When Boba left my dream-life began. I spent most of my days in bed, killing time, thinking of him. I was depressed - I wasn't eating much - I didn't have the energy to hunt. If he doesn't care enough to stay with me, I thought, what's the point in living?
So I lived in my dreams. Some were wonderful - warmly lit reunions or snippets from our childhood, before things were complicated. Sometimes it was a combination of the two - we'd be at our present ages, but lounging in the fields of Corinth. In the dreams I couldn't stop touching him - just simple things, a kiss on the cheek or a hand through his thick hair. It felt so real, and the part of me that knew it wasn't wanted to at least savor the façade. Boba would always be smiling, looking into the distance, completely relaxed. No father to avenge, no doomed destiny to inherit.
Of course my heart wasn't the only part of me that missed him - my body did, too, fueling dreams of a different sort. Dreams where he would soar in on his jetpack during the night and take me wearing full armor - strangely these dreams were more lonely to wake from than the ones of a more tender nature.
But by far the most unsettling to wake from alone were the nightmares. In almost all of them, Boba met some horrible fate that I couldn't save him from or warn him about. I always saw it coming and he never did - a silly unreality, to think that the son of a bounty hunter wouldn't sense danger and that a naïve orphan girl would, but my real fear was simply that he was in over his head. Boba was raised by a ferocious and competent warrior, yes, but only for half of his young life. For the second half he was mainly in my company, which may have saved a bit of his soul but was not necessarily good training for battle.
Months passed. My cheeks grew hollow from hunger, and thick strands of my long hair fell out on my pillow. I was malnourished, and had barely been out of the cave since he had left.
It was hard, but somehow I pulled myself out of the cocoon that my bed had become, got dressed and walked to the mouth of the cave. Squinting against the daylight, I held my hand over my face and thought about where I might go - I had to get out of there. I remembered the lagoon I'd found the day before he left, and set out for the long hike, bringing along a canteen full of stream water for the journey.
In the state I was in I could barely make it, and I had to make frequent stops to rest and drink. The water from the canteen was nearly gone before I'd even gone half the distance, and I began to wonder if trying to make the trek with only some ploi ploi fruit and a piece of stale bread in my stomach was such a good idea.
But when I finally made it to the lagoon, my fatigue disappeared. I had forgotten how eerily beautiful it was - like an oasis in the desert. It was still full of fat, rainbow-scaled fish. Hot from the long walk, I slipped out of my clothes, which were more like tents then, and joined the fish in the cool water.
Floating on my back, I looked up at the sky. I let myself fantasize for a moment about seeing the Slave 1 suddenly descending from space, but then stopped myself. I had to stop wishing for Boba to return. Each day it became more and more obvious that he wasn't coming back.
I was afraid he was dead. Another - more selfish - part of me was also afraid that he was alive, and simply didn't want to come back to me.
Knowing I would never be able to understand Boba and his motives, I tried to stop thinking about him. I let myself slip under the clear water, and kept my eyes open so I could see the fish. They swam around me, unafraid.
How easy, the life of a fish, I thought, kicking deeper to see how far down I could go. I could nearly touch the bottom before my ears began to whine in pain and my breath grew short. Turning around, I watched the sun beams that pierced the water as I surfaced - the Geonosian sun, the only one I had ever known. The only star my tiny body had ever orbited. To think that there were other suns in the universe - and millions of planets that circled them - was almost overwhelming. I wondered which sun's rays Boba was walking under at that moment - or was he far from sun, alone and frightened in the cold of night? Or worse - had he become his own star, in death? If I die, I thought, floating idly in the water with the fish sweeping carefree around my ankles, the heavenly body that would suit me would be a planet, orbiting Boba's star-soul. My thoughts had found a way to return to him - I would never be free of him; even in death he would be the center of my world.
I groaned at my own morbid thought process, and pulled myself out of the water. I laid down on my discarded clothing and let the winds that swept down through the canyon cool me as the sun dried my skin. Lying naked and vulnerable in the Geonosian mountains, I felt strangely calm. I rolled on my side and watched the fish. They were still there, of course - fat. Fresh. Tasty?
I was hungry - for the first time in awhile I had a real appetite, not just the human desire to sustain myself with some meager food. My eyes moved to the nearest tree - 'tree' by Geonosian standards meant a dead-looking husk of trunk with spindly branches. I stood and put my shirt and underwear back on, and broke a branch off of the tree - a sharp and strong one, a makeshift spear.
Going back to the water, I looked down at the circling fish. I felt guilty with the branch in my hand - yes, they were just animals, but I wasn't sure I had the right to kill them just because I was higher on the food chain. Of course I couldn't be held accountable for it by law - unless Geonosis had some strange wildlife preservation laws that I didn't know about - but it felt wrong on a different level. On a moral level - hadn't I just been swimming with them? Were we so different?
I sat down by the water's edge, defeated and starving. No attachments, Boba had always muttered when we were in bed together, I'm breaking all of my father's laws. Apparently this was part of some bounty hunter code - that the life of a killer was simpler when he cared for no one. But this was foolishness, and impossible - Jango had cared for Boba, and if his son had been put in danger he would have risked tarnishing his career to help him.
At least I hoped he would have.
Either way, I had grown attached to the fish there in that peaceful place, and it meant that I wasn't going to eat. Maybe Jango was right. My stomach moaned a complaint as I stood to leave, pulling on my skirt - and the 'belt' I'd had to fashion from string just to keep it on - before refilling the canteen from the lagoon.
The walk back was hard - and I hadn't realized how long I'd spent at the lagoon, once again. Darkness swept across the canyon, and the sight of one of my shirts drying on a tree outside our cave was a welcome one.
