This story desperately needs an update, despite the fact that it's getting less attention than I would have wished it would, so here's more.
As usual, thanks to those who reviewed:
KitsuneAkai13 - Yeah, I got a black cat, and she's crazy...bulimic too, but that's another story. Anyway, I am glad you are going to put up with my insanity all the way, looking forward to your review!
animeprincess1452 - Heh, you find Dragonballs each day? That's too funny, I hope this chapter isn't something else you do every day, lol.
Nyberger13 - Well, I apologize for being so mean if you had such a good reason for not reviewing, and I am glad that you have done so. And yeah, Jake is pretty weird, but so is the author creating him, cough-cough...
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Chapter 3: December 1, 2002 - Lessons in Your Basic Kalltorraiya-jin Job Profile
The mid-afternoon sun beat down mercilessly onto my exposed body, and the sweat dripped rapidly down my brow, leaving little wet dots on the exposed metal of the machine, which quickly evaporated away in the heat. I wiped away the sweat and finished attaching an ominous looking green button to the pile of junkyard waste that was supposed to attract the Dragonball sitting on the ground next to it like some kind of freaky electromagnet. One might have wondered why I was wasting away this afternoon as well as hundreds of others over the past year making this, but I wasn't too sure myself. After some of the things that the Voice had told me, I wasn't too sure about much of anything anymore.
Why I was building this...this thing, was about the only thing I had not been told, in fact it was the one thing that would have most likely been the easiest to hold over the rest. I guess it isn't exactly something anyone else can claim, what with being an alien and all that, and some of the things I had learned of the history of the Kalltorraiya-jin, after learning I was one, and the Shishkan, whom were coming to Earth and I was going to have to fight, were enough to make my skin crawl. It wasn't that it was scary stuff, even though it might have been to most normal people, but everything I was told by that insane speechmaker in my head was confirming suspicions I already had about myself.
I think I have always known there was something different about me, I thought again to myself, reminiscing on my thoughts from the day that had started my path to my own insanity, the day I had heard the word "Dragonballs" for the first time.
"Well, are you sure this piece of crap is going to work?" I asked suddenly of the Voice, breaking the silence in my backyard, absent of all life except my own and a few ants crawling over my feet, as my mother was not home, so what else was new?
'Yes,' he responded after a time, 'if you have made it as I have told you it should service your purposes perfectly.'
This actually did little to reassure me, as I flicked on the switch and plugged in the old computer monitor, watching in mock amazement as the world map that I had programmed into it came up, flickering slightly, as well as seven blinking red dots on each of the continents. There was a slight hiss, and then something else broke and the screen went off. Like I should be surprised, it is all made from junkyard castoffs, it had broken several times already. Opening up the toaster oven and checking over the circuits soldered to the heating element, I realized that I had no idea what was wrong, and I reluctantly questioned the Voice about what to look for and how to fix it. In all sheer honesty, I don't know whether I should think him more or less credible now that I know what he really is. It has been said that the best teachers are the ones who have experienced what they teach, and I am sure that makes the Voice a very good one, having been one of the first Kalltorraiya-jin and having personally fought the Shishkan all those millions of years ago. Still, knowing that he was a real man, sitting somewhere in the dead world, or heaven, or whatever, telepathically communicating to me to help me save the world was weird.
Finishing the repairs, and after a few choice curses after I accidentally soldered my finger to the wire, it was all done, and this time it didn't break when I turned it on. Satisfied with the result, I looked at the dot on the North American continent and smiled as I realized it was blinking right at my present location. I grinned wider, and then threw the Dragonball across the yard and waited; the dot flickered, went out, and reappeared in the same place.
"It moved, I swear it did!" I said laughing.
'Let's be serious,' the Voice said, sounding a bit annoyed.
"So," I said my heart beating a little faster in apprehension, "is there anything else I need to know about the Kalltorraiya-jin, and stuff?"
After the last thing I was told, I realized that most of what it actually made a little sense, beyond all that Ki stuff, which I didn't understand why I couldn't use even though I was supposed to be a Kalltorraiya-jin. And green was my favorite, but thinking about glowing that color whenever I got pissed kind of made me laugh. Something about being part Kalltorran, which had blue Ki, and Saiya-jin - yellow Ki, made me green I guess, which could be explained either by codominance in genetics, or by simple color theory: yellow and blue makes green...
'Well, I'm not sure how you might take this next part,' the Voice said, sounding stressed for the first time ever, 'it's a little bit deep.'
Whatever; and what you haven't told me isn't? I questioned in my thoughts.
'It's about the way Kalltorraiya-jin reproduce; I just don't know how a testy teenager might take the news that he's actually completely sterile...'
