All right, I'm sorry this is so late. But it's good! I promise! The style may be a bit different—I change fast. And I'll try to update sooner, even though the thing is drawing to a close as it is...XD
Disclaimer: I own that leaf on the ground. And that one. And that one.
Moribund-
When the Light Goes Out
A light glimmered from somewhere above me—faint, but there, piercing through the darkness. I reached for it even as it drew away from me, tinkling laughter flooding my ears. The laughter deepened into a mature chuckle, mixed in with the sound of the waves against the beach. Stop running, I thought faintly, even though the words didn't make sense to me. Why are you running from me? Always running...
"C'mon, Sora," that voice rang out in my ears. "Too slow, are you? Or are you scared?"
No, I'm not. I struggled forward, my hand reaching out for his.
"You're so dangerous," another voice shouted from behind me. "You're going to get him hurt. Come with me, Sora. You remember me, right?"
Kairi, I thought thickly. She was my friend, the reason why I'd started out on this journey. Wasn't she? I started toward her clumsily—for some reason my feet were numb and couldn't seem to walk.
"No, Sora. Over here," Riku called. "She can't do anything. I'll protect you, Sora. You don't have to be afraid."
"Liar. You work with the darkness now, Riku. All you can do is hurt him more," Kairi retorted in a scathing tone. "If he goes with you, he goes into darkness again. If he comes with me, he won't have to. He won't have to feel anything like that—I'll take care of him."
I sank to the ground as their voices rose angrily, blending in a hail of insults and pointed arguments. It was then that their opposing voices became one that was strikingly close to mine. "Come with me," it said quietly as the blond boy held out his hand invitingly. "We'll become one again. One, and joined with the Heartless."
No. Get away.
"Over here, Sora..."
Stay away from me!
"Sora?"
"Stay away!" I shouted, throwing my hands out in front of me. They struck something solid which felt suspiciously like Riku's chest. My eyes blinked open and, once the world came into focus, I could realize that this was the case. Blushing furiously, I withdrew my hands and became suddenly aware of the biting pain in my side. From the look of it, I was lying in the medical ward at Disney Castle.
Riku tenderly brushed a strand of hair away from my face, making me shiver at his touch. "You're alive," he said quietly. "I was so afraid I'd never get to talk to you again."
I frowned, trying to remember. "What happened? We were at the End of the World...the Secret Place..."
He nodded. "Axel was at Hollow Bastion when we were. Remember? He was the one who opened the doors and saved our lives. He was afraid of you, so he waited until you were gone before coming after me." A small smile, a shadow of his usual smirk, flickered across Riku's face. "Just think. Cute little vulnerable Sora, all grown up and saving me from certain death."
It took some self-control to keep from biting off his fingers. The last person who called me cute was Wakka, and he hadn't been right in the head since.
Notwithstanding the fact that he had never really been right in the head.
"Who's heart was that?" I asked. "The one you threw into the door?"
Riku shook his head. "No one's. It was an illusion. I just led Axel to believe it was someone he cared about, but I don't know who it would have been." He smiled wryly. "I had to do something fast."
I nodded slowly, still trying to recall the rest of the events there. "The wind stopped when you were in front of the door...but...you fell through! How did you—?"
"Pixie dust," Riku replied simply. "The wind was caused by Axel's will, so it stopped when mine clashed against his. It's very easy to manipulate the End of the World if you know how." He gave me a speculative look. "The pixie dust—it fell from nowhere—that was you, wasn't it?"
I smiled in response, noting in the process that I felt strangely weak. I really didn't feel like talking, but there were still a lot of things I needed to know.
"Donald and Goofy picked us up," he explained at my question. "They weren't too far away at the time. There was so much blood, though, and for a while everyone thought you were going to die. You've been asleep for three days now." Riku breathed a ragged sigh. "If you die...I don't know..." He shook his head. "I just wish I'd told you sooner. Maybe things wouldn't have turned out like this."
"Not your fault," I managed softly, placing a hand on his cheek. "I love you, Riku."
