Author: Nefertili
Fandom: Inuyasha
Rating: PG13
Pairing(s): Sesshoumaru/Kikyou, Sesshoumaru/OC
Genre(s): Romance, Angst, Adventure, AU
Warning(s): Battle scenes, betrayal, over-anger (if there is such a word), fluff... What more can I say?
Disclaimer: None of the characters, except perhaps some, are mine. They are owned by Rumiko Takahashi.
Summary: Kikyou, being saved from peril by Sesshoumaru, joins him in a quest against Naraku and one of his allies, who happened to share a past one-sided relationship with the Demon Lord. SesshKik!
A/N: Another chapter up, yay! Don't think me weird, but I actually went off stargazing by myself and even watched Disney's Beauty and the Beast to rekindle my dying muse. I am battling impending writer's blocks as best as I can!
...o0o...
Winter carried on its usual slow, icy pace, but Sesshoumaru still led his own company in their journey through the snow-covered land as though the seasons meant little. With Kikyou back, Rin had resumed her normal chatters and thus filled the air around them with life in the dead of the cold season. They had reached a rocky stretch of the land, and the landscape abounds with monolithic rock formations made of a dark type of stone. At the bases and at the crowns of these dark monuments were evergreens, thus adding a splash of fresh vegetation in the otherwise empty winter wilderness.
Trekking among the cold rocks proved to be tedious, for besides having to watch one's step so as not to fall into an untimely death, the snow had made the dark surfaces rather slippery, if not unfit for climbing. Sesshoumaru, being a youkai of great stamina and might, did not find it particularly hard to scale the uneven cliffs, but he chose to keep his pace slow for his companions' sake. He took the extra effort to somehow trace a path among the rocks for them to follow, but it did not make the task of climbing much easier.
Kikyou and Jaken were forced to put their efforts together so as to assist Rin in guiding Ah-Un through the perilous crags. The two-headed dragon seemed to over-cautious of the deep clefts, and he had to be constantly coaxed and forced through the irregular surfaces many times that day, thus making their journey comparatively slow compared to their past travels.
"Come on, Ah-Un, move!" Jaken said through gritted teeth (if he ever had teeth). A winter fog was beginning to obscure the fading light of the sun, which had begun to sink in the western side of the horizon. The dragon let out a low growl from the deeps of its throats, as the little toady demon lightly struck its hind legs with his Staff of Heads to make him climb up a narrow ledge.
Kikyou, who was pulling at Ah-Un's reins at the front, had gritted teeth as well. Her hands were beginning to sore from having to pull at the leather reins for a long time; her feet dug into the snow as she put forth her efforts to tug the dragon up the incline. The miko flinched at the cold that pierced through the thin soles of her sandals, but she complained not.
Letting out a tired breath that came out of her mouth as a cold puff, Kikyou let her right hand hold at random protrusions of the rock wall to her right while her other hand clutched at Ah-Un's reins and pulled. To her left was a sheer drop that was lost in the evening mist. All that she could see down the crag were a couple of treetops sticking out of the dreary fog. No wonder Ah-Un was being so difficult. Any weak soul would not survive the dizzying climb.
Suddenly, Kikyou stepped on some loose rocks beneath a thin covering of snow, and she would have descended down the white fog right then and there if not for her tight hold on the rock face. Rin, who sat on Ah-Un's back, let out a scream and placed her hands over her eyes for fear of what might happen to the miko.
"I am all right, Rin," Kikyou called out in a whisper, making the little girl peek through gaps of her fingers. Nodding out an assurance to Rin, she guided the two-headed dragon to step safely through the weak rock, and Kikyou took a moment to gather her lost breath. Guiding a dragon through a perilous rock face is no easier than shooting demons out of the air!
When she thought she was spent, Sesshoumaru, who was watching them expressionlessly from further up the ledge, led them into a hollow in the rock that was large enough to hold them all beneath its vaulted ceiling. Once inside, Jaken collapsed against the rough rock wall of the hollow and took in gulps of breath noisily to regain strength lost in a day of hauling Ah-Un up the rock formation.
