Head Trip - Chapter 8
At first, it was blinding hot. Can pain be hot? It felt as if a heated poker had been thrust between her eyes. The fire burned itself into the recesses of her brain. If pain could be a color, this was brilliant bursts of white and orange exploding within her skull. The flames licked at the corners of her mind, trying to grasp consciousness and burn away her thoughts, her will. The searing heat soon spread to the rest of her body. She felt as if her blood was boiling.
The cold came next. The white-hot poker became a pillar of ice, expanding and filling her skull with its deep and numbing pain. She felt as if she were submerged in a sea of blue-black frigid water, her limbs becoming heavy and slow. Her mind was shutting down as her hypothermic body sunk beneath the waves … No! Stay alert – this is just an illusion! You can ride this out …float on the inky water … let it carry you …
She did not fight the pain; instead, she allowed it to enter brazenly. She gave it room to play within the furrows of her brain; she allowed it to tease and taunt her. Welcoming the pain freed her. She moved through the pain and came to a hidden place of safety where she could concentrate all energy on preserving her own thoughts, emotions, and will. She found, in the end, that she became a dispassionate observer of her own tortured mind.
Fifth was livid. How could this be happening? He had been probing Carter's mind for hours. He could see the physical signs of his torture: first, in her fevered face and restless body, and, then, as her blue-tinged lips and fingers shivered uncontrollably.
He could not reach her mind! It was as if a barrier had gone up, some type of mental protection. The pain was getting through to her, but her thoughts and feelings were not getting through to him. Sam Carter seemed to be providing a level of resistance that he had never encountered before.
He was feeling frustrated and confused by this first round of "communication". As he pulled his hand from her forehead, he felt a wave of exhaustion sweep over him. Highly unusual, but probably another element of "being human". He would take a brief rest and then resume his mental interrogation.
Fifth looked down at the figure slumped before him.The love he had professed still burned within him, but he also carried the anger of being spurned. He had replicated this woman, and had trained her well. He taught her what she needed to know for her first mission, under the watchful eyes of First. He had planned to teach her more, much more, when she returned from Earth. He had planned to teach her about human emotions, about the human heart. Instead, he now knew the agony of loss … all because of Carter and O'Neill.
Sam stirred and moaned quietly. Fifth's face hardened as he thought of how she would be punished. He would find those corners of her mind, those memories he needed, and twist them as he did before. The next time, she would bend ….