Author's Note: Again, this is a reposting, mostly so I could edit the grammatical and continuity problems. For one, I realized after re-watching the show last week that Misato sleeps on a pallet, not a bed. So I fixed that. Anyway, enjoy.

And again… No, I don't own Neon Genesis Evangelion. Unfortunately. I wish I could claim the pure insanity and beauty that is NGE. But sadly, I cannot.

The Way It Should Have Been

Chapter Two: This Is Insane

The morning couldn't come quickly enough for Misato. After her dream, she had been unable to lay down again and close her eyes. The one time she tried, she found the slender, matured, handsome face of the nineteen-year-old Shinji smiling at her from behind her eyelids. Immediately, her eyes flew open and she once again leapt from the pallet. That was when she retreated into the kitchen and grabbed a can of beer from the refrigerator that Pen Pen did not inhabit. She straddled the nearest chair, which was facing outward from the kitchen table, and draped her arms over the back of it as she carelessly opened the can and let it foam and spill over her fingers.

"To my screwed up life and my even more screwed up dreams," Misato murmured to herself, and then she lifted the beer to her lips and chugged it in her usual fashion. In a flash, the beer can was empty. She slammed it onto the table with more force than she had really intended, and froze, afraid she might have jolted either Shinji or Asuka from their sleep. But when, after several minutes, they did not emerge from their bedrooms, she sighed in relief and retrieved another beer from the fridge. She shook her head at herself as she piled several cold Kirins and Sapporos in her arms and dumped them on the table and she closed the fridge with her foot. Beer was her refuge, her first answer to everything confusing or difficult that appeared in her life. She knew and she hated it, but she never fought it. She simply didn't have the energy to try anymore, and she had long since given up caring. Still, she knew how pathetic it was that there was almost nothing but beer in the refrigerator. Yeah, it was really very sad.

Knowing that did not, however, stop her from popping another can open and downing it in fifteen seconds. With a satisfied sigh, she dropped her head onto the back of the chair, her arms over it in front of her. Even as she felt her eyes grow heavy and her weariness weaken all her muscles, she fought the desire to go to sleep. She did not want to dream again. Instead, she grabbed yet another beer and drank it more slowly than the first two. When dawn came, several long hours later, she was past drunk. She was brain-dead. Twenty-some-odd cans of beer were stacked on the table or scattered on the floor around her. She was draped like a rag over the chair. Her hair lay limp around her face, covering her blood-shot, shadowed, sleepless eyes and the sallow tone of her face.

She did not react at all when Shinji emerged from his room and gasped to find her immobile in the kitchen. "Misato?" he called to her nervously. She heard him, but she couldn't seem to move at all, not even to lift her head and look at him. Shinji came up beside her and surveyed the evidence around her. "Not again…" he muttered sadly. He grabbed a plastic bag from a cabinet and slowly, meticulously placed all the empty Kirin and Sapporo cans inside it. When he was done, he tied up the bag and dropped it near the door so that he'd remember to take it to a recycling bin later.

Then he turned to Misato again. "Thanks…" she muttered in a thick, tired voice.

"No problem," he replied. He took one look at her, seemed to notice that she wasn't leaving her head draped painfully over the back of the chair completely by choice, and sighed. Carefully, he grasped her shoulders and pulled her back into a semi-sitting position. "You're really wasted, you know that?" he said as he struggled to get her into a good position.

"You think?" Misato replied, voice dripping with sharp sarcasm.

Shinji sighed and shook his head. "Come on, Misato, let's get you into bed," he said as he tried to pull her to her feet.

"No… I have work…" Misato muttered. "I need to—to change clothes. And… and get to work…"

"I don't think so."

"B-but… Ritsuko's expecting me."

"I think she'll understand you taking one day off. You've obviously been here most of the night…"

"Only since two this morning," Misato said as she stumbled toward her room with Shinji's shoulder under her arm.

"Like I said…" Shinji muttered. "I'll call Dr. Akagi, or anyone you want me to, and tell them you're sick."

Misato snickered, then winced. "That wouldn't even be a lie right now," she moaned.