Kikyou, after helping Rin climb down Ah-Un, who immediately curled up in a corner to sleep, stood up to face Sesshoumaru, who was eyeing her near the entrance of the cave.
"So, you idle youkai," she found herself saying out of utter exhaustion and irritation. "You find it amusing to stare at us while we labored to pull up your dragon up this rock while you just walk along as though it's nothing?"
"You didn't need my help, miko," Sesshoumaru said simply, choosing to ignore her rising temper.
"For a demon as blessed with a sharp mind as you, you are incredibly short-sighted sometimes," Kikyou replied, putting down her bow and arrow down the cold floor. Well-sheltered from the outside world, no snow reached their current place of lodging, but a cold spell still covered every corner.
A corner of Sesshoumaru's mouth moved up in a little grin, but he said nothing in reply, knowing that he might only stir up the miko's already sour mood if he did so. Instead, he withdrew to a shadowed corner and kept his peace.
Kikyou could not help but be irritated all the more by Sesshoumaru's refusal to talk to her, but she was distracted from her anger by Rin, who was looking up at her with chocolate brown eyes as she said, "Rin thanks Kikyou-sama for helper her guide Ah-Un throughout the day. Rin couldn't have done it without Kikyou-sama."
The Priestess felt her rising temper melt away at the child's innocence. She found the strength to smile again and Kikyou hugged Rin as she said, "That is nothing, Rin. I wouldn't mind doing that for you." A faint light began to illuminate the stone chamber as Jaken sparked up a fire on his Staff of Heads and thrust the staff between a few rocks he set at the heart of the cave to keep it from falling. They had not firewood; therefore, they had to rely on Jaken's staff for their fire.
"Are you hungry?" Kikyou asked of Rin as she sat the child close to the fire. The Priestess still had a carcass of a quail in a cloth bag hanging from her quiver. She had shot two of the birds the day before, when they were still in the lowlands, for Rin's food, but the child ate only one of the fowls. Kikyou did not normally hunt, but she had to, for she loved Rin.
"Rin's not hungry, Priestess Kikyou," the child replied. Rin then yawned and blinked sleepily. "But Rin is sleepy."
Kikyou grinned and helped the little girl unpack her sleeping bag. When Rin had slipped under the warm covers, she grasped Kikyou's hand and said, "Good night, Priestess Kikyou."
Kikyou patted Rin's forehead with her other hand as she said, "Good night, Rin." Almost at once, the little girl's eyes closed in sleep, but her grasp on the miko's hand remained the same. Carefully, Kikyou laid herself down beside Rin's sleeping figure and used her free hand as a pillow as she slept, the tired lines on her gentle face gradually fading as the night progressed.
Sesshoumaru, his face hidden in the shadows, tilted his head slightly as he observed the miko in her sleep. Fortunate was Rin, for she could hold Kikyou's hand and not earn resistance from the Priestess in turn. Fortunate was she, for Kikyou cares for her...
A flash of sadness came across the taiyoukai's eyes as he thought of Kikyou. There she was, so close yet at the same time so far away. She may respect him as an acquaintance, but will she ever see him as anything but a demon, the half-brother of her past lover, Inuyasha? And speaking of that dearest brother of his, how does Kikyou feel about him all these years? Sesshoumaru knew that a part of her would always love the hanyou, but she can't linger on heartbreak forever, can she?
'I have come to realize that I may be able to love again if I was given the chance, but...I doubt if anyone could stand to love a being made of clay and bones like me.'
'A wandering soul played upon by fate, that's what she is,' Sesshoumaru thought to himself. Inwardly, he was sad for Kikyou; he was saddened by her anguish and her pain. She, a woman who had longed to be free of the burden of the Sacred Jewel...trapped in a clay body that granted her no freedom at all. 'You don't deserve to suffer all these, Kikyou...'
