The Earth Temple Part 2

Link and Medli reluctantly handed their clothes to the moblins.

"I'm NOT gonna look at you..." Link muttered to Medli, looking away.

"Thank you for your clothing. You shall have it returned to you within 72 hours," the second moblin said.

"WHAT!" Link yelled. "YOU SAID WE'D GET OUR CLOTHES BACK WHEN WE FINISHED OUR BUSINESS IN THIS JOINT! IT'S NOT GONNA TAKE 72 HOURS!"

"We know," the first moblin said. "But we like to see you so miserable. Besides, there are some people who are naked EVERY DAY! You'll live."

"YOU SON OF A BITCH, HOW WOULD YOU LIKE IT IF YOU WERE NAKED FOR 72 HOURS!"

"Well, I-"

The first moblin was cut off when Link set it on fire. Then he set the second one on fire too.

"Link, are you a pyro?" Medli asked.

Link sighed, and threw his lighter across the room out of frustration.

"No...I just felt like doing that."

"That still doesen't mean you're not a pyro..."

"JUST SHUT THE FUCK UP MEDLI, OK? I DON'T NEED TO TAKE YOUR BULLSHIT RIGHT NOW! I'M HAVING A CRISIS HERE!"

"Why does being naked bother you so much?" Medli asked.

"BECAUSE! I'M NAKED WITH YOU!" Link shouted, and, without realizing it, he looked at Medli.

The boy began rolling around on the ground, naked, and screaming.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH! IT BUUUUUUUURNS!"

"Wait! Link! The moblins are gone! Let's get our clothes back!"

But, alas, when Medli turned to face their clothing, she was just in time to watch it being pulled through the ground by some poes.

"Dammit," she muttered.

Link had watched too, and was now whimpering.

"My clothes..."

His bottom lip quivered.

"I must not cry...I must not cry...I must no-WWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!" he screamed as he began wailing.

Medli knelt beside Link.

"Link! Calm down! You're crying because you're naked, for Pete's sake!" she said.

Medli put a hand on Link's shoulder.

The boy stiffened.

"Ok...when we are BOTH naked, don't touch me...when YOU'RE naked, stay away from me...when I'M naked, you should be jealous..." he growled.

"HA! Jealous? Of YOUR cock and balls? HA! They're not THAT great..." Medli snorted. "Now, enough chitchat. Dry your eyes so we can get going!"

Link stood up.

"Let's go..." he muttered.

Link walked into the door. He would've gone through it, if it weren't barred up.

"AW! SON OF A BITCH!" Link yelled, bringing his hands up to his bleeding nose.

Medli rolled her eyes.

"There's a better way to do it..."

The rito girl pulled out a bomb, lit the fuse, grabbed Link, and ran away. The bomb blasted the door down!

"Woah..." Link muttered.

Then the two kids walked through the destroyed door.

The moment they set bare foot into the next room, a familiar chattering filled their ears.

Link gulped.

Then, ChuChus began to appear!

They slunk out from the shadows of the dark Earth Temple, preparing to attack...

"THEY'RE NAKED! AH HA HA! THEY'RE LIKE, SO, TOTALLY NAKED! LOOK GUYS! NAKED CHILDREN!" one ChuChu shouted.

Then, all the ChuChus stopped their attack and began laughing.

Link turned bright red.

"I DON'T SEE YOU WEARING CLOTHES!" he shouted.

"We don't need to wear clothes!" a red ChuChu said. "We have no vaginas, penises, asses, breasts, or balls. But YOU do! HA HA HA HA HA!"

"Link, where's your lighter?" Medli asked through clenched teeth.

"Right here," Link said, pulling the lighter from seemingly out of nowhere and handing it to her.

He was being careful not to look at Medli.

The Rito girl set the ChuChus on fire, then bombed the room so they could enter the next one.

"You sure like explosives, don't you?" Link asked.

"Yep."

They entered what appeared to be the main room of the temple.

There were four doorways, two on each side of the room, and, up ahead sat a large stone statue face. It had two eyes on its face that looked like moons. But, in front of the face sat lots of blue smoke...

