LOL well, I updated Shadow Creature, so I thought I should do the same for Broken. I know I'm updating really fast...hope it doesn't annoy you. -blinks, peeks out from behind Robin- I'm...alive? I'M ALIVE! Thank you for your mercy.
The Wings of a Raven: True...now I suppose you're realizing why the story is titled Broken? Here I am, updating quicker. Ya gotta love spring break.
Tecna: Thank you, and yes sir or madam as the case may be.
jambey: LOL well I'll just ignore the name and consider you as jambey. True...I gave this quite a bit of thought, cuz heck, I think everyone would agree that, though Slade is a tough nut, in a fair fight, I repeat, in a fair fight, Bats wins Slade big time. The fight was not fair, and that is the only reason Slade won. Uh...I hate to say this, but...he's gone. :( -cries hysterically- Weird...he's gotten to you too! I was so freaked out tho...I mean, Robin's last words to Raven being a direct Slade quote! Exact! Gah, I swear he sneaks in here when I'm asleep and shoots me full of probes... -checks under bed, in closet, in laundry basket- YES! It's like, geez, let someone else have a turn!
raeandrob4eva: Uh... -nervous sweat drop- Yeah, I made him especially evil...gah, it scares me how evil he was. I wrote the chapter and Mom was wondering why I was acting so weird...made me sad for quite some time. LOL mine do it...change from green to gray to blue, depending on mood I guess. LOL lately they've been gray...I wonder what that says?
King Cheetah: LOL zesty? Nice word. Yes sir...you are a sir, right?
CelticHeiressFiona: Why Batman? As Stupid said, he's guilty by association. I know...I'm mourning his loss just as much as you (tho I doubt you'll believe me). Yes, I shall do so.
CloudsHalo: Yup. LOL I heavily implied it for the last few chapters, so I didn't expect it to shock anyone. Nah, I'm afraid he is pretty darn dead. LOL well I'm glad it was entertaining. That works just fine for me...I never said reviews must be long; reviewing at all works for me, though I do like to hear a bit about what you liked/disliked in the chapter. I can pretty much predict what you will say about this one though lol. Thanks.
Furubafun24: I know...it made me sad, and I wrote it! Thanks...I was really worried, cuz we all know Bats has quite a following...I can't believe I was brave enough to even write it. That's interesting, cuz I struggled for a bit on that one: wondering if it was out-of-character, if it sounded cheesy, so I'm really glad you liked it. Nah, you're not a pansie. Yeah...I considered ending it without him ever telling Robin...but that was just too mean, so I changed my thinking. Thanks so much, I'm really glad you liked it!
Aeris-Raven: Yeah...it's ok. It was a rainy day, I was feeling weird...and it just sorta happened. I feel a bit ashamed of it really...not exactly something I would want my mother to read. Yeah, I'm so glad I am...I barely hung on this long...little scared about the research paper I have to write by next Monday, but hey, I've got time. (Robin: Yeah, you'll be saying that riiight up to Sunday night) Quiet, I'm trying to write here! Slade has no heart. I considered that...LOL just kidding, just kidding...don't hit me. Revenge...ah, revenge is not nearly as sweet as it is cracked up to be. I'll do my best :)
Mystyre: Yeah...personally, I think Slade wouldn't be above just bumping someone off in one quick, clean shot. No! I will not...I cannot! ...at least, I'm pretty sure I won't...It all depends on whether or not I figure out a way to get Slade out of my room! Batman wouldn't have died at all if it wasn't for him breathing on my shoulder the whole time...and his breath is far from pleasant. OUCH! -rubs head- Ok, ok... Gr...if only it could be so...
DeathIsOnlyTheBeginin: I know...I almost didn't dare write it. Thanks, I tried. Nah, it's fine. -blushes- Thanks:) Sure, I'll be sure to stop by. I'm sure it's not crap...no put downs, they're bad for your soul! Thanks, I'll do my best to keep it going!