As I climbed up to the cave, racking my brain for something I could eat, I heard the distant sound of cheers from the Coliseum - an execution night. Inside, I lit candles and began searching every nook and cranny for something to eat. Finally I remembered that Boba had kept some dried meat in a crate by Slave 1 to snack on when he was working on the ship. I hurried to the part of the cave that had served as the 'garage', hoping he hadn't taken it with him.
Luckily, it was still there. I happily whipped off the top of the crate - but when I saw the contents I recoiled. A blaster and a piece of paper - a note - lay on top of the food packages. I picked up the blaster awkwardly and set it aside, going for the note. Something slid off of it when I picked it up - our charge card, that held the records of all of Boba's credits. I put that aside, too, surprised that he'd left it, and read the note.
Calli, it said, I figured you might hit the bottom of the food barrel here before you ventured out to the market - well, here is our card. I made a separate account for myself and took what I needed - the rest is yours. The blaster also - remember everything I taught you, okay? Be careful. Buy a landspeeder in town so you won't have to travel on foot. I don't know how you managed to be sheltered from it as an orphan - I like to think I had a hand in it - but the world is a horrible, dangerous place.
" Oh, Boba," I muttered, sad for him, " It is not." But maybe I was naïve.
Watch out for yourself, was his last sentence before, Yours, Boba.
Yours. Ha. I realized quickly why Boba had secreted these things away and left them with a note instead of giving them to me himself - he didn't want to admit to me when he left that he knew he wouldn't be coming back, that I would have to make preparations to go on by myself.
I sat on the floor with his letter for awhile, re-reading it and munching on the dried meat sticks. They weren't very good - I stood and put some clean clothes on.
I had waited long enough, I decided, the ringing cheers from the Coliseum beckoning in the distance. I was going to town.
I carried a small flashlight I'd found in Boba's old tool box along as I walked toward the growing noise of the arena. I'd never been to the market during a night execution - but I'd heard they were wilder and that the streets were more packed. Working on energy from my first meal complete with protein in awhile, I grew more excited about the atmosphere as I approached - I'd never been out on my own like I was that night, with no Boba waiting at home or matron watching over my shoulder.
The vendor's stands were spread so thickly around the Coliseum that they nearly reached the boulder that shadowed Jango's grave. I stopped there briefly to blow a kiss to Boba's memory. I noticed that the stone that bore his father's name was still brushed free of sand - he must have visited it before he left Geonosis. The whispered promise for revenge still hanging in the air, goosebumps rose on my arms as I walked on.
I walked toward the rumble of Geonosians and outlanders that were crowded around the huge stone structure. From the sound of it, the execution inside its walls was just getting good. The Geonosian equivalents of 'Oooh!' and 'Ahhh!' could be heard in collective gasps amidst the screams and roars of the entertainment. The sounds from the Coliseum usually perturbed me, but I was numbed to it a bit that night.
The market was different in the evening - the food selection was more catered to Geonosian tastes - baskets overflowing with live bugs and larvae. Another difference was the refusal of my card when I tried to buy a drink at one of the stands.
" Cash only on fight night," the vendor barked in Geonosian, and I understood after some contemplation. I guess they can afford to be picky with crowds this size, I thought, as I was pushed aside by the next customer in line.
Another Geonosian in line said something that sounded like 'change money', and gestured to a large stand in the middle of the excitement. It was run by what I was surprised to recognize from one of my old lessons in the species of the outer rim galaxies as a Twi'lek. I got in line and peered like a clueless tourist at the Twi'lek girl as she changed credits and foreign money to Geonosian currency - she was beautiful, much nicer looking than the male counterparts that my science books had featured. She looked sad - as I approached I realized why - she was wearing a thick, steel collar and chain - a slave. As I got closer I saw a fat, three-eyed Malastarian in the back of the tent, arguing with a Geonosian.
" Next," the Twi'lek girl said, and her proud voice surprised me - even with a chain around her neck she held her chin up. But as I stepped up to the counter, I saw the pain that her eyes could not hide.
" May I help you?" she asked in Geonosian when I didn't speak up.
" Yes," I said, " Paper money, please." She giggled.
" You mean," she corrected, " Paper money?" she said, using the proper Geonosian word for 'paper'.
" Oh, yes," I said, embarrassed with my poor knowledge of the language.
" What did I say?"
" Tree," she said, smiling, " Tree money. Close! Human?"
" Yes," I said, wondering how different I looked since I'd lost weight - wasn't it at least obvious that I was human? I suppose I could have been a Clawdite masquerading as one . . .
" Then we can speak in a tongue you are more familiar with," she said, changing to the human language. " It perturbs my master, though," she said with a playful grin, " He doesn't trust humans or their words."
" Well, to hell with him," I said, " I don't believe in slavery and I could care less if he trusts me or not." I handed her my card. " Two-hundred in cash, please."
" That's a lot of money to be carrying around here," she said. " You'll have to be careful - thieves do their best business on the night of a major execution."
" I'll be alright," I said, gesturing to Boba's blaster, which I had at my hip.
" Ah, I see," she said, pulling up my account on her scanner, " That 200 credits is nothing for such a wealthy person."
" How much do I have?" I asked, wondering how long I would be able to go without working.
" Two-hundred and fifty thousand," she said. " My, my. You must come from a prominent family, eh?"
" Not really," I muttered, still in a bit of shock. " Thanks."
I noticed that she was still staring longingly at my blaster. I almost wanted to offer to help her escape, but as she handed me my money and returned my card, the next creature in line elbowed his way past me to the counter. He began speaking quickly in Huttese, Boba's second language that I could still only pick a few words from, and she answered him easily. Smart girl, I thought, walking away. Probably smart enough to escape on her own.