...o0o...
Kikyou was wakened at the middle of the night by soft, almost indiscernible pounding of feet against pure white snow. Gradually, she opened her mahogany eyes and scanned the cave. Jaken's staff was still offering them fire, but its owner was somewhere in the corner, a big bubble of saliva forming in his open mouth as he slept. The Priestess woke up just in time to see a flash of Sesshoumaru's platinum hair disappearing among the rocks outside their cave.
'What are you up to, Sesshoumaru?' Kikyou thought. Gently, she pried Rin's fingers off her hand and tucked the child's hand under her quilt. Quietly, she stood up and went out of their haven, her sandaled feet making deep impressions in the snow. Her raven hair, untied and cascading down her back freely, gleamed in the light of the half-moon.
Kikyou looked around her to find a trace of the enigmatic taiyoukai, and she saw his regal form sitting near the crown of the rock formation they were climbing. Though the monolithic rock was not the highest in the region, Sesshoumaru's handsome features were incredibly heightened by the half-moon which shone on top of his head like a halo. His eyes looked rather melancholy, and Kikyou's heart wished to reach out to him and drive that sadness away, and nor could her eyes remove themselves from the ethereal Lord of the moonlight.
The miko searched the rock face for possible access to where Sesshoumaru was sitting, and she traced a rough path among the snow-clad rocks with her mind's eye before she set herself into climbing the rock face one more. Putting her feet against cold stone, and her hands against the rough surface, Kikyou managed to painfully hoist herself up and come nearer to Sesshoumaru. He looked at her with an unreadable expression before he said, "You shouldn't be wasting your efforts on an idle youkai, as you said."
Kikyou bit her lips upon recalling the rather rash words she gave to the taiyoukai earlier, and she carefully went around several huge rocks before she said, "Forgive me for my recklessness, Sesshoumaru. I was driven by exhaustion to say those thoughtless words; I am sorry."
Sesshoumaru made no comment about this, and nor did he change his expression or his stance when Kikyou closed the distance between them and sat down to his right. Deep inside, however, he was resisting the urge to take her hand in his. Her beauty was enhanced by the whiteness of snow, and it has been about a week since she and Kikumo had their duel. Her face was completely smooth again, and her hair crowned her head like a dark veil brimming with enchantment.
"Will you talk to me, Sesshoumaru?" she asked softly, staring at her hands folded on her lap. She did not look at the Demon Lord, for she might end up revealing her true feelings for the taiyoukai if she saw his face, which so haunted her dreams.
"What is it that you wish to talk about?" he asked in reply, his amber eyes gazing out at the misty wilderness beyond. Kikyou noted that there wasn't much coldness in his way of speaking.
"I wish to get to know you," Kikyou replied quietly, her hands constantly folding and unfolding in her lap. The night was cold, but she was oblivious to the cold of winter. "We have been together for weeks now, and all that we have barely been able to see through one another's facade."
"Is it really that important?" Sesshoumaru asked again, his expression neutral. Kikyou can tell that he wasn't exactly saying no to her request, but he was not entirely happy about it either.
"Well, if you don't wish to speak of it, it's all right," Kikyou said. Her hand reached for her raven hair, and she ran her fingers through the smooth lock of hair absentmindedly. "I would rather have it that I do not know you completely rather than earn your hate for all my life."
Sesshoumaru diverted his eyes from the misty landscape to look at Kikyou. The turn of her words suggested that she did not wish to set a rift of hatred between them. Could this mean...? Sesshoumaru shook the thoughts off his mind. Kikyou did not wish anyone to hate her, and this statement of hers did not come as a complete surprise to him.
"I do not have the reason to hate you, Kikyou," he found himself saying softly. Kikyou looked up from her previous position to hear him use her name in their exchange of words.
"Don't fool yourself, Sesshoumaru," she replied in a tone that was soft and sad. She recalled the night when he almost killed her in his anger, and she knew that the memory of her witnessing the scene between him and Kikumo will never fade away from his mind.