That one I couldn't believe, it was just stupid. What was the point of having the most powerful species in the universe if they couldn't procreate? Besides, I was sure I could...not that I had ever actually tried, though I planned to some day, preferably with Katharine, of course.
"Alright, I believe a lotta what you have told me, but that I can't. You see, when I was about 11 years old and I started puberty I suddenly was able to-" I started to say.
'Will you shut up and listen to me!' the Voice said, interrupting me. 'Look, I'm sorry it sucks to be you, but believe me when I say I know how it feels; denial is normal in your case. It's just the way things work, when you breed a horse and donkey, you get a mule, which is powerful but sterile. The same holds true for Saiya-jin and Kalltorran offspring, which doesn't matter as all Kalltorraiya-jin are male anyway, makes them more powerful and-'
"What?!" I shrieked, doing the interrupting this time. "Now you are saying I am of an entire race of homosexuals?!"
'Your sexual orientation is completely irrelevant you fool! We are wasting time, now shut up and listen for God's sake! Yes, all Kalltorraiya-jin are gay, but that isn't what we are discussing here, that doesn't matter based on what you have to do.'
"Whoa, hang on there cowboy, what about Katharine?" I asked, crossing my arms and looking defiant.
'Didn't I say something about denial...?'
"Cheh, damn worthless race, they can't even have kids!"
'I didn't say that, I just said 'sterile', stop putting words in my mouth!'
Now I was confused, how could you have children in an entire species of males?
'I know this is hard, a lot of things I have told you are, but just sit tight and listen to me. Besides, you know what that is like, you do remember, don't you?'
I did remember, but that was so long ago, and now things were different; we were just good friends now, I know it. I didn't want to remember what I did with him, because the last time we did...it was the worst day of my life. I hated that memory, hated that day, and I forced it away, holding the tears in with a concentrated burst of effort.
'Kalltorraiya-jin can have children, it's a complex process, but it's all about the Ki I have been telling you about. See, Ki is like a two sided coin, a good side and a bad side. It can be used for destruction, but Ki can also heal, and create life anew. I will spare you the details of Kalltorraiya-jin sexuality, but I can tell you that two of them can combine their Ki to create a child, something like an infantile fusion of both the fathers.'
"So, you are saying that they just touch hands and concentrate their Ki and 'poof' a baby just falls out of thin air, just like that?" I asked, fascinated.
'It's a little more complicated, but the process is much the same in basic concept. Now, enough of the biology lessons, back to the Dragonballs.'
I shrugged my shoulders, trying to forget what I had been told, as well as trying to forget my past -
David...
- and instead concentrated on turning on the machine. Patent number KJ - 3,507,029.
"Let's do this," I said and I flicked on the last switch. There was a hum and instantly the Dragonball flew across the yard and attached itself the cone on top of the machine, nearly beaning me in the head in the process.
Whoa, that was close! I thought.
I looked back at the screen and saw the dots start moving faster and faster heading precisely to my present location on the map.
'HIT THE DIRT!' the Voice screamed.
I dove for the ground just as the first one crashed through the trees and hit the machine with a metallic clang. Seconds later, four more hit it after crashing through a neighbor's house, a streetlight, a concrete wall, and a bird feeder hanging off the patio roof at probably better than ten-thousand miles per second leaving perfect round holes, and scattering bird-seed everywhere.
Holy shit! It's a good thing my neighbors are not home! I thought, standing up.
I then noticed there were only six Dragonballs on the machine. Using my better discretion, I dove down again just as the seventh and final one flew through a solid five-foot thick rock again leaving a perfect round hole and stuck next to the rest. I switched it off and watched the seven Dragonballs fall to the ground. I looked them over; minus the one I had found, there were six others, each with stars in the center like the one I had with three. The others had one, two, four, five, six, and seven stars, respectfully. Taking this apparent miracle with a grain of salt, as well as silently thanking myself that I had gone pee before I had undertaken this, I asked the Voice what to do next, and was told to press the button that I had put on more carefully than the rest, wired to some explosives and labeled 'Do Not Push!' I didn't want to destroy that which I had spent so long working on, but I was assured that it was imperative that nobody else ever use this machine. Something about wishing and screwing up everything we had done, and would do, but I wasn't sure on the details.
I pressed it and stepped back, watching through squinted eyes as it blew into a few pieces and I lugged them into the trash after making sure that the circuitboards were all fried to nothing.
Walking back to the Dragonballs, I realized that they were sitting in the wrong formation, and rolled them into the right position, taking a step back as they started to blink a glowing yellow, accompanied by a strange sound, indicating they were in the right place.
"Now what?" I asked, looking upward as if to see the face of the Voice in the sky.
'This part's easy. Summon the Dragon!'
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