Not much to say about this chapter. I'm not proud of it, because like I've implied before, this is basically me ripping off Huminshou. But please enjoy the many different things that I parody within the text. I hope that everyone can catch them all.

However, there is a general parody throughout the whole story about American/Western fan-fictions that take place in Japan. Many writers try to put the boys into very western situations that just don't make sense with Japanese culture. Most of the time, anime-fans (or otaku, I guess to parody this situation further) seem to equate Japan with one of these few things; doujinshi, instant noodles, sushi, and plushies. It really says a lot about the western way of thinking. Some people think that merely by learning a few casual Japanese phrases, they suddenly look like pros on Japanese culture. So, keeping all of my little satirical moments in mind, that should make Mischief 101 a far more entertaining work, beyond the relationship of Yusuke and Kurama.

By the way, do not forget about my Universe challenge! If you are taking the challenge, please post in my forums. There have been several views but only two replies to the challenge, so I know people are reading the rules!

Disclaimer: Yu Yu Hakusho © Yoshihiro Togashi.

Mischief 101

By Zelia Theb

VI: Glitter

Kurama woke up sweat slicked and shirtless in Yusuke's arms…well, almost. Yusuke had just set him down on his bed, before crawling into his own. The clock near them read three. Three in the morning. Their red digital numbers were taunting him through the darkness, making him question their display.

"What?" Kurama sat up suddenly, palms flat down upon his bed, "Three?"

His roommate sat up, and laughed at him, "Yeah. Three. I was kinda wondering where you'd been all night, so I tried to see if I could sense your energy…"

"Where I had been?" The redhead's confusion only made him seem that much more adorably uncharacteristic, and Yusuke laughed again.

"I dunno what kind of fumes are in the dark room, buddy, but you were knocked out cold. It's a good thing I found you too, because you were in the middle of removing your pants. I don't know why. Mighta been that weird thing you do now and then."

The fox could have been mistaken for a drag queen then, as rouge horribly stained his face. Then again, whomever could have identified the makeup in the dim moonlight from the window would have to be a cat, or at least have night-vision.

"I'm sorry, Yusuke, I must have been…dreaming."

"You can say that again. But at least it wasn't as bad as the time I woke up with your underwear on my chest." Again, more rouge; as Kurama couldn't remember doing that either; "Eer. But I didn't say anything to you and instead just kinda threw 'em back on your bed."

"Wait a moment, Yusuke," Kurama interrupted him. It was becoming rather warm in there for him, "You're not playing some sort of horribly cruel joke, are you? I think that I would remember falling unconscious in the dark room. My dream was far too vivid to be but a figment of my imagination."

"Your dream? Well, what did ya dream about?" The teen then folded his legs and propped himself up by his elbows on his knees, eagerly listening for the story.

"It seems far too predictable that something of that nature would be but a dream," Kurama began. Oh, but it was but a dream. The forces in charge had decidedly chosen to parody the dream cliché, figuring that it would be incredibly amusing to fool one as astute as the legendary and wise Youko Kurama.

"I'm waiting."

Kurama sighed, "Well, I dreamt that I returned at about one. I had gone to the dark room against my better judgement because I was angry with my reaction to Kino. I'm certain you'll discover soon enough…but he had stopped me after my photography earlier today and tried to forcefully seduce me. He found himself tied up soon after."

"Sweet! We're gonna be so dead when Koenma finds out about this!" remarked Yusuke, overjoyed. Though he was disturbed at the thought of Kino attempting something so vile, he didn't want to ruin the interesting story. He was showing self-composure; and it had rubbed off on him from a certain Shuichi Minamino.

"…Well. As I said before, I had returned here at one. And I proceeded to tell you what happened…Wait. Yusuke, are you certain that you aren't fooling me?"

"Um, no, Kurama. I don't get why you think I am?" He shrugged, putting emphasis on his strange statement-question.

"Well, you told me that…it was "cool", because you were glad that I didn't let…" the flush boy was interrupted.

"Kino walk all over ya anymore?"

"NO!" Kurama gently scolded, a bit agitated that he couldn't finish his tale, "I apologize. That isn't what you said. You said…" Another classic sentence trailing occurred; Kurama was now regretting scolding Yusuke for his assumption.

