DISCLAIMER: I don't own anything of Harry Potter, sadly, it belongs to the wonderful JK Rowling.
Chapter 7:
Christmas was soon over and every one was back. Lily told me what had happened at her house- her sister had gotten engaged to some prick named Vernon Dursley- and I told her about Sirius and I having a conversation without killing each other. Sirius had actually been bearable to live with over the vacation, but as soon as his friends came back he was the same old Sirius again. Too bad.
"So, are you and Black past the whole killing each other thing, then?" Lily asked, as we sat in the common room the night before classes started again.
"I don't know." I sighed, shaking my head. "I hope so."
"Well, at least you guys are making progress!" Lily said, brightly. I smiled at her.
"Alright, projects are due today. Who would like to present first?" Professor McGonagall said, as we sat down in class. It was the end of January. "No volunteers? Very well, then, how about Miss Star and Mister Black."
I sighed as I walked up to the front of the class. I had given Sirius my notes so that he could at least be prepared. I guess I wasn't as heartless as I wanted to be. Besides, if he did poorly that meant he'd drag my grade down.
"Alright, well, we had to look up the ways to transfigure a book into a goblet, a rock into a bird cage, a bird into a mirror, and a chair into a dog." Sirius began, handing McGonagall my notes. "And, uh, we found 'em all."
"See, the way you do the book into the goblet is flicking the wrist like this and saying transfiguro booko." I continued, rescuing Sirius, and demonstrating the spell. "Actually they were all pretty much the same except for the incantation and sometimes a slight wand movement change. The only twist was that you had to have the wand movements just right or it won't work. "
"Very good, you two. We'll have you demonstrate the actual spell tomorrow." McGonagall said, looking impressed. "Okay, who's next?"
We got through everyone during class and I was just happy the project was over. Now, maybe I could relax some. Or at least get my mind onto some other class.
That night I went up to the Astronomy tower, with the book that Remus gave me for Christmas, and I sat on the roof reading. I looked up every so often at the night sky, wishing that I was someone else- anyone else. I didn't want to have my destiny all planned out for me, like some road map. I mean, I don't think anyone would. The fact was, I didn't even know the whole prophecy. Maybe my parents did and they wrote it down in their journals. I would have to go through those tomorrow night. I didn't want to be a chosen one, especially if that meant that everyone that I was close to got hurt. Not only were my parents dead because of me, I been to hell and back with all the foster homes I'd went to. If I wasn't being neglected, I was being beaten and told how worthless I was. I'd given up on actually believing that anyone would ever actually care about me. I mean, Lily was great and I loved her, but I didn't want her to get hurt, too. I wouldn't be able to live with myself if anything happened to her…I soon fell asleep lost in my thoughts of how unfair life was.
"Hey, what are you doing up there?" A voice asked, waking me up. I opened my eyes groggily; it was still night. I looked down and saw the Marauders.
"Sleeping, what does it look like?" I replied, sitting up.
"You know, you could have fallen off and killed yourself." Sirius said, matter-of-factly.
"Ah, Black, I didn't know you cared so much." I said, in a fake honeyed voice. He smirked at me.
"I don't, Starr. I was merely stating that it would do the world a lot of good if you had." He shot back. I disregarded the comment.
"Well, I guess that's too bad for you." I said, looking down at him. "What are you guys doing up here?" I asked.
"Stuff." James said. Typical guy response.
"Oh, well, that clears it all up." I said, sarcastically. "What time is it anyways?"
"Midnight."
"Okay, well, I'm going to bed now. Hope you guys get caught by Filch." I replied, jumping down lightly from the roof to the balcony, where they were standing. "'Night."
I walked back to the common room, wondering what they could possibly be doing up at the Astronomy tower at midnight. I shrugged and kept on walking. I was so caught up in my thoughts, that I wasn't watching were I was going and I bumped right into someone. I looked up and saw Snape. Oh great, just what I need.
"I told you we would meet again." He sneered. "And here we are."
"Get the fuck outta my way, I'm in no mood for you." I snapped, glaring at him.
"Tut, tut, you need to learn some nicer language." He said, mockingly. He reached out and tried to grab my arm. I pulled back instinctively.
