TITLE: Shh, Baby
AUTHOR: RaeAnne
RATING: PG
SPOILERS: 1-4 to a point but mostly 3,it's my Obidala version of events so take it as you will.
DISCLAIMER: Characters are not mine, George Lucas, Lucas Arts and all that jazz own Obi-Wan and crew…sadly.
Author's Note: Hi, well this is an Obidala that I wrote a while back (before ROTS) and hadn't originally planned on posting it, but I thought I would, and see if anybody cared for it. It is told from Obi-Wan and Padme's point of view. It jumps time frames frequently though all are in sequence; the jump off point is towards the end of III, but since I wrote it before seeing Episode III it does notfollow its plot line at all. It's a bit vague, I meant that on purpose so I hope it doesn't confuse people (I always worry that I can't get across the image in my head very well…) Anyway I hope you enjoy! RaeAnne
Shh, Baby
Shh, baby, I am here tonight. I'll hold you tight, I'll let you scream away your pain, I'll let you cry a river…it's all right I won't let you go, I wont let you fall. Shh, honey, darling, love…yeah I know it's not my place to call you these things, but in the morning, we'll figure it out.
Shh, no more words, no more arguments or protests we'll walk away in the morning but for now it's just you and it's just me. Time can stop, or it can go on, I don't care because right now you are mine.
Those tears in your eyes kill me, they tear me apart, your pain, it is my pain as well, and I feel it as you do. Yeah I know, he let you down…I know he's not the man we knew anymore, yeah I know…I thought I could change him too. I thought a lot of things before, I thought the world would find peace, I thought he and I would work together leading the quest…I thought it would have been you and I instead of you and him. But yeah I know…I know we can't change the past.
I know that we can't do this, I know that we shouldn't…I know you love me, and you know what? I love you too. Yeah, I know…I know you still see his face in your sleep…that's why we won't sleep tonight. Yeah…you don't have to say it; I see it in your eyes. No, don't say it, don't tell me of tomorrow.
Shh, baby it's alright you know, it will work out in the end, just trust me. Yeah I know, your trust was misplaced before, I know you've been let down, I know you've been betrayed, but darling I'm not him. No, that's not a slap in your face, I didn't mean…I didn't mean…you know what I mean…right?
I have lost my Order; I have lost nearly every comrade, every friend, even my former Padawan, my friend, my 'adoptive' son. I have won the battle just to lose the war. I have escaped the torture just to enter hell. Yeah, I know…I know you lost so much too, I know that forever changes tomorrow. Before we fade into the past let me pretend there is a future, let me touch you, just for tonight, let me hold you.
Please don't tremble, please look me in the eyes…there it is, there is the love you confessed to me. Shh now, fall into me…
Shh, baby, I love you…yes, darling baby of mine I love you. Your father's eyes you have, that same bright blue. No don't cry, please I don't want to do this; you have to know I don't! My baby boy, my beautiful baby boy, you are the light of my life, you are the reason I didn't just give it all up when your father died, you and your sister.
You are the only link now; you and your sister are the only link that remains to speak to what was your father's true self. You are the hope you know, you can change the world, when the time comes.
Shh baby, don't cry…please don't, my heart is breaking so much I don't think I'll be able to breathe. I am dying inside, truly my innocent baby I don't want to let go.
Know your father was good, oh he was! He was such a good man, he loved, he fought for justice, he just wanted to fix it so no one he loved would ever hurt… he just wanted to change the galaxy so that we, his family, wouldn't hurt.
Shh, baby, you won't always hurt like this, you won't remember me, but know I'll always remember you, I will always ache for you, I will always hurt, I will always see your face.
I love you…I love you, I love you… I love you… I love you, shh now baby don't cry any more…
Please, don't tell me 'shh baby,' I don't want to be quiet. I love you, you saved me, you and my babies, you saved me. When I thought my world had ended, you came in and said 'shh baby', I was quiet, and I needed it then, but not now.
