TITLE: For Now
RATING: PG
SUMMARY: As Shannon sleeps in his arms, Sayid reflects on the nights' events.
DISCLAIMER: I don't own the characters from Lost and am not making a profit. If they were mine, then there would be more Shayid moments.
Sayid lay as still as he could, ignoring the pins and needles in his legs caused from being still so long. He wished he could fall asleep, like the beautiful woman in his arms, but he couldn't. Ever since he had returned to the caves and Shannon had unexpectedly run into his arms, Sayid's mind had been working overtime. They had spoken briefly after Shannon forced him to tell her about his jungle adventure, but nothing of about their relationship had been discussed. The uncertainty in Shannon's eyes told Sayid she wanted to talk about it, only didn't know where to begin. He, too, was at a loss.
Finally, he couldn't take the exhaustion in her eyes any longer, and had told her to go to bed. He smiled as he thought of the way she had looked down, and started picking at her nails. She didn't want to be alone, she had told him. When he told her that he would be nearby, she still wasn't satisfied. Sayid had been surprised when she had asked him to lie down next to her. If he hadn't known the trouble she had been having sleeping since her brother's death, he might have said no. He wasn't going to lie to himself. Shannon had hurt him. He hadn't meant to, but he'd given her his heart. It would be almost impossible to get it back. Even though it was bruised, Sayid still cared for Shannon, more than he liked at times. He wondered if she realized it yet.
He had been even more surprised when she lay her head against his chest and wrapped her arms around his waist. He wondered what it meant. Did she still want to be with him? Had she forgiven him for his actions? He knew he needed to apologize to her in the morning. He should have done more for her when she found out about Locke's involvement in Boone's death.
It had been killing him to watch her from afar and see how her grief tore her apart. He hadn't been able to do anything for her. He was afraid she would push him away again if he tried, and he decided to let her come to him if she needed him. But he broke that resolve when he saw her struggling to carry her bags up the beach. At first he had thought poorly of her for bringing all those bags, but once he saw Boone's belongings, he understood. It is so hard to let go of the last tangible memories you have of a person you've lost. He knew that better than anyone.
He lifted his hand so he could gently run his fingers through Shannon's hair. He felt her body heave against his as she sighed in her sleep. He decided that he needed to stop thinking about everything, and just let it happen. Shannon was in his arms again, something he had only dreamed about.
Suddenly, he was overcome with exhaustion as the past few days' events caught up to him. Emotionally and physically, he was drained.
As he drifted off to sleep, his last thought was that at least, for now, they were together.