LadyHood: Thanks...lol I've tried my hand at romance and humor...but I'm not sure if it's really my thing. Yeah, she's still stuck in the room. Sorry for ignoring her, I swear the next chap will catch you up on her and the rest of the titans. Thanks so much:)
Chica De Los Ojos Cafe: Is that good or bad?
Vanimal: "Fair fight" being the key words. Correct me if I'm wrong, but Batman does not have any superpowers, such as regeneration, indestructibility, etc. So by my reasoning, he is just as vulnerable to a bullet at that specific range as the next guy.
ON WITH THE STORY!
"You heard me, Dick."
"But I need to do this! What, do you think I can't handle myself? I can do this, Bruce! If you would just give me a-"
"Chance?" Bruce had that stubborn set to his mouth, the one that said he was not going to even consider budging from his decision. "I've given you a chance, Robin. I've given you so many chances I've lost count. Why should this one be any different?"
He sighed, running a hand through spiky black hair. "Look, I know that, ok? I know I've screwed up...a lot. But that's why I need to do this! I know I could do it if you would just let me try!" I'll prove it to you, Batman. I'll show you that I'm worth something.
He was right. You should have stayed. If you had, he wouldn't...he wouldn't be...
Bright red and green balloons littered the entrance hall, tied in great big bunches all the way up the banister. A huge banner reading "Happy Birthday Dick!" was stretched from one end of the room to the other. Alfred and Bruce were standing at the foot of the marble staircase, smiling gently at him.
"How...how did you-"
"It was in the information packet, along with social security number and blood type."
He shut his mouth, a strange feeling welling up in his chest as he stared around the room...the colors meant a lot of things to him. They were comforting and painful at the same time, but he was glad to see them. "Th-thanks...this, uh...this is nice..." he stuttered, swallowing hard and staring down at his sneakers. A hand touched his shoulder gently, and he looked up into the face of his guardian. For the first time since he came here, the face was neither frightening nor intimidating. Bruce Wayne's eyes were...sympathetic, understanding. He felt a weak smile creep onto his face, as though Bruce was giving him strength through that firm grip. "So...we got cake, or what?"
A fresh wave of tears overpowered him, leaking from blood-shot eyes to fall on a dirty concrete floor. Gone. Not coming back.
"What do you want, Batman?"
"Why so hostile? Am I not allowed to call and talk, or something?" The mask hid his face too much to decipher anything about his emotions...if he even had any.
"If this was just a friendly chat, there wouldn't be a problem. Regardless to what you might think, I'm not stupid. The Dark Knight never calls without a reason."
Batman either accepted this or chose not to argue. "How are things there?"
"And by that you mean: am I using my crutches, am I getting enough sleep, am I eating, am I resting and not training or trying to help with anything or making myself useful in the smallest degree? Well, lucky you, I am doing all those things, so I guess that covers everything, right? I'll be sure to schedule an appointment if I have any questions or comments." Anger and shame boiled to the surface, turning him into an erupting volcano. Most of that was a lie, but what else could he say? Nothing that wouldn't make Batman lose any semblance of trust he might still have in him.
"Robin-"
"NO!" he yelled, terminating the link before Batman could utter a single syllable.
He could never undo that. He could never take back all those hateful words. He heard them again and again in his mind, stabbing at him and filling him with regret beyond anything he had experienced in seven years. Would this ever go away? Did he deserve to be released from this pain?
"Dick, I know...I haven't really showed it all that much." Bruce chuckled weakly. "Well, ever, but...please know...please know that...I love you. I love you like my son. You are my son. Never...forget that." His hand dropped limply at his side, his breathing slowed, and his eyes began to close.
He didn't deserve that love.
