AN: I am still grateful to my beta snarkyroxy who is making my work so much better
Thanks to smiles28, pathatlon, crazy-pyscho, natsuyori, watergoddesskasey, babyruth15, llCrayolall, MagickAlianne for reviewing
4. Potions and Spells.
Hermione followed Snape as soon as she could find an excuse to satisfy her friends. She caught up with him near the Potions classroom.
'Sir, may I speak with you?' she asked him.
Severus looked at the girl, and not finding any plausible excuse to refuse her, he nodded. 'Come with me.'
Hermione followed him and was surprised that he was not taking her into the classroom. They reached a wooden door with a painting of a goose where he uttered an incantation that she could not decipher and then they entered a room.
Looking around, she saw a sofa in front of the fireplace, a desk with lots of parchments on it and a large library containing many kinds of books. There were two other doors. One probably led to his bedroom, but the other…?
Severus noticed the inquisitive look on Hermione's face, and seeing her looking with curiosity at the door, he said, 'That door leads to my private lab. Do you want to see it?'
She looked at him in shock and surprise, but nodded and followed him. The lab was stunning; shelves upon shelves of ingredients stored in alphabetical order, five clean tables, tools of every shape and size, and at least seven cauldrons.
'Here is where I do my research,' he curtly said. 'Now, what do you want?'
She fidgeted a bit with the hem of her robe. 'Well, sir, I thought that we should organize some meetings to research a solution for our spell. I just wanted to know how we are going to plan it.'
He beckoned for her to follow him. They re-entered his living room and he motioned her to sit on the sofa. He stood, giving her his back and leaning on the mantel of the fireplace.
He was radiating anger and power. She could feel he was restraining himself from lashing out at her. He had almost been nice with her.
'You will be my assistant. You have the highest mark in the class and you want to be my apprentice next year, so these sessions will be used for me to determine if you are suited for the position,' he said seriously.
Hermione was surprised; she did not expect this offer. She had considered an apprenticeship, but only with Professor Flitwick. Now, the idea of becoming a Potion Mistress was starting to appeal to her. 'But what about Voldemort?'
His shoulders twitched. 'Do not say his name, foolish girl!'
Hermione got scared and he remained silent until he thought that he had regained his equilibrium. At her silly question he replied truthfully, 'I will tell him that I did it in order to spy on you and your friend Potter. He knows that you are very close to him and he will not complain about an extra eye on you.'
They discussed other topics related to the Fidelius Charm and the Binding Spell and when the bell struck eleven he offered to escort her back to Gryffindor Tower.
Before leaving the room, he took a little bottle and gave it to her. 'It is a Dreamless Sleep potion. If you wake up from now on with a sense of anguish then take a drop and you will be able to fall asleep again.'
Hermione looked at him with sorrow in her eyes. 'I am so sorry, sir. I didn't want to involve you in this situation. It was silly of me to follow Harry and Ron. I know it's not worth much to you, but I am truly sorry.'
He snorted. 'If you have only now realised that following Potter and Weasley around is a foolish thing, you are no less of a dunderhead than they.'
Severus did not say a single word after that, but when they arrived at the tower whispered, 'Goodnight Miss Granger. Believe me when I say that I know how sorry you are. To spend the rest of your life with me is something I would not wish on anyone.'
She did not have time to reply because he quickly left. Those words surprised her; it almost seemed as though he felt sorry for her. She hadn't meant her apology as an unsult to him, but it seemed he had never had a good awareness of himself. His nastiness could be in part caused by that perception.
Hermione did not believe that he was so unpleasant only because of his life experience. She believed that part of his nastiness was his own take on life. She shrugged her shoulders. For now there was nothing she could do but she was going to work to help him a bit.
…Something strange this way comes…
The news that Hermione was Snape's assistant spread through the school very fast and many theories were put forward. Some said that the Headmaster had ordered the Professor to take her and others supposed that Snape was secretly attracted to the girl, because he had never taken an assistant before.
Hermione was well protected from questions and gossip by Ron and Harry, who were never leaving her side.
Severus was seething at the stupidity of most theories and glad that because he was the scary Professor no one, not even his colleagues, would dare ask him his motives.
Draco Malfoy was very suspicious and decided to keep an eye on his Head of House and the Mudblood. Something fishy was going on.
Hermione was sitting at the table for breakfast and she looked more tired than usual. She had decided that if she wanted to know who he was she had to feel his emotions. When the nightmares started she woke up in a pool of sweat, but she refused to take the potion he had given her.
The man was really suffering quite a lot. She had never imagined that she could feel sorry for him. He was still a bastard, but now he was her bastard and she was determined to work out a way to understand him.
