by Tina
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Rachel watched the candle flames dancing slowly, almost exactly in the same rythm of the song that softly played on the background. One of the few romantic CDs Ross had mixed for her. The atmosphere was so calm and peaceful, she felt like she could almost float. She was so light... she could barely feel she even had a body.
His touch brought her back to physical reality. The way he ran a finger sofly up her arm made her so glad she did have a body...
He kissed her neck as she kept on admiring her bedside table. A set of four scented candles that rested there were the only light source in the room. It specially lit her picture frames. She smiled and finally closed her eyes, enjoying his lips and his naked body pressed up against her back.
They'd finally managed to be together again. Her parents were out to a gala and Rachel arranged things so both her sisters would be out that evening. The house was all theirs. Of course they were happy enough with the confinements of her four walls.
She turned her face and her lips found his.
Not many words had been spoken in a while. But it didn't matter. Nothing needed to be said then. The way they connected was far too developed to demand such trivial tools.
But as their hormonal driven passion was wearing off, they saw in each other a friend. A friend to talk to, to laugh with or, if it was the case, to stay quiet with, too. However, it wasn't the case anymore... As shallow as it could be labelled by some, the conversations they shared at intimate times like those were also a way to stablish contact and bring them closer. Not that they ever lost contact or were driven away, but the mere sound of each other's voice was... and the thoughts in their heads, sometimes so silly and confused...
So it wasn't necessary, but it was nice...!
Rachel smiled.
"Have you taken care of that dinosaur?" she barely whispered.
He laughed softly. She loved the sound of it...
"Should I, really?"
"Well, if you want more of this, I'd suggest that you do"
Ross kissed her shoulder.
"Then consider it done"
She smiled.
"I have do say, didn't care much for that poster staring down at us either" he commented, refering to a poster she kept near her bed.
She laughed.
"I hope that's now what you had in mind a few minutes ago"
"No, no, you kept me busy enough"
They kissed softly and rearranged themselves in each other arms. Rachel turned to face him and hugged his torso, laying her face on his chest. He wrapped his arms around her and laid his head on her pillow. Rachel Green's pillow. In Rachel Green's room. Even though they'd been together for a while now, this thought still amased him.
Hmmm, bliss.
Both closed their eyes and just enjoyed the simple moment.
Ross wondered if he should tell her what he'd known all along and time did nothing but confirm. This seemed like a good oportunity... Their relationship just kept getting better and better... And it seemed like she liked him even more as the days went by. Each day more he got used to the fact that this was really happening. Maybe if he seased the moment she'd even... say it back to him?
He looked down at floor and spotted the chearleading outfit she had not long before worn for him. It had been an amazing night...! Could this wreck it or give it the perfect ending?
"Rach?"
"Yeah?" her response was almost a whisper.
"Can I say something?"
"Sure"
Her eyes were still closed and she didn't move. He wondered for a moment. He wanted her to be looking into his eyes and see how honest his simple words would be. 'She must've heard this many times before.' But he doubted anyone meant them as much as he did. It just didn't seem possible.
He shifted her in a way that gave her the hint. She sat up and looked at him.
"You don't have to say it back... I just want you to know..."
"Yes...?"
"I love you"
She had to hold her breath.
Wow.
Yeah, she'd heard that before, but... This was different. Oh God, so much different.
Silence.
She started panicking when she noticed just how quickly the seconds were passing and she couldn't figure out what to say. Her brain couldn't process that information yet.
"Rach?" he whispered and she felt a hint of fear in his voice.
She loathed herself.
Words. She needed words. If only she knew which ones to say...
"Thank you" she whispered.
The disapointed look on his face stung her bad.
"Yo- you're welcome" he almost pathetically answered back.
Rachel mentally kicked herself, but didn't know what else to do.
Then, it seemed as if time stood still, everything froze.
'Goddammit...' Ross hated himself for opening up with her. It was obviously much too soon for them... she wasn't quite there yet. And now she was scared. 'Great, that's just fucking great what you've done!' he told himself.
It seemed like the realisation had finally hit Rachel. There were true genuine feelings at risk here. Feelings of a truly genuinely nice guy. Such a nice guy... How could she play him like that? After all, she had to admit it had all began more like a game. She didn't go after him for who he was. Not unless it counts the fact he was Judy and Jack's son. He was a Geller.
And the fact she now liked him only made it worse. She had developed so much for him. She cared so much about his feelings and she just knew she'd end up breaking his heart. That's what she did best after all, wasn't it? Wrecking guys with her imaturity. It was only a matter of time.
She noticed as he looked at his watch.
"I- I should get going"
"Okay.."