"Rather, you shouldn't fool yourself into languishing about things that are only of your imagination," Sesshoumaru replied. Simple as it was, Kikyou got his message that he did not detest her as she had previously thought.
"I guess you're right," Kikyou said after a moment of thinking. She propped her elbow on her lap and rested her chin on her hand. A cold wind passed over them, and the raven strands of her hair gently interwove with Sesshoumaru's platinum strands in a contrast as the light of high noon and the dark of midnight. Kikyou, becoming uneasy at the silence between them, changed the topic. "Was the Tenseiga of any importance to you, Sesshoumaru?"
"Given the chance, I would have exchanged the Tenseiga for my father's other sword, which is in the hands of my half-brother," Sesshoumaru immediately said, an air of ambition lacing his words.
"Even if it meant that you could never bring Rin back to life when she needed it so?" Kikyou asked, a knowing smile gracing her fine features as she looked at Sesshoumaru, anticipating his reaction.
Kikyou wasn't disappointed. Sesshoumaru was silent and he diverted his eyes from her gaze, trying to hide the expression in his amber eyes. But to Kikyou, that silence spoke of many things. The Tenseiga was important to Sesshoumaru to some extent. And as for Rin, he didn't revive her simply because he saw it as a test for the sword. He cares for the child as much as she does.
Kikyou removed her gaze from Sesshoumaru to scan the misty landscape spread before them. Though there was nothing interesting to see, she retained the peaceful smile on her face as she said, "Rin is such a wonderful child, endowed with such a caring and cheerful nature. She nursed me back to health after I dueled with Kikumo, did she not? And...Sesshoumaru, were you ever..." Kikyou broke off and lost her smile as she bowed her head.
Sesshoumaru turned from staring at the nothingness to face Kikyou. "What is it, Kikyou?" he asked, trying to catch a glimpse of her eyes, but her hair hid her mahogany orbs from view. She clearly wanted to say something that made her sad, that troubled her so much.
"Never mind," Kikyou replied, brushing off her last statement away. She wanted to ask if Sesshoumaru was ever worried about her when she sickened, but she chose otherwise. Why, wasn't his rescue of her from her imprisonment to the tree enough to prove that he cares for her, at least inside? And besides, judging by Sesshoumaru's composed personality, he would not answer her according to how he really felt.
The Demon Lord did not say anything about Kikyou's troubled mind, but he raised his head to look up at the heavens, searching for any possible star to give him the strength to ask the Priestess a question that troubled him as well. But the sky was covered with a thin sheet of cloud that only permitted the moon to shine through. The light of the stars were shut from the eyes of those on earth.
"What do you feel about my half-brother, after all these years?" The words slipped from his mouth before he knew it. To why he was asking it to her so freely, he didn't know. But does he have the right to know, really?
Kikyou's eyes widened a bit before she faced Sesshoumaru again, trying to fathom his reasons about asking such a question, but she couldn't quite understand the emotions in his amber eyes. Though calmness still dominated, there was a hint of unhappiness and strangely, betrayal glazing his eyes. Kikyou could not help remembering the mix of emotions she saw in the same eyes the night when Kikumo took the Tenseiga.
"If you must know, I still sustain some of my past feelings for your brother," she said slowly, searching for the right words. But no matter, Kikyou did not have the right strength of character to tell the taiyoukai about how she felt for him.
She was beginning to fall in love with Sesshoumaru, but how will he react to that matter? Could he stand the thought of her, the past lover of his hated brother, to give her heart to him? Will he think that she was only doing it to make Inuyasha jealous, especially now that it was clear that the hanyou feels something for her reincarnation, Kagome?
Sesshoumaru's heart felt a slight sting of pain, but he kept it to himself. Kikyou...he knew that the haze of his tangled emotions is slowly clearing to one thing: he was falling for the miko, but why? What brought him this far? Kikyou knew he disliked humans, and she would probably stare at him with wonder or even laugh at him if she uncovered his hidden feelings for her. And sweet heavens, will she think that it was only an act to get even with Kikumo's betrayal? Alas, too many questions!