Severus eyed the girl and was suddenly angry, he could feel that she was scared and sad and he knew that she hadn't taken the potion. Hermione felt a wave of anger wash over her and looked up at the Professor. She saw his dark eyes and the warning in them not to fool with him.
Draco watched the exchange, but he didn't understand what was going on. The two had a connection, though, and he was going to find out exactly what it was.
Hermione felt cranky for the whole day and was confused as to whether it was her own feelings or his. There were a lot of emotions in her mind and it was going to take time in order to understand and to discern one from another.
Annoyance and boredom were predominant with small amounts of anger. She was sure that he felt this way during all his classes.
Severus was watching another class of dunderheads and was starting to receive her emotions. She was happy most of the times but on occasions he could feel her brooding. Was it when she was feeling him?
He sighed. How where they going to cope with each other? He could probably come to respect her, despite her friends, her house and her annoying know-it-all attitude… but love?
Love and passion? Could he ever imagine himself sleeping with her? A smiling and very talkative Granger waiting for him in his quarters? He shuddered and he felt her doing so too.
Hermione sensed some strange feelings in Snape; something warm but she couldn't detect which emotion it was and then a wave of coldness hit her again. The man was a volcano! She never would have suspected that he could be this passionate.
Hermione and Severus started to meet every night. There were days where they thought they were close to the solution and others where the hope faded away quickly.
Most of the time they argued about each other feelings.
Severus would shout, 'How many times do I have to tell you, I am tired of feeling this cheerfulness while I am teaching my classes!'
And she would nastily reply, 'Much better than to feel bored to death! You're always annoyed about something. And let's not even speak about the fear that takes hold of me every time you're summoned!'
He looked at her. The last bit of information was a new addition to her tirade. 'You know when I get called?'
He tried to catch her sincere eyes. He was starting to read her as an open book. Sometimes he was scared of how much he knew her and angry that she seemed to know him just as well, even without his consent.
Now she was looking pointedly at her feet. 'You get this aura of coldness around you, and then I feel the pain.'
He sighed. 'Why didn't you tell me before?'
He moved closer to the girl. It was close to Christmas and they had been meeting for three months. He had never touched her before.
'Hermione.' Taking her chin in his hand he lifted her head and her troubled eyes met his own. 'This is what I have to do. The Dark Lord enjoys causing pain, but we need the information. You don't have to worry, I can't die, remember?'
She looked at him with unshed tears in her eyes. 'You can't die but you can still feel pain.' She touched his arm where the Dark Mark was tattooed.
Severus moved his other hand, momentarily tempted to tear his arm away, but he recognised the sincerity of her gesture and instead placed his hand over her own in his arm. He had never let anyone so close since his mother's death. He had slept with as many women as any other Death Eater and could say that the majority of the women had been Muggles and taken against their will.
He was scared to become closer to a woman like Hermione Granger. She was so naive and simple. She enjoyed life and friends. Her world was sunny while his was bathed in shadows.
While these thoughts were going through his mind, Hermione was doing some thinking on her own.
She was surprised that he was made of flesh and bones. His skin was warm although his hand was a bit rough due to the many potions ingredients he had been working with.
Severus was watching the girl and he could feel confusion and something akin to warmth starting to spread from her to him.
They looked at each other and she closed her eyes. He was going to kiss her, he was finally going to taste her soft pink lips.
And then a thought hit him like a cold shower: since when had he desired kissing one of his students? He took a step back and noticed her brown eyes expressing a hint of disappointment.
She took a calming breath and after a few minutes in which they simply stared at each other she said, 'I am going to sleep, sir. See you tomorrow.'
He cleared his throat. 'Hermione, you do not know me well enough, aside from the fact that I am your teacher. I cannot break Albus' trust. However… we could start with you calling me Severus when we meet in the evenings.'
She studied him briefly and satisfied she smiled. 'Are you sure?'
He was slightly smirking but he nodded.
Hermione's smile widened. 'Goodnight, Severus.' And with that she left the room, still a bit disappointed but satisfied with the final outcome.
She did not know when she had started to accept him in her life, but she was beginning to see different sides of him and tonight he had been almost sweet with her. She went to sleep thinking about him, about Severus, now she was calling him by his first name.
Severus was feeling giddy. He did not know how much of the sensation was his or hers, but he definitely felt that tonight something had been started.
He was not ready to consider Hermione a woman but he had come closer to that tonight. Nobody has ever wanted to touch him intentionally and he was pleased to know she was not repulsed by him.
She was still so young and innocent, though. Severus felt an odd sense of misery that he had to ruin something so pure.