The torments of life
Chapter 8
After the funerals, some people reunited to Deb's house, it was mostly the family: Dan's parents, Keith, Nathan, Haley, Lucas and Karen.
The adults were all in the living room, while Nathan, Haley and Lucas were in what used to be Nathan's room. No one was speaking as if it would have killed them to do so. Nathan had enough of this silence.
"You know guys, it's not because we've been to funerals today that we have to keep up with the sad mood. Let's talk about something that is not link to any of this."
"Nathan, it wasn't any funerals it was your dad's, "said Haley.
"I know that Haley, but I had a life outside of my dad. The fact is, we all had a life outside of him and, I, for one, want to continue living this life."
Lucas didn't say anything, he had to agree with Nathan, they all had a life waiting for them. The only thing he didn't agree with, it was how Nathan was dealing with all of this. He had decided to put aside the fact his dad was dead, but sooner or later this would get back to him and it wouldn't be pretty.
"I suggest we talk about Lucas and two hot girls," said Nathan.
Lucas shot him a glance, saying: "did you really have to bring that up!"
"What do you want to know?" asked Lucas.
"How is it with them, since you came back?" Said Nathan
"Peyton barely talks to me and Brooke...well, she's been friendly to me."
"Does that mean you want to get back with her? Brooke, I mean," asked Nathan.
"No, I don't."
Haley spoke up: "I think is falling back for Peyton."
"Really?"
"Not falling back. It's more like, I keep falling for her and harder each day."
"Does she know?" Asked Nathan.
"Don't know, if she does she didn't learned it from me, but I think she must have some doubts about my feelings, that is, if she read my letter and…. she probably don't want to deal with it."
"You should tell her face to face" suggested Nathan.
"No, not yet. At least, I can tell her I wanna be her friend."
"Just friends? You're sure?" Asked Nathan.
"I want more, but for now, it'll do the job. I want to take baby steps."
"I see what you mean, but it seems to me you're taking turtle steps not baby's one."
"Whatever."
ooo
Deb was saying goodbye to Dan's parents.
"you know Deb, if you ever need our help, just ask. We'll be please to help you" said Dan's father.
"Thank you, I'll remember that."
"Kiss Nathan, for me, would you? Good bye Deb" add Dan's mother before leaving.
Deb walked back to the living room where Keith and Karen were.
"We should go too, said Karen, you must be tired and you certainly want to get some rest."
"No stay, I don't want to stay alone for the moment. Nathan will probably leave soon and I'd really like you to stay."
"Ok, we will" said Keith.
"I don't want to deal with tomorrow. The lecture of the testimony is really scary."
"It's tomorrow?" asked Keith.
"Yeah, with everything going on, I forgot to tell you that you were invited to the reading, Keith… and Lucas is too."
"He put Lucas in his testimony!" Exclaimed Karen, surprised.
"I guess he did, otherwise he would not be invited" said Deb.
"I'm just surprised. He never acknowledge him as his son" added Karen.
"I guess, he felt ashamed about what he did. We'll see tomorrow what it's all about" said Keith.
"I guess"said both Karen and Deb.
ooo
After the funerals, Brooke and Peyton went to Peyton's place.
"I feel so bad for Nathan and Lucas", said Brooke.
"I do too, but more for Nathan than Lucas. Nathan's been closer to his dad than Lucas ever been, although it wasn't always pure love."
"Yeah... Talking about Lucas what's the deal with you about him?"
"What are you talking about?"
"Don't play dumb with me Peyton Sawyer. You know exactly what I'm talking about."
"No, I don't."
"Come on, I've seen the way you act with him. When he tries to talk to you, you shut him off. I thought you wanted to be his friend. You're rough on him, for someone who wants to be his friend."
"I want to be his friend, it's just that... I'm not sure I'm ready. My heart is still aching. I have to be honest with you, Brooke... I think I still have feelings for him."
Brooke was speechless for a few seconds.
"You know, I still have feelings for him too, but I'm putting them on the side. Lucas is a great friend and I rather have him as a friend than resenting him because I still have feelings for him."
"Right now, I'm just not ready to deal with it. I have to sort things out."
"I understand."
"Brooke looked at the time and realised it was time for her to get back home."
"I have to go Peyt."
Ok, I'll see you tomorrow.
"Yeah, see you tomorrow, at Karen's cafe, girlie."
