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: Love Sex and a Bottle of Vodka :
: Chapter Twenty-one :
Time seemed to pass in a strange sort of way. It seemed to blur around the edges as the scenery does when one is riding in a fast moving vehicle. Then, at the same time, it seemed to take an inordinate amount of time to do the simplest things, such as arranging the chairs in a circle in Dumbledore's office, for the faculty meeting. No one could really tell how much time had passed when finally the last faculty member had entered the room and sat down. The air was still for a moment and then Dumbledore drew a breath.
Hermione felt discomfort, seating in the circle among her teachers, but felt Draco's hand on her own and his fingers twine through hers. She glanced over gratefully. His was looking intently on Dumbledore, who seemed to be picking through what to say. On Hermione's other side was Harry looking unnaturally pale and worried and next to him was Ginny, biting her lip and gripping the sides of her seat.
"I've called you here for a reason that concerns one of our most beloved students," Dumbledore finally said. The faculty seemed to have guessed that much as they looked at the four students. Which one?
"There is no…exact name of this ailment," he continued. "I'm afraid the best way I can put it is that Hermione Granger has been crying tears of blood." There was an audible stilt among the faculty. Madame Pomfrey drew a shuddering gasp. Professor McGonagall's lips were pressed tightly together, the edges turning white while Professor Snape sat completely unmoving like stone, except for his hands that gripped the chair so tightly that his knuckles had turned white. Still, some others looked at Dumbledore with confusion.
"I'm afraid I do not quite grasp the gravity of the situation," Professor Flitwick finally said. "My expertise lay in charms not in medical conditions."
"This ailment is the result of a splitting psyche," Dumbledore said. "And for such, there is only one cure."
"We must dissolve the errant portion of her mind," Madame Pomfrey said, in a low voice. Harry exchanged a look with Ginny. Would it be smart to bring up the other possibility? The outdated, dangerous method? If successful, it would hail superior results. Harry shook his head. It would never be considered among these practical wizards and witches. There must be a reason why Dumbledore did not bring it up; Harry hardly doubted the Dumbledore did not know of it.
"But how is this possible? This is…we've heard of this but…surely we all believed it to be myth?" Professor Trelawney said.
"Myth or not, it doesn't matter anymore," Snape snapped. "It's happening as we speak." Hermione felt her breath catch in her throat. Suddenly, seeing all of her professors worrying made her realize that her life really, truly was on the line home. Draco, as though feeling her fear, squeezed her fingers even tighter.
"Ms. Granger has informed me that she appears to have lost her memory from this summer. Unfortunately, it was not a simple memory charm that has done this to her. She has suppressed these memories for personal reasons, now unknown for even she cannot remember or be forced to remember, and it was from this suppression that the split-psyche has begun."
"How will we go about solving this?" McGonagall asked. Her voice was crisp and held a business-like authority to it. Hermione was thankful for this. Her professor's no-nonsense behavior was strangely comforting.
"It will be similar to the memory charm," Dumbledore said. "Although more complex. We are not merely erasing or going over certain parts of her mind. We will have to completely dissolve it."
"What are the side-effects to this?" Draco suddenly asked. Madame Pomfrey looked over with an apologetic expression that made Hermione's blood run cold through its corridors and chill her to the bone.
"Parts of your personality, your functioning abilities, would be lost, I'm afraid," Madame Pomfrey said. "Doing a rough diagnosis, I'm afraid…the magical part of you…It would not be gone but it would be proven faulty after the procedure is over."
"I'm afraid I don't quite understand," Hermione said, hesitantly.
"It will not be because of the dissolving that you lose your magical abilities," said Snape in a softer, gentler voice than they had ever heard before. "But because of the parts of your mind that you lose, it would essentially be dangerous for you to practice magic. Your body and mind are self-preserving. Because of this danger, it would immediately shut down the magical part of your body."
"But why?" Hermione asked. Her voice was strangely calm. "How much of myself will I lose?"
"I'm afraid it's hard to be exact before we actually go through with the dissolving process," Dumbledore said. "But you will lose a large part of your memory. The parts you have suppressed will be gone forever and it is more than possible that all things associated with the suppressed memory will also be gone. Thus if you had thought of magic or the magic world at all during the summer…you will not remember any of this. It is dangerous to practice magic without understanding it. And that is why you will lose your magical abilities." Hermione sat back, stunned. Why was this happening to her? She had such a strong desire to turn back time to stop this that she was about to start sobbing, wailing, and screaming.
"Severus, we will need a potion for you that will act as anesthesia. We need her to be asleep when we do the dissolving. I will need your help, Filius, for you said that your expertise lay in charms." Professor Dumbledore closed his eyes momentarily and when he opened them, he looked older than ever.
"I will need all of your help."
"When will this happen?" Hermione asked.
"As soon as the potion is ready. You are at an extremely volatile state right now and we do not know when your mind may split completely in two." Hermione understood that Dumbledore found her, found her and her friends, mature enough to take this with no sugar-coating.
"When can the potion be ready?" Dumbledore asked.
"Give me twenty-four hours," Snape answered.
"Well then," Dumbledore said, clasping his hands together. "We reconvene here in twenty-four hours." The faculty dispersed but not without a few reassuring nods and grips of the shoulder on Hermione.
"I hardly think you would like to spend the next twenty four hours here?" Dumbledore said, raising his eyebrows, looking over his half-moon spectacles. He produced what appeared to look a lot like a mechanical bug.
"This will buzz when you are needed. Come to my office when it does." Dumbledore finally smiled.
"Do not look so wretched, my children. All will be well in due time." He gave them a nod and excused them. Hermione felt salty wetness in the corners of her eyes that indicated that for once it was real tears. They walked out of Dumbledore's office in silence, down the stone stairs, until they were standing in the empty hallway.
What was she really going to do for the next twenty-four hours? Bid everyone she knows a farewell because she will never see them again? She won't even remember them. Hermione looked at Ginny, Harry, and Draco and felt as though she had been punched in the stomach. It seemed so strange that she would no longer see them again. She thought of Ron, Neville, Parvati and Lavender (despite their silliness), Seamus and Dean, the rest of the Weasleys, and felt even lower.
"Well, it was nice knowing you," Hermione said, attempting humor. Her smile failed miserably. Hermione was surprised to see the determined expression on Harry's face, however.
"Ginny, get Ron and meet me in the library," he said.
"What?" Hermione said, but Ginny seemed to understand. She nodded and left them, sprinting. Hermione looked over at Draco who looked equally puzzled.
"What are you doing?" she asked, as Harry gripped her wrist and they started off running towards the library.
"Not losing you."