1Author's Note: Yeah...So SORRY this is so late...School got in the way. Studying for a five-hour exam...(shudders in fear). Anyway, I'll make the Author's note short and get on with this epilogue. Also, that means it's the last chapter of the story. So I hope you enjoy, and thanks.

Also, in addition, I'm working on a Hellsing x Sailor Moon crossover titled A Song for X X, so check that out when I publish it. And a final note, the song is by Ayumi Hamasaki, which is titled "Memorial address (take 2 version)." In addition, this chapter is done entirely in first person—Usagi is narrating.

Rainbow

By: Sailor Moonac

Epilogue: Over

I had almost forgotten how many years it has been. I was sixteen when he passed away and left a void upon my heart. Even though I was already in love with someone else, I had still fallen for him. Thinking about it now, I begin to think that the only reason for me falling in love with him was out of sympathy—sympathy of the fact that he was going to die in less than five years. When I returned to Earth from the Cauldron, I guess that was when it really sunk in that he was gone, even though he had promised me. So many wasted lives—it sometimes seems worthless. We are physical beings on a physical plane, trying to find the meaning of existence. Maybe we can still find our purpose, even after our existence is undefined. That was what I hoped for that night of our return, and I went to sleep, praying that it had only been a nightmare.

/I remember I went to sleep late that night feeling uneasy
And I had a very sad dream
The phone started to ring in the morning, breaking the silence
That nightmare I had last night had become a reality
Leaving an unfading scar on my heart
On your own, you became a star, alone.../

Even if he had returned with me to Earth, the aging process should have increased, and he would have died sooner. But if he hadn't died, then I, and the rest of the universe would be dead now. A cold emptiness that only exists in my heart. I had yearned to see his face again, even if it did bear sadness. I knew he loved me, and I'm sure he knew of the consequences. It was unrequited love, love that I felt and knew that I could never return fully. In my lifetime, we are not meant to be. I sometimes wonder was our meeting chance or destiny. But surely it was destiny? However, don't we make our own destinies? So did he change his own destiny by meeting me? I wonder about these things constantly, and even the wisdom of a queen cannot answer these questions. Maybe I'll unlock the secrets of the universe someday, then we could possibly meet again. Just one last time, if only...

/Sayonara—you have gone to that place where we can never meet again
I can't accept the coldness of the eternal parting
I wish I could have heard from you
That I had certainly been loved by you
Only once, even if it had been a lie/

I became queen six years later and had my own heir to the throne. I was happy, content with the serenity, yet I still felt that void. Crystal Tokyo is supposed to be a paradise, but does paradise truly exist? Paradise is a place where a person is the happiest, so if I am not completely happy, does that mean that I have not found paradise yet? But what person can be truly happy? Loneliness and neglect are common feelings of a being, that is what makes us truly living creatures. That must mean that there is no such thing as paradise. No true happiness for me. But I am really being selfish aren't I? To care about my own happiness instead of others' is really cruel. But humans are such selfish creatures. We should be happy caring for others.

/The sorrow I had thought to be endless came to an end
The season has changed, I feel bitterly cold
I will never forget that first day of summer
The sky kept on crying instead of me this year
I feel as if I were living in the continuation of a nightmare
And I have no more tears to shed/

Because we are selfish, we often overlook things and do not realize the pain of another. What I regret most was never being able to return those words of love to him. I never even had a chance to say goodbye...Even though I was reunited with my friends and family...all along, I knew who I was missing.

/Sayonara—even my last words didn't reach you
I was forced to realize the coldness of our parting
I wish I could have heard from you
That you never regretted those days that we spent together
Only once, even if it had been a lie/

Flashes of our short time together became a common theme in my dreams—no, nightmares. But in all honesty, I would rather live in that nightmare, as long as you are there. Sometimes, I believe reality is the nightmare and my dreams are reality. How much do I perplex myself. My family and friends worry about me sometimes. They can see the sadness in my eyes on my birthday. But it isn't just mine's and my daughter's birthday, but his's as well. I sometimes accuse him of being selfish, by only caring about his own feelings instead of mines. But upon that thought, I realize how vile I am compared to his purity in light. A young child that was forced to grow up too soon...I really wanted to protect him with all of my heart.

/Why did you do it this way?
Leaving memories only to the very end/

Even with the great power of the Ginzuishou, it really is pointless to try to resurrect a person isn't it? A life for a life—all I have left are memories. As these years have gone by, I had really hoped that you would fulfil your promise. I can remember clearly, your voice, your eyes, your smile. Didn't you promise me? Didn't you?

"I'll see you again someday Usagi. I promised you that. I'll wait for you, even if I have to wait to the end of time."

Please don't go and break that promise. I would like to one day take you to that bright star just a little beyond the Cauldron. It would be nice if we could meet there.