He got out of bed and quietly gathered his clothes and dressed himself. Rachel kept her gaze locked on the floor...
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The next day was Christmas eve. Due their large families, the Greens and Gellers could not have the joint dinner Rachel wished they could. So Ross and Rachel would, together, celebrate with both families, one at a time. It had been arranged for a while now, Rachel had been counting the days with much excitment. But after the previous night... she was somehow dreading the thought of spending the evening with his caring family, knowing how bad she was beeing to a member of it.
Ross knocked on the main door of the Green residense at 8 o'clock sharp for the first round. Jill opened the door.
"Yes?"
"Hey, Jill, is, hm, is Rachel there?"
"Yeah." But she didn't open the door to let him in. "Who are you?"
"It's me, Ross. Ross Geller"
"Oh" Jill looked surprised. "Wow. Come in"
She opened the door and Ross looked around, nervous. Rachel had been over at his house and interacting with his parents a lot since they'd got together. He, on the other hand...
"Ross?"
"Goodnight, Mrs. Green"
"Wow, look at you" Sandra Green hugged Ross. "I haven't seen you in a while"
"Yes, it's been a while." he smiled politely. "You look great"
"Oh, thank you" Sandra smiled, delighted. "Rachel should be down in a second, meanwhile come in, let me take your coat" she did so. "Rachel's father is in the livingroom waiting for the guests"
Ross swallowed hard.
"Thank you"
Ross nervously entered the livingroom and found Dr. Green reading a book whilst waiting.
"Hm, goodnight, Dr. Green"
Ross almost shook himself to dust as Dr. Green slowly looked up at him and took off his reading glasses, inspecting every inch of him.
"Ross Geller, I suppose?"
"Yes, Dr. Green, how are you?"
"Fine." He slowly set his glasses down at a corner table as Ross continued to stand by the door. "Sit down already, will you?"
"Oh, hm, thanks"
'Cool off, my man' Ross told himself.
"So, what is it that you're doing again?"
"I'm in college, Sir. Am majoring in paleontology"
Dr. Green kept a steady glance at Ross for a few very long seconds.
"And what's that supposed to mean?"
Ross didn't know what to answer.
"Hm, it means that hm... I study fossils and-"
He would never be able to thank Rachel enough for showing up that exact moment. He instantly stopped himself and rose from his chair, relievedly smiling at her.
"Good night" he politely told her.
"Hey"
She approached him and he nervously kissed her cheek.
"Hey, daddy. Were you just giving Ross a hard time?"
"Eh..."
Dr. Green put his glasses back on and picked up his book. Ross sighed and Rachel looked back at him. They looked at each other for a while and seemed to both think about the previous night. And both could tell. He picked up her hand and lightly played with it.
"Can we talk?"
She nodded.
They entered the dining room, already set for their fancy Christmas dinner, and kept the door open.
"If I close this my dad will kill you dead..." she explained.
He couldn't help but smile.
"Better not tell him about last night, then..."
She couldn't help but smile.
"Hm, anyway... I just want you to know, Rach, that... what I said to you last night... I'm not expecting anything from you. I just wanted you to know, that's all."
She nodded.
"Okay"
"So... are we good?"
"Yeah"
"Good...! 'Cause I couldn't sleep last night thinking about it"
He hugged Rachel and she just felt worse. Man, if he couldn't sleep afer that, how the hell was he going to react when she really screwed up bad?
She disconsidered the fact that she didn't get much sleep herself.
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The midnight bell rang. Over at the Gellers' casual and warm party, everybody greeted one another. Rachel felt particulary touched when Judy Geller hugged her and whispered soft words in her ears.
"...you're like the daughter I've never had..."
Leaving Monica's feelings aside, it was a very sweet thing to hear. But probably not what she wanted at the moment.
Rachel was showered with presents from all family members. Clothes, acessories, cute little things and even jewelry. When she opened her last present from Ross, her heart sank lower. It was a pretty little bear keychain. It was white and in its belly it read "Ross 'red heart' Rachel".
"Thank you" she still smiled weakly at him and kissed him softly, as the relatives pretended not to watch.
They sat down together on a couch and Rachel kept the keychain tight inside her hand. He wrapped an arm around her and kept on talking to a cousin, while Rachel looked straight ahead, deep in though. She finally snapped out of it and saw Monica and Chandler talking. She smiled weakly and Monica noticed, smiling back brightly.
Rachel sighed and moved her eyes away from them...
They reached Charlie.
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Tan-tan. I liked this chapter. My favorite so far, I think. Please post reviews...!!! :) I'm expecting more this time, lol...
