10.

Snapes attempt part 1

Professor Snape had devised the most absolute and perfect love potion. Perfect for his needs, at least. It caused the recipients to not only fall madly in love with each other, but thanks to an impregnation of Veritaserum...it also caused them to declare this love loudly, and frequently to anyone and everyone. Without Dumbledore's knowledge, Snape had tested the new potion on two sixth year students, who were now very much engaged...

Of course he couldn't attest to the durability of the serum...it might simply fade away in time. But so did un-assisted love, sometimes. It didn't matter to Snape; he only needed it to last long enough to help him win the pot of gold. He simply had to win it; it had been so long since he had joined in any frivolities, that this seemed entirely too much fun.

He enjoyed especially the challenge of the whole idea. No petty match making plans, this was a simple, exact potion. Perfectly measured for both of his victims. In fact it was perfectly formulated to only work for it's intended victims, which had been difficult to accomplish, but at least he didn't have to worry about one of them attaching onto the wrong mate. shudder Not when he had to work in such close proximity to both of them! And if anyone else accidentally imbibed of the brew? They would probably trip through life as blissful as if they had just drunk ten rounds of fire-whiskey...and the hangover would be much worse.

As for that, there had been a small matter of how to administer the draught to his exact victims. With Lupin, it was perfectly easy...he had only to disguise by combining it with the wolfsbane potion; making sure that it did not go into immediate effect. However...Ms. Granger's potion was more difficult.

She was more difficult...ever since that nasty accident with the canary creme, she had been very careful of what she ate and drank. It took him almost a week to find the solution to his dilemma.

On a Monday, during lunch,and when he was positive that Ms. Granger was at the ministry, Snape apparated to her flat, and with a sadistically sly smile, he injected a syringe full of the love philtre directly into a small pitcher of cream that he found sitting pristinely in her refrigerator. Just to be certain that she received enough, he also placed some into all of her water taps.

Satisfied that Ms. Granger would indeed, be vocally in love after three days, he returned to Hogwarts, the phial of faux ' wolfsbane potion ' for Lupin and apparated to Grimmauld place. He smirked to himself thinking of how, after the little monthly episode, Lupin would be exhausted...and for some 'mysterious reason' suddenly prone to bouts of poetic verbal lovemaking. How sweet, Snape thought with a sneer.

How definitely, and undeniably...sweet. Revenge always was.

However, he found the house to be empty, and after a few moments of impatient foot tapping, he gave up hope of seeing Lupin in person. He sat the phial on the kitchen table, with a note specifying the contents, in an accusatory tone, and hastily apparated back to the grounds out side of Hogwarts, with a few minutes to spare before he had to teach his next class.

The thought of winning the gold was not nearly as satisfying as the thought of humiliating not only his old childhood enemy, but also Miss-Insufferable-Know-It-All-Granger, the brains of Harry Potter's golden trio. What could possibly, on this great earth, be any funnier than that?

" What's this"? asked Fred, taking hold of the delicate green glass bottle.

" Looks sinister. Maybe someone was thoughtful enough to leave us some poison?" George laughed. " Wait, here's a note..."

" Oh...Snape's Wolfbane potion...for Lupin."

" Told you it looked sinister..."

" Say, George..."

" Yes Fred?"

" The most amazing thing is happening"

" What's that Fred?"

" In idea...young and tender as spring weed...is germinating in my mind."

" Sounds poetical, and intriguing. Anything I might like to know about, Fred?"

'' Yes, George, I believe you might. For you see, I have here..."

" In your hand..."

" A bottle of Wolfsbane potion..."

" For One Remus Lupin..."

" Who cannot refuse to drink it...

" Lest he change into a werewolf..."

" So therefore...if we were to, say...play with it..."

" Just the tiniest bit?"

" Oh of course..."

" Then we might?"

" Quite possibly, with our two genius' combined, create a potent...

" And mind-boggling...

" LOVEPOTION" they said simultaneously.

" Why George, aren't you as clever as I ?"

" And you Fred, are as brilliant as me..."

" So that means,...''

'" That we..."

'' We are invincible.''

" Let's take it upstairs right away. I believe I know exactly what to do."

'' Lead the way..."

" Oh, mum! I'm glad you came over..." sad Hermione, opening her front door to allow her slim mother to enter the tidy flat. She threw her arms around the older woman, and hugged her in a rare display of childish affection.

" That is what mother's are for. Now, now, what is the matter?" Mrs. Granger looked suddenly worried.

" Easy.. mum, it's nothing that urgent! I just...wanted to talk with you. If...you have the time?"

" All the time in the world, love!"

" Great...would you like tea? I can make some...and I have some cake..."

Mrs. Granger eyed her daughter with suspicion, but silently accepted the new and unfamiliar wave of hospitable domesticity that Hermione was displaying. She allowed herself to be seated, listening to Hermione's chatter about her friends, and the few events that she felt it was safe to share, about hr work at the ministry. Even though Hermione's tone was bright, there was a nervousness behind it that Mrs. Granger had not seen since her daughter was a small child.

She watched as Hermione filled the kettle with water...setting it a little too awkwardly on the burner before turning to set a plate of sponge cake on the table. ( In her mental preoccupation, she did not even consider her mother's usual disapproval of sugary foods)

" Did you make this?"

" Yes...I haven't been sleeping very well, lately, so I am teaching myself to bake. From scratch, with no magic! " Hermione grinned as if this were a great joke. It didn't fool her mother.

" Why haven't you been sleeping?"