/Sayonara—you have gone to that place where we can never meet again
I can't accept the coldness of the eternal parting
I wish I could have heard from you
That I had certainly been loved by you
Only once, even if it had been a lie/

Even though my future as Neo-Queen Serenity is set in stone, I still have hope. After meeting Sailor Cosmos—my future self, I realize that I am meant to live, even when my reign as Queen is over. I am the only person that actually met Sailor Cosmos in the present, therefore I have a clue as to what my future holds. I have no doubt, I will die as Neo-Queen Serenity, and Small Lady shall ascend the throne. So maybe I won't meat him again in this lifetime, but what about my next as Sailor Cosmos? I shall watch the universe change and balance itself, and then over power itself over and over again. In that eternity, will I really meet him again? I hope so—no I know so.

/Please tell me this is only the story of a continuing nightmare
And that I have not yet awaken/

I feel as though this is the nightmare that I'm living in, instead of the reality. Maybe with the death of Neo-Queen Serenity, I shall wake up to reality once again. But no matter what, I shall always love my past, my family, and my friends. Now I head towards the future, knowing that I will die soon. It isn't long now till I awake once again. I hope my voice can reach you this time...

I walked out to the balcony just outside the main hall of the palace. The crystal that decorated the city sparked gently in the afternoon sun. The moon was bright and close to Earth, making it visible, even during the day. A soft wind started blowing, and birds flew by. A perfect scene of an ideal paradise. But this peace will not last.

It has been over a thousand years since Ran died, and I know that the invasion of Earth will happen soon. I can see the rising darkness in people's hearts and in space. Helios has been betrothed to Small Lady, and Small Lady...I felt my lips quirk into a small smirk. She isn't very small anymore. She is about my height now in fact. I—

"Dear, what are you doing out here?"

I turned around and saw King Endymion coming towards me. I smiled gently as his still handsome countenance as he wrapped his arms around me.

"Nothing, I'm just wondering what will happen to us when our Small Lady becomes queen."

"Well, we probably will just live on our own, maybe somewhere in the mountains, away from the city. It won't be our responsibility to stay here anymore."

"True, but I still worry about here."

"I'm sure she'll be an amazing queen. She has been watching you for nearly a thousand years."

I smiled at that thought and turned to face the city again. When I was certain that my Endymion wasn't looking, I frowned and allowed my sadness to take my features. I know Small Lady will never be queen while Neo-Queen Serenity is still alive. Therefore, I must die. I will be reborn as Cosmos then, reborn and then forgotten.

"Usako?"

I turned and smiled at him. He hasn't let go of that little nickname, even now. Of course, I still call him "Mamoru," even after all of this time.

"Yes?"

"Is something wrong?"

"No, not at all."

Endymion was quiet for a few moments before speaking again. "Are you thinking about Ran?"

I blinked and pretended to be slightly surprised. I felt as though it was taboo to talk about Ran. I barely mentioned him in these thousand years, in fear that it would arouse my feelings for him again. But I had never truly lost those feelings, just buried it.

"No, why do you ask?"

He didn't answer, just making an excuse that he needed to attend to something. I watched him leave me and I realized that he has always known about my feelings for Ran. He just never brought it up for my sake. I loved him even more at that moment, and I really will not—could not—bare to leave him nor anyone else.

I returned my gaze to the city briefly before heading to my—our—room. On a little podium, the Ginzuishou floated atop a white cushion. I reached my hand out and touched it gently, before it disappeared. By now, Small Lady's own Sailor Crystal is strong enough to be the new Ginzuishou. As time goes on, her powers will grow, just as mine had. I walked over to the night stand and looked at an antique lamp that needed to be lit with a candle. It was the lamp I gave Ran as his first birthday with me. I still use it, pointless really; it's just for sentiments.

I headed towards the throne room and called for a meeting of the Sailor Soldiers. I even took the liberty of summoning Sailor Galaxia from deep space. As I sat down on the throne with my husband at my side, and my daughter and her future husband at my other side, I looked to the gathered Soldiers.

They were slightly confused as to why I summoned them. Once they were all quiet, I said my final words. I rose from my throne and spoke. "Everyone, for over a thousand years we had peace. But I'm afraid, that we must take up arms again and fight once again..."

I allowed for a moment of confusion before continuing. "And I must bid farewell to you all." Before I allowed everyone to question me, I turned and spoke directly to my Small Lady.

"Small Lady, it is time that you take up the royal throne with the Sailor Quartets as your faithful guardians." I turned back to everyone. "Goodbye, I will never forget any of you and I will always watch over you all."

My nightmare became a reality at that moment and I closed my eyes as the darkness descended upon the Earth and castle. When I was gazing at Ran's lamp, I had then realized that it was today—now. The destruction of me. I am ready and willing to die.

Chaos, I will not run away this time, but face you with courage, just as Ran had...

I had lost count of how many years I had battled Chaos after the destruction of Crystal Tokyo. But I do remember that Crystal Tokyo rebuilt itself with my former daughter as the new queen. I now stand at the foot of the Cauldron, staring into the void where light and darkness mix to be completely neutral.