"See? Now go to bed."

Misato tumbled onto her pallet, and Shinji carefully pulled a sheet up to her chin. Her cheeks flushed and he shook his head at her. He probably thought she was embarrassed that the fourteen-year-old was tucking her in like a child – which was true enough – but there were other, more powerfully embarrassing thoughts in her head at that moment. Like the last moments of her dream, and the beginning, when she had awoken with him by her side. Frustrated, she moaned and shook her head. Shinji took it for an indication that she had a headache, and ran off to get a painkiller or something. When he returned, Misato saw that he not only had a couple pills and a glass of water in his hand, but also a cool towel to put over her head.

"There. Now I need to get ready for school. You get some sleep," he told her firmly. A shadow of a smile flitted across Misato's features, though he did not catch it because he was turning toward the door. He sounded a lot less timid and wishy-washy than usual, she thought. More confident, more in control, like she was the child and he was the adult. He sounded a little like the Shinji in her dreams.

"Thanks… Shinji…" she mumbled as he walked out the door. He didn't reply, just closed her bedroom door behind him.

For a long while she simply lay there, listening to the apartment wake up around her. She heard the running water as first Shinji, and then a very grumpy, whiny Asuka took quick showers and returned to their rooms to dress into their uniforms. They both emerged again to eat a fast breakfast – probably left over pizza in Asuka's case and if she knew Shinji at all, he was going to stuff a single piece of toast in his mouth, swallow down a cup of hot tea, and call it that. Misato cringed, her headache exploding, as Asuka began her latest tirade. It started as an obnoxious rant about Shinji's annoying habits – the constant apologies, the whiny voice, his obsession with his estranged father – all of which were valid points, Misato had to admit, but which seemed so cruel and unfeeling coming from Asuka's lips. Somehow, however, the subject switched to Misato's inability to competently provide for them.

"And where is she, anyway?" Asuka asked suddenly. "Normally she's out here downing several dozen cups of coffee to drown her hangover before she goes down to the geofront."

Misato waited for Shinji to tell Asuka that her hangover had gone way beyond the stage during which coffee would do any good, and she wasn't going to work. But it never came. Instead Shinji said, "I don't know where she is. She must have gone in early. She was already gone when I woke up." Misato felt herself smile at Shinji's kind attempt to help her save face. Then she winced again and closed her eyes. A few minutes later she heard both her charges leaving for school. Not more than ten minutes after silence filled the apartment again, Misato was asleep.

She opened her eyes slowly, and sighed. She'd had another nightmare about her father. She could still see his face, haggard, blood dripping down his temple, into his eyes, from the corner of his mouth, as he shoved her into that escape pod and told her to live. She could not suppress the small sob that floated up from deep in her chest. Immediately, her lover's eyes flew open and he sat up to look down at her. Her hair was arrayed around her face, there were tears welling up in her eyes, and she looked extremely distressed.

"Misato?" he whispered softly. She blinked away her tears.

"Sorry I woke you," she whispered back. "I didn't mean to."

He smiled down on her softly. "It's alright. I don't mind. Bad dream?" he asked softly.

She nodded. "I had to watch my father die all over again. God, I wish the dreams would go away."

"I know. I'm sorry," he said tenderly. He leaned down and kissed her gently. "I don't have a morning class today. I'll make breakfast for you before you go to work, alright?" he said.

Misato gave him a small smile. "Thanks, Shinji."

"No problem." He climbed out of bed and pulled a shirt on over his bare chest, and a pair of faded jeans over his blue boxers. Then he disappeared out of the room to make breakfast. Misato glanced at the alarm clock on the bedside table near her head and sighed as she squinted through the dark room at the glowing green numbers. It was six thirty in the morning. She was due at work in an hour. With a sigh, she forced herself out of bed, kicking her blanket off angrily, and practically rolling off the mattress. She half-heartedly dug through the closet she and Shinji shared and pulled out a navy blue pant suit, that she quickly threw on. While she quickly combed her hair and put on her make-up, the smell of pancakes wafted into the bathroom. By the time she emerged from the bedroom, Shinji was placing two plates full of pancakes on the table.

