Disclaimer: I still don't own the Gilmore Girls. Although, I wish I owned Luke and Jess.

Chapter 18

Lorelai opened the front door to find Rachel, Emily, and Patty on the other side. "Oh great, you're here," Lorelai smiled. "Come on in."

"We're not late are we?" Rachel asked.

"No, you're right on time. Sookie's been here since five thirty because we broke ground today."

"Broke ground for what?" Emily asked.

"Luke and I decided to add two more rooms to the house before Christmas."

"You made a hole in the wall that will let in the cold, wintry air while it's snowing? How much is it going to cost? It must cost extra to have two rooms built in less than a month."

"Uh...how about we get started now? Rory, Sookie, Babette, Liz we're starting!" Lorelai said, steering the conversation away from a money topic. As soon as the others joined them, they took seats and started to talk about wedding details, starting with the engagement party.

"All in favor for the engagement party to be at my studio, say 'I'," Patty said.

"I," everyone said.

"Whoa," Luke said as he walked into the room, toolbox in hand. "Sounds like I just walked into a town meeting. Good morning ladies."

"Morning Luke," they all greeted.

"Hey sweetie, what's the prognosis?" Lorelai asked.

"You broke the washer."

"I did not!"

"A pair of ladies underwear somehow found its way into the gears, short circuiting the washer."

"How do you know they weren't Rory's underwear?"

"I've seen your underwear enough times to know if they were yours or not."

"So what now? Can you fix it? Do we buy a new washer? Or do we just stop washing our clothes, become nudists, and run around town naked?"

Luke stared awkwardly at Lorelai. "What is this obsession with you and being naked?"

"Oh come on Luke. Don't be shy. You look great naked."

"Ah jeez. We can't afford a washer so I'll have to figure something out. Did Jess go outside?"

"Jess is still upstairs in his room," Rory replied.

"What? He should've been outside an hour ago." Luke put his toolbox down and went upstairs.

"Ok ladies, back to business," Lorelai said. "Let's hear from Rachel. Sookie after that. Then Patty and Babette. Liz after them. Mom is next. And finally, Rory and I will go over what we have."

"The pictures I have of you and Luke are looking good. We'll need to do a photo shoot for the picture we're going to blow up and I'll need pictures for the montage," Rachel replied.

"I need you and Luke to pick a flavor for the cake and icing and a list of the type of food you want me to serve. I can have a food test ready for you, Luke, Rory, and your parents at least a week after I get the list."

"Sounds good. Luke and I will work on a list tonight."

"Quit pushing me," Jess said as Luke pushed him down the stairs. "I'm going already."

"You're lucky I'm not pushing you off the roof. I told you to go outside and help T.J. and Jackson an hour ago," Luke barked.

"You're the one that woke me up at five thirty to swing a stupid sledgehammer at the wall."

"How about I swing a sledgehammer at your head? You have fifteen minutes to get dressed and on that roof!"

"Whatever. I'm getting my laundry from the laundry room."

Half an hour later, Logan joined Luke, Jess, Max, T.J., and Jackson on the roof. In the living room, Emily had just finished explaining her ideas on how the Russian theme would look. Now it was Rory's turn to speak.

"I've been bugging Mom and Luke to make a decision on the color of the wedding and they have finally made up their minds. The lovely couple has chosen an elegantly soft, powder-ish baby blue. It won't look bad in the snow and it'll bring out their eyes. We begin the dress and gown search next week and once we have the fabric picked out, I'll give a sample to Jess and Luke will take the men to find tuxes. I am now going to turn the floor over to the bride."

"Thank you Rory. There are a few things I want to touch face on. Mom, I really like the Russian theme idea," Lorelai commented.

"But," Emily prompted.

"But we're going to have to keep it a little simpler than what you have. I just don't think we're going to be able to afford everything you have in mind."

"Your father and I will be able to afford it."

"I know, but Luke and I were thinking of paying for the whole wedding ourselves…"

"It's customary for the bride's parents to pay for the wedding."