I lazily pushed my way through the crowd, dazed by her answer to my inquiry - two-hundred and fifty thousand - Boba had left me nearly everything. What did he think I needed all of that money for? Did he feel he owed it to me? It was terrifying on two levels - one, because it meant he probably planned on 'working' for future income, most likely in his father's trade. And secondly, because it meant that I could go anywhere I wanted, have anything I wanted. I wouldn't even know where to begin - travelling alone in space was almost too much to imagine. Rich or poor, I was still stuck in the past because of my own cowardice.
" And I wanted to be in the army," I muttered, scoffing at myself. I looked up and saw ships landing in a sort of parking area back behind the Coliseum. I noticed a tent near the landing pad where money seemed to be changing hands, and headed in that direction.
When I reached the tent, I saw a mass of ship parts for sale inside, and a sign in Geonosian - 'We Service Your Craft While You Watch the Fight! Guaranteed to be ready by the time the last criminal is splattered!' There was a notation after their slogan and a legal disclaimer in tiny print at the bottom of the ad - 'Owners are not actually responsible for meeting the deadline of the last criminal executed …' or something along those lines. The manager, an older Geonosian, saw me reading the fine print and hurried over.
" Hey, hey," he said in his best attempt at joviality. " You need something worked on?" I couldn't help guffawing a bit under my breath - sounded like a bad pick up line, but then, maybe I was translating incorrectly . . .
" Actually," I said, nervous about making a large business transaction with my limited language skills, " I was looking for a speeder for sale and thought maybe you could help me." The Geonosian rubbed his chin thoughtfully, pulling long strands of beard through his fingers.
" I don't have anything here," he told me, " But my son might have one he wants to get rid of. His stand is on the other side of the arena - he's selling cameras."
" Thank you," I said, hurrying off to find the stand. As I was walking I noticed a handful of humans - not a common site on Geonosis. A lonely place inside me made me almost want to stop them and strike up a conversation - but most were gruff looking men who didn't seem like they'd take kindly to a stranger's advance, human or not. Finally I found the camera stand - the young Geonosian who sat at its counter was sleeping, his - female, I guessed - companion was left watching the counter.
" Hello," she said as I approached. " How may I help you?"
" I was told by a mechanic on the other side of the arena that you might have a speeder for sale?" I said. She frowned, and nudged her sleeping partner.
" Selling our speeder?" I caught in fast-tongued Geonosian. The male grumbled and rubbed his eyes.
" Who's asking?" he said, glancing up at me. " She doesn't have any money," he muttered, taking a look at my worn clothes and starved appearance.
" I've got plenty of money," I said, " Cash, too." I flashed him a quick glance at the bundle of bills in my pocket. His eyes widened a bit.
" Well," he said, " Its an old model, but she still runs okay. I could let her go for maybe 500."
" I've only got 200," I said. The female made a disapproving noise. The male's eyes shifted thoughtfully.
" Two hundred would be robbery," he said, frowning. The woman voiced her agreement.
" Its all I've got," I lied - well, it wasn't entirely a lie. It was all I had, in cash. I saw him considering it - I knew it would be hard to sell a landspeeder to another Geonosian unless, like its present owner, he was very lazy - given the fact that they had wings. Since humans were the main demographic for landspeeders, I knew he might see this as a rare opportunity, and therefore sell low.
His female counterpart, meanwhile, was upset about the idea of selling at that price - he was arguing that he needed money because of gambling debts or something . . . their voices spiked and became hard to understand. Eventually the girl disappeared in a huff into the back of the tent, and he agreed to sell it.
The landspeeder was not in top condition - I wouldn't have gotten it for that price if it was, no matter how badly he needed the money. It was rusted, and the engine sounded irritated when we started it. Its former owner showed me the controls, and how to work them.
" Have you flown anything before?" he asked.
" Yes, a starship," I said pridefully, " I think I can handle this." He rolled his eyes. " By the way," I said, checking the fuel level and systems analysis - the technology was ancient and I could barely make out the symbols on the tiny screen, as the viewer was filthy. " Do you know of any place on Geonosis where humans have settled, or where they congregate when they're on the planet?"
He made a face. " Geonosians not good enough for you, eh?"
" Oh, its not that -" I tried to explain, but he waved me off with a scoff.
" A good ways south of here," he said, " There is a village where some humans once settled. It is mostly a ghost town now, but smugglers and bounty hunters can be found in its bars." My ears perked up at the words 'bounty hunters', and before he could continue, I sped off.
The ride through the night was pitch dark and rather nervousing, but I had Boba's blaster in my lap and the stars overhead to keep me company. My heart rate had increased since I'd heard the Geonosian's words: bounty hunters can be found there. I knew I wouldn't find Boba, but there might be some information there that could put my fears about him to rest.
For better or worse. I wasn't sure I wanted to know - but I couldn't turn away from a chance to find out.
I wondered as I saw the lights of the human city ahead if this was where Boba had killed the man he stole the keycard from. And I wondered if that key had brought him everything he hoped for - I doubted it. I knew that subconsciously he hoped it would return his father to him, but of course, no amount of revenge can raise the dead.
I parked my speeder outside of the first tavern I found - it was unmarked, but a welcoming glow came from inside, and through its windows I could see people eating. My stomach growled in applause - I was still starving.
Pushing my way inside, I got more than a few looks - I wasn't the only woman in the tavern by far - several of the men had crowds of pretty girls, both human and alien, at their shoulders. But I looked like a vagabond - especially with the antique vehicle I had pulled up in.
" Hey," the creature who was running the bar called, " We don't give hand outs here." For a moment I thought she was a Geonosian, and then I realized - she was Gragarian, a small, winged creature from Tatooine.