"Breakfast is served," Shinji said with a smile.

She smiled back at him and sat down, happily digging into the pancakes in front of her. She took her time eating, talking to Shinji about his classes, and good-naturedly complaining about having to go into work.

Despite her complaints, however, she made good time getting to work and was even whistling as she unlocked the employee entrance to the small computer store she was the manager of. Except for those rare days when she didn't go into work, she was always the first one to the store. She'd unlock the employee entrance, get everything turned on, check the computers on the display floor, and then walk into her little backroom office to start going through the day's paperwork. Half an hour later Michiri would walk in through the side door with a song on her lips, just like today. She waved to Misato as she walked past the office, stashed her coat and purse in the small lounge area the employees had, and then unlocked the main customer entrance doors. A few minutes later, at exactly 8:06 every morning, Yamazaki walked in. Misato could set her watch by the man. These two employees would man the store until lunchtime, at which point Michiri would leave for college classes, and three more employees would come in to take care of the larger customer flow that always appeared during and after lunch.

That day, Misato was meeting Ritsuko for lunch. When noon rolled around, Misato grabbed her purse, locked her office door behind her, told Yamazaki she'd be back in an hour at the most, and left to meet Ritsuko. She arrived at the Italian restaurant Ritsuko had selected about five minutes before her friend did, and then they were seated and their orders were taken. Misato watched Ritsuko as the woman ordered her lasagna carefully. She was growing her bleached blonde hair out, Misato thought, though maybe it just looked longer because she hadn't seen the woman in a few months. It was somewhat disconcerting to see Ritsuko without her white lab coat, the one she wore over every skirt and shirt she owned. But today it wasn't there. Ritsuko was wearing black slacks and a bright red blouse with beading along the collar. She looked nice. She also looked nervous, Misato noted suddenly. And that was strange, because almost nothing bothered Rituko.

"Happy Birthday, Ritsuko," Misato said when the waiter had left to place their order in the kitchens. She handed Ritsuko a large envelope. Ritsuko smiled and opened it, to find a card and a bookstore gift certificate inside. The card was sweet, and the gift certificate was for fifty dollars.

"Thanks, Misato," Ritsuko said with a smile, and Misato got the impression that she actually meant it.

Misato shrugged. "I wasn't sure what to get you, so I copped out and got you a gift certificate. I would have preferred actually buying you something. But I seriously couldn't think of anything."

"This is great, Misato, really. There're a couple of scientific notebooks that just got published, and I was being too stingy to buy them. This is the perfect excuse to finally get them."

Misato laughed and shook her head. "Scientific notebooks… Man, you're crazy."

Ritsuko said, "no crazier than you."

The conversation turned to small talk for a long while, and Misato noticed that Ritsuko was still acting nervous, like she wanted to say something but wasn't sure she should. Misato was of half a mind to just ask her what the hell was wrong, when Ritsuko answered her question without it needing to be asked. "I saw Kaji yesterday," she said.

Misato gave her a confused expression. "What you mean you 'saw' Kaji? Of course you saw him. You work with him. You see him all day, every day."

Ritsuko blinked at her. "He didn't tell you?"

"Tell me what?"

"I haven't seen Kaji in a month – until yesterday, of course."

Misato was now even more confused. "What? Why not? Was he gone somewhere? Some mission or somewhere?"

Ritsuko shook her head. "No. He left Nerv a month ago."

"What!" Misato couldn't help it, she surged completely out of her chair before she could stop herself. Half the restaurant turned as one to stare at her, wide-eyed, startled, and angry at being disturbed. She coughed lightly, embarrassed, murmured an apology, and sat back down.

"You can't be serious," she said to Ritsuko.

"I'm completely serious. I'd thought he'd told you."

The waiter appeared with their food, and their conversation halted long enough for the dishes to be placed in front of them. They took a few moments to try their entrees, and then Misato sighed and looked down at her hands. "Almost four years I hadn't seen, talked to, or heard from him at all. Then he pops up out of nowhere three days ago. I should have known something had happened. Why did he leave?"