He smiled faintly, his hand covering mine. "I love you, too."
l...
The rest of the day was spent greeting my anxious comrades-in-arms. Riku stayed superglued to my side as I talked with Leon, Yuffie, and Aerith and tried to talk with Cloud, although he was being characteristically distant. He flatly turned down my offer to spar with him once I recovered, and the mention of that seemed to make the rest of them somber. Cid stopped in briefly for what he said was a routine check on customer satisfaction, but it seemed like that subject never came up.
It was after Donald and Goofy left that I noticed Riku was being unusually quiet and looking disappointed. His eyes came back into focus when I asked what was wrong, and he placed a hand over his face, shaking his head with a groan. "I'm such an idiot. I don't know why I believed Maleficent when she told me you replaced me with them."
I considered that. "Cid told me that Maleficent was a witch," I reminded him. "Witches cast spells, Riku. She probably just made you see things her way."
A fiery hatred ignited in his aquamarine eyes. "I wish she were here right now," he muttered in a dark tone. "There are so many things left to thank her for. In blood."
Grinning, I leaned forward and locked my arms around his neck, ignoring the spasm of pain that passed through my side. "I love my Riku when he's violent!"
"Sora...can't breathe..."
I relaxed my hold and leaned back, suddenly feeling something amiss. "Is Kairi still at the island? I figured she'd stop by. I mean, only since I almost died," I added playfully.
Riku, though, looked solemn suddenly. "Sora, about Kairi..." he murmured.
My face fell. "What? Is she hurt?"
He shook his head. "The blond boy from the Lighthouse came by Traverse Town while we were fighting Axel. He was looking for you and he asked her, but she couldn't tell him where you were, so..."
"He killed her," I finished in a flat tone.
Riku nodded apologetically. "We...Kairi and I were never very close, but I know it's really hard on you."
I nodded mutely, staring at the uninteresting blanket in front of me. "I have to...find him...got to kill him..." I muttered, savagely tearing at the blanket.
"Don't overexert yourself," Riku told me, placing a hand over mine. "It...it's not good for you." He couldn't meet my eyes.
I wondered why he was saying that—it wasn't like I was going to break into pieces—but my grief was too great to be ignored at this point. My vision fogged over with tears, and I quickly blinked them back to hide them from Riku.
"Sora," he said quietly, sitting next to me on the bed. I looked up into those deep eyes, feeling a lump rise in my throat. "Strong men cry."
A wail of unspeakable loss found its way to my throat, and I buried my face in his shoulder, sobbing uncontrollably.
l...
The half-moon was visible through the third-story window as I lay there, watching the stars appear one by one. To think that every star was a world, each giving off its own light—it would take a lifetime to see them all. Maybe if Riku came with me, I decided, we would see them together. I turned to look at him in the silvery moonlight. We still had a long time together, didn't we?
"Riku," I whispered, unable to tell if he was still awake. He was still seated on the stool beside me, only now his head was pillowed on his arms on the blanket. I smiled silently, seeing the rhythmic rise and fall of his back. "Rikurikuriku," I cooed softly, stroking his delightfully soft hair. "My Riku."
I found myself remembering days from not so long ago, even before Kairi came. I was always jealous of Riku's name because I loved it so much. It was the awesomest name, I remembered thinking. But his name had become mine, in a different sense. It was mine to shout when I wanted to tell him something, mine to whisper when the light went out and I was scared, and mine to caress when I told him I loved him.
"I love you so much right now," I said softly, letting one silvery strand fall back against his cheek.
The door clicked shut, and I looked up to see Cloud standing next to it. He'd entered too quietly to be heard, so the sight was a bit startling, but not to the point of screaming and jumping away. "Sora?" he called in a low voice, stepping closer. "I figured you'd be awake."
It happened that I chose that moment to realize he'd seen me doting over Riku, and a blush broke out on my features, mercifully hidden by the darkness. "Uh, yeah," I managed in the same soft tone. "But I don't want to wake Riku right now."