"Ya already yelled at me," Yusuke pouted, "So ya better tell me what I said!"

"You said that you were glad I didn't let Kino steal my innocence." There, he said it. Anxiety swelled within him, soon crushed by the firm and cold barriers of the wondrous silver-haired fox-spirit within.

Yusuke smirked, again, not able to be seen in the pale light, and agreed, "Yeah. I'd say that. So then what? You told me to stop smoking, or something, and then I tickled you because that's what I do when it looks like you've got yourself wound too tight?"

"In a sense, I suppose." The redhead looked disdainfully away. He had his heart set on the fact that perhaps he had opened up enough to accept a kiss from the other boy, and even after learning the truth, he knew that it must have been a dream, because he could not bring himself to just go through with it now. That, and he might have had morning breath.

The detective picked up on the disappointment in Kurama's words, and inquired, "You suppose? What's up?" He clambered out his sitting position and over the gap into Kurama's bed, supplementing his soft words with a display of physical concern.

"It is nothing, Yusuke," Kurama brushed off, laying down on his side, "I was just shocked that I wasn't able to discern between a dream and reality. That is all." A frown took over the black-hired boy's face. He didn't understand why something so small could bother Kurama enough for him to actually show that he was bothered.

The Spirit Detective lay himself back down in his own blankets, and whispered, "The difference between reality and dreams, Kurama, is that dreams have things that people are afraid of in them. They have fantasies too." He stopped to exhale; "You might have just wanted a human reaction. You stuck up for yourself and we are going to get in trouble, but you wanted me to make it seem like it was okay. Does that make sense? Maybe I'm rambling and should just let you sleep." He closed his eyes, adjusting his head into the groove of his pillow, and muttered, "Besides, being a head-doctor doesn't really fit me well. Just ignore me, I guess."

For several moments afterward, all that the teen could hear was Kurama's steady breathing, and he had assumed that he had fallen back asleep. However, once he was nearly induced by slumber himself, Kurama whispered in response, "I know that I did not dream of that kiss."

The two boys hadn't spoken to each other all day. Kurama had left for classes early, not only in an attempt to avoid Yusuke in case he had heard the confession of the dream, but because he wanted to obtain his developed photographs from the dark room.

Yusuke, on the other hand, was nearly late for his first class. He was tired, having only gotten an hour of sleep due to said confession. There were forces within him, angsting, seeking the truth of both their feelings by replaying the past over and over again. Such forces that the Universe wished to squash, as it was not in a dramatic nor angsting type of mood. So, during the test that he had to take during his first class, he had zoned out into a light slumber. Waking up five minutes before the test was to be completed (to be more precise, a test to measure his aptitude with General Science), he raced through it, only to have it handed back to him disappointedly by the teacher at the end of learning hours that day. Though, he had accomplished one thing (that wasn't a complete failure) for the day during his lunch period.

Back to his extremely failed test, he agitatedly came back to the dorm to find Kurama curled in his bed with a manga entitled "Strawberry Licorice" in his hands. He quickly closed it when Yusuke tossed the papers onto his bed, and asked, "What's wrong?"

As he tore his school uniform from his body, replacing it with flannel pajama bottoms and a white tee shirt (much to Kurama's inner delight), he answered, "Tell me how I failed that thing! I thought I was doin' good this time around!" It was true; Yusuke was still faring as good as he was the day he entered the boarding school. This test threatened that integrity.

"Okay, I will leaf through it," Kurama offered, picking up the stapled packet and browsing through the incorrect answers. Green descended upon the first red mark, and harrowed in for the explanation.

"Shoot," Yusuke requested, sitting Indian style after jumping with a slight plop onto Kurama's bed.

"Question two," the fox cleared his throat, "It asks, 'What color is the sky, and why?'. The real answer is choice a, with 'Blue, due to the way Earth's atmosphere breaks the white light of the sun', which is actually far simpler than an in-depth scientific answer. You answered c, which stated, 'Blue, because it matches my eyeshadow'."

"They both said blue!" Yusuke whined.