Bitter tears burned into his soul, stinging on cheeks raw with salt water. He knelt, bent over in pain, forehead pressed into the cold concrete floor, sobbing and shaking. How long had it been? An hour? A day? A week? It was one endless stream of tears, of the horrible bleeding in his heart, of the empty ache filling his entire being. Sometimes he was angry, furious, driven insane with rage. He beat the floor, beat the walls, kicked and screamed and pummeled the cold, unfeeling ground in hatred and wrath so deep, so allconsuming that he thought he would surely die or kill himself. But then there were the times of sadness, of misery so complete that it seemed to weigh on his spirit, dragging him to the floor and chaining him there as his mind tormented him with the same painful memories, played over and over before his eyes. Those times were much worse than anger, much worse than hate. The pain...the horrible helplessness. It was more than he could bear.
"When I was eight, my parents...they were killed." Why am I telling her this? I don't have to, I can just shut up right now... "I...I couldn't save them. I tried...I think in some ways I'm still trying." Robin choked, and he fell silent, fighting to maintain control. "Mom used to call me Robin...that's why..." His voice was shaking too much for speech. Why was he torturing himself? Why did he have to break open old wounds?
A kiss...so warm, so tender, so perfect...love. At that moment, he knew what it meant. Love was Raven.
The memory was strange to him, a thousand years ago and a million miles away. He no longer wanted to know that word. Love was pain. Love was vulnerability. Love was weakness. Love couldn't stop that bullet. Love couldn't make his parents breathe again. Love couldn't save Raven. Love was nothing.
"Robin, you are never alone."
"And if Slade ever really does come back, we'll be ready."
Lies.
"Borrowed? Dude, you've been working for Slade?" Beast Boy yelled, glaring at him.
"Robin, you have...changed. I do not know this new person. I feel the sickness for my Robin, my friend. Please, tell me where he has gone." Her emerald eyes were swimming in tears, searching for something that was all-but dead.
"That mask hides what you truly are, Dick," whispered Slade, crouching down beside him. "Under that mask, you're just an average fifteen-year-old. Under that mask, you are weak...afraid. Without Robin, you are nothing. And you know it."
"Things aren't working out. No offense man, but you've changed...a lot. We've had to fight without you for months now, and we did just fine. In a team, the majority rules, and...we've voted for a new leader." Cyborg's face was cold, calculating. His eyes looked him up and down as though picking out all his flaws and deeming him unworthy.
"Get out of here." The tone of her voice froze his heart, sending an icy wave rushing through his body. He had never hated himself more than he did now.
His friends couldn't, wouldn't, save him anymore. Batman couldn't come to the rescue anymore...thanks to him. One by one, he had shoved away anyone who had ever cared for him, isolating himself and sealing every exit. He was in a self-made prison, stronger by far than these concrete walls and locked doors. There was no escape.
"Begging? Have you really sunk that low, Robin?"
"I am the thing that keeps you up at night, the evil that haunts every dark corner of your mind. I will never rest, and neither will you."
"Our dreams are spawned from our thoughts. Our thoughts become our actions. Our actions become who we are. You might as well stop running, Robin. You will destroy yourself. Your mind is already slipping, my dear boy. Come to me, and end your torment."
"So, how does it feel, Robin? When your parents died, you thought you would never love again. And then Wayne came along, and no matter how he treated you, you still loved him like a father. How ironic that you should lose him as well."
"Why not? He never cared about you, Robin. You were never more than his personal slave. You weren't his son, Robin."
He was just so tired...
"She can't save you, Dick. No one can save you now. I am your only hope."
What strength he had remaining vanished, the aching, gnawing pain in his stomach tearing him up from the inside. He flopped weakly to the side, drawing his knees up against his chest and wrapping his arms around them, trying to ignore the pain of his body, and the pain of his mind. So tired...
"You win, Slade." His voice was strange to his own ears, barely above a whisper. It was cold, indifferent, emotionless. It froze him over on the inside, sending shivers up his spine as the darkness pressed in on him, caging him like some poor, tired beast that could no longer feel the whips cracked at it. He was done. "You win."
Ok, so if you were confused, a crap-load of those flashbacks were excerpts from either Aftereffects or Broken, and then the rest were just ones I made up and some quotes from the actual show. Hope you enjoyed that...hope it's not confusing. -Dusty