" I've got money," I said, uncomfortable, as everyone in the bar was staring at me. I walked to the counter and looked at the limited menu - there was nothing fancy for sale, but it all sounded good to me. " I'll have the stew," I said, " And a yucca meat pie, some wattu sticks, and one of those sweet bread muffins." I handed her my card, and she glared at me, still skeptical. " A drink, too," I said, " Jawa Juice, please."
" We only serve hard drinks here," she snorted, pulling up my account. I saw the look of surprise on her face when she read her scanner. " Where does someone who looks like you get all this money, huh?" she asked, suspicious.
" My husband is a famous criminal," I lied, " A thief."
" Oh yeah?" the Gragarian said, running my card through her register " Have I heard of him?"
" Yes," I said, " But I'd rather not give him away." She made an annoyed face and handed back my card. I turned and found a table, and eventually the clientele got tired of looking at the new stranger and returned to their drinks and cavorting. I had intentionally sat near a table of men and various creatures who were heavily armed and surrounded by women - bounty hunters, surely. Waiting for my food, I sat back and listened to their conversation. Some were speaking in Huttese, but the humans, at least, were speaking my language.
" Hey, Karmac," one of the girls was saying, hanging on the shoulders of a heavy-set man with short hair and mini rocket launchers strapped to his elbows. " Tell them about your latest client."
Karmac laughed. " I shouldn't brag . . ." he said.
" Come on," a reddish-colored being who reminded me of the fish I'd been swimming with earlier said in an awkward accent, " Who was it?"
" Luna Organa," I heard Karmac answer, and everyone at the table squealed or groaned. I had never heard of her - Organa was a name that sounded vaguely royal, though. The waitress brought my food to the table.
" Here you go, doll," she said, putting my four plates down, " And some hard stuff, on the house." She set down a small glass full of an amber liquid. " I think Eulee feels kind of bad for teasing you - now that she knows you've got money," she said with a wink.
" Thanks," I said, returning to my eavesdropping as I started in on my dinner.
" Luna Organa," one of the other men was saying, shaking his head and grinning, " Damn fine looking woman, but not worth the trouble. The girl is downright wicked."
" She put a bounty on her ex-lover's head," Karmac said, obviously relishing the fact that he had a good story to tell, " Apparently some guy broke her heart -"
" Ooooh," several of the girls cooed, wincing.
" That takes balls," another man mumbled.
" So she asked me to bring her his," Karmac said, grinning so hugely that I could hear it in his words, " No body required." Another chorus of approving 'Ohh!'s.
" Now, this was pretty nasty work - removing a particular organ for bounty," Karmac said, " But well worth the 150,000 credits she paid." He sat back proudly. I made a disgusted face into my stew and tried not to loose my appetite - was this the kind of work Boba's father raised him around? Was this what Boba was doing now? Catering to the rich and twisted's every whim?
" So how did you - deliver it?" one of the girls asked cautiously.
" We met in a cantina in the slums of Alderran," Karmac said, " She asked where it was, and I tossed it on the table." The girls made a collective disgusted sound and the men chuckled. " She sort of stared at it for a few minutes, real stoic-like, and then said, 'Oh, its not beating. I'd rather wanted to crush it myself.' And I told her she hadn't specified for a 'beating' heart. She said 'fair enough', gave me the money and pocketed the thing."
" Eyech," a pure-white woman with long, orange hair said, raising her shoulders, " What a freak!"
" Damn fine woman, though," the man to Karmac's right said again, puffing on a death stick.
" I'd have forfeited the credits and asked to spend a night with her as payment," a squirrelly man on the other side of the table said, sparking laughter, a few 'yeah right's and a 'she'd have kicked your ass'.
" Hey, don't act like its impossible," Karmac said, " You know she has a weakness for our kind."
" What do you mean?" the fish-like man said, " The guy you offed for her was a bounty hunter?"
" No, no," Karmac said, " But when she first hired me, she was real curious about Boba."
I nearly whirled around in my seat, but stopped myself before I could. My heart raged at the sound of his name - I didn't think I'd get lucky enough to hear him discussed on the first night I came to the bar.
" Who the hell is Boba?" the squirrelly man asked, and a few of the other hunters made insulted noises.
" What are you, some kinda idiot, Pewa?" one of the girls asked, " You never heard of Jango Fett's son?"
" The hell," Pewa said, making a face. " I didn't know he had a son. I thought Jango was famous for never taking up with women?"
" He ain't no woman's son," the man on Karmac's right said, " I heard he's a clone. And now that he's growe'd up he's like Jango back from the dead."
" Well, shit," Pewa muttered, " That means business is about to take a dive for all of us. I never got any big jobs while Jango was alive."
" None of us did," Karmac said, " He was like a god. And now Boba's picking up where he left off - I saw him on Corasaunt when I was tracking Organa's bounty. Scared the hell out of me, too - thought I was having some sort of vision. He was wearing Jango's old armor and everything."
" So what was Luna asking about him?" the red-haired girl asked.
" Just if he was working, at first," Karmac said, " 'Course I told her no, cause I knew she'd hire him over me in a second. Then she'd just sort of ask how he'd turned out, where he was hanging around these days, stuff like that. I was thinking about why she might have an interest in him beyond his hunting skills, and then I remembered - a political adversary of her father's hired Jango to kidnap her for a while when she was real young, so he could waive some movement Bail was planning in the Senate. Jango always had Boba with him back then - I bet they knew each other when they were kids."
This more than the story about tossing the heart on the table made my appetite snap away. Some beautiful, dangerous princess had her eye on Boba - and a history with him, too, which hurt me even more. It had never occurred to me that it might be a more exciting woman, rather than just a more exciting lifestyle, that he would abandon me for. Again, this was before I'd come to terms with the curiosity that was Boba and women. I was crushed, I couldn't move in my seat. I kept my ears open - the girls at the table were chiming in their approval.