"Don't you dare try to touch me, you grease ball." I said, evenly. Then I punched him and turned and ran all the way back to Gryffindor tower. I didn't breathe safely until I was in my bed.
The next day, I tried to avoid Snape at all costs. I didn't even want to look at his revolting face. I didn't even want to think about what he could do to me if I wasn't able to avoid myself. I also tried to keep my mind off of Sirius, but that didn't seem to be happening. I don't know why he always kept popping up in my mind. No matter what I just couldn't stop thinking about him. What was the matter with me?
"Hey, Jules, what's up? You look like your mad or something." Lily asked, as we walked to Defense Against the Dark Arts.
"Huh? Oh, it's nothing, I was just thinking." I replied, absent-mindedly.
"You sure?" She asked, not convinced.
"Yeah." I said, putting a smile on my face. "Positive.
That evening was Qudditch practice. Derek did indeed run a tight team. We practiced plays and formations until they were perfect and as a result we hadn't lost a game yet. We were going into the final match before the Qudditch Cup finals and Derek was going insane because of it. We had morning practices, evening practices, and weekends were devoted to refining our team vibe. Sirius and I had managed to put our differences aside when playing and we maintained a professional, business like disposition during practices and games alike.
"C'mon, Jules, You shouldn't be dropping the Quaffle like that! What's the matter with you?" Derek yelled at me during one of the ungodly morning practices. It was only four-thirty, for gods sake!
"Maybe it's because I've been sleep deprived!" I said, although not loud enough for Derek to hear. James, however, heard and smiled slightly at my sarcastic outlook on the morning practices.
We ran the play again. I tried my best to wake up and catch the Quaffle, but it didn't work. If only Derek were a sane normal person, then I'd be in bed, still dreaming of not being up this early. But, no, here I was out in the cold frosty morning air, being chewed put by a crazed Qudditch captain.
"Jules, get it together! If you don't shape it up, then I just might have to replace you with a reserve!" He shouted. If anything that just pissed me off. I wasn't the only one who was half asleep out here- Mike, the fourth year chaser, was practically falling off his broom and the other beater, a fourth year girl named Sunny, kept hitting herself with her bat instead of bludgers. Yet, Derek still found some reason to single me out.
"Derek, I'm not the only one who's not playing up to par here! Why don't you just relax and realize that I'm doin the best I can considering I'm playing on three hours of sleep here." I snapped at him. He flew over to me, angry.
"I thought I told the whole team that to be in bed by nine every night! What the hell were doing?" He asked, furiously.
"Some of us have loads of homework to do and the fact that I spend every waking moment down here I used the time that should've been spent sleeping catching up on my classes. Maybe if you lightened up just a bit I wouldn't be so behind!" I retorted.
"James and Sirius are in the same year as you and they seem to have no problem keeping up. Maybe you're just somehow totally fucked up! And I can't have this attitude, not if we're seriously going to win the cup this year!" He spat at me. I was taken aback by this response. As was everyone else on the team.
"Derek, man, relax, take a couple of deep breaths." James said, looking shocked.
"James, stay out of this! She needs to understand that what I say goes! I'm the captain of this team and you had better shape up!" He shouted in my face. "You had better give me some respect!"
"Hey, ya know what? You have to give respect to get it, dude!" I said. I couldn't believe he was acting like this! He had totally and completely snapped.
"Look, Jules, I don't really care about what you have to say. You're a player on this team and that means listening and following the rules that I lay down. This is my team and I won't have you mess it up just because you balance school and practice" He said, evenly, anger apparent in his voice. "If you don't like the way I do things, there's the ground and the exit."
"You know what, you're right." I said, and he looked pleased with himself for a moment. "I don't like the way you run this team. And all I have to say is good luck winning the cup with a reserve!"
With that I landed and walked off the Qudditch pitch. I didn't look back. Who the hell did Derek think he was? Did he honestly think that I was just going to take that lying down? I realize that I might've been a tad out of line, but he was too. I wasn't going to be pushed around by anyone- not anymore.
"Hey, why aren't you at practice?" Lily asked as I sat down next to her at breakfast a couple of hours later. I'd gone up and taken a long shower and then I just walked around aimlessly for a while.
"I quit." I replied, simply. Lily looked at me as if I'd lost my mind.