"Yeah, but you see. Luke…"

"Your father and I are going to pay for the wedding," Emily stated strongly.

Lorelai was about to speak, but was interrupted by a thud coming from the roof, followed by what sounded like sliding. "Ah!!" someone screamed from the roof.

Luke slowly made his way across the roof to grab a tool from his toolbox. T.J. stood up when Luke was right behind him and accidentally bumped into him. Luke fell with a thud and started to slide toward the edge of the roof. "Ah!!" he screamed.

"Hurry! Grab him!" Jackson yelled.

"There he goes!" T.J. said as Luke slid past Max.

"He's going over the edge!" Jess yelled, moving as fast as he could without falling. It was too late, Luke slid over the side of the roof. He didn't fall. He hung there upside down. "Pull him up!"

Max and Logan ran to the edge of the roof and tried to help Luke. "I'm trying!" Max said.

"Would someone pull me back up? The blood is rushing to my head!" Luke yelled.

"His pants are stuck in the rain gutter!" Logan remarked. "He's gotta take his pants off.

"Luke, you have to take your pants off," Jess yelled down.

"What?!? I am not taking off my pants!" Luke stated.

"You have to. Your pants are caught in the rain gutter. You're not going to fall. Jackson and T.J. are going to hold you up by your boots." Jess turned to the other men. "Ok, Logan and Max, I need you guys to pull Luke's pants up and off while Jackson and T.J. hold him up by his feet. I'm going to go down there and when his pants are off, slowly ease him down. Got it?"

"We got it. Just get down there so we can get this over with," T.J. replied.

Jess climbed down the side of the house. Jackson and T.J. grabbed Luke's boots and Logan and Max grabbed his pant legs. Luke felt ridiculous. He was hanging upside down from the roof with two men holding onto his pants, two other men holding him up by his boots, and his nephew getting ready to catch him while he was undoing his belt buckle and the button to his jeans.

Luke suddenly felt himself slipping out of his boots. Before he could say anything, he fell out of his boots and onto the porch rail, somehow taking Jess out in the process- probably by some flying piece of the porch or Luke's falling legs. He climbed out of the bush, wearing nothing but his baseball cap, flannel shirt, his socks, and underwear. He walked into the house, not wanting any of the neighbors see him.

"I was thinking…oh dear Lord!" Lorelai gasped when she saw Luke. All the girls looked up at Lorelai and then at Luke, their mouths dropping open in shock.

"Luke! Where are your pants?" Lorelai asked as she ran over to him. "And why is there dirt all over your shirt?"

"Out there I think," Luke replied. He took off his shirt, not realizing the committee was still in the living room. "I fell off the roof and ended up in the bush. I fell onto the porch rail too. And I think I may have knocked out Jess."

"Well, now I see why Lorelai is always smiling," Patty whispered to Babette, Rachel, Emily, Liz, and Rory as she looked at Luke.

"He's chiseled like a marble statue!" Babette added. "Look at those abs!"

"That's my step-father!" Rory said, shielding her eyes.

"That's my brother," Liz said in disgust.

Luke's head shot up when he heard Babette and he froze. Lorelai tried to cover Luke up as much as possible. "Luke, honey, why don't you go upstairs and put some clothes on?" she suggested.

Luke simply nodded and ran upstairs. He felt like an idiot. He was just standing half naked in front of a wedding committee that included two of the town's biggest gossipers and even worse- his future mother-in-law.

Dean headed up the front porch and stopped when he saw Jess sitting in a chair with an ice pack on his head. "Luke fell off the roof and took me out in the process," Jess explained.

"This is the second time I've seen you at this house. Are you and Rory back together?"

"If we were, her boyfriend would be mighty angry." Jess put the ice pack down and slowly headed toward Dean. "He's the blonde guy on the roof. He comes from a world we know nothing about. A world her grandparents accept. So don't get any ideas. Leave Rory alone."

"Practice what you preach."

"You've lost your mind."

"You planning to play mind games with this guy too? Get him to believe you're just Rory's friend and then take her away for the poor sap right? That is how you play the game right?"

