"Are we to call them fallen angels, then?" she asked her self, her blue eyes scanning the face of the stone angel. "Are we just to… mourn? And am I just to forget?" she turned to the little man that shimmered into view, perched on the shoulder of the concrete angel. "Are you going to make me forget?" question filled her eyes, and the rain still fell.

Julius Root sat there, his wings discarded carelessly at the angel's feet, the remnants of his hair dripping wet and his brow furred. He looked up into young eyes, his old orbs not seeming to see at all.

"Now," he asked slowly, "do you really need me to answer that?"

Sorrow washed her face as Julius watched, sorrow like when she passed her fingers over her brother's grave. Sorrow like when –

bzzt

Juliet saw it, a memory like a photo shot, like a badly aimed camera.

From eyes that where not her own, she saw her self thrown from Fowl Manor, her own brother's hands on her limbs as he dragged her out of the heavy front doors. She remembered looking up from the well kept lawn into her brother's eyes, eyes that spoke of an age that she would never understand. He shook his head at her, shutting the door quickly before she could pull her self up. She saw her hair, golden and disheveled flutter behind her as she flung herself at the door, pounding and screaming.

In this mental video, her sight panned out, into the entourage of fairies gathered around the manor, each with sad faces and tears in their eyes.

bzzt

Sorrow like when her brother tried to spare her life when she felt it should have been hers.

"Tell me," she said, unexpectedly, "tell me what happened. Everything. Because… I want to know before I forget." she clutched the rose in her hand tightly, a single thorn digging into her skin. Her eyes pleaded, begged, yearned for the rest of the truth. The r e a s o n s .

Julius ran his hand over his face, leaving his hand on his lips, his eyes up into the rain.

"Well," he began, "you already know the beginning…"

The screen faded out, the static starting in one corner, moving across so that the whole view was filled with nothing but the black and white dots.

A low hum emitted from the television, and the scene began unfolding before her closed eyes as Julius spoke in his grainy tones.

It flashed by, each panorama flickered unstably.

The mind wipes…

bzzt

She had strapped on her helmet and flew out of the manor out into a moon lit night, where the trees were filled with wind. Tears trickled down from hazel eyes. Hazel eyes that drowned in oceans of him

Those eyes? That smile? The way he whispered good bye to her… it was too much. The first times that she felt an emotion overflow within her that she didn't want to end.

That was it; she didn't want to stop feeling this. This yearning, this

un-con-di-tion-al

love.

She berated her self in the helmet, setting the wings on auto; straight up. Her fingers grasped at the helmet straps, unbuckling and undoing. Each snap reminded her of her sanity slipping. She drew the helmet off, flinging her head back and letting the tears trickle down a different path. She sobbed a little bit louder and let the technology fall from her hands into the entourage of fairies below. Her empty hands clenched and unclenched, wanting something to hold on to.

Artemis.

Her mind reeled and she curled into her self, the wings still floating her higher and higher into the Dublin sky. Her tears fell and sparkled in the starlight.

bzzt

Juliet's eyes didn't widen as the Commander told her of Holly's want for Artemis. She's be a fool if she didn't figure it out after all the month's events.

Julius kept on speaking, his eyes not moving and his voice not wavering.

Holly's despair one year later… and her own mind wipe…

Bzzt

"Are you sure about this, Holls?" the horse asked urgently as he strapped on all the necessary materials. His eye brows merged together as his face was scrunched up in worry for the fairy sitting in the chair with nothing but a long tee shirt on. "Are you sure that you want this?"

"Yes…" she replied, her eyes already distant as if she were already thinking about… the things that she would forget. "I want this, Foaly. Because…" hazel orbs focused again and she looked up at her long time friend, "it… hurts too much… to… remember."

Broken sentences, broken heart, and now a broken memory. Foaly wasn't sure if he could hit the right buttons as his vision clouded over.

His back to her, he began the codes to purge her memory of the Fowl Incidents.

"Don't worry, Foaly," said a small voice from behind him. He didn't turn around, but peered slightly over his shoulder, "it'll be better, once I forget. It's too hard to live with 'what could have been'."

bzzt

"But it didn't get better. Or at least, not in the end." Julius seemed to get older with each word her spoke, and he still had a few more to go, "We had to do another mind wipe on her. Her mind … maybe it was her heart. But she kept on trying to remember that Mud Boy. She tried to kill her self one night. Her memories came back to her as her near depleted magic tried to heal her. Someone was to come each afternoon and check on her. Her condition had been deteriorating for a few weeks now. Upon seeing the blood on the floor, on her clothing, her hands… and the smile on her lips, we healed her. And wiped her memory clean again. It happened again, but not on such a frightening level. She merely showed signs of … slipping again. We asked her the Operating Booth… and, rather unceremoniously, checked and deleted further memories. We didn't even let her remember the troll incident."

"When Artemis first… made contact?"

"Yes. And that was a very nice way of putting it, by the way."

"Then… then it all happened again, didn't it? Not just another relapse, but the whole damn thing… all over again."