"WHAT?" She yelled. "Why?"
"'Cause Derek Hoppler's an ass-hole." I said. I explained what had happened.
"Jules, he's just under a lot of stress! C'mon, you don't really want to quit the team do you?" She said, after I was done. "I mean, yeah, he was wrong to yell at you, but that doesn't mean you had to quit."
"Lily, look, I wasn't about to let him walk all over me. I've let enough people do that to me through out my life, but not any more." I said.
"Alright, Jules, whatever you say." She said, throwing her hands up in defeat. "You know, you really are impossible."
"Thanks."
I went through my classes, ignoring all of the ridiculous rumors going around. I heard one going around about how I had threatened to curse everyone on the team and now I wasn't even allowed to go to the games. What a load of bullshit! I mean, honestly, how thick can people actually be? Anyways, I was in a pretty bad mood by the time I went down to dinner. James and Sirius came in somewhat late; a break for dinner and then back to the pitch, I assumed. They came over to where Lily and I were sitting and plopped down next to us.
"Jules, we need to talk to you." James said, he and Sirius both looking extremely harassed. I almost felt kinda bad for them. Almost.
"Okay, so talk." I said, shortly.
"You have to some back!" Sirius burst out. I looked at him surprised. "Look, Derek's sorry that he shouted at you this morning, but he's gonna gone on killing spree pretty soon if you don't come back!"
"Well, that's his problem." I replied, turning back to my dinner. "I'm not taking his shit anymore!"
"Please, Jules, just come back and talk to Derek. He's a lot saner than he was this morning. And he really wants you to come back."
"Funny, seeing as I was the only one he'd been singling out at practice." I said dryly.
"He was just venting some steam off and you happened to be the one he vented on." James said, while Sirius looked like he wanted to strangle me. "At least just think about it."
"Fine, I'll think about it." I said, and they looked somewhat relieved. "But I'll tell you this, I'm not playing in the match against Ravenclaw. You can just forget that." I added, and they looked me in horror.
"But you have to! We'll be smashed!" Sirius said, loudly, barely containing himself from lunging at me.
"Why won't play?" James asked, more calmly than Sirius.
"Let's just say I need to see that you guys actually need me before I can even consider coming back." I said, standing up. "Oh, and let Derek know that I'm disappointed that he couldn't come talk to me himself." I added, before walking away.
On Saturday when it was time for the match I walked down to the Qudditch pitch with the rest of the school. James was looking at me hopefully, as though I was going to play, and Sirius was throwing me death glares. I kept on walking and took a seat with Lily. The game started and it wasn't a pretty sight. My replacement was some second year that obviously had no idea what he was doing. All of his passes were intercepted and he dropped the Quaffle every time it was passed to him. Gryffindor won only because our seeker, Sam, caught the snitch early on in the game. Let's just say that any doubt I had about going back to the team were now gone. They would probably forfeit if I didn't go back. But there was no reason I couldn't mess with them a little bit more.
"Nice game guys." I said, walking into the locker room. They all looked up at me.
"Please, just come back!" The second year squealed, latching himself onto me. It took all the control I had not to laugh.
"Why would I come back when you guys obviously play much better without me." I said, innocently. They all looked at me incredulously.
"Please tell me you're joking." Derek said, looking as if I just signed his death wish.
"Yes, I'm joking. I'll come back." I said, with a smile. "I'm sorry about not being more cooperative." I added, seriously.
"And I'm sorry for acting like an insane captain." He replied. The rest of the team looked extremely relieved that I was coming back. And I was glad I was too. I was starting to get bored.
After that, things went back to normal. Derek and I got along and we were playing better than ever. We had a really good chance at the Qudditch cup. Nothing was gonna stop us!
"So, we are going to try a color changing charm today." Professor Flitwick said to us one day. "I will be pairing you up, so listen closely! Black and Pettigrew, Lupin and Evans, Potter and Starr, Johnson and Levi, Donaldson and Sierra, Wilson and Anderson."
I walked over to where James was sitting and we set to work. HE didn't really get how to do it and I was waiting to show him the correct way. But he kept on refusing, insisting that this time he would get it right. By the time I finally convinced him to let me take over, he'd set my hair on fire, made it disappear, and turned it into a bunch snakes like Medusa.