" I can hardly blame her for asking about him," one said, " I hear he's gorgeous, and if he's anything like his father was in that armor - deadly, too."
" Ah, beautiful, deadly - and with daddy's chip on his shoulder," the red-haired girl said, bending teasingly toward Karmac's ear. " Sounds hot!"
" Yeah, pretty soon all our groupies will be relocating to Corasaunt," Karmac said, grinning at her.
" What's he doing on Corasaunt?" a gruff-voiced hunter asked. " Hunting someone?"
" I guess so," Karmac said with a shrug. " He wouldn't go into detail about it. You know those Fetts - they keep to themselves. Polite, but not friendly."
Having to blink back tears, I realized I couldn't listen anymore - I hadn't excepted news of Boba being alive and well on Corasaunt to hurt me so badly. I grabbed the drink the waitress had brought and threw it back in one gulp - it tasted nothing like the wine Boba and I used to drink - it burned all the way down and made me wince. I searched my pockets and found a few coins to throw onto the table for the waitress, stuffed my uneaten wattu sticks and muffin into my napkin and left in a blind streak as the tears began to fall.
" Come again!" Eulee, the Gragarian behind the counter shouted as I pushed my way out.
Although I knew coming back would only torment me further, I also knew that I would not be able to resist. If I could not be with him, I could at least become a connessior of gossip, a collector of stories. Even if each detail of his life without me was another needle to my heart, it was better than nothing. Hearing about him from strangers made me sad - more evidence that he didn't belong entirely, or maybe at all, to me - but it also made me feel less alone.
I wasn't the only one who loved him, after all. The men loved him as a legend and a hero to their profession - in those early years mostly as the memory of his father, their former colleuge - and the women, well, they loved him because he was exciting - fun but scary, beautiful but horrible.
I was simply the only one for whom love for him brought great pain.
The night wind blew my moist eyes dry, and I began to wish for some goggles as I rode back toward the Coliseum. Every now and then I would hear an animal noise to the left or right, out of sight of my speeder's headlights, and would fire a blaster shot into the sky to scare the creature away. Meanwhile the headlights did catch the glowing eyes of lizards and small rodents, who would hiss at me as I flew past.
I prayed the speeder would make it home without a hitch - it wasn't the smoothest ride I'd ever had by far, which worried me - and that when I did get home I would be able to draw on Boba's lessons in ship maintenance and the tools he'd left behind well enough to service it a bit.
It was late by the time I reached the Coliseum, and the execution was long over, the crowds dispersed into only a few stragglers, and the vendors packing up their goods. As I rode through I heard a scream, and looked ahead to find its origin - I noticed the tent where I'd had my money changed, and flew toward it, remembering the kind Twi'lek girl who had given me a lesson in Geonosian vocabulary.
Driving slowly past the tent, I saw the Malastarian inside screaming at the Twi'lek girl in a language I didn't understand - she kept apologetically repeating the same word - both were pointing at stacked piles of money on the counter. I saw that the slave girl had tears in her eyes, and I realized why when I saw her master raise a whip as if to strike her. She cowered.
I'm not quite sure where the courage for what I did next came from - maybe it was because of the liqueur I'd downed quickly before I left the tavern. Without thinking, I grabbed the blaster from my lap and fired - a crack shot thanks to all of the practicing Boba had made me do, it blew the whip in half in mid-crack. Stunned, the Malastarian dropped the weapon and jerked his eyes up to see who had fired.
Oh, I thought. Shit.
Not exactly prepared for a stand-off, especially in my clunky speeder, my brain leapt into a frenzied, immobile panic when he reached under the counter and retrieved a rifle. Before he could fire, the Twi'lek jumped up and grabbed the gun, trying to wrestle it from him. But with her chains restraining her, he easily knocked her away.
He lifted the gun again, but this time I was ready - my shock had melted away and my adrenaline had kicked in. I stomped on the accelerator and my speeder shot around toward the back of the tent. He fired several shots, one that grazed the back of my craft and sent it into a shaky descent.
" No!" I said, yanking up on the controls. I was able to pull it up before it hit the ground, but now the Malastarian had leapt over the counter and was running toward me with his weapon raised. I abandoned the speeder and rolled behind the tent. The Twi'lek stuck her head out from under the back flap and grinned at me.
" I knew when I saw you that you would help me!" she said, smiling and seemingly unmoved by what was going on. " You are my Menishkia, sent by our gods to rescue me, yes?"
" Sure," I said, firing around the side of the tent at the Malastarian, who had the nerve to be using my speeder as cover.
" My chains!" she said, holding out the thick leash around her neck. I ducked behind the tent and fired on the metal-link leash that was attaching her to a pole inside the tent, and she crawled out, still wearing the thick collar but now free to move about.
In the time it took to free her, the Malastarian had moved closer and his aim was getting better - a bullet from his rifle whizzed past my ear - or I thought, at first, that it passed. It took a few seconds for the pain to register, but I soon realized that it had skimmed the top of my ear - blood leaked down the side of my face.
" Agrh!" I groaned, falling back against the tent.
" The authorities have been called!" the Twi'lek said, " We should get out of here!" I peeked back around the tent and saw some Geonosians in important-looking regalia running toward the Malastarian - he had dropped his weapon and was trying to explain, in Geonosian that was even poorer than mine, that I had started the fight.
I suppose this was true - I had fired first, no matter that he had committed the first dastardly act by beating his slave. My instincts were telling me to run, but I didn't want to leave my speeder.
