Pulling Away

Chapter 6

Author's Note: Use of the F word again. Reviews are greatly appreciated. Please review and let me know what you think, and so I know if people are reading. Thank you.

Disclaimer: I do not own any rights whatsoever associated with 24. Wish I did, but I don't. You know the drill don't own characters, plots, beautiful actors, etc etc.

Tony sat on the kitchen floor, his mouth gaping open. He couldn't believe this. He never thought Michelle would ever do anything like that to him. After several minutes on the floor, Tony snapped himself out of his daze, and put the lock box away, but left the letter out. He walked over to the refrigerator and opened a beer. He walked over to the couch still amazed and getting angrier by the second. He heard the water shut off upstairs, and he could feel his face flush. He began rapidly drinking his beer, and finishing it in under a minute. He hastily got up from the couch and walked over to the fridge, his steps heavy and his body tense. He forcefully pulled the door of the fridge open and grabbed 2 beers. Once both were opened, one's contents were immediately in his stomach. He heard Michelle walking down the stairs. He took a deep breath in and another big swig from the can.

When she was downstairs, the first thing her eyes were greeted with was Tony gulping down a beer. This depressed her in a myriad number of ways. She made eye contact with her husband who shot guns at her with his stare. Michelle was offended and she put on her hard ass attitude, the one she normally pursued at work.

"Excuse me, I don't think you have a right to look at me like that. If anything I should be the one glaring at you." She said her voice steady with no signs of faltering. Tony, angered by her comment slightly crushed the empty beer can in his hand, threw it on the counter, and jerked the fridge door open for his fourth in 5 minutes. Tony's finger's snapped the can open, and he took one more gulp before speaking.

"And why might I ask should you be glaring at me?" He said with a tone similar to the one he used when he was defending his cause of breaking Jane Saunders out of CTU to Jack. Jack was never intimidated by Tony, but on occasion Michelle was, and now was one of those times, but she bit her lip and worked up the nerve to tell him exactly why.

"Because, do you even love me anymore? You've treated me horribly since you've been home, and I don't deserve it in the least. Last night when you were drunk and you just came upstairs and fucked me, you never said anything to me, you never even looked at me. You don't love me anymore." Michelle yelled tears starting to form. Tony glared at her.

"I can't believe you have the audacity to say I don't love you. I should be the one saying it to you." Tony said even angrier than before, if it was even possible. Michelle's mouth gaped open with shock. She couldn't believe what she was hearing.

"Why on Earth would you think that I don't love you. I brought you home, and made everything nice for you, I've tried to get close to you, but apparently I am so revolting to you now, that you have to get piss drunk to come near me. Well that's not good enough for me Tony. I've waited for you for 2 years, and you're finally home and it's like you're not even here." She defended herself, not knowing what was coming up.

"Yeah, well I think that's minuscule compared to you never telling me that you were pregnant, and you miscarried because of the virus. What, you thought I didn't need to know? Or did you just think that I'd never find out?" Tony said giving her a hard, cold stare. Michelle froze. Every muscle in her body jammed, and her brain was spinning in circles. She finally found the strength to answer, but her words were hesitant.

"How, - how'd you find out about that?" She asked quietly looking down at the ground feeling ashamed.

"The tax collector called and he needed a number out of the box, and when I was putting the paper for him back, I found the letter that NHS sent you." He said while grabbing the letter off the counter and laying it in front of her. His tone softened because he saw that Michelle was getting rattled. There were no words from Michelle's mouth, and Tony was still waiting for her explanation. "Why Michelle, why did you never tell me?" He said, the words registering in his heart and tears beginning to form in his lids. Michelle, by now, had tears flowing down her face. Slowly, she lifted her head and looked her husband right in the eye.

"I, - you have to understand, when I found that out you had just been sentenced to 35 years without parole. I thought I had lost you forever. When you were pardoned, it had been such a long time since I had gotten the letter, and I didn't even think about it." She said crying. Tony nodded remembering his sentencing, and shivers went through his body.

"But that doesn't justify never telling me while I was in jail." He said hurt by how true his words were. Michelle paused again before answering.

"I'm sorry, but you were in a state of depression. I didn't want to make it worse." Michelle began. "Please Tony, I was just trying to help you. You didn't need anything else to add to the state you were in." She finished. Tony's heart sunk deeper and deeper into his stomach with every words she uttered. Tears were freely flowing from his eyes by now also. He gazed at her glossy and blood shot eyes with his, and she could see that he felt betrayed.

"But Michelle, that was our child. Mine and yours. We created it together, it was part of both of us." Tony said very softly. "I just don't see how you could have kept something like that from me if you really loved me the way you say you do. When I was in prison, I thought about you every single day. You were what got me through it, but this," he paused. "It makes me wonder if it was all a lie." Tony finished. He started walking past her and up the stairs. When he was on the third stair, Michelle turned around.

"Tony." She said. He turned around and looked at her with the saddest eyes she had ever seen. His heart was breaking right in front of her, and she knew there was nothing she could say to make it any better. She could only hope, that in time, he would forgive her, but she knew if their positions were reversed, she wouldn't be able to forgive him.

"Michelle, I just have one last question for you." She looked up at his words. He took a deep breath before speaking again. "Tell me honestly, would you really have waited 35 years for me?" He finished. Michelle looked away. She knew that when Tony threw the word honesty, into his sentence, he wanted the truth. Michelle knew that if she lied to him, it'd hurt him more, so she looked up at him and gave him an honest answer.

"I don't know."

Tony turned and continued walking up the stairs, his head hanging down. He slowly walked into their bedroom, and broke down. He collapsed on the side of the bed and his head was pushed into their comforter. He began sobbing uncontrollably. Michelle could hear his cries of pain from downstairs. She desperately wanted to run upstairs and hold him, but she was to upset with herself. She knew she was causing his pain, and in turn, this caused her pain. She began crying harder every time she heard him crying. She walked over to the couch, and lay on her stomach crying into the cushion.