"You don't know what you're talking about."

Luke stepped outside and spotted the two men. "Is there something going on here?" he asked.

Neither Jess nor Dean spoke at first. "Everything's fine," Jess replied.

"Dean?"

"What he said," Dean said.

"Good. I'm glad you ran into each other. Tom and I are splitting the workers in half and each team will work on a room. You boys are gonna be on the same team." Jess and Dean started to complain which angered Luke. "You two are going to work together and that is final."

"Good morning men," Richard greeted as he walked up the pathway with a folder in his hands.

"Morning Richard," Luke greeted.

"Why don't we go inside so we can talk?"

"Sounds good to me." Luke opened the door for Richard and escorted him into the house, then to the living room. Patty and Babette had gone home already, leaving Rory, Emily, Rachel, and Liz.

"Hey Dad," Lorelai greeted.

"Hello Lorelai. Good morning ladies. Hello Emily," Richard smiled.

"Hello Richard," Emily smiled back. "I didn't know you were coming today."

"I was going to talk to Luke about a few things we need to get in order. I was also hoping to hear about this wedding I'll be paying for."

"Oh. I'm glad you came then."

"So am I." Everyone watched as the elder Gilmores continued to smile at each other.

Lorelai looked at Luke and gave him a there's-something-going-on-between-them look as they sat down. "Daddy," Lorelai called. "Luke and I were originally planning to pay for the whole wedding ourselves, but Mom said you guys were paying for it. We really don't want to be in debt with you guys for the first years of our marriage."

"Lorelai, you and Luke don't worry about a thing. You two save your money for something more important. Your mother and I will take care of this wedding," Richard said. "With all the construction going on, it might be a smart idea if you, Luke, and Jess stayed somewhere else."

"With Rory coming home every weekend and her winter break just around the corner, there isn't really a place big enough to go," Luke remarked.

"What about the old house?" Liz suggested. Luke's head shot up and he stared at his sister. "Buddy and Maisy still own the property, the house is in order, and all the utilities are working."

"You mean we could see the house Luke grew up in?" Rory asked. Her eyes lit up in excitement.

"No," Luke said, shaking his head. "We can't...no. If Jess stays with you, Lorelai, Rory, and I can stay in my old apartment."

"You know Jess won't agree to that," Liz remarked.

"You can always stay with us," Emily offered.

"That's a wonderful idea!" Richard said. "There's more than enough room at the house."

Lorelai eyed Luke dangerously, making him extremely uncomfortable. "Um...you know what? We'll just stay at my old house," Luke said.

"Suit yourself. On to business. Luke, I was hoping to get your signature on some paperwork."

"What paperwork?" Lorelai asked. "Dad, you're not drawing up a prenuptial are you?"

"Of course not. I'm talking about the papers for the burial plans. We need to add Luke to the list of names for the family crypt. Otherwise, he might not be buried there."

"They're standard papers saying he'll be buried with the rest of the Gilmore clan," Emily added.

Lorelai glanced over at Luke. His head was down and his knuckles were turning white from holding a fist. "Mom, Dad, I don't think this is the time for this conversation," she remarked.

"We're just trying to get this in order Lorelai," Richard remarked. "We asked you to talk to Luke weeks ago, but you insist on putting it off."

Lorelai winced when her father announced she had prior notice about the situation. This only fueled Luke's building anger. "We need more time to talk about it. Why don't you leave the papers here and we'll get them to you when we're done."

"I suppose we can do that. I guess we're done then." Richard sighed and stood to leave.

"Richard, do you think I could ride with you back to the house? I had the maid drop me off and I think she's still out running errands," Emily said.

"Of course." With that, Richard and Emily left, oblivious to Luke's initial reaction to the news.

Once they heard the front door shut, Lorelai turned to Luke. He was already looking up at her with a very displeased look. "Your family crypt?" he asked in a low, frustrated voice.

"Just let me explain," Lorelai pleaded. "I was going to tell you about this."

"When? When were you planning to tell me that your father drew up papers saying I'll be legally obligated to be buried in Hartford?"