"Essentially the same reasons you did I would assume. We never really discussed his decision. He just told me he was planning on leaving, and two days later he had his resignation on Gendo's desk," Ritsuko told her. "Look, you can discuss that with him all you like. That's not what I wanted to talk about. He told me about you and Shinji Ikari."

Misato's eyes flew open wide and fixed on Ritsuko's face. She couldn't decide if she was furious that Ritsuko wanted to have this discussion as if she were an errant child, or relieved that she would finally have another woman to talk to about it. "Really…?"

"Yes. Really. Why didn't you tell me about it, Misato? We've been talking on the phone every couple weeks, e-mailing eachother, but you couldn't find the time to tell me you were dating my boss's nineteen year old son?"

Misato flinched when Ritsuko mentioned his age. "I just… It just didn't occur to me that you'd care. And, well, I was afraid Gendo might read over your shoulder or check all incoming emails or something and find out. And that would be bad."

"Yes, I imagine it would be," Ritsuko said dryly. "How long have you been seeing him?" she asked.

"We started talking about a year after I left Nerv. We started dating right after he turned eighteen."

"So, a little over a year then?"

"Yeah, I guess."

"Are you actually living with him?"

Anger flared in Misato. Not this again. He was an adult now. It was perfect legal. Why did these people care what the two of them did, anyway? "Yes. Why do you care?"

"Don't get all defensive on me, Misato," Ritsuko said blandly. "I'm just trying to understand this. "How long have you two… been living together?"

Misato smirked, half-amused, half-appalled by Ritsuko. "In other words, how long have I been sleeping him, right? He moved in two months ago, at the start of the fall semester. We started sleeping together about a month before that. Why? You want to hear about our first time, huh, Ritsuko?" she asked suddenly in a bitter, angry voice.

"Misato…"

"Want me to tell you? It was all very romantic. Who knew Gendo Ikari's estranged, apathetic son could ever be romantic, but he grew out of his apathy, and he learned how. He cooked dinner… There were candles everywhere. All over the house. His teacher, the one he got left with, she was gone for the weekend. We had the place to ourselves. You want to hear more? Huh? Gonna relay all of this to Kaji, aren't you? Well, aren't you?"

Ritsuko flinched at that last question. She sighed. And then she said something Misato had not expected. "He's still in love with you."

Misato blinked. "Kaji?" Ritsuko nodded. Misato felt all the air leave her lungs, she felt her heart spin in violent circles, felt her stomach twist in a billion knots. How many times had she dreamed to hear those words? How many times during those long lonely months after she left Nerv did she dream, and hope, and pray that he would come for her, tell her he loved her still, beg her to forgive him for not coming with her in the first place? "God…" she whispered.

"He wanted me to talk to you, see if there was any hope that you might take him back. I told him I'd help if I could. You two were always so good together in college. And then when he came back to Nerv HQ after spending all that time in Germany… I thought things would finally work out, and the two of you would stop squabbling and pushing eachother away, and get married and settle down… and all that. But it never happened, and that always made me sad," Ritsuko said softly.

"Ritsu…" Misato whispered, shocked. It was very unlike her friend to be open like that. Hell, she was being downright emotional, atleast compared to her normal behavior. And everything she said was true. Kaji and she had been good together. And Misato had always thought things would work out the way Ritsuko did. It broke her heart that it hadn't, even though she was the one who ran away. But now…

"He seemed to be very afraid that you were too in love with Shinji Ikari for it to matter though," Ritsuko added.

Misato froze. Shinji. Good God, she'd nearly forgotten about Shinji. She loved Shinji now. Whole-heartedly. What did she care how Kaji might still feel about her? Shinji loved her and she loved Shinji. Period. She took a deep breath and shook her head.

"He's right," she told Ritsuko. "I love Shinji now." With that she stood up, grabbing her purse from the chair beside her as she did. "I've got to go," she said softly, not even bothering to acknowledge her still half-full plate of chicken alfredo, and dug out two twenty dollar bills to put on the table. "Happy Birthday, Ritsu," she said. And she left before Ritsuko had a chance to object.