"I usually get the hang of this stuff pretty quickly." James said, frowning in confusion. "Sorry about your hair." He added, apologetically.
"It's okay," I replied, making the snakes disappear. "Let me show you how to do it."
"Okay, if you think you can." He said, doubtfully. I merely smiled an evil smile and proceeded with the charm.
"Couleur changer rose!" I said, waving my wand about uselessly. The charm still worked, though. James now had a mop of messy hot pink hair. "That color suits you, James."
"Very good, Miss Starr! Very good indeed!" Flitwick cried. I felt myself smile with satisfaction. Charms was one thing I could do without a problems.
"Ha, ha very funny." James said, looking at his new hair color darkly. "Now change it back."
"You take the fun outta everything." I said, playfully. "Reverso Couleur."
"Okay, now teach me how to do it." He said, crossing his arms. "Please?" He added as I glared at him.
"All you have to do it say the incantation right." I replied, putting my wand down.
"Cooler shanga rose!" He said, his accent atrociously British. I laughed at him- really laughed. I laughed so hard that I was crying and gasping for breath. It was just so funny to hear the French incantation said so wrongly! After a few minutes I was able to speak again.
"I'm sorry, James. That was just so funny!" I said, slowing my breathing down to a normal pace. "Okay, the incantation, which is French, is said like this: Cou-leur chan-ger rose!" I said, sounding it out for him.
"Coo-ler chan-ga rose!" He said, trying to imitate my accent and waving his wand. The ends of my hair turned a light faint pink. "Look, something happened!"
"Yeah, that was much better." I said, nodding. "But, you have to really nail the incantation and the wand movement has to be just so. Like this- Couleur changer vert!" I said, forgetting my wand and waving my hand out of habit. James' hair turned bright green this time.
"How'd you do that without a wand?" He asked, looking at himself in the mirror. Everyone else in the class had stopped what they were doing and were now looking at us.
"Um, well, actually I can do wandless magic." I muttered, looking at the floor.
"Then why do use a wand?' He pressed on, looking confused.
"'Cause it makes things easier." I replied. "At least at my old school it probably would have. People there didn't like anyone or anything that was too different."
"Oh, well, if you don't need a wand then don't use it. It doesn't really make a difference here, not to anyone who cares." James said, waving off my "weirdness" with his hand. I felt relieved, like I'd been proven wrong about him. I guess I had been.
The Qudditch Cup was the first Saturday in March and we had only a month to perfect some secret plays, as well as run the ones we usually used just to make sure that we were staying in shape. We still had the ungodly morning practices and evening practices that went till midnight, but we were tighter than ever. Derek had lightened up quite a bit and I cut him some slack. There was no doubt that we would definitely win the cup.
February brought with not only endless Qudditch practices, but Valentine's Day as well. Gag me please. I mean, the only reason Valentine's Day exists is so that the chocolate and flower companies can make a profit. Oh and to make all the people who have no one even more aware of that fact. I refer to Valentine's Day as Single's Awareness Day (SAD). Many people agree with me in this viewpoint.
On Valentine's Day owls flew in weighed down by the heavy packages of candy and flowers. All that could be heard in the Great Hall were girls squealing and all that could be seen were couples making out. At least until the teachers came and broke up their PDA's. Surprisingly though, I got a package. It was a single red rose and box of chocolates. With there was a note:
Jules-
Roses are red,
Violets are blue,
Even the most beautiful creature
Couldn't hold a candle to you
If you want to know who this is, meet me in the Entrance Hall at 7:30 tonight.
"What's that?" Lily asked, looking over at me. I handed her the note, too shocked to say anything. Who would want to send me anything on Valentine's Day?
"Oh, well, I'm surprised that you don't have more like this." She said, when she was done reading it. I looked at her incredulously.
"What's that suppose mean?" I asked her.
"Oh, c'mon Jules. Don't tell me that you haven't seen the way that half of the guys here stare at you." She said, shaking her head.
"They do not!"
"Oh yes they do. Guys are always checking you out." She replied, trying to hide her smile. She wasn't doing a very good job.
"And, pray tell, why would they be checking me out?" I asked, skeptically.