" I need that vehicle," I told the Twi'lek, " I can't make it back in the dark without it, or at least the flashlight I left in it."
She bit her lip for a moment. " Alright," she said, " Let me handle this." She took my arm and led me toward the security guards and the Malastarian, who was now pointing wildly at me and verbally flailing to accuse me in Geonosian. The guards scratched their heads and asked him to please repeat himself.
The Twi'lek stepped forward and began calmly explaining the situation to the guards - she was perfectly composed, and her Geonosian was flawless. I heard her say that she was my slave, and that the Malastarian gentleman had been trying to steal her from me for 'sexual purposes'. The guards gave the Malastarian, who could scarcely understand her and therefore didn't protest, a disgusted look. Not only did they loathe foreigners who caused trouble, as a culture they were strictly against inter-species mating.
As they tried to place handcuffs on the Malastarian he became furious again, and while they struggled to restrain him, the Twi'lek and I slipped into the speeder and began gliding away. The guards shouted a protest - they wanted to question us further.
" Floor it," the Twi'lek said, " That story won't hold up if they check my registration."
" I don't know if running from the guards is such a good idea," I said. " They'll follow us. If we run they'll know we're up to something."
" Hey, come'on," she said, leaning toward me and grinning. " Live a little."
I pressed my lips together and looked behind me - guards on speeders that were much sleeker than mine were pulling up to the scene, and, it seemed, preparing to follow us. But what would the impetuous Luna Organa do? I thought, steeling myself. Maybe I could be wild, too - I had started a gun fight . . .
I pressed my foot to the accelerator, and we soared off. The Twi'lek girl whooped happily - sure, she was happy, she was getting a free hand in escaping - but I had to live on Geonosis, and I wasn't thrilled at the idea of being a wanted woman. But the deed was already done - we were speeding toward the mountains -and the guards were on our tail.
I pulled the blaster off my hip again and tossed it to the Twi'lek.
" Can you shoot?" I asked. She made a face that didn't exactly convince me that she was a gunslinger.
" I can try," she said.
" No, you grab the controls," I said, and just then blaster shots from behind began zipping by us. " I'll try to put their ship down," I said, ducking down and turning when she grabbed the controls.
I fired but didn't get anywhere close - she was flying the ship too erratically, and my shots were bouncing in a way I couldn't account for in my aim. Suddenly a blaster shot hit dead on - straight into my companion's neck.
" Noo!" I screamed, not only because she was hurt, but also because she let go of the controls and we began heading straight for a canyon wall. I dropped the blaster and grabbed the controls, pulling up drastically, praying we could miss the wall. We soared straight up, bumping the top of the rock but otherwise making it away unscathed. By the time the guard's headlights spotted the wall it was too late, and I heard the explosion behind me as they smashed into the rock. The light from the blast revealed that my home was just up ahead - I saw that same telltale shirt drying in the tree.
" Whatta ya know," my companion suddenly said, sitting up, and I gasped.
" Oh!" I said, still shaking from the pressure of my heart ripping wildly about in my chest. " I thought you were dead!"
" Thick steel," she said, grinning and pulling off her collar, which had been melted by the laser's blast. She groaned, " It burned my skin a bit, though," she said, wincing as a red spot on her neck grew brighter.
" I might have something in my - er - cave that could help you," I said, " My ear needs attention, too." I thought of the first aid kid Boba had kept on Slave 1 - was it still there? I had taken it out to bandage his arm just before he left - I didn't remember putting it back, and it didn't seem like something he would pay attention to himself. It would be beneficial to us, of course, if it was still there - but it made me nervous that Boba might be out there on his quest without any medicinal supplies . . .
I shook my head at myself for thinking of Boba at a time like that, and landed the speeder inside the cave; it made a deadened whirring sound before it shut off, worrying me further.
" I am sorry to involve you in this," the Twi'lek girl said, " But I promise that you will be well rewarded for it." She climbed out of the speeder with her hand pressed to her throat, and despite her pain she smiled, " My name is Ipa, and I am a Grand Duchess on the planet Ryloth, my home," she told me. " I was kidnapped by that Malastarian who enslaved me. For more than six months I didn't know what I could do - there were opportunities where I could tell someone who I was and what had happened to me, but I knew it would anger my people so that they would blame the Malastarians as a whole. Tensions between our two worlds have always been high, and I didn't want to start a war over the actions of one man, and all because of my own carelessness."
" Your carelessness?" I said, going toward the bed and searching for the first aid kit - I found it on the floor, left open, just as it was before Boba left. I pushed away my sorrow when I saw the length of bandage I'd snipped from his wrapped wound, and searched for some sort of salve to soothe Ipa's burn and possibly stop my ear from throbbing in an obnoxious pain.
" Yes," she said with a sigh, accepting a bottle of vitamin-enhanced cream for her burn. " I was always skeptical about my father's obsession with security," she explained. " I was proud and foolish - often traipsing off on little excursions around the property by myself, just to spite my father's worries. On one of these journeys, I didn't return - the Malastarian caught me and put me in chains."
" That's horrible," I said, carefully applying some solution to my ear. My nerves jerked in pain, and I winced.
" I'm so sorry that you were injured because of me," she said, nursing her own wounds with the cream. " As I said, you will be handsomely rewarded. But you haven't even told me your name yet."
" Callia Antillies," I said, " Calli. And don't worry about it. I'm glad I could help you."
" Antillies," she said, smiling, " That's a fine name."
" Is it?" I muttered, trying in vain to attach a bandage to the tip of my ear. " I wouldn't know." She frowned.
" What do you mean?" she asked, " Are you a lost child like me?"