Julius slowly turned to lock eyes with Juliet. When their eyes met, he nodded. Just as slowly.

A shadow passed over Juliet's face. She turned briskly heading towards Artemis' grave. He should have been her responsibility. She should have been the one to be evaporated in blue light.

Finally, she sobbed out her grief.

Upon reaching his tombstone, she fell to her knees.

Try to forgive, teach me to live,

Give me the strength to cry…

She wept on his tombstone, adding more water to the packed dirt below.

Juliet had fought the people to at least give her the benefit of having the two humans buried near to her.

Spittle gathered at the corners of her mouth, her eyes were red and wet. Her face was distorted, deformed, twisted in pain.

The pain of loss.

Some fairies scittered around her, averting their eyes from hers because it's just something that could scar. Enveloped in their somewhat fear of large Mud Men, they hurriedly gathered up their things. Wanting to leave at the first light.

Juliet had sought out Julius. The little man with the ugly cigar. She had demanded that they do something, everything that they could to make her wish come true.

The little man avoided her eyes, but gave in when Juliet fell to the ground in silence. For him, the silence was more frightening than her agonized screams. Silence already reminded him that Holly was never there again to bark back at him.

As she left the cemetery, the sky parted slightly and she threw a glance over her shoulder at the statue still with the fairy on its shoulder.

"You know where to find me. You know where I'll be." she said. Only when she turned to get a better last look at the commander did she see that there was a concrete fairy resting where his form had been.

Juliet turned again, started heading out the front gates. As she left the grounds, a melody tinkled its way into her mind, and she muttered the lyrics under her breath.

No more memories… no more silent tears,

Not more gazing across the wasted years…

Help me say good bye…

Help me say… good bye.

Fowl Manor

Juliet clambered up the stairs to her room. Dark, dismal, it befitted her mood after the graveyard encounter. After… many other things. She discarded the dripping blazer and skirt, kicked her shoes off into a corner, and slid the leather thong off her hair.

She sat in front of the vanity, running a comb through her wet, dark golden hair.

They would be there soon, with their whirring things and their cold, unknowing touches. They would be there soon, to take away her memories of something great. Of friends and of losses.

Maybe it would be better to forget, she thought to her self. Maybe I would be happier.

But another look into the mirror showed her that she would never again be happy. No matter what was forgotten or remembered.

Domovi was gone. And no amount of mind tweaking would fix that.

She put the silver handled comb down, and reached into a drawer for its replacement. She needed something else in her hands. Feeling in the dark of the compartment, her fingers found the silver and jade handle. She brought out her dagger, the shining blade catching the light.

Placing both hands on the knife, she raised it above her heart dramatically.

Hesitating a moment, she thought about how Holly had stormed out of the cell in a delirious rage, her jumper thrown over her shoulder. Domovi tried to stop her, but she brandished a knife at him, glaring him down.

This is none of your concern, old friend.

She remembered seeing the two together in Artemis' office; his eyes on hers. As if everything that needed to be said was there. She watched openly from the unclosed door as Holly dropped the dagger and slid her fingers up his arms, lacing her hands together behind his head. Juliet recalled feeling her jaw drop slightly as Artemis pulled the elf in closer, closer, closer…

Everything they both wanted.

And they were happy.

Juliet's blue eyes closed, and she remembered all of their names as she plunged the knife into her self and drew her last, gurgling breath.

It was the way that she wanted it; to go to them and remember who they are.

A shimmer out side of her window lingered, then flew off.

And then another frame scrolled into view.

The End

Dedicated To

Commander Julius Root

? – 2004

A Good Commander and Friend.

"Holy balls!" Holly exclaimed, her jaw hanging rather low, "I didn't think that they would be able to pull it off. I mean, I thought that it went on too long after the movie of the stupid this where you got us pinged," she hit the shoulder next to her at that remark, "but this was really good! What do you think?" she turned to a pale fifteen year old sitting beside her on the sofa.

"It was… interesting. To say the least." He raised a slim eye brow and popped another truffle into his mouth.

Fin-

A/N:… please don't hurt me. I know… this took too long… o.o I'm sorry. And the reason that the ending is such... is that I read the fourth book. SO. I didn't exactly PLAN for it to end like this… but… I still think that it's an amusing twist. I hope you enjoyed reading as much as I enjoyed writing.

And please celebrate with me; this is the first time I've ever finished a chapter story that I started.

Now. To thank reviewers that more likely hate me by now:

Black Aliss: confusion isn't really a bad thing. O.o thank you for reading. :

I should be Studying: well… here you go? I know, it's not silver platter worthy, but humor me! –hands over on silver platter-

Marfbag: stucky stuck stuck – it got unstuck. Sort of. O.o it took a while… so… we'll say … . super glue?

Confused: well, I'm sorry…? I hope it's sort of explained… ish.

Orlandie: thank you for reading, and I'm sorry that the chapter was confusing…

Slime Frog: … just... please don't hurt me. and eyes are eyes. let's just pretend it worked.

Firefye 12: yay for new readers!

Thank you all for reading and … not killing me.

me