Chapter 2 – Reading the Manual is Against the Law
Previously…
"So… who goes first?" asked Kurt.
"WE GOT DIBS!" said Eddie and ReyAnyway…
Eddie and Rey were perched on the couch in front of the TV, grinning like lunatics. They were clutching their PS2 controllers, and looked like two six-year-old boys. Everyone else looked at them oddly, as if fearing for their sanity.
"Turn it on, holmes!" said Eddie to no one in particular.
"Kurt, turn it on!" said Rey to someone in particular.
"Christy, turn it on before these two wet themselves," Kurt said wearily to Christy.
"Trish, if you don't mind," said Christy, pleading.
"I don't know how either, honey. Torrie?"
"Nope. John?"
"I don't know how, man." All heads turned to Chris.
"Chris?" asked the other seven.
Chris went to the PS2 and pressed the on switch.
"How did you know that?" asked Kurt.
"I read the manual," said Chris, as nonchalantly as possible.
Everyone gasped.
"Y-you read the m-manual?" exclaimed a shocked Rey.
"B-but no one reads those things!" gasped Torrie.
Everyone kept quiet after, but kept on giving Chris weird looks.
"So what do we play first?" Eddie asked Rey.
"I dunno… tag-team match?" suggested Rey with a manic glint in his eyes.
"YEAH!" They gave each other high-fives, and did some sort of a victory dance which earned themselves weird looks from everyone else in the room.
"I knew they were going insane," said Chris to Trish under his breath.
"I heard that, evil manual-reader!" said Eddie, pointing dramatically at Y2J, who just sighed, rolled his eyes, but said nothing else.
"Right," said Rey, who got his controller and glanced at the TV excitedly. "Who do we play against?" he asked his partner… er, ex-partner, if we follow the storyline.
"I dunno… let's check the players, then…" said Eddie.
Apparently, the game was ©2004, so many players were not included in the rosters of Raw and SmackDown!.
"I'm not there yet!" wailed Christy.
"Yeah. MNM aren't there either," Trish pointed out.
"So who do we play against, then?" asked Rey.
Suddenly, a light bulb appeared over Eddie's head, which meant that he had a fantabulous idea – and that's saying something, seeing as fantabulous isn't even a word.
"Rey-rey," he whispered to Rey, "let's put Kurt and JBL in the other team. You know that even without the storyline, they fight a lot… I feel like annoying Kurt today. You know what I mean, ese?"
After Eddie said this, both he and Rey got manic looks on their faces, which earned more weird looks (actually, I don't think Kurt was giving them a weird look; he just had too much prune juice to drink for breakfast).
Eddie and Rey entered their opponents, and when Kurt saw…
"Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!"
1 Minute Later…
"Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!"
"SHUT UP KURT!" yelled Chris.
"DON'T SHUT ME UP, MANUAL-READER!" bellowed Kurt.
"WHAT'S SO WRONG ABOUT READING THE MANUAL?" Chris bellowed back.
"Does he really expect us to answer that?" Trish asked Christy under her breath.
"I do!" said Chris, having heard what Trish whispered to Christy in a not-so-subtle way.
"I now pronounce you man and wife. You may now kiss my ass!" said John.
"Eeeew! No one wants to kiss that, John!" Christy said, giggling.
"Except perhaps Torrie," Trish said, a little more subtle this time.
"Hey, what's all the commotion?" asked Randy Orton, who had just entered with Stacy Keibler.
"Well, you see, we were all bored out of our wits," began Torrie.
30 Minutes Later, in Which Torrie Gives an Account of the Events in Immense Detail…
"And while we were at the shop, trying to buy the adaptor thingamajig, there was this senior who looked like a prune. And then Eddie goes, 'holmes, you look like a prune!' and then…"
By this time, everyone was asleep – except for Eddie and Rey, who played what was their… er… how many games had it been? Oh, right. One. Wait a minute! Only one game!
"Eddie, I still haven't figured out how to start the match," said Rey.
"I haven't either, holmes. Real wrestling's easier than this, don't you agree, ese?"
"Yeah… Oh, wait! Look at that thingy on the screen. It's some sort of an X button, or something."
"You're right, Rey-rey! I wonder what it means…"
30 Minutes Later, in Which Torrie Continues Her Version of the Day's Events, While Rey and Eddie Have a Long Discussion Regarding the X Button…
"So anyway," said Torrie to a very much asleep Randy and Stacy, "Chris put the adaptor on the plug. And then, he put it in the socket over there. But then…"
As for Eddie and Rey…
"Maybe the X means we have to make these controller things look like the letter X?" asked Rey.
"Rey, I think we both know that's a little hard to do."
"Well, what do you think it means, then?"
"I don't know! Damn! Gone were the days when all we had to do was go to the GM and ask for a tag team match, or something!"
"Actually, we just followed what the scripts said. Now, however, there aren't any scripts to begin with!"
"I know, holmes, I know."
"Anyway, back to this X button…"
"Wait, Rey! There's a word beside the X!"
"Yeah! It says…" Rey squinted his eyes to read the word, "continue."
"Hmmm… what do you think it means?"
30 Minutes Later, in Which Everyone Finally Wakes Up, and Rey and Eddie Have Another Long Discussion…
"You guys haven't played yet, have you?" asked Kurt wearily. The two didn't answer him; they were so engrossed in their meaningless conversation about the letter X and it's connection with the word continue. Kurt made a noise of impatience; all the others were so sure that had he had hair at that time, he would have ripped all of it off.
Meanwhile, Rey looked at his controller. He noticed that there was a little X button that resembled the one on the screen.
"Hey Eddie!"
"What?"
"I think I know how to start the game already!"
"How did you find that out? No! Don't tell me! You read the manual as well, didn't you? NO! Jericho has corrupted you! No, Rey-rey, no! Where's the Rey-rey I knew and loved like a brother?"
"No, Eddie! I didn't read the manual! Look at the controller, there's a little X button that looks like the X on the screen! Maybe, just maybe, if we press it, we can continue and play the match!"
"It's crazy, but it might just be crazy enough to work!"
They pressed the X button, and…
3 Hours Later, in Which Everyone Else Got So Bored from Watching the Two Play That They Decided to Play Truth or Dare…
"Torrie, truth or dare?" asked Trish.
"Truth."
"Oooh! I've got a good one!" squealed Christy.
"What is it?" asked Trish. Christy whispered something in her ear.
"We already know they are, Christy! We don't have to ask her that!"
"Oh come on, Trish! Who knows, it might not be true!"
"Oh alright. Torrie," said Trish unenthusiastically, "what's going on between you and Cena?"
"We're together," Torrie said nonchalantly, before turning to Y2J.
"Chris, truth or dare?"
"Dare."
Everyone else huddled around Torrie and came up with the perfect dare for the so-called "manual-reader.
"Ok. Chris, I dare you to pull the plug on the PS2," Torrie said with a superior smirk on her face. Jericho paled; he knew that the two were going to kill him. However, he wasn't one to chicken out. So he went to the outlet, got the plug, and slowly removed it from the outlet…
"WHAT HAPPENED!" yelled Eddie; he looked furious.
"WHY'D IT TURN OFF!" hollered Rey.
Both pairs of eyes turned to Chris, who was lurking behind the TV cabinet, thinking he was unseen.
"I'M GONNA GET YOU!"
"SAVE ME JESUS!" cried Y2J as he was chased by the PS2-addicted pair.
"Now this," said Stacy, "is more entertaining than any PS2."
OoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOo
A/N: Hey, thanks for the reviews.
So our favorite tag team finally got to play. Haha.
As always, a new chapter comes when more reviews do!