Now I need to scream, I need to yell… I hate him you know. Yes, I know, hate leads to the darkside, but don't tell me of it tonight, don't be a Jedi tonight. I hate him, what he has done to me, to his children. I hate him for taking my husband; I hate him for what he did to you, what he is doing to this galaxy.
No, don't tell me to shh baby! Don't try and stop my tears, my pain, I need it to keep going, if I don't have something to keep going I'll fall apart, if I don't remind myself of the evil I am trying to keep my babies from I'll break. If can't see those power hungry eyes in my mind I might burst apart.
Yes, I know, love his stronger then hate…but right now I am shaking so hard loving is the last thing on my mind.
No don't…don't kiss me like that, don't kiss me behind the ear, you know that is my weakness. Don't give that innocent grin; you know what you are doing. Do you think that kissing me is really going to silence me? Really, do you thinkthatkissingme…will…
…okay apparently, you're right.
Okay baby you win…I'll shh.
Don't, please baby don't! Don't leave me now; don't give up the fight, not like this! Fight! Do you hear me, I said fight!
No, no, it's not supposed to be like this, I am not supposed to lose you like this!
Yes, that's it one breath at a time, yeah, if you can hear me squeeze my hand…Oh honey, yes squeeze my hand! Yeah, I see it, you wear my ring, yeah I know you love me, you think I could forget something like that?
No, don't close your eyes; don't close your eyes beautiful. Please, I know you're tired, I know you've fought so bravely this far, but please just a little longer.
I know you hurt, I know you've hurt for so long, but…
No, don't be sorry, it's not your fault; it's not your fault! Don't say that! Yes, I wanted a baby, but you didn't do anything wrong…honey he was stillborn…when you get better, we'll try again.
No, I refuse; don't tell me its better this way! You can't tell me the galaxy will be better off without you; no, you can't tell me that, I won't believe it!
Oh, I see your tears; do you know what you do to me, when you cry? Don't fade… baby don't fade…
You are in such pain, I know, no don't talk anymore, shh baby, shh, don't ask me to let go, don't ask that of me…
No…not yet…please not yet….Padme! No! I said not yet! Please no…
You can't be gone! You can't be gone! No, it's not right!
I can feel you here, how can that be when you're gone? How is it I can still hear your voice? How can you tell me to 'shh baby' when you've passed away?
Shh, baby, your mother loved you, you know. I love you too, like you were my own. I've watched you grow; I can hardly believe you're almost three.
You are so much like your mother, her same big brown eyes, her same bright smile…but I see your father in you too, no honey, not me, I am not your father…I've just been your protector for a while…but I love you like I am.
Shh baby, these people are good people, I promise they'll keep you safe. No, I don't want to leave you. But your mother fought too hard, for too long and loved you too much for me to put you in danger by keeping you, and you know I want to.
Yes, your mother loved you so much, she moved heaven and earth to keep you safe, she loved you, but you know that…
Don't give up on hope, one day hope will return…one day you will know why I am doing this, one day you'll understand all of this, you'll know it all.
I have to go baby, shh now don't cry. I am weakening, your little arms wrap around me so tight, your cries overwhelm…oh I can't…My darling baby, I have to go, I have to go…shh baby…
I watch them, I watch him as he watches my baby boy grow up. You are keeping him safe, I know you are my dear Obi-Wan, you are always there keeping them, my babies, safe, thank you for that.
I am sorry I left you when I did, I am sorry for the pain you've had, I'd taken it away if I could, you know that right?
My purpose was fulfilled, it was my time, but you my darling, you still have much to do, but don't worry I'll be right here waiting. I know that you will train Luke to be a Jedi as his father was, you will show him love, love that will hopefully in the end turn Anakin back, my love couldn't do it, but maybe a son's love for his father can.
There you are, you toss and turn in your sleep, peace my darling one, let your mind settle, wrap your self in peace, in our love, its still here…
Shh, baby, sleep, we'll see each other soon…shh baby.
THE END