As I stood there, I wondered what would happen if I jumped in. Would I be reborn as someone entirely different? Or would I still be reborn as Usagi? But I'm guessing I'll be reborn as Usagi still...I wonder who Ran was reborn as.

"I wonder can I control the Cauldron?" I mean, that really was a stupid question. Right? Can I actually control the Cauldron? "Of course not."

But can the Cauldron support me in every way possible? Yes, that I'm sure. It seems that everything in the Universe would bend and please me now. Is it because I'm the Queen of the Universe. I'm Sailor Cosmos—but I'm still Usagi. No matter what, a person can never lose the past.

I stepped closer to the Cauldron and looked in. I raised my wings and flew above it, levitating just above the surface. I slowly lowered myself in—now why did I go and do that? Well, I doubt I would be reborn anyway—wait! The Cauldron, something is happening.

The Cauldron swirled with all the colors of the rainbow, and a small hum was heard. I just suddenly remembered. The song that was playing that night when I first met Ran was called RAINBOW. The hum was persistent and growing louder as the colors started spinning faster. A rather ridiculous idea came into my mind.

"Can you show me—can you show me who Ran was reincarnated into?"

The spinning increased even further and the hum was slowly dying down. The rainbow colors joined into a white light and I closed my eyes briefly.

After a few moments, I reopened my eyes and looked around my surroundings. I felt a familiar tug at my heart when I saw the green grass of Elysium, surrounded by roses, and white marble. I smiled gently as I saw Helios—but instantly it turned into a frown when he ran right into me—well, more like right through me. I looked at my hands and saw that it was slightly transparent. So, I'm like a ghost? I guess I should be like a ghost—the spirit of the past, present, and future.

Helios stopped momentarily and looked behind, directly at me. That is, if he could see me. He obviously couldn't from his frown, but he smiled slightly before continuing on. This time, at a slower pace. I opened my wings again and flew after him. I felt almost like a poltergeist that stalks its prey. I heard a giggle come out of my mouth. Helios stopped again and looked around. I wondered if he could actually hear me.

"Helios, is there something wrong?"

I felt my heart skip a few beats and I turned around to watch my beloved Endymion walk through my dangling legs because I'm floating in the air and head towards Helios.

"No my prince, but I keep on sensing something..."

"Sensing something? Like what?"

"I'm not sure, just a warm presence of assurance."

"Ah...that's interesting."

"Yes, I sensed it momentarily over there." Helios pointed at where I was floating and I saw Endymion glance at my location briefly before turning his gaze back to Helios.

"Well, Helios, there isn't anything there. So, just going on ahead, I'll catch up to you."

"Yes my prince." Helios bowed slightly before turning around to head to his original goal.

"Actually, Helios?"

Helios paused and turned around to face Endymion. "Yes?"

"Was the presence familiar?"

"Yes. Very much so, although I can't figure out where."

Endymion nodded and dismissed Helios. He turned and looked around, and paused to pick up a rose that was on the ground. He then turned to look out the palace of Elysion. "Ahh...a rainbow."

I floated down from the ceiling to get a better view, and sure enough, there was a rainbow outside. I was startled when Endymion started mumbling a song. I strained to hear what he was singing...

"...Now I'll only sing for your sake...you are my special treasure...no rain, can't get the rainbow...no rain can't get the rainbow..."

I felt my eyes widened. "RAINBOW..."

Endymion whipped his head around and look directly into my eyes—that is if he could actually see me. An odd thought struck me then. When I met Ran, I noticed Mamoru was barely around. Mamoru was around a few times, but then he went off the college in America. He only came back when Ran left...

Unconsciously, I felt myself gasp. The only reason that thought struck me was because...I was staring into Ran's eyes. Those gray-sky blue eyes with a tint of innocence. Wait...why didn't I notice it before...

Endymion shrugged and turned around to follow Helios—the colors started to swirl into a rainbow until I found myself floating outside the Cauldron once again. I blinked in surprise and decided to head back to my home—the star that Ran and I saw all those years ago above the Cauldron.

I felt feathers swirl around me, blocking my view momentarily before departing. Leaving me in a throne room of white and crystal. I sighed and sat down on my throne and looked into the liquid void in the center of the room. That void allows me to look throughout the universe without having to leave the star.

I blinked...wait. I asked the Cauldron to show me who Ran was re-incarnated into—

"Ran was sent back in time and re-incarnated as Mamoru—! But that makes perfect sense, those time when they were not together with me..." I leaned back on my throne and smiled.

"I guess I should take that trip into the Cauldron...maybe just for a second chance..." I closed my eyes and smiled.

Done and Completed! That was my shortest chapter yet aside from the intro huh? That was an odd ending wasn't it? I wanted a cliche ending where Ran turns out to being Mamoru. I mean, they do look alike. Anyway, thanks for reading and I hoped you enjoyed it. Now check out my next story A Song for X X!

Thanks and please review!

Sailor Moonac