"…Right. On to question five." The studious one scanned his eyes quickly over the text, and then read, "The question is about human reproduction. It asks you where the male genitalia must be inserted in order to ensure conception. The real answer is obvious, but you chose answer d, which is…" His lips curved upward; "…The anus."

Yusuke was absolutely pink with embarrassment.

"And then here," Kurama pointed at a section of the test in which the student would choose from a list of words and fill them into the correct sentence of the paragraph, "You've completely jumbled this up."

"Whaddya mean? It's all biology and all of those words are plant words, aren't they?"

"Yes," the redhead agreed, "But they need to be in the correct order. For example, this sentence incorrect; 'The pistil is an extension of the rose's stem, which pricks those who try to handle the rose;' as is this one; 'The stamen pushes forth into the node;' a statement which is actually speaking about the roots, not the male reproductive part of the flower. Goodness, this whole portion of the test makes me ashamed to be your friend!" (1)

"Why?" Yusuke exclaimed, "Is it 'cause I don't know roses that well?" Kurama nodded, but Yusuke insisted, "Well, I'll tell ya that I happen to like roses a lot. In fact…" He leapt off of the bed and rummaged through his school items on the floor, and pulled out a folded piece of paper, "I drew this today during lunch." He handed it to him, and Kurama unfolded it…

…Revealing a breathtakingly beautiful drawing of a rose, with lineart that consisted of both thick and thin lines, and light shading. He set down the test for good, and noted, "This is amazing, Yusuke."

The ex-delinquent sat back down next to Kurama, and explained, "I drew it for you today, because you were really weird last night. I figured that you could get it inked on to you when I take you to that tattoo parlor tonight."

Being as lost as he was in the remarkable gesture, he almost missed the fact that Yusuke had insinuated they were going against curfew and getting tattoos later on.

"Pardon?"

"Oh yeah, it's all good. I knew a guy that actually wasn't afraid of me and wouldn't start anything a while back. He said that he'd give me a free tattoo if I ever wanted one, and he's just down the street from the school. I want us to go tonight, because I think it'd be fun. Plus we could show them to Hiei and Kuwabara." Yusuke rubbed his hands together deviously, "Yeah, Kuwabara would be really jealous! Hah!"

"This skin artist wouldn't happen to make me immobile if I allow him to do his work, would he?" his ally joked, recalling the rather arduous and bloody fight he had during the Dark Tournament.

"Nope."

"Okay, Yusuke," Kurama smiled, tucking the paper into a pocket, "I'd be honored to display your work."

"On your skin," the artist added.

"On my skin."

"So…" Yusuke eyebrows flittered up and down excitedly, "Where are ya gonna get it?"

"So ya want it on da left cheek, or da right?"

"He wants it right there, a little above the left, right…here."

"Right…there?"

"Yeah, it'll look pretty smokin' right…there…right?"

"I want it on the right side, not the left," Kurama finally interjected. He had been laying down, naked (aside from some conveniently placed sanitary sheets) on his stomach, propping his head up on an pillow of folded arms. He was tired of having Yusuke and his friend (or to put it more precisely, an old man who seemed to be an ex-biker turned Temple-caretaker; long beard and all) prod at him and his buttox every time they said, "Right…there".

"You wanted it on the right, Shuichi?" the detective asked, puzzled as to how he mixed up his left and right. Placing a finger deep into the mainly muscled flesh near his right pelvic bone, Yusuke added, "Here?"

"Yes, there." The fox's face lit up red again; normally being exposed among the same gender wasn't so bad (it was Japan, after all), but Yusuke poking at him near a place that he recently discovered that he desired Yusuke to…poke…him in was definitely bad. Naughty. So naughty, that Shuichi Minamino had wondered if the pain of the needle would be able so squash the ache that was metaphorically drilling a hole into the tattoo table.

"Ok, here we go," the scruff voice of the even scruffier man announced.

Watching Kurama's face contort in pain, he remarked, "I gotta say man, that's a pretty neat place to get it. It's like…"

"Ah!" he suddenly cried out.

"Sorry, wasn't payin' no attention," the grody Asian biker apologized.