"I didn't think he was going to bring the papers today."

"And that's supposed to make things better? Oh and another thing, we weren't going to talk about it. We're supposed to discuss it! Talking involves me actually agreeing to this insanity! Discussing means I can yell!"

"I'm sorry! Ok? I don't know what you want me to say. I didn't think you'd react like this. We moved my cousin Cecile to make sure you had a place in that crypt."

"Are you insane?!? You don't move someone out of their eternal resting place to make room for someone else! I was born in Stars Hollow. I was raised in Stars Hollow. I've lived in this God forsaken town my whole life! I always thought I'd die in Stars Hollow- most likely in the diner. Then I thought I'd be buried in Stars Hollow. And now you're telling me that you want the funeral guys to take my body to Hartford to be buried with a bunch of dead rich people! What did you expect Lorelai? Did you honestly think I'd take this well?"

"I don't know! Just…just stop yelling at me for a minute."

"Is this why your father keeps taking me out to go golfing? He is trying to turn me into him isn't he? That way he won't be so ashamed of his poor son-in-law!"

"I'm sorry already! I don't know what you want me to say or do. Just…please. Stop yelling."

"God Lorelai, you have to stop doing this. You have to stop making decisions without consulting me first. Just like that God damn double date you agreed to. Did you ask me if I wanted to go? No. You just went on ahead and said yes. You never stop to think about what I want. What's next Lorelai? Are you gonna make me be Chris's friend? Is he going to pop in and out of our lives because you feel sorry for him? News flash, I'm not gonna feel sorry for that dead beat!"

"Christopher will always be a part of our lives. He's Rory's father."

"I'm Rory's father! I helped raise that girl. Not him! Where was he when Rory graduated from junior high? Or from Chilton? We're getting married Lorelai. This has to be a fifty-fifty partnership or it's not going to work!" Lorelai was silent. "To hell with it."

"What?"

"To hell with it. To hell with the Gilmore family crypt. To hell with Hartford. To hell with this wedding. To hell with it all! Do whatever the hell you want Lorelai. Sign the papers or don't, it's not going to matter what I want. It never does." Luke headed for the front door. He stopped when he was behind Lorelai and leaned close to her ear. "What does my opinion matter any way? I just run a diner."

Luke grabbed his coat and stormed out of the house, slamming the door behind him. The second the door slammed, Lorelai broke down into tears and Rory, Liz, and Rachel rushed to her side. She was crying hysterically and pleading to God not to take Luke from her.

Lane walked over to Patty and poured her another cup of coffee. "Did I miss anything at the meeting?" Lane asked.

"Not really. We just did a progress report," Patty replied. "It's a shame your band won't be performing at the wedding."

"I know, but Lorelai asked me to be a bride's maid and I jumped at the chance. Have you had any luck finding a musician?"

"Well, Luke and Lorelai want me to sing, but that still means I need someone to play instruments. And no offense sweetie, but some of the guys in your bands scare me."

"I'm sorry about that."

"Don't worry. Jess suggested someone and he's coming into town today to audition. He's coming from California!"

"California huh? Perhaps it's Greenday. They're from Oakland."

"Who?"

"Never mind. I'll go check on your food." Lane went to the kitchen to get Patty's food. When she came back, she couldn't believe who was sitting at the table with Patty.

"Lane, this is the musician I was telling you about earlier." The man stood and smiled at Lane. "Dave Rygalski."

Next time on "Meet Me at the Chuppah": What will happen between Luke and Lorelai? Will this nasty encounter stop them from making it to the chuppah? And what about the double date with Max and Rachel?

Side note: I love Dave so I brought him back.Thefamiliar face that comes to participatein the weddingwas originally supposed to be Nicole, but I have other plans for her (don't wanna get into that drama just yet).

A/N: After reading this over again, Luke comes off as a bigger jerk than I expected. But I need the angst. I hate it, but I need it. I apologize for any editing errors. I'm trying out a new beta reader and they kind fell through. In other words, they totally bailed on me.