From: Mr. Cricket

To: The heartless author that keeps killing me

CHIIIIIIIIIRP. CHIRPITY CHIRP. CHIRP CHIRPITY CHIRP CHIIIIIRP. Ok?

CHIIIRPT,

CHIRP CHIRP

Author's reply: Ummm...yeah, I didn't catch that last part. Was that a chirpity or a chirp? The world may never know...