Cloud nodded. "I just felt it would be in order to say goodbye."
That one caught me off guard. "You're going away?"
"I told you. I'm looking for someone."
I frowned. "But I thought...Aerith?"
A faint glimmer of mirth appeared in his eye. "Not quite, Sora. You may have set out to find Kairi, but she wasn't the one you were looking for."
Understanding dawned like the sun after a rainy day. "All right then," I replied. "Goodbye, and good luck."
He nodded to me in farewell. "As to you, Sora." He started for the door, but paused. "I probably shouldn't tell you this. Riku doesn't want you to know—he's afraid it'll scare you or upset you—but I think it'll be better, in the long run, if you know."
I blinked, trying to imagine what kind of news this could be. "Go on."
The blonde fingered the doorknob in what seemed to be uncertainty, although that had to be an impossibility. "It's a very delicate subject, but there's no easy preamble to it, so you'll have to forgive me if it sounds abrupt. From what the doctors say, Sora, you don't have much time left at all."
The words caught me like a blow to the stomach. My hands began to shake so I clasped them together in my lap, feeling a strange numbness creeping up to my mind. "How long?" I asked.
"Until next week, if you're lucky." There was a pause. "I'm sorry, Sora. I wish there were something I could do."
"It's not your fault," I whispered, bowing my head slowly as though it carried a great weight.
The door clicked shut.
l...
Two days passed, during which Riku conferred several times with assorted members of the Disney Castle faculty. For a while he seemed very angry about something, but it was that day that he came in wearing a smile. "It took a lot to get this, but it was worth it," he announced. "I don't ever want us separated again."
I raised an eyebrow. "A leash?"
"Of course not," he told me. Then his eyes narrowed. "But I could get one if you want."
"That depends. Am I seme?"
"No."
I pouted, crossing my arms over my chest. "You're the one with the long hair."
Riku chose to ignore that. "Here," he said flatly, holding out one half of a very familiar fruit. "Stuff your face."
Smiling and inhaling the sweet smell of the fruit, I proceeded to do so. Riku sat down, smirking, and I realized something. My eyes narrowed suspiciously. "Where's the other half?"
"I force-fed it to Donald."
I screamed in agony.
Riku waved his hands for silence. "You know I'm kidding," he told me. "If you must know, I didn't have breakfast this morning, so I was hungry. Plus, it took the shipping agency forever to get it here. I was afraid it wouldn't get here before—" He stopped short, then smiled endearingly. "Before you got hungry," he said quickly.
It became apparent to me how he was planning to thwart death. I finished the rest of the paopu fruit, if only to humor him, and then sighed. "Riku, pears don't cure cancer and apples don't heal wounds. I'm not saying it's impossible, I just…I don't want you to get your hopes up too high. I don't want you to hurt any more than you have to."
He stared at me. "Then...they told you? But I told them not to—!"
"It wasn't them," I told him. "I'm the one who asked. I needed to know."
For a moment he stood there, looking as though he were about to get angry the way he would back on the island. But he just sank into the chair nearby, looking strangely lifeless. "So...you don't think it'll work," he said in an emotionless voice, placing a hand over his eyes exhaustedly. "I didn't really think so either, before I ordered it. I guess I'm just trying to hold water in my hands, Sora. I'm trying to keep you with me for as long as I can."
For a little while, neither of us said anything. Then his shoulders jerked suddenly, his lips quirking upward. A broken chuckle escaped him—a terrible, self-mocking laughter. "It's kind of funny, actually. Here I am, a teenager. According to me, I'm invincible. Nothing terrible could happen to me or anyone else. I can't do anything that will make someone I care about die."
I stared at him as he moved his hand, seeing the dead look in his eyes. "Riku..." I managed softly.
"Kairi didn't do anything," he continued, the laughter subsiding somewhat. "A complete innocent. But she still died. And you...you did everything you could just to save everyone. And here you are." He brushed aside a tear that had slipped out of the corner of his eye. "Me—I ran around hurting everyone. I'm responsible for a lot of what went wrong. I'm the one who should be dying now, Sora, not you."