Brooke left the room and Peyton went to her desk and started drawing.
ooo
When Nathan and Haley left Deb's house, Lucas left with them, while his uncle and his mom were staying with Deb. He asked Nathan to leave him at the River court. There, he saw his friend Mouth, sitting on a bench. He walked up to him and sat beside him.
"What are you doing?" asked Lucas.
"Just some thinking."
"about?"
"About...Lucas, what do you do when you're falling for someone?"
"You're asking me? Me, the guy who doesn't have the guts to tell the girl he once loves that he still has feelings for her."
"Who are you talking about? Is it Brooke?"
"No, it's not her."
"Peyton, then?"
"Yeah… but don't tell anyone. I don't want to create another mess, right now."
"I won't."
"If you asked me this question, that means you like someone. Who is it?"
"Promise me, you won't be mad."
"Why would I be mad?"
"It doesn't matter, just promise."
"I won't be mad. So... who is it?"
"It's Brooke, Brooke Davis."
"wow... "said Lucas at loss of words.
"You're not mad, are you?"
"No, I'm not. My feelings for Brooke are simply platonic, plus, I told you my heart is still with Peyton."
"Ok, great!"
"So, you wanna tell her?"
"I don't know if I should… I might lose her friendship."
"Sometimes you have to take the risk."
"Why don't you follow your own advice?"
"I don't even have Peyton's friendship and I want to win her friendship before doing something. You, on the other hand, should tell Brooke. She likes you a lot, I can tell and she might have fallen in love with you too, who knows?"
"You think?"
"Do you want me to test the water?"
"If it's not too much to ask."
"It's not. I'll get back to you on this, but right now I have to go see Peyton and try to win her friendship."
"Well, good luck."
"Thanks. I won't forget to talk to Brooke, said Lucas, before getting up and leaving."
ooo
Lucas had walk all the way to Peyton's house. He was now in front of her house. He got to the front door and knocked on it. No one answered, but he was certain she was home. He try to turn the knob and succeed, he then pushed the door. He walked to her room, where loud music was coming from, like he thought it would. Her door was open; she was at her desk and was drawing. She was so beautiful when she was concentrate on something. He couldn't keep himself from staring at her. He missed her so much during those weeks in Charleston it was unbelievable. He raised his hand and knocked on her door frame.
Peyton's head jerked up. She stopped drawing when she saw it was Lucas. She put all her things away; she didn't want him to see her draw: it was of her and him in the dark. She had written in a corner: "Like someone is afraid of the dark, I'm afraid you'll break my heart, again."
"What are you doing here!" Asked Peyton with a cold voice.
Lucas felt hurt by her tone, but he could understand why she was so cold to him.
"I needed to talk to you."
"About..."
"You and I..."
"Go figure!" She interrupted him.
"It's not what you think."
"Oh, really?"
"Yeah...I just want you to let me be your friend. I care about you and I'd like you in my life the same way Brooke is."
"Why would I do that?"
"Peyton, let your guard down for a moment. I'm not planning on hurting you. All I want is to have something with you, something like a friendship."
"What if I'm not ready for that. What if I simply don't want to?"
"Than I'll wait for you. I'll wait as long as I have to."
"I wanna know something, first: Do you plan on staying or will you leave when Keith will get back to Charleston?"
"I don't know, it all depends on how things will turn out."
Peyton just looked at him, not sure if she was satisfied with is answer. Did it meant "if things go well between you and me, I'll stay, if not, I'll leave" or did he meant it in a general way. Should she take the risk anyway?
"I guess, I told you what I wanted to tell you, so I'll leave."
Lucas turned around and started to walk towards her bedroom door. Peyton was tempted to let him go without saying anything, but…
"Lucas, wait!" Pleaded Peyton.
Lucas turned around to face her.
"Yeah?"
"It's ok… I want your… friendship."
"That's great Peyton!"
"Don't get to excited, it won't be easy. I still need to put some order in my head about you and I, but I want to try this."
"I know this won't be easy, but I want to take the risk."
"I want you to take things slow, don't rush anything. Let things happen by themselves, ok?"
"Ok."
"I guess you can go now."
"I guess."
Lucas left her room and she got back to her drawing.
It might take a while before I can post the next chapter. Be patient, it'll come for sure.
Thanks to everyone who reviwed so far I really appreciate that, i hope you liked the chapter.