Misato breathed in deep and let it out slowly. That had been very close. For a moment, she had come very close to letting the old her take over the new her. She had come very close to letting the memory of a love that no longer was destroy the reality of a love that was real and strong. Shaking her head to clear it of the confusion and anger and shock that seemed to be rotting her brain away, she muttered: "I need a drink." Then she forced herself to drive back to work rather than go home like she really wanted to.

The rest of the afternoon went by fairly quickly. She pushed all thought of Kaji out of her brain and focused on her job. Despite the effort to not think about Kaji, however, her conversation with Ristuko had put her in a foul mood. Yamazaki seemed to sense it, though she was trying her best to hide it, and spent most of the afternoon shielding her from any problems the customers or other employees might have. She was almost annoyed at being so cavalierly "handled," as if he was afraid she had no control over her temper, but mostly she was just grateful for the reprieve.

She had nearly worked herself back into a good mood when she received a blow to her frustrated nerves. Kaji walked in the door just as she was getting ready to leave. It was five o'clock, and she wasn't required to close because Yamazaki took care of that part. She was looking forward to getting home and seeing Shinji and putting the entire day out of her mind. And then Kaji walked into the store, greeting her with a cheerful: "Hey there, Beautiful."

Yamazaki glanced at Kaji, and then at Misato, and raised an inquisitive eyebrow at her. He had met Shinji, and knew that this man who had suddenly appeared was not her boyfriend. Misato gave Yamazaki a pointed look that very loudly said: mind your own business, then replied to Kaji's cheerful greeting with a sour: "Kaji, what're you doing here?"

"I just came by to visit you," he told her.

"Well, I'm leaving. I'm off now, and I'm going home," she said.

Kaji took hold of her wrist, not in a threatening way so much as an intimate way, and asked softly, "Take a walk with me before you go?" She could hear it in the tone of his voice, the silent part that said: before you go to him.

She sighed, and was about to refuse when she looked up into his dark eyes and felt a pang in her heart. What harm would one little walk do, she asked herself. "Alright, Kaji. But it can't be a long walk, because I'll have to come back here to get my car before I can go home."

"Sure, sure, Babe," Kaji said carelessly as he dragged her out the front entrance of the store. They walked side by side down the sidewalk, past shops and restaurants, and for a few minutes they were completely silent. Kaji was still holding her wrist, which was distracting her more than she'd care to admit, but she couldn't think of a polite way to make him let go, so she endured it. Finally, she found her voice and fell into a light conversation about weather, which morphed into the topic of sports, and then shifted to Kaji's new job working for some electronics company.

"Essentially, I specialize in corporate espionage," he told her in a conspiratorial whisper.

Misato smirked. "I'm not surprised. It suits you."

For awhile after that they fell silent again. She couldn't think of anything to talk about that wouldn't lead to an argument or bring up memories she preferred to leave buried. She sighed and finally extracted her wrist from his grip, gently. Stuffing her hands in her pockets, she glanced up at the sky. They'd been walking for almost twenty minutes; it was quite a lot longer than she had intended. She was on the point of suggesting they turn around and head back to the store, when Kaji spoke up.

"How's Shinji?" he asked suddenly. Misato couldn't help but smile, caught between gratitude at his attempt to make conversation, and amused by his less than subtle reasons for asking such a question.

"He's fine. His classes keep him busy, of course. And he complains about them a lot – like we all do in college – but I think he's enjoying himself," Misato said.

"Good. A boy his age should enjoy school," Kaji said. Misato flinched and scowled at him. That was a hit below the belt. He smiled apologetically, though she didn't believe for a minute he was actually sorry, and added, "he wants to go into medicine, right?"

Misato nodded. "Yes. Possibly pediatrics."

Kaji nodded slowly and they fell silent for another minute as they walked down the street. "Oh look, speak of the devil," Kaji said suddenly, his voice filled with bitter amusement. He pointed toward a coffeehouse to their right. Misato turned and followed the direction of his finger, and sure enough, there was Shinji. He was sitting at one of the little outdoor tables along the side of the coffeehouse. Misato frowned then, for he was sitting with a young woman, a full-figured redhead wearing black pants that clung to her legs and a nice, yellow, lacy blouse.