" Not lost," I said, giving up on the bandage and just pulling my hair back away from my cut, " But definitely not noble. I was - am - an orphan. My mother was a penniless woman who'd been abandoned while pregnant - she went to the orphanage where I was born and raised for help. She was very weak when she arrived, nearly dead. But she managed to gave birth to me there, and died from complications during labor."
" How horrible," Ipa said, " I'm sorry to hear this. But you say her name was Antillies?"
" Yes," I said, " Its all I know about her - her name. Callia Elbe Antillies - my name, too. The matrons at the orphanage named me after her." I shrugged. " As it turns out, I am a lonely wanderer, just as she was."
" But you are not sick," Ipa reminded me, " And not penniless," she added, with a twinkle in her eye. " Why do you live here in this cave?" she asked, looking around. " Surely you could afford a proper place to live on - a more friendly planet."
" I guess you could say I'm waiting here for someone," I muttered, sitting down beside the hearth Boba and I had fashioned out of stones and making a pile of kindling for a fire. " Probably in vain," I added.
" Someone?" she said, " Who would meet you here?"
" My -" I searched for a word that would describe my relationship with Boba. " A man," I said, " A man I love."
" Ahhh," she said in the obnoxious tone of someone who has decided that their companion is just another fool for misplaced love. " I see."
" It's a long story," I said, not wanting her to think I was like every other woman who waited hopelessly for a man to change, to settle down, whatever. " Its complicated," I added, sounding even more pathetic.
" I have never been in love," she said, watching as I blew on the fire. As it roared to life I walked to our kitchen area and fetched the kettle I'd bought long ago at the market, and some old tea bags that I'd had for awhile.
" Do you want some tea?" I asked her, and she nodded enthusiastically.
" I haven't had anything good to eat or drink in months," she told me, " How I'll enjoy my homecoming feast on Ryloth when I return!" she said, grinning and rubbing her hands together. I felt jealous of her for a moment - she had a home, someplace where people would be waiting longingly to see her again.
" If you look on the floor of the speeder," I said, " You'll find some cold wattu sticks and a muffin. I'm afraid that's all I can offer you right now." She hopped up and went to the speeder to retrieve the food, and I followed to fill the kettle at the stream.
" What will you tell them?" I asked as we both made our way back to the fire, she munching on my sweet bread muffin. " When you get home? If you don't want to start a war with Malastare, that is."
" I don't know," she said with a mouthful. " Perhaps I'll say I eloped and that the marriage failed." She grinned. We sat down together and watched the kettle heat over the fire.
" You're lucky you've never really been in love," I told her. " It is the worst thing that ever happened to me." She laughed.
" You can tell me I don't know what I'm talking about if you like," she said,
" But is it possible that love has treated you badly simply because you've fallen for the wrong man?"
" Hmm," I said, pretending to consider. " You don't know what you're talking about."
" Ah," she said with a smile, " So I thought. Are you expecting him to return any time now?" she asked. " Will he take kindly to a renegade duchess stealing his bride's attention?"
" I'm no bride," I said with a scoff, " And to be truthful, I'm expecting him less and less as the days pass - he's been gone for several months now."
" Oh dear," she said, as the kettle began to whistle and I removed it from the fire. " You're afraid he won't come back at all?"
" I don't know," I said, pouring both of us a cup of water and dropping a tea bag into each. " Part of me knows he'll return to me. Another part thinks the first is a naïve little girl who has overestimated the first boy she ever loved."
Ipa laughed. " You know," she said, " We could be friends. Because you saved my life, you are forever my sister - you know that? But I also think we could be friends."
" Sure," I said, perking up a bit, " I could use a friend, I guess."
" I must return to Ryloth tomorrow," she said, " Would you be interested in a job as my personal pilot? If you bought a ship for us to travel in, my father would surely reimburse you - and then some, when I tell him what you did for me."
" But you can't tell him, remember?" I said, my heart racing in a resistant fear as I imagined piloting a ship through space on my own - sure, I had practiced, but there was no way I was ready for that. " You can't tell him about the Malastarian, so you can't tell him about me."
" Oh, I'll make something up," she said, waving her hand, " We'll say you saved me from my abusive former husband. Or something - either way, he'll know that we are in great debt to you, my sister, my Menishkia."
" Menishkia," I repeated, " You said that before - what does it mean?"
" A Menishkia means guardian angel," she said, " In our language. How I long to speak it again!"
" You're quite a linguist," I said, " Your quick thinking in Geonosian saved us back there, more so than my blaster did."
She clucked her tounge. " Don't be modest," she said, " But I suppose it helped - who knew that paying attention to my language tutors would someday save my life?"
We finished our tea, and I thought about her proposal. I wasn't confident about flying, that was for sure. But if I really wanted to, I had enough money to hire a pilot to fly us both to Ryloth . . . the very thought of leaving seemed impossible, though. What if Boba came back and I wasn't there?
" I'm going to go to sleep," I said, " I can make you a sort of sleeping bag here on the carpet, with some of these blankets-"
" Oh, I couldn't sleep," she said, smiling, " I'm too happy, but also nervous - I'd like to sit up with the fire and stand guard, if that's alright."
" Okay," I said, " My blaster is in the speeder, if you need it." I couldn't believe I was trusting this stranger to sit with a weapon in the cave while I slept - but I believed that I had good instincts about people, and Ipa would not disprove this theory.
I liked to think that these instincts would eventually prove me right about Boba, too. I had a strange dream about him that night - I was packing to leave for Malastare with Ipa and two of the girls I'd seen at the tavern that night, when all of a sudden Boba flew in on my speeder, wearing his armor and begging me not to go.
In the dream, I was smug and unconcerned with his feelings. I grinned and told him that if he would take his helmet off for me, I would stay with him. He tried and tried to pull it off, but it was stuck.
