After a conversation with Meg, I went back to my room.

Ch 1

The afternoon passed without much activity. Just as before my rendezvous with the vicomte, I stayed upstairs and worked while Meg and Madeline cleaned and did whatever else was normal for their day. Madeline returned late in the afternoon and tapped on the door. She sounded horrified when she told me how she had forgotten about the croissants. She offered to go out again but I had no interest. I didn't even notice when she left the room.

I'll be damned if the checkbook wasn't balanced. Not even a week yet eleven hundred francs were missing. However, money was least of my worries.

I went about planning for the meeting with the vicomte first. My mind was made up. He would not claim my son as a nephew. I had no interest in Alexandre assuming the Chagny name. He would have my name and no other. If the vicomte didn't like it then he could go to hell.

And to hell with the truce. I owed him nothing.

If he wanted to set up funds for Alexandre, he would need to do so through a third party. Meg and Charles had become Alexandre's legal guardians as I needed a married couple to become his guardians should I die. Anything regarding Alex would be done through their solicitor

Which reminded me, I still needed to ask Charles if he would agree, and to ask him what he paid for Meg's ring.

My Julia.

I was hell-bent on finding a convincing reason for Julia to agree to marriage. There had to be something I could tell her that she would find remarkable.

I would capture it on paper and take it with me for my after-dinner proposal.

Alexandre knocked on the open door a few hours after his studies concluded for the day and provided a queer distraction. He rushed in and asked if I thought a bear could defeat a lion in an arena fight. With this question I assumed Charles had moved on to Roman studies.

"The lion, I think," I answered. How was I supposed to know?

"Why not the bear?"

"The lion has teeth and claws."

"But so does the bear."

"Then the bear."

Honestly, I wasn't sure where the difference was between Alexandre's erratic words and Bessie chasing her tail.

Alex stayed for a while and gave valid reasons for and against the bear and the lion. He sat on the bed as I looked over the newspapers I had not read while incapacitated at Julia's home.

It was still a struggle to speak with him. I had a feeling it would be difficult for quite some time.

At last Alex decided that he wasn't sure which animal would win though he was leaning toward a bear, depending on its species. He asked for permission to play with two boys across the street whom I had never heard of before and I consented.

He hugged me from behind before he left. He buried his face against my shoulder and pressed against my neck. I no longer had the heart to reprimand him for leaving the previous night, though I suspected his show of affection was part of a greater scheme.

I turned up the lamp at my writing desk as late afternoon became early evening. After hours of sitting hunched over, I needed to stand and stretch. My body was still sore from several days spent in bed and a long night of walking up and down stairs.

My frustration continued to grow as I sat at my desk. I couldn't think of any reasons for Julia to marry me save one: Longevity.

We shared five years but that wasn't going to be enough to persuade her to stay with me. I stared at the page with the single word I had written hours ago and felt like slamming my head into the wall.

There had to be something more profound.

I loved her.

Ink splattered across the page as I collapsed in the wooden chair again and jotted my second reason down. Just as quickly as I had become excited by my new thought I was just as quickly disappointed. The rest of the paper remained blank.

I folded the list into my overcoat pocket and glanced at the clock again. It was already a quarter past nine.

A quarter past nine!

The vicomte, of course, had reached Julia's home in a timely manner. Before I opened the back door I heard their voices. Julia was laughing.

He was making her laugh. On the night I would ask her to consider marriage, the vicomte was making her laugh.

"…most amusing, Monsieur. Your daughters sound simply delightful."

"The oldest one would love Lisette. Your daughter is a beautiful girl. You can tell she's just like you."

"How very kind of you to say."

I mocked her in disgust before I opened the door, before I ruined their perfect little chat.

He was not supposed to be entertaining Julia. The night was about business, not jovial banter.

The vicomte would not ruin my evening. As much as he tried, I would not allow his inappropriate conversation to destroy my night.

Their pleasant talk ended the moment the door opened and I walked through Julia's kitchen into the dining room. Both of them turned to stare at me and my delayed arrival. It irritated me that they said nothing.

"I apologize," I said through my teeth. "Though I see it made no difference to either of you."

Julia rose and took my cloak without a word, which left my snide comment lingering in the room.

"Good evening," the vicomte said politely. His courteous nature was grating on my nerves.

I nodded, barely glancing in his direction. His perfect hair, face and clothing made me well aware of how my attire only emphasized what a disaster I truly was. My anger flared as Julia returned to the dining room.

"Would you like something to drink? Dinner should be finished shortly."

"What do you have in your cellar?" I asked.

Julia walked toward the kitchen. "Raoul, would you like something as well?"

He respectfully declined and Julia told me to follow her. The moment we reached the cellar door she turned and glared at me.

"Your disrespect is completely unnecessary," she said quietly.

"Disre--? My what?"

"You know very well what you said was rude. I expect you will be civil tonight for Alex's sake or I will ask you to leave."

She was treating me like a child. I would not be treated like an infant. "So you will be alone with him again? Is that what you want?"

Julia's hazel eyes narrowed. "Are you…jealous? Of the two of us talking?"

"What a preposterous claim," I scoffed.

She sighed and shifted her weight. "I suppose you expected that I would just sit there and stare at him in silence until you bothered to make an appearance?"

My fingers found the folded list inside my overcoat pocket. Longevity and love, I thought, I would hold my tongue for the sake of longevity and love.

I did what I had to do to appease her.

"You're right," I said. My insides were burning. It took every ounce of self-control to say those two words. She wasn't right, there was nothing to be right about, but if it stopped her from yelling at me on the night I wanted to ask for her hand, then so be it.