After a most enjoyable story of how Yusuke had acquired such a 'delightful' acquaintance, Kurama had successfully gotten through the painful (and surprisingly unbotched) inking process. Insisting that the two friends leave the room, Kurama also managed to redress himself with little embarrassment, and apply his own anesthetic courtesy of the Demon World and a little thing called aloe.

They returned home once Yusuke had received the very same tattoo (except he chose the left; he knew there was a reason that he kept insisting Kurama have his there). And once there, the detective was adamant about seeing Kurama's tattoo for the second time.

The redhead lifted the waistband of his pants slightly away from his skin; as he wanted to show some modesty. He questioned, "Is it bad?"

"No. It looks pretty damn good." Better than good. Tasty. Very tasty. Yusuke had to sit down. After all, it was time to bring up a more serious matter, and think about how to show off his ink to Kuwabara later.

"Kurama? D'ya think…" Kurama eyed him, prying into what he might say, and his nerves gave out on him; "…Think that maybe the girl's will go wild for you now?"

"Perhaps," he smiled, placing himself next to Yusuke on the bed, "However I don't wear the type of clothing that would permit them to see it." The detective chuckled; it was quite possibly the silliest question he could have ever asked. It was obvious, after recalling all of their past missions, that Kurama always covered up, no matter what, and that he never had time for girls.

"Damn, and I was looking forward to seeing some more hot Kurama ass." Had the redhead been drinking anything then, he would have choked and spit the liquid back out. But he wasn't, thankfully. Yusuke's bed covers wouldn't have appreciated that so much.

"But seriously," Yusuke continued, tossing his anxiety out the window and off-campus, "How was it?"

"Excuse me?" the long-locked boy asked. That had done it; their dormitory had a serious problem with their heating vents, or so he chose to believe. Being a teenager was difficult.

"You know," Yusuke explained coyly, "What was the kiss like? Damned if I don't know what's going on, but it must have been one hell of a dream for you to get so down about it."

Kurama stayed silent.

Revelations upon revelations dawned upon the detective then. Things such as Kuwabara's indirect crush on Hiei via his twin sister Yukina; why the answer to question two was a; and why Kurama suddenly shut down. He truly did like him; it wasn't just one of those weird 'kissing your closest friend' dreams.

"You know, I'm getting a little sick of your non-chalant silent-let's-watch-everyone-before-making-a-move attitude, Kurama." Kurama would have gasped, but that would have been showing emotion before waiting to see what Yusuke was going to say; "It's like, damn. You're too afraid to get attached because you feel guilty about your mom. You don't want to tell me that you like me because you know that I'm just a human and I'm gonna die soon, where as you'll live on and on and on to be a hundred…"

"I'm well over a hundred," the silent one spoke up. Yusuke was morbidly carefree.

"Okay, a thousand. Either way, you've gotta do something with your boring human life until you can go back home again." The detective cleared his composure and his throat, having been a bit too harsh on the boy, and started anew with, "Hey, I found a flyer in the hallway earlier today. The school's having a dance tomorrow night…"

Leafy green irises rolled back so far that they saw gray matter. Was there no end to the predictable teenage-drama situations that the two would be placed in? A voice inside Kurama's head said no, and the leaves fell back into their normal viewing position.

"…And it would be fun if we went together and raised some hell. We could dress you up as a girl and it would be just so damn hilari-"

"I don't think so," the very feminine (but still masculine with regards to his body's proportions) male interjected. He then pulled his hair out from the tie he was using for school earlier that day and flipped the red locks back beach-lifeguard style.

"Oh come on! It would be so funny!" the raven slicked boy pleaded, "I'll dress up with you and then we can fight all the guys that hit on us later."

Kurama smirked in compliance, agreeing to the rather ridiculous idea. He had never known Yusuke to have such a twisted and…unusual sense of humor. It intrigued him in a rather kinky and perverted way, because the mystique of crossdressing and bisexuality was so frowned upon and underground. Of course he could never admit that once he had taken up a dress and heels in order to gain information on a certain man who wished to marry his mother, and that he still had the items in his closet…back home. There was much to be found in Kurama's closet. Not his sexuality though, no. Yusuke had already openly accused him of liking another boy. More like things of a far more ridiculous nature.