" I can't," he said, giving up, " I can't take it off."
" Then I guess I must go," I said. But suddenly the other girls were gone, and Boba and I were alone in the cave. The dream continued, but I never left. I made dinner, drew him a bath and put him to bed. All while he was wearing his armor - I never got to see his face. After awhile he stopped talking, and as he lay still in our bed I wondered before I woke if there was anything inside the shell anymore.
I woke in the morning to the sound of a hearth fire and the smell of meat roasting. In the moments before I'd truly regained consciousness, my senses leaped in joy - Boba must be home! Then I remembered the night before, and my Twi'lek houseguest. I opened my eyes to see Ipa humming to herself as she turned a canyon hare over the spit.
" Hey, you made breakfast," I said, sitting and pulling myself out of bed.
She smiled. " I guess my skills with a blaster are better than I remembered," she said, " I haven't fired a weapon in ages - but I suppose its not a skill that you can forget."
I wrapped a blanket around my shoulders and sat by the fire while she finished cooking.
" You don't look like you eat much," she said, remarking on my weight. I sighed and wondered how close I'd come to wasting completely away - I hadn't met a single person in town the night before who hadn't made a judgement about me based on my bony limbs and hollow cheeks. " I don't understand - are you saving all of that money for something?"
" No," I said, " I haven't got a single plan, for the money or myself. You might say that I haven't exactly been motivated to eat lately."
Ipa said nothing for a moment, but I could see that she was concerned for her 'Menishkia'.
" Have you thought about my offer?" she asked. " If you don't want a job working for us, you could simply come to Ryloth with me as a friend. We'll make sure you get your fill to eat, yes?"
I thought about it - Ipa returning home to a kingdom full of Twi'leks, and a skinny little human tagging bashfully along with her. I wouldn't fit in at all, just as I wouldn't on any other planet, in any other place. What was the point in trying? I had come from nowhere, and I had nowhere to go.
" I'm sorry," I said, accepting a plate of food and a cup of tea from her, " I can't leave. You can think me a fool if you want, but I have to wait for him."
She seemed to want to argue with me, but she just nodded her head sadly.
" If you will give me a ride into the space port, then, I will go home," she said, " But I will not forget you, or what you have done for me. On each holy day I will ask the oracle in our sanctuary when I should return to you with your reward. It will tell me when you need it most."
I didn't believe any of this religious nonsense, but I smiled as if I did.
Ipa and I climbed into my speeder, and I was more than relieved when it roared to life. We had both fashioned hooded cloaks out of blankets, and we pulled the hoods over our heads as we approached the Imperial capitol, just in case we were recognized by any guards.
" Will you be able to travel safely?" I asked after we bought her a ticket on a commercial ship headed for Ryloth.
" I'll be fine," she said, embracing me in the crowded space port. " Know that you have a friend on Ryloth, should you ever need a place to stay." She stepped back, and I saw her smile and the girlish twinkle in her eyes beneath her hood. " I will see you again, my sister," she said, before disappearing into the crowd.
After Ipa left, I felt lonely, but also relieved - I had grown used to being alone - alone with my thoughts of Boba, with no friends full of good intentions to tell me that I was destroying myself.
But I decided that enough was enough when it came to fasting and lying about in bed all day. I was going to start taking care of myself, eating regularly, swimming every day in the lagoon and travelling each night to the tavern.
I promised myself that I would do the same thing Boba had done while he spent time with me on Geonosis - I would make myself strong.
Keeping my hood pulled close around my face, I headed for the market. I left my speeder in a repair garage while I shopped for a week's worth of food - the crowd was entirely Geonosian that day, no humans or other creatures in sight. I thought about the Tavern with feelings of both anticipation and dread, the human faces there both welcoming and aggravating. Their stories about Boba both comforting and gut-wrenching.
When my speeder had been fully serviced - and I, I felt, overcharged - I headed home. As I rode back amongst the sterile landscape, two thoughts crossed my mind - both felt like a delayed reaction to the events of the night before.
The first was of the two guards who had been pursuing us - I wondered if they had died when their vehicle crashed into the canyon wall. It was likely - they had been following us at a very high speed, and the blast when they struck had sounded deadly. But they were Geonosians - it was possible that they would have reacted quickly enough to at least abandon the vehicle and fly safely off. If this was true, though, wouldn't they have followed us? Perhaps it was too dark, I thought. I went over the event countless times in my head - had they died, or hadn't they? And if they had - wasn't I responsible?
Had I killed two innocent security guards who were only trying to do their job? It was a far different thing than shooting at the Malastarian - I still would have been shaken if I'd hit him, but I'd have felt much less bothered if I'd killed a kidnapper who had enslaved and beaten a girl. The guards, though - they had done nothing wrong. They didn't understand the situation fully, didn't know that I was saving a Rylothian duchess from her abductor - I hadn't even known this myself until Ipa and I returned to the cave.
My hands were shaking by the time I landed in the speeder - was I no different than Boba, killing to get what I wanted, or what I thought was right? What I thought was justice?
The other thing that was bothering me was the way Ipa had reacted when I told her my name was Antilles - she'd said it was a 'fine name'. I had brushed this off as an idle compliment, but she'd asked a second time if my mother's name was Antilles, and, in hindsight, she'd seemed like she was on the verge of revealing something about the name before the subject changed.
I told myself that it couldn't be too important, if she'd let the conversation so easily shift in another direction. And anyway, whoever the Antilles were, my mother had certainly been an outcast - otherwise, why would she have gone to an orphanage for help rather than her 'fine' family?
Whatever the name Antilles meant on Ryloth or in the rest of the galaxy, to me it was only the name of a ghost.