He thought of his late father, Inutaisho, how he fell in love with a human with Inuyasha as a result. If only he was considerate enough of his father to think that he would also be put in the same situation...
"But...I am not sure if he's still the prime focus of my heart nowadays," Kikyou's voice barely reached his ears in his musings, but once it did, Sesshoumaru felt his insides jump in a whoop of triumph. So, there is a chance for both of them after all?
"And I wonder who is that lucky person reigning in your heart by now," Sesshoumaru found himself saying with an edge of sarcasm in his tone.
"Hmph, lucky person, huh?" Kikyou replied in the same tone. "Bet you're just jealous, Sesshoumaru?"
"Why would I be jealous, miko? Or could it be that you can't stand to stare at my face, woman?"
"Why would I want to stare at your face, taiyoukai? You think you're what I consider desirable? Clear your mind, demon."
"You difficult woman... You clear your mind! What male would have the spirit to fall for such a challenging human as you?"
"You sneaky youkai..."
They both stood up at the same time and faced the other to confront the other, but when they found themselves looking into the other's eyes, timidity overcame them both. Sesshoumaru's eyes widened for a second before he twisted his head to face his left. He felt himself going red in the face for the first time since he was the youngster. Kikyou, herself, instinctively diverted her gaze to face her left as well. She felt her cheeks becoming hot as a blush began to form on her face for the first time since she was resurrected.
Eventually, the awkwardness that came up between them dissipated a bit, and they found the strength to look at one another once more. They saw each other with a trace of a scarlet blush on the face, and Kikyou could not help but raise her sleeve over her face to hide her giggles. Sesshoumaru bit his lips to suppress the same amusement welling up from inside him. Kikyou looked extra-charming with the delicate flush on her cheek.
When Kikyou became conscious what she was doing, she let out a fake cough to hide her embarrassment and she lowered her sleeve from her face as she said, "Sorry about that, Sesshoumaru." But secretly, she enjoyed the little banter they had at the end of their little heart-to-heart.
Before Sesshoumaru could reply, he felt cold pinpricks sting his scalp, and when he felt through his silvery hair, the cold feel of snow reached his fingertips. Kikyou, herself, held out one of her hands to catch several of the falling frost. It was another drizzle of snow.
"We ought to go back to our shelter, Kikyou," Sesshoumaru told her. Though he could stand the cold weather, he did not wish to make Kikyou freeze outside to be with him.
Kikyou nodded and she made her way down the pinnacle of the rock. Halfway down, she stepped on a weak rock that crumbled under her weight. A soft cry left her mouth as she began to slip down the craggy heights. But she felt as though an electric shock hit her hand as a warm hand immediately reached for one of hers, and she looked up to see Sesshoumaru holding on to her, gently motivating her to pull herself up from the deep abyss.
Kikyou planted her other hand against the rock and used the leverage to hook herself up. She managed to hook one of her legs over the top of the stone, and once more, she was back up a firm portion of the tall monument. Sesshoumaru, who still did not let go of her hand, then gradually pulled her up from her kneeling position, making her stand up once more.
"Do I always have to rescue you, miko?" he said, trying to sound irritated, but Kikyou can tell that he secretly liked it. Having said so, he reluctantly let go of his grasp on the miko's hand and motioned for her to go ahead of him so he will be able to catch her in case another of the unfortunate rock slides happened.
But there was no need for that, as no further accidents followed the rest of their descent, and once more they were back in the little cave. Sesshoumaru had gone back to the shadowed corner of the little chamber, and Kikyou once more lay beside Rin. The Priestess smiled to herself and kissed the hand that Sesshoumaru had held before she went back to sleep, the events of the night playing repeatedly on her head.
...o0o...
Aaaaw, isn't the banter between our favorite miko and taiyoukai sweet? ;)