Hey everybody, it's Star! Sorry for the long wait... if you consider it long... but me and Chili just started school again and got homework right away of course, but do not fret! I have study hall 2nd period and I never have anything to do so I will write! Since Chili ended this at Lambeau Field (Packer's home field!), that's where it will start. This will be a longer chapter, well longer than my other ones, so enjoy!

oooooooooo

"I told you Pip, Wisconsin's beer is stronger."

"Ughhh..."

After the game, Merry and Frodo had to help Pippin out of the stadium. He had wanted to try to see if Miller Beer tasted different in Wisconsin. It had taken him thirteen cans to figure out that Miller tasted the same as it did in Chicago.

"Here," Aragorn shoved a bratwurst in Pippin's mouth, "everyone here is eating them."

They all sat down on stairs of the Pro Shop, waiting for Legolas and Sam to finish shopping for souvenirs. (Legolas had convinced Sam to support the Packers as long as they were in Green Bay.)

Finally, they came out, Legolas wearing a Packers hoodie, and Sam wearing a Kabeer Gbaja-Biamila jersey.

"How is that pronounced?" Frodo pointed at Sam's back. Sam turned in circles attempting to read to read the words. Then he started to get dizzy so he sat down and shrugged.

People were still spilling out of the stadium and it was starting to get dark out.

"Um, Legolas?" Frodo asked. "Where are we going to stay tonight?"

"Uh... good question."

"How 'bout that place we passed on the way here, the Lighthouse Inn. I think the town it was in was called Two Rivers," Aragorn suggested.

"Two Rivers?!" Merry exclaimed. "But we can't star in a hick farm town! There are thieves and murderers on the loose!"

"And Mafia," Frodo added and shuddered.

"Relax guys, this is Wisconsin. You could leave your car door open in a parking lot and no one would notice. Let's just go."

They all piled into the car (Pippin had passed out so they laid him in the trunk) and headed for the inn. After about 45 minutes they stopped at a big, white hotel on the shores of Lake Michigan.

"Everybody out! We're here."

They filed out of the car and were immediately attacked by seagulls.

"Ahhh!" Legolas screamed and jumped in circles. "They're in my hair! Get em out! Get em out!!"

Merry started to get his shotgun but Sam took it away from him, explaining that weapons are not toys.

Suddenly Aragorn had a stroke of genius and opened the car doors so they all get back in again. They sat down in their seats, panting and covered in white droppings.

"That...was so...nasty," Aragorn said.

Everyone gave him weird looks. They all knew that Aragorn usually didn't care how dirty he was.

Legolas was hyperventilating. "My hair! It's dirty! What am I going to do?! I need water! I need shampoo!"

"Settle down," Merry slapped Legolas across the face with a random Packers coffee mug.

"Well I'm not going out there again," Frodo said, spitting out a few feathers. "We'll have to sleep in the car."

"But I need to shower!"

"Hmm..." Everyone looked around. Legolas was looking at something right in front of him. Lake Michigan.

Getting a crazy-desperate look in his eyes, he crawled into the trunk, shoved an unconscious Pippin off his suitcase, and located his bottle of Herbal Essence. Laughing hysterically he flew out of the car and ran to thewater.

The hobbits (minus Pippin) and Aragorn watched as Legolas dove head first into the water, which was about ten inches deep. Legolas stood up, scratched his head, the waded in deeper and began to shampoo his hair.

Just then Pippin sat straight up. "I'm hungry." He blinked. "And my head really hurts."

"I'm hungry, too," Merry said.

There's no use just sitting here in the car," Sam pointed out. "Why don't we just leave?"

"Good idea." Aragorn jumped into the driver's seat and started the engine. He drove over the grass, onto the sand, and rolled down the window. "Legolas! Come on, we're going!"

Legolas sunk down into the water so only his eyes were visible. "But the seagulls will get me!"

Frodo reached into his suitcase and pulled out one of those fancy umbrellas that automatically open and have a little light inside. He threw it to Legolas.

"Woohoo!" Legolas exclaimed as he caught the umbrella. He opened it and was distracted by the light only for a few seconds. Then he came to his senses and ran to the car holding the umbrella carefully over his head. When he got to the car he threw his bottle of Herbal Essence into the trunk, hitting the now conscious Pippin.

"Ow...Legolas we're hungry, can we go somewhere to eat?"

"Ok."

Aragorn drove off the beach and back onto the road. They started pointing out places where they wanted to eat.

"How about McDonalds?"

"Do I look like I'm made out of money?" Legolas snapped.

"Ok, how about...Shop Ko?"

"That is clearly a grocery store."

"Oh... wow look at that!"

They had stopped in front of a 50's style diner with a big light up arrow on the roof pointing to the words The Penguin Burger Home of the Big Penny, Drive-in Restaurant.

"The penguin burger?" Merry said skeptically.

"Are the burgers really made of penguins?" Pippin asked, horrified.

Tap tap tap.

Everyone jumped. There was a lady tapping on the window. Aragorn rolled it down.

"Are you going to order?" the lady asked. She was wearing an apron and was holding a notepad in her hand. She was also on roller-skates.

"Are the burgers really made of penguins?" Pippin asked.

"No, it's just the name."

"Why?"

The waitress shrugged. "Our specialty burger is called the Big Penny, do you want one of those?"

"Ok, we'll have six. To go."

"Why to go?" Frodo asked.

"Because we want to go home." Legolas said as he plugged his straightener into the cigarette lighter.

They talked causally about nothing in particular until the waitress roller-skated back to their car supporting a large tray of hamburgers. Legolas handed her the money and passed around the burgers and fries.

"Ok, now let's go home."

They all cheered as Aragorn hit the gas and they started speeding down the highway. After an hour, Sam declared that he needed to go to the bathroom.

"Can't you hold it for another..." Legolas glanced at the map, "...76 miles?"

"No!"

"All right, all right." He instructed Aragorn to get off at the next exit.

They stopped in front of a building with light up words saying Mars Cheese Castle. Sam was out of the car before anyone had even taken off their seat belts.

As they walked inside, the bell over the door sounded. It was very silent inside. Everywhere was large quantities of butter, cheese, bacon, and brats. In the middles of the room was a giant plastic cow.

Pippin was very intrigued by the cow and went to look at it.

"Don't touch it!" Merry warned when Pippin reached out his hand.

Pippin made a face at Merry. He reached out and pulled the cow's udder.

An earsplitting MOO came out from a speaker on the cow's mouth.

Pip screamed and ran back to the car. After a few minutes Legolas, Aragorn and the rest of the hobbits followed suit.

Legolas put the 4 lbs of Pine River Dairy butter that he had purchased into the cooler. "What, I like butter..."

"Yeah, whatever Legolas."

Two hours later they finally arrived in Chicago.

"Home sweet home!" Merry exclaimed as they walked into their condo. Legolas put his precious butter in the freezer.

Frodo walked down the hall to his room. He started to turn the knob- then he stopped. His hobbit senses were going haywire. He heard shallow breathing coming from behind the door. Someone was inside. Frodo gathered his courage and threw open the door.

oooooooooo

Oooo! A cliffhanger!!

All the Wisconsin places that our wonderful characters have visited are 100 real. Me and Chili went to most of them when she came with me! Everyone who is anyone has been to Mars Cheese Castle. It's a known fact. And Pine River Dairy is owned by my uncle! Best butter in the world! And the Penguin Burger, hehe. I haven't been there in a long time, but it is a real place in Manitowic. Go Packers!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Leave a review and you get a free pound of butter compliments of my uncle!