" A great variety of reasons are to blame, I suppose..." Hermione opened her refrigerator, and when her mother wasn't looking, she sniffed delicately at the cream to assure herself it hadn't spoiled. She might be learning to bake, but she still detested shopping...and sometimes the food tended to turn to the dark side behind her back.

The cream was perfect though, so she set it on the table. " For one thing, this flat is too noisy. You know, I believe the people next over skip rope all night? And somewhere there is a baby that simply won't stop crying. And I..."

" Yes?"

" Well, I concentrate so hard at work, that it get's caught in my mind, I guess. Can't sleep then because I am still working...even when I'm not..." Hermione poured tea in her mothers cup...but decided at the last moment to have a butterbeer herself. She always kept a few bottles on hand. " really, I thought you would have outgrown those tendencies..." her mother laughed." But...I suppose you will always throw yourself entirely into whatever task you seek to undertake. Could you pass that cream, please?"

"Well, at least I am trying to learn new methods of diversion, " Hermione said, then she frowned thoughtfully. " But...unfortunately, I get just as involved in my relaxation techniques. I can't simply bake, like you used to do...it has to be just right, or I can't be satisfied. Then I start worrying about it..."she trailed off, waving her hand in the air as if to say '' see, silly girl am I!"

" But you didn't want me to come all of the way over here...just to tell me that."

" Nooo...I rather wanted to ask you a question...and...what's the matter? Is the tea too strong?''

Mrs. Granger had a queer look on hr face as she sipped from her cup.

" Not at all! In fact, it is delicious. Now what question did you want to mask ee? I mean, ask me, excuse me."

" I wanted to know something about...love."

" Really Hermione? That is so wonderful!"

" What is, mum?"

" The fact that you want to ask me anything at all. You have no idea what that means to me..." she gave a slight giggle, and poured herself another cup of tea. "Now, what do you want to know about love?"

" Well...actually, I was just curious...as to how a person could be sure that they were in love..." Hermione watched as her mother drained the second cup, and poured another.

" Really Hermione, this tea is just too good...you should have some."

" No thank you."

Mrs. Granger giggled again, rather spontaneously. " You don't have to be so polite you know...I am only your mother. See...I'll be rude..." she reached across the table and picked up a finger-full of cake, totally defying convention and shocking Hermione.

" Mother! Are you all right? Feeling okay, I men?"

" Chertaindly, why to you ashk?"

" You seem a little drunk."

" Nonsense. I haven't dropped a touch. And I'll tell you something else..." she giggled" The only way to know if you love man, is to sleep with him."

" Mother!"

' I don't mean to embarrass you, but ish the truth...you can't know until them...then, I mean. Is it getting hot in here? And if you don't know it then,.. then you haven't been slept with rightly, understand? And at your age, you ought to see more men. At your age... at your age...how old are you again?" Mrs. Granger put her hand to her forehead.

" Twenty-six...what do you mean how old am I?

" Twenty-six? You are aren't you? All growing up. "

" What does that have to do with it?"

" Well at your age, I had lovers you know..."

" I don't want to know..."

Mrs. Granger drained her fourth cup and ate another piece of cake. She pointed a finger at Hermione, and swayed slightly

" You should know. We never had a girl to girl talk...have we? But I have to say, that there was a man...before your father... no, I was twenty four...Two years younger than you. But I didn't love him..." she shook her head sadly. " That was the last cup of tea...do you think we should make shome more?"

" No..."

" I din't love him, because to tell you a shecret...he had the smallesht little prick and no idea of how to use it" And she burst into a peal of giggles...laughing hysterically'

" Mother! Really, I am trying to ask you a serious question, and you...you...Are you okay?"

Mrs. Granger suddenly turned a funny shade of pink, and without another word, she slid out of her chair, hitting the floor with a loud thump.

A little panicked: Hermione rushed into the bathroom and wet a cloth with cold water. When that failed to revive her mother fully, she whipped out her wand and levitated her into the shower, where she turned a full spray onto her.

The coldness of the water did indeed revive her somewhat, but there was no doubt in Hermione's mind that her mother was intoxicated.She had often seen that same behavior in Ron and Harry after their weekend jaunts...but she could never recall her mother having imbibed anything stronger than the occasional glass of wine.

She wondered suddenly, if perhaps Ron and Harry had not decided to attempt to lighten her mood by spiking something in her kitchen. Something her mother might have gotten hold of. Their words came back to her..." One day, we just might decide to help you, Hermione love...That's right, 'Mione, we could really help you, you know. And one day...we might..."

" Those...idiots!" she exclaimed aloud. "What have they done this time?"

" Whoshe that done what Mione?"

" Nothing...let's get you home, I suppose. You need to rest."

" I can't I am all weth, and my tea cup is empthy again.''

" That is a relief. Now come on, try to stand, let's get you home."

" Canth I stay here with you? I like you, you know..."

" Yes...I know. But I think perhaps dad is the best person to handle this..." She said as kindly as she could. She was trying to stay mad, and not laugh at the how funny it was suddenly that her mother was wet, drunk,...and singing.

" And when I find Harry and Ron...I promise to hex them blue..." she sighed.

Mrs. Granger opened her mouth and drank out of the shower spray. " Mmm, I was thirsty! You could at least get me some more tea..."

" Maybe when we get home. "Hermione turned off the shower spray, and helped her mother out, and onto her feet. It was only a stumble and a stagger out to the car. She didn't trust herself to try magic at this particular moment...not and risk another accident, mixing it with her friends mischief might be dangerous.

Hoping that her neighbors were not looking, she stuffed her limp mother into the passenger seat, and climbed behind the wheel.

" Well, so much for that idea..." she said ,and started the motor.