There was a silence, during which I leaned back against the pillows propping me up and bit my lip to stop the tears. "Riku," I said finally. "Come here."
He dutifully rose and came to my side. "Listen to me," I said firmly, taking his face between my hands. "I love you, Riku. I love you more than anyone or anything in this world and the next. You made one mistake, one slip somewhere along the line, and the others used you to do everything else. It could just as easily have been me, Riku. None of this is your fault."
"But—!"
"I'm not finished. It's not your fault because you didn't mean to do anything, and you're upset right now. They wouldn't feel this way—they meant to do everything they did. It's their fault, Riku, not yours!"
His eyes closed for a moment, and when they opened, they were misty with tears. "Thank you, Sora."
l...
We parted for a day, then. I guess Riku just had a few things he hadn't dealt with yet. I spent the day chewing on the candy sent over from Aerith, hoping the sugar would dispell the sudden increase in weakness that had settled over me. It didn't, though—it only got me in trouble with the head nurse. So I was in no mood when Riku walked in with a leash.
"Come here, Riku," I told him in a neutral tone.
His eyebrows raised innocently, he sidled up next to me and waited.
I poked his manly scar.
This action was rewarded with an only slightly exaggerated display of pain, after which I reverted to staring listlessly out the window. There was something I wanted to ask him, but I was afraid of how he might react. "Riku," I said finally, absently trailing my fingers along the blanket.
"Mm?"
"Would you...kiss me?"
There was no answer, and Riku turned his face away, a slight blush tinging his features. "I'm sorry...I guess I...just wanted things to be different...y'know?" I managed weakly, struggling to sound normal.
"I know. I wish I could change them for you," Riku said quietly, drawing nearer. He leaned down, at first awkwardly, and his lips closed smoothly over mine. It was a struggle to lift my hand and slide my fingers through the silvery strands, to breathe and move in unison with him the way I'd wanted to so many times before. And yet, at the same time, something strange was going through my mind.
"You can't protect him," Kairi said again. "You can only hurt him."
"Give me a chance!" Riku yelled. "If you take him, he'll be miserable!"
The world shifted. "Riku," I murmured softly.
"What is it?" His eyes were worried as he looked at me. "Is something wrong?"
I tried to reply, but too soon he was gone, replaced by the arguing memories. Against my will, my numb feet began to step toward Kairi. "That's right, Sora," she said, her arms opening invitingly. "Come with me, and you don't have to feel so much pain anymore. Nothing bad can happen to you now."
"Sora!" Riku seemed to be shouting in unison with himself. "Sora, don't go with her!"
"Sora, what's wrong?"
My eyes opened one last time, dazedly picking up Riku's concerned, aquamarine orbs. "...Lighthouse..."
The darkness took me, and I didn't feel.
l...
Dai: THE END! Muahahahaha!
Riku: (shuddering with fury) Dathari...
Dai: Er, that is, unless you decide to review. For every review, Sora's chance of survival increases one millionth!
Riku: Somebody better review, or I'll do some very painful convincing.
Sora: Please! My life is hanging in the balance!
Dai: Be quiet, you twit! Back to your cage!
Sora: (sighs)
Reviews:
Reina-183: Ah? Sora. Don't kill him eiter. They need a nice happy ending...or something like that. Love your story, but your cliffhangers are killing me!
Dai: Yes. My cliffhangers are like that. On the subject of Sora, hmmm...
Riku: (looms menacingly) He'd better not stay dead.
Dai: (sweatdrop) Rest assured, he's in good hands. (pokes manly scar)
Ranma Higurashi: Kyah! EBIL CLIFFHANGER! UPDATE SOON!
Dai: That seems to be a recurring theme around here, isn't it? Perhaps I should let up. (exchanges glances with Kairi) Nah. XD
Anyway, I hope everyone liked this installment, and I'll update once I finish my ARGH schoolwork. If I can just clean up the ARGH, then the ARGH shouldn't be so ARGH.