A/N:

1) inner dialogue is italicized

2) sorry this took so long. to be honest, i don't know how long it will be till the next chapter. i have part of it done...than again, i had parts of this chapter done a long time ago too.

CHAPTER 03 : Mental Wanderlust

The street lamps were lit by the time Kakashi turned the key to the front door.

If he could turn back time, he would.

If he had any place else to go, he'd go there.

Instead he sighed. The curtains billowed in mournful reply. The room had long ago resigned itself.

So the old man had been back. Which means...

It wasn't always fun and games being Hatake Kakashi.

...I have a lot of work to do.

Kakashi shut the door behind him, and surveyed the living room. New stacks often referred to as manuscripts crowded the walls. Furniture lay at strange angles, rearranged without regard for form or function or feng shui. Every available surface was peppered with refuse: bottles, cigarettes, cups, junk mail, crumpled paper, doilies, and even some leaves and twigs. Passing piles of dirty clothes and mysterious packaging, Kakashi waded through the debris, noting the mud tracks that graced the linoleum flooring.

In his irritation Kakashi failed to notice the stack of boxes that blocked his way. The top box toppled over. Books cascaded about him, thudding against his head and shoulders. Understandably his irritation deepened, until he noticed what book it was: Icha Icha Paradise's latest. A note fluttered past him, landing on his book-bag.

'Take one. Kimura will be by to take the rest. Will be in Venezuela. Ask Kimura for details. -J' was scrawled in simple black script.

Kakashi took two.

On some days, it almost paid to be Hatake Kakashi.

2 hours and 8 trashbags later and the living room could actually be lived in again.

He next surveyed the kitchen.

Well, at least this is my own mess.

With rolled sleeves he gathered and soaked and lathered. Apparently Jiraiya had eaten the rest of the strawberry short cake he'd made, and the one he'd bought from Montmartre Bakery. Baking, he'd discovered, was not his forte.

"Ah...stupid. Cake...stupid!...This can't be me" he thought, wincing. He hadn't seen Iruka at all after lunch, or the rest of the day. Didn't cake warrant at least a thank you?

Realizing he'd been scrubbing the same plate for the last five minutes, Kakashi shook his head. That was another thing. There went his concentration. He used to be so good at it too. Ever since coming across the freshman...he would have to fix this somehow. For a Hatake, being stupid and absent-minded just would not do.

After the kitchen, there was still homework to be done. Kakashi grabbed his books and settled in his room to read. First up was literature : Nabokov's Lolita in english. Infatuated with a kid? He could relate.

Kakashi was great at english. In fact, he excelled in it, had an excellent grasp of it. Excelsor. Exemplory. Latin root excellere. His english tests bore perfect marks. As did his math, and science, and humanities. There was no test he could not ace. During the driver's exam, his instructor had applauded his parallel parking technique. In sports he was top ranked, second only to Itachi Uchiha. He was tall and handsome, the quintessential "catch" and he knew it. The whole school knew it. So why didn't Iruka hurry up and know it? Kakashi pouted, flipping through a few more pages of Lolita.

Pursuing someone, for a change, was hard work.

Unlike a certain Humbert Humbert, Kakashi couldn't just kidnap Iruka, tempting as that alternative was. Icha Icha's methods were proving more harmful than helpful. The closet scenario of Volume 5 hadn't worked as neatly as he'd hoped. As for the other stories, Kakashi didn't have time to be a delivery boy, or a private gym instructor. He wasn't a football player either, and very much doubted if Iruka would ever agree to join the cheerleading squad. Police officer. Dentist. Masseuse. Cable repair man. Tutor. All nos.

Kakashi bit into his arm. Concentrate! On to book two. Iruka's not interested, he thought with a small pang. Better to use this time for pursuits that couldn't hurt you, like literature. Five minutes into Grapes of Wrath Kakashi stopped with a start.

Wait, what was the last one? Tutor? Tutor...tutor...the word burned into his brain, made the tip of his nose tingle. Tutor. He was a genius after all. He could tutor. Iruka was smart but not a genius. He could need a tutor. Kakashi went on thinking, homework all but forgotten.

Across town-

Iruka was used to being a little strange. He couldn't look normal, not with a slash across his face, but he'd grown accustomed to the stares. He often didn't feel normal because frankly, his life wasn't. His parents had died a few years ago in, of all things, an accident with the Nine Tails Moving Company. Their little car hadn't stood a chance against a massive moving truck. Iruka rubbed his scar absentmindedly.

So Iruka didn't have some things that a lot of other kids did. On top of that, he was the new kid at Konoha High, and his guardian was the new principal, and now, all thanks to that asshole, everyone knew he'd kissed a guy. No, had been kissed. He was sure he hadn't kissed back. As for the cafeteria encounter, he hoped against hope no one had noticed, or worse yet, inferred anything. After being fairly infamous in junior high, all Iruka wanted was to graduate quietly. Avoiding Kakashi would work best to that end, he decided. For now though, he just wanted to sleep so he could stop thinking for a little bit.

I WILL fall asleep, I WILL fall asleep, I WILL fall asleep!

As he was WILLing himself to sleep, quieter, sneakier parts of his mind gathered to rebel against good sense. He dreamed fitfully of closets and cake and felt less than rested when the barking of his alarm clock heralded a new day.

TBC

ok! This chapter is boring and short i know, my apologies. Lolita is a great book, and though the whole book was not on my high school curriculum, we did read an excerpt of it, so i thought it'd be ok to use, esp for kakashi who I'm sure would be in some sort of AP class equivalent. I have read the whole thing on my own, but there may still be inaccuracies when i refer to it cause that was a while ago. I don't have time to reread good literature and write crappy fanfiction! I'm confident I've made the right choice, lol. i want to be dumber ;p

latin root taken from dictionary dot com

TO THE NICE PEOPLE:

anbu-kakashi: I'm sorry it's another short one, and it's not white day anymore either :( hope i didn't ruin your day ;)

darkwitchling: thanks! personally, I'm jealous. yes, jealous of a cartoon character in a fictional AU scenario that i wrote. who are gay in said fictional scenario. don't look at me.

Xoq: it's not hard, cause really that's my guess for everything ;)

eudoxus: lol, yes cake. though no one thinks of cake more than i do.

R.A. Elric: eheh, that's what i do! In fact, i put kakashi x or iruka x and use the "find" function... it's an accident if i read narusasu or some other pairing.

disama: now there's an idea!

Generally maz: ack, now i want cake AND cookies. drags self to corner grocery

snow887: thanks, I'm glad you think so :)

lightdragon1987: thanks, being too OOC is always a worry...i though iruka would be most angry with kakashi because what he did was more personal. (plus, it's more fun to have one boy be angry with the other isn't it?)

martyr avenue: thanks, iruka will wreak a little havoc too, little hellion that he is.

Anthoula: it's misread.

Xtina: heee, i love sweet but perverted kakashi. and paranoid iruka.

Sodesne: it wasn't all that soon but better late than never, or something :3

suke-san: oh, i love your fics! All of them are excellent. 3

host: actually I've heard of genma-kakashi before from other fics. then again, genma's been with everyone, he's such a ho. augh, sorry for taking so long, I'm just so brain dead these days...

Theinflictedfinger: lol, i drool when people give me cake too! Now if only someone would give me cake when i drool. drools

sunshine pie: thanks! eek, I'm rather helpless against the lazy ass in me...