"Ok, seeing as I am the leader and boss of this operation, I say we go into the smoke!" Link declared.

"I don't think that's a good idea..." Medli said.

"Nonsense!" Link replied. "I is waaaaaaay much more smarter than you!"

The boy walked into the blue smoke.

"Woah...spinny..."

"Link?" Medli called.

She walked over to the smoke, and Link stumbled out.

"Woooooaaaaaaah...everything's purple..." he said.

"Link?" Medli asked, kneeling down next to him.

After a moment, the boy shook his head, and appeared to be back to normal.

"Woah! That stuff is AWESOME! It gives you a nice buzz!"

Link grabbed a bottle from out of nowhere, and went over to the smoke. He began to catch some of the gas in the container, until Medli slapped him.

"LINK! No time for drugs! We have business to finish!"

Link glared at Medli.

"Fun sucke-AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!"

Without realizing it, our hero had looked at Medli, and, once again, began rolling around and screaming...naked.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH! MY EYES! MY EEEEEYYYYYYEEEEESSSSS!"

Medli stood up and watched him, slightly amused. Link was more of a source of entertainment than a hero.

Finally, sweating and shaking, Link sat up, more careful than ever to not look at his rito companion.

"Are you finished overreacting now?" Medli asked.

"Yes, I'm finished overe-HEY! I was NOT overreacting! If anything, I could've died, and I STILL wouldn't be overreacting!"

Medli rolled her eyes.

"Whatever, I don't care. Let's go.

Link stood up, and looked around.

"Go where? There are too many doors here!"

"There's only four..."

"FOUR IS A VERY HIGH NUMBER, FOR YOUR INFORMATION!"

"Just shut up and let me think! Ok...hmm..."

There was a moment of silence.

"I GOT IT! Let's blow up everything in our path until we get to the boss' lair!" Medli exclaimed.

Link gave her a funny look.

"And I thought I had problems... But, it sounds like a plan to me! Let's just-AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH, SHIT!"

Once again, Link looked at Medli, and started having some kind of seizure.

Medli grinned.

"Heh heh, stupid..."

After a few minutes of screaming, shaking, and throwing up, Link was nearly back to normal...well, maybe not, but, he was ok enough.

Medli pulled some more bombs out of nowhere, lit the fuses, and placed them in various spots throughout the room. Then she grabbed Link by the arm, and dashed into another room with him.

Loud banging, crashing, and exploding noises filled thier ears, and a few walls collapsed. The temple began shaking!

Link screamed, shut his eyes, and, without realizing it, held on to Medli for dear life.

The Rito girl started to scream at the fact that he was holding her while they were both in the nude, and, unfortunately, both their cries were drowned out by the sound of the temple being destroyed.

After a few minutes that seemed like forever, all was quiet. Link let go of Medli and opened his eyes. Medli looked around.

"HEY! I DID IT! I BLEW UP AN ENTIRE BUILDING! WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" she cheered.

Link raised his eyebrows, but didn't look at Medli.

"And you're proud of the fact that you nearly killed us BOTH? Killed us DEAD?" Link replied.

"Yes, actually, I am."

"BWUA HA HA HA HA HA HA!"

Laughter sounded.

Link and Medli turned to see the King of Red Lions staring at them. After all, most of the temple was gone, and there was a nice view of the ocean now!

"You're both naked! Naked children! AH HA HA HA HA!" The King howled.

"Oh, HA HA, laugh it up, it's sooooo funny! Oooh! Oooh! Naked children! It's so hilarious, I think I might DIE!" Link shot back sarcastically. "Now, shut the fuck up! I have some business to take care of..."

Link picked through the rubble of the destroyed temple, picking up the mysteriously unharmed mirror shield and the boss key, then turned to face the last room standing. It was the boss room...

"Ok, Medli, shut up, and let's go."

"I wasn't saying anything though!"

"JUST SHUT UP ANYWAY!"

And, with that, Link and Medli unlocked the door to the boss' room...