Her expression changed. Julia was both amazed and delighted about my change of attitude. She nodded slowly. "Thank you," she replied. She patted me on the chest and told me to wait for her. A moment later she returned with a bottle of wine. "Shall we begin?"

I nodded. The sooner the vicomte left the sooner the enjoyable half of the night could begin.

Raoul de Chagny was absurdly prepared for the evening. He brought points, counterpoints, balances, proof of estates and receipts from his daughters' education as further certification of his financial stability.

In the hour and forty-five minutes he spent explaining his plan I kept thinking of how I would approach Julia. My proposal to Christine had been very concise. I gave her the gold band and asked if she would marry me.

She refused.

While the vicomte continued his rambling, fear began to worm its way into my mind. What if Julia rejected my proposal? I had not entertained the idea of her refusing me.

Oh God, she could very well say no.

The thought terrified me.

"Erik?" Julia said.

She startled me. I looked at her and then at the vicomte.

"Do you need more time to decide?" the vicomte asked.

I needed to think things over. "Give me a month," I said.

The vicomte began shuffling papers and filing them neatly into his leather folder. "I have left my address for correspondence with Julia. I thank you both for a pleasant evening," he said as he rose.

He was leaving. I hadn't listened to a word he had said since I arrived.

"Have a safe trip," Julia replied. She stood with him and went to fetch his coat.

The vicomte nervously wrung his hands as we remained alone in the same room. He had no reason to be apprehensive. I couldn't have cared less that he was still there.

"I know you don't want him to have my name and I don't blame you. I would not want my son to carry another man's name either." He paused and licked his lips. "However, would you consider giving him both names? Chagny and Kire?"

"I'll consider," I muttered.

He nodded and Julia returned to the dining room with his cloak, gloves, and hat.

"Well…" he started.

"Well, good night," I said before he could finish.

His face hardened but he said nothing. He donned his outer garb and started to the front entrance. Julia glared at me but followed the vicomte without protest. I rose as well, deciding it would be in my best interest to see him to the door.

"Where are you traveling to next?" I asked in an attempt to sound interested.

"Lyon," he said.

I realized I had nothing to say to him. "Is it…nice….there?"

"Yes, quite," he answered. He apparently had nothing to say to me either.

"Thank you for a lovely evening," Julia said. She faced away from me as she spoke. "When you are in Paris again, don't hesitate to bring your daughters by the house."

"Oh, of course, of course," he said. "You've been a most gracious host."

Apparently I had become furniture in the way of their coupling.

"Good night," Julia said as they shook hands.

The vicomte looked at me one last time. "Thank you for agreeing to meet tonight."

His placid nature irritated me. "Anything for Alexandre," I said.

He finally left. Once the door closed, I wished I hadn't shoved him so quickly from Julia's home.

"If you think I am taking you upstairs you have another think coming," Julia seethed. "I told you last night—"

"I know what you told me." I took the note from my pocket. Longevity and love, I told myself, I would look past her anger for the sake of longevity and love.

She turned her head to the side. "What is that?"

"It's a list."

"A list of what?"

"Of things I wanted to discuss with you tonight," I answered. My hands had started to tremble. She could have at least had the decency to be more civil at such a crucial moment.

Julia started to reach for the list but I pulled it away and shoved it back into my pocket.

"Erik—"

"May we sit down?"

She stared at me a while suspecting I was up to something lecherous. With a sigh she nodded. "The parlor," she said.

I followed her into the study and pulled up a chair beside hers. She folded her hands in her lap and sighed.

"Now what was so urgent?"

"I have something I would like to present for your consideration," I started. She stared at me with an unwavering gaze that made me increasingly uncomfortable.

She rubbed her eyes with her uninjured hand. "Well, say it then, Erik."

"I want you to agree to marriage," I blurted out. She had me so damned flustered that I shouted out my words.

"You…what?"

"Marriage, to marriage, I want you to agree to marriage."

"You're proposing?" She held her hand to her heart.

"No."

"No?"

"Not unless you first agree."

We stared at each other for a moment. She tried very hard not to smile but lost the struggle and let out a soft chuckle. Her response angered me. The last thing I wanted was to see her laugh at my proposition.

"You won't ask me to marry you unless I agree to marry you?" she asked.

I rose to my feet, my skin rising with gooseflesh and my neck flushed with embarrassment. Not even Christine had laughed in my face.

"So now you're going to leave?"

"Are you refusing my offer?"

Julia crossed her arms. "You've hardly made an offerErik."

"Good night, Julia," I said gruffly.

She took my hand and had me sit again. "What is the list for? Persuasion?"

"Not anymore."

Julia was quiet for a moment. I couldn't bring myself to look at her.

"May I hear the reasons?" she asked quietly.

"Longevity and love," I said under my breath. "Damned longevity and love."

"Longevity?"

"Five years," I snapped. "We've had five years together."

She considered my words for a moment. "So I should agree to a proposal because you bedded me for five years?"

"If that's how you so crudely want to put it. And because I love you," I said. I sighed and started to stand again. "Forget it. I've changed my mind."

"Erik, you are the most maddening, juvenile creature I have ever known. First you ask me to marry you and make it into the most dreadful-sounding business proposal I ever heard. Then you didn't even give me an opportunity to answer."

"Then answer."

"Fine. My answer is no, I will not agree to your proposal."

I was surprised I could still breathe after she denied me. I looked away from her and wanted to sob. Nothing had come out right. I had made an ass of myself.

"I will, however, agree to courtship."

I turned and faced her. "To what?"