"'Cause you're gorgeous, of course!" She said as though it were the most obvious thing in the world. "You can't deny it."
Me, gorgeous? I think not. I mean I have a mess of waist length brown hair that never cooperates. My eyes, when not showing off my emotions, are a deep green that do sparkle, but they're not spectacular. I'm not the skinniest person in the world, but I'm not fat either. I'm thin in a healthy way, I'm kinda curvy, and I stand at about 5'8. But I'm not pretty. At least I don't think so. Lily obviously begged to differ.
"Lily, I am so not gorgeous! I'm just an average girl who loses her temper way too easily." I replied.
"Think what you want Jules, but the fact remains- Half the male population wouldn't mind a date with you." Lily said, holding her hands up.
"Whatever." I muttered.
"So are you going to meet this secret admirer?" She pressed on after a second.
"I don't know." I sighed. "I never had this problem at Polk. There I knew that everyone hated me."
"Well, I think you should. You never know, he might be really great." She continued, nudging me. I thought about this.
"You know what, Lily? I think I will go and meet this dude." I said, a smile forming on my lips.
I spent the rest of the day waiting for classes to be over. But, the day seemed to drag on. I kept wondering who this guy was and if I'd like him. I also wondered if it was a joke. I guess I would find out tonight.
"Stop fidgeting! You're getting on my nerves!" Lily said me, as we sat in History of Magic.
"I can't help it. I fidget all the time; I've never been able to sit still. And it's even worse when I'm nervous or excited and I'm both right now." I replied, as the bell finally rang.
"So, who do you think it is?" Lily asked.
"I don't know, but I hope I like him." I said, as we walked out of the classroom.
"Like who?" Came a voice from behind me. I turned and saw Sirius.
"None of you business." I said, rolling my eyes.
"Oh, does someone have a secret admirer?" James asked, in fake interest. "Maybe he's staying a secret 'cause he doesn't want people knowing that he likes someone like you."
"Fuck off, Potter." I snapped, angrily.
"Why, James, how do you know that he even exists. I mean, who would be able to like something like that?" Sirius added, as he and James laughed. I spun around, surprising both of them.
"What the hell is your problem? Huh?" I yelled. I didn't care if I was making a scene, I was sick of all their shit. "What have I done to you? Why can't you guys just leave me alone and grow up? You are the biggest shit-heads I've ever met!" I stormed off, with Lily right behind me.
"Jules-" She began, but I cut her off.
"Just me away from them, Lily. 'Cause I might kill them if I'm anywhere near them in the next twenty four hours!" I said, and she just nodded. I didn't stop until I got to the Common Room.
I picked up a book and threw it across the room. Where did those two get off insulting me endlessly and making me feel even more insecure about myself than I already did? Just because they had sluts and whores throwing themselves at them didn't mean they had the god given right to go around like they were the kings of the world. Stupid ass holes.
"Jules, are you okay?" Lily asked, tentatively. I looked at her.
"Yeah, I'll be fine." I said, feeling my anger subside a little. "I just don't know why they have to be such pricks!"
"'Cause they're Potter and Black. If they acted any other way, no one would what to do." She replied, shrugging. I laughed.
"Lils, you always know how to make me feel better. That's what I love about you." I said, smiling. She smiled back.
At seven fifteen I left the Common Room. I made my way down to the Entrance Hall, my stomach in knots. I couldn't help but be extremely nervous about it. How was I suppose to act? What was I suppose to say? I thought about this all the way. When I got there all I saw was a rose taped to the banister with a note. It said:
Follow the path of rose buds and there you'll find me
I opened the doors and saw a path of rose buds leading towards the lake. I walked down there and as I got closer I saw a tall figure standing on a rock overlooking the lake. My stomach gave a lurch; something wasn't right, I could feel it. When I got close enough to see the figure up close, I saw that it wasn't a person, but a manican. I looked around for anyone trying to pull something. And then-
"AHHHHHHH!" I heard a voice yell. I lost my balance and I fell into the lake. When I came to the surface I saw two people doubled over in laughter. Even though I couldn't see them, I knew who it was by their laughter. It was Potter and Black.
A/N: well, how's that for a cliff hanger! I hope you guys are all enjoying this! I would just like to say thanks to all my reviewers- you guys are truly apprciated!