Shippo declared.
"Liar," the voice breathed.
"You're the liar! Get him, Inuyasha! Sic 'em, boy!"
"Excuse me?" Inuyasha said. "I'm not a mutt you can boss around-"
Kagome gave him a push. "Shut the hell up and get him!"
Inuyasha sighed. "Fine..."
He jumped to the top of the cliff and looked around.
"Nothing up here..."
"Check the cave!" Sango called.
"Do it yourself!" Inuyasha yelled back.
Miroku and Sango walked into the cave that was located at the bottom of the cliff. As they walked in, the voice was heard by all again.
"You can't ever find me!" it taunted. "You'll just get lost and die in there! Because I'll avalanche and go ghetto on your arses!"
"Ghetto this!" Miroku yelled.
He threw his staff. It fell harmlessly to the ground.
"That was great..." Sango said sarcastically.
"So what?" Miroku shrugged. "It was ghetto."
"No it wasn't!" the voice made a very daring comeback.
"How was that daring?" Kagome mused.
Shippo shrugged. "Beats me. I'm gonna have some coffee. Wanna come?"
"Sure!" Kagome said, but couldn't because the physics of time and space wouldn't let her. The set her afire until she froze solid.
"Kagome!" Inuyasha yelled from atop the cliff. "What happened?"
Suddenly, the cliff began to collapse, while Inuyasha was still on it. He screamed like a girl as it fell to the ground and blocked the cave entrance, trapping Miroku and Sango and killing Inuyasha, while raising an unfairly large amount of dust into the air.
Shippo blinked.
"Aha! I have done it!" the voice said cheerfully. "Now I can go home and have cookies while going on an all night anime fest. So long, suckers!"
There was a loud whooshing noise and then silence. Shippo stood awkwardly by the large pile of rubble that had concealed what used to be his friends.
"Well, they're all dead. Now what?" he asked himself. "I guess the story ends now. But that would make it too short... there has to be more to do."
Koga, Sesshomaru, and Naraku appeared.
"Yes, it worked!" one of them said.
"Which one?" Shippo questioned.
Find out yourself, midget.
"I'm not a midget!" Shippo yelled. "I'm just a little kid fox demon!"
No, you're not. You're really a Mexican Midget who had rabies and conveniently long teeth in certain places.
Note: I'm not being racist while writing this, I just thought that sounded weird so I added it in.
Shippo's voice grew deeper. Suddenly he had a beard and a strange moustache.
"NOOOO! MY SECRET IDENTITY!" he screamed.
"Caught in the act!" Naraku yelled, pointing dramatically. "You're the culprit we've been looking for!"
"Uh... what about that guy?!" Shippo asked, pointing at snoopy.
Snoopy glared. "Hey, pal, leave me outta this."
"You're coming with us!" Koga yelled.
"No way!" Shippo protested with a sign. "I'm not going with!"
"Yes, you are!" Sesshomaru said menacingly. "Now come."
"No!"
"Yes!"
"No!"
"Yes!"
They continued their argument, wasting a lot of space. So, we'll just skip the next thousand minutes.
Oh yeah, and to tell a bit more of the setting, they had crossed a bridge that was a few feet away from the campsite Inuyasha and Co had been. The bridge was crossed to avoid falling into the cliff. On the other side was a square shaped land surrounded by more bottomless pits, with a concrete square pad in the middle that people often mistook for a basketball court.
"Yes!"
"Alright, those last thousand minutes of yelling made me tired..."
Sesshomaru died of the lack of oxygen forming in his lungs from yelling so much. He got testicular cancer somehow and his heart exploded.
"What the f-word?" Koga said, looking at Sesshomaru's now disturbing form.
"You can say fudge," Naraku said. "Nobody minds."
"No, the other word..." Koga said shyly.
"Oh... peaches?"
"Y- no! That doesn't even start with an f!"
Shippo suddenly lied. "I'm a real boy!"
"Yeah, whatever," Naraku ignored him. "Was the word flag?"
"No..." Koga nervously replied.
"Fang?"
"Stop!" Koga demanded urgently. "You'll get is kicked off the air!"
"But we're in a book," Naraku pointed out.
"Not even that! Some online display thingy! They could cut us off!"
"So what?"
"So what!? We'll cease to exist until the next chapter is made, and who knows how long that'll take!"
"My god!" Naraku said. "That sucks!"
"Yeah, so stop!" Koga pleaded.
Shippo, meanwhile, drank some beer and eventually died of boredom and alcohol poisoning.
After that, Jaken showed up and ate his corpse. Then he walked over to Naraku and Koga.
"Hello, gents!" he said. "So, where are the- OH MY GOD!!! Lord Sesshomaru!"
He waddled over to Sesshomaru's form. "What have you done to him?"
"Nothing, really," Koga replied. "He just kinda died."
"How?!" Jaken demanded to know the facts.
"I don't know, I forgot."
"How did you-"
"OMG!" Naraku cut in. "He's having an attack of explosive amnesia! I'll help him!"
He grabbed a wheelchair and shoved Koga in it. Then he pushed it over the cliff edge.
"Why did you do that?" Jaken asked.
"I dunno," Naraku admitted. "I just wanted to kill the bastard."
"We're lacking in characters now," Jaken observed. "How do we fix that?"
"By doing this!" Naraku answered.
He did nothing. He stood completely still.
'Um..." Jaken looked at him. "Stop that. You're scaring me."
Naraku didn't stop. He just stood there and stared at Jaken.
"P... please? Cut it out..."
But Naraku did not cease his staring. Staring with those eyes. Those eeeeeevil eyes.
"Stop it!" Jaken began to shout. "Please! No more!"
But stop Naraku did not! He just stood as still as a statue, staring with unblinking eyes! Why did he do so?! Why did he torture Jaken with horrible black pits for eyes?!!?
Jaken went insane in a matter of minutes and cast himself down the bottomless pit, never to be seen again. Except for a future chapter, maybe.
Naraku suddenly moved.
"Teeheehee!" he giggled. "That was so fun!"
Myoga suddenly appeared and sucked his blood like a vampire. He sucked so much blood from Naraku, that Naraku began to deflate until he was a pile of skin and clothing on the floor that could make a good rug.
Myoga grew really fat. He couldn't move.
"Um... help?" he called. "I can't move... hmmm... maybe I'll roll!"
He made himself roll around on the ground, giving childish yells while doing so. But then he crashed into a mime that appeared out of nowhere and they both fell down the cliff into the dark bottomless pit.
Meanwhile, in the cave, Miroku and Sango were sitting silently.
"Well, in a few more minutes the oxygen will be sucked from the cave and we'll both die horrible deaths," Miroku muttered. "Can you think of anything to do until then?"
Sango pondered. "No, not really. Nothing we could do anyway, all I can think of would take more time than what we've got left."
"We could try getting out of here!" Miroku said. He stood and walked over to the rubble that was blocking them and punched it. His hand fell off.
He moved his arm and observed the stump. "Well, that failed."
"We probably need a large boomerang-shaped object to pummel it apart," Sango suggested.
Miroku got an idea. "Hey! Why don't we use your boomerang?"
"The what?"
"The boomerang-shaped object."
"Oh yeah!"
She raised her boomerang and whacked the rubble. But all that did was break it in half and send one of the halves at her head, and the other at Miroku's head. They both suffered major head injuries and then died with that and the lack of oxygen combined. So that brings our chapter to an end!
End of Chapter One