Snowglobes, for one. They were Hiei's actually, but the fire demon insisted that he had no where else to keep his collection. And then there were the numerous amounts of plushies; stuffed unicorns, stuffed chocobos, stuffed Sailor Scouts, just about anything he had the money to purchase. Pay no mind at all to the myriad of doujinshi; stacks upon stacks of doujinshi. Some with such titles like "Dark Chocolate Mints", "Vanilla Chocolate", and "The Stamens and Pistils". (2)

The Universe would find time to have Botan stumble upon the hoard and photograph it later. For now, it had more important things to attend to.

Unfortunately, the boys had fallen asleep, so she let them be, deciding to instead torture a certain fire demon with dreams of his sister marrying Koenma.

To Be Continued…

(1) Trust me. That whole rose thing is symbolic and dirty. And a parody on the fact that Kurama is always hand in hand with a rose. If anyone didn't get it, jump into the gutter and re-read. It's a real hoot, I swear!

(2) There are so many parodies and references here. First off, fans of mine will notice that I advertise my works. The closet, snowglobe collection, and Botan photography all alluded to Huminshou, which has an entire ending paragraph dedicated to talking about Hiei's secret rare collections. The Sailor Scout plushies was a remark on the fact that the creator of Sailor Moon is married in real life to Yoshihiro Togashi. It is also a reference to a statement made by Kurama in one of the manga's about being Tuxedo Mask.

Alternate Chapter Ending

This is a bonus read here. This chapter was going to end entirely different, but I was in a "Let's prolong this story" mood. So this is what I had ORIGINALLY down for this chapter. If you guys like it. Too bad. It's going to be worked in later during the story. But it isn't going to happen just yet.

"I'm well over a hundred," the silent one spoke up.

"Okay, a thousand. Either way, you've gotta do something with your boring human life until you can go back home again. There's no use sitting around and pretending to be a perfect son whose never stolen anything or been some sort of…mmph!"

"Would you like to know what it was like, Yusuke Urameshi?" Kurama whispered into his hand, which was covering Yusuke's mouth rather forcefully. Yusuke nodded, hoping with every fiber of his inner and outer being that Kurama would show him with a physical display of practice lip-locking…but alas…he did not.

"It was wonderful," he informed him, uncupping the other's lips and feather tracing his knuckles down the boy's cheek (not the tattooed one, no!), "And I'd very much like to re-enact it."

"You would?"

"Mm hmm." The suggestive growl vibrated against Yusuke's skin. Of course, he ignored it, because he found something far more childish than adult to say in return.

"Kurama liiiiiiiikes someone!" he squealed as manly as any male can squeal, adding in kissy-kissy lip-smacking noises for that added effect. As promised, the other teen made haste on the re-enactment, however, when the tickling had commenced, Yusuke found himself aching in rear-endal pain.

"My ass! Ah! Ow…ah…ow…can't sit on it this way!"

The exclamation decreed a stop to their horseplay. Their clock was staring at them anyway, with its cold, murderous, and threatening red eyes.

Author's Note

This sucks. The chapter does, but that isn't what I'm complaining about. When I had uploaded Chapter 5, it was April 1st. No, the kiss was not an April Fool's joke either. Basically, I had uploaded CH5 twice because I was unaware that was undergoing maintenance. Author Alerts were not sent out to some people. So Chapter 5 did not get as many reviews as anticipated. But my impatience made me want to upload this before reaching 60 reviews.

So please, if you read both chapters as a lump, please go back and review chapter 5. I hate lumpy reviews, because its hard for me to discern which chapter you are enjoying and which events you are referring to in the chapter.

I'm looking for a super talented comic-manga artist to change some of my works into doujinshis. I'm actually quite serious about this - so contact me if you know of anyone who does commissions on this sort of thing. Please do not leave this info in the review, because this story could be removed for that. Thank you!

Self-advertisement - I updated two Candy Series fics. One is borderline lime/lemon. Keep in mind that I don't write lemons, I just pretend to.

Zelia