"Oh… Who's the babe he's with?" Kaji said with a toothy grin. Misato elbowed him hard in the ribs, then walked towards Shinji and the woman while Kaji rubbed his injury and followed behind her. As she got closer, Misato saw a large cup of coffee in front of each, and a book laid out between them. But she also saw the way the red-head leaned forward over the table, inching closer to Shinji's face as he pointed out something in the book, and offering a fine view of her ample cleavage. Misato's mind flared with anger, but she managed to push it down and hide it behind a placid face as she walked up to the table. At that moment, Shinji happened to look up and see Misato's approach. He smiled happily and stood to greet her, which did much to calm the anger boiling in her stomach, but did not quite silence it.

"Misato!" he exclaimed happily as she stepped up to him. "What're you doing here?" he asked. Without giving her time to answer, Shinji leaned forward, cupped a hand against the back of her neck, and gave her a resounding kiss.

When he let go, Misato smiled lovingly, and answered: "Just going for walk before I headed home. What're you up to?" In her heart, she felt herself demanding to know what he was doing with another woman, but she knew it was ridiculous and she prided herself on the fact that her sudden jealousy was well hidden behind her eyes.

Shinji shrugged innocently: "studying, as usual." He started to turn back to the redhead when he froze and glared over Misato's shoulder. Misato glanced behind her to see that Kaji had caught up, and was standing behind her patiently. And she had to suppress a smile. Passive, reserved Shinji had just glared outright at Kaji, without any apparent desire to hide how he felt about seeing the man with his girlfriend. "Hello, Kaji," Shinji said, his voice just barely above icy. It seemed Misato wasn't the only one suffering from terminal insecurity and jealousy.

"Hey, Shinji, long time no see," Kaji replied amiably enough, but Misato thought she caught an undercurrent of something in his voice -- though what, she wasn't sure.

Instead of replying to Kaji, Shinji turned back to the girl who was watching this exchanged bemusedly from her position on the other side of the table, and said: "Sorry, Asuka. This is Misato Katsuragi, my girlfriend. Misato, this is Asuka Soryu. She's in my organic chemistry class, and I'm helping her out."

Misato held her hand out to Asuka, and said with a polite smile, "Nice to meet you, Asuka."

"Likewise," Asuka replied. Misato was quite aware that neither of them meant it.

Shinji then glanced at Kaji and began awkwardly, "and this is Kaji Ryoji, um…"

"A friend of Misato's," Kaji interjected, finishing Shinji's sentence and taking Asuka's hand enthusiastically.

"How nice to meet you," Asuka replied as she smiled at Kaji brightly.

"Won't you please join us?" Asuka asked a moment later, sounding for all the world like a gracious hostess inviting a pair of vagabonds into her mansion. Kaji's eyebrows flew up into his hairline, and Misato fought back a snicker, and even Shinji found her tone comical -- Misato could tell by the way his eyes lit up in his otherwise passive face.

"Of course," Misato said, and she pulled a chair close to Shinji's before sitting down. Kaji sat opposite her.

"I didn't realize you had a girlfriend, Shinji," Asuka said. "Why didn't you tell me?" Her voice was innocent, but Misato understood the glint in her eyes, even if Shinji did not.

"Must have slipped his mind," Kaji interrupted as Shinji opened his mouth to answer. Misato narrowed her eyes and debated who she wanted to glare at more: Kaji, for the sarcastic remark, Shinji, for letting it slip his mind, or this Asuka girl from saying something intended to insult her.

Shinji looked confused, and said innocently, "It just never came up. What does Asuka care if I have a girlfriend or not?" Misato couldn't help smiling at this. That was her Shinji, naïve and oblivious. Asuka didn't look amused, however. Her eyes flared for a moment and Misato could guess what Asuka was thinking. The redhead had heard a hidden meaning in Shinji's words -- a hidden meaning that said: 'What does she care? I wouldn't be interested in her whether I had a girlfriend or not.' Misato knew Shinji had meant no such thing. But Asuka was royally pissed by what she perceived as an insult. Misato's smile widened almost gleefully.

For a few minutes, Kaji managed to steer the conversation to smalltalk. How they were doing. How great the weather was. What Shinji and Asuka were doing in their organic chemistry class. But when he turned to amusing anecdotes about the people at his new job, Asuka turned to Misato with a barely hidden derisive smile, and asked: "So what do you do, Misato? You look too old to be a student. How old are you anyway?"

Misato glared at her and saw Shinji flinch just slightly.

"Asuka," Shinji said softly, his voice a cross between annoyance and a whine.

But Misato smiled at him and said to Asuka, "You're right. I am too old to be a student. I'm thirty-three."

"Thirty-three! You're almost fifteen years younger than her, Shinji!" Asuka gasped.

Shinji nodded. "I know."

"So what is it you do, Misato?" Asuka inquired.

"I'm the manager of a computer store."

Asuka sighed. "Sounds so mundane. I feel so sorry for you," she said, sounding sympathetic of a life Misato must find boring and unfulfilling, instead of what Misato knew she really was: condescending.

"It's a little mundane, yes," Misato replied with an appeasing smile, as if she was talking to a small child who just didn't understand about life. "But I find that I enjoy the quiet, simple life I have now. After the life I used to lead."

"Oh, that sounds mysterious," Asuka smiled, and Misato could tell on Kaji's face that even he caught the sarcasm this time.

"Ladies…" Kaji began worriedly.

Misato glanced at him and shrugged. This was getting ridiculous. "No. It wasn't that mysterious," she told the redhead, trying to end the conversation. "So, Shinji, how were your other classes today?" she asked.

"Well…" he began.

But Asuka interrupted him. "No, really. You have me very curious, Misato. What kind of career could you have had that was so stressful that you would actually enjoy something as boring as being the manager of a store?"

"It's not important," Misato said.

But at the same time, Shinji said in a voice bristling with annoyance and insult: "She worked for a secret government agency if you must know, Asuka. She was a highly important Major in command of some very important government experiments."

"Shinji…" Misato whispered.

Shinji did not stop however. "In fact, that's how I met her. She worked for my father."

"Really?" Asuka said, sounding skeptically.

Misato moaned and put her face in her hands. This was getting out of hand. Talking about her former career was not something she could or wanted to do.

Unfortunately, Kaji joined Shinji's defense of Misato by adding: "It's true. I worked for the same agency. We worked together since we graduated from college."

"Okay, that's enough of that," Misato said suddenly. "Why don't you tell her our ID numbers while you're revealing every other government secret you can think of!" she snapped at Kaji angrily. She turned to Shinji. "Thanks for trying to defend me from your friend's ignorant contempt, Shinji, but I'm quite capable of handling a little girl like her – or ignoring her insults if that's what I wish to do." She stood up, annoyed with everyone at that table, including herself. "Now, if you'll excuse me… I'm gonna walk back to my car and go home and start dinner. I'll be there whenever you decide to show up, Shinji."

She turned and walked away as Kaji called to her and Shinji sat there, stunned. As she left the coffeehouse she heard Asuka say quite loudly: "you live with her?" Misato smirked. But suddenly, someone was grabbing her arm. She spun around and found Shinji firmly holding her arm and smiling apologetically.

"I'll go home with you, okay?" He was holding his organic chemistry book in his free hand and affectively ignoring Asuka's voice calling to him and apologizing for her rudeness. Misato smiled at him, moved her arm so she could hold his hand, and nodded. Feeling immensely better, she walked down the sidewalk hand in hand with her lover.

And then she was awake again. The sun was pouring in through the small windows of her bare room, and the alarm clock read: 12:31 pm. She had been asleep for several hours. "Damn…" she whispered. Sitting up and throwing a sheet off her legs, she ran a hand through her dark, sweat-damp hair. "Not another one," she breathed. This was insane. What was going on? Why was she having dreams about Shinji? She couldn't possibly be attracted to him. Not like that. It wasn't possible. She was a twenty-nine year old woman, and he was a fourteen-year old boy. It was impossible.

Wasn't it?