Author: Daisy
Rating: PG although some parts might be rated higher.
Summary: This is Draco's story. It has no clear beginning and it has not clear end. Each chapter is another part of his history. Each part details his journey through the darkness that each person holds inside.
Disclaimer: I hold no authority over any of J.K Rowling's books. I most definitely do not own any of the Harry Potter books.
Author's notes: This will (eventually) be slash. If you don't like that sort of thing perhaps it would best not to get attached to this story!
Into The Darkness
Chapter 2
People often view the world as a place to make fairyland come to life. They believe that one day, the knight in shining armour or the prince charming will come and rescue them. The world loves to believe that each life ends in a fairytale 'happily ever after' ending. How can anything end happily when there is death at the end of each path and sorrow down each road? Both come to all, whether or not people are willing to except it is another matter. What really is important is that you learn to deal with it. There are no happy conclusions. Humans were not created to enjoy life. If they were, they sure don't seem to regard this with adequate care. Therefore, the world turns to a whole new and different belief. Families hope that one day everything will work out for them. The truth of the matter is life can not be a fairy tale for it is too cruel to its residents.
After saying all that, it is going to be rather difficult to explain my life at Hogwarts Academy of Witchcraft. This section of my life will take more time. It one of the more important factors in the later years, as it explains why I did what I did. I am not saying that I hated my time at Hogwarts: no it is quite the contrary. The first six years at Hogwarts were quite pleasant. The last year was… well, different.
It began on the first train ride to the school. I finally met other kids who could relate to me. They were not being forced to play with me or be nice. In the crowd of people surrounding the train station, one person stuck out. His name was Harry Potter. I guess it was his famous scar that caught my attention. I do not mean to say that he was cute because he was not. He was almost as pale as I was and I take great pride in being very pale. Harry Potter was all skin and bones. He really was not much to look at back then. Somehow, he managed to snag my attention though. After that, I could never really let go of him. Oh sure, I can say hated him, but in reality I was just like the rest, I wanted him. I do not take delight in that childish gesture but I learned from my mistakes.
I am sorry to say that although he snagged my attention, I did not appeal to him. The meeting I had planned did not complete its predestined path. Everything seemed to go down hill from there. To be blunt, it was a complete disaster. Everything I planned to say became stuck in my throat and everything I hated came out. One of the Weasley kids had beat me to him first. From our first meeting, I established a name for myself. It was not the name I was looking for. To the school, I became known as Draco Malfoy, most hated enemy of Harry Potter. Yes enemy! I guess no one remembered to ask me what I thought. From then on I was forced to play the part because no one would believe me otherwise.
I did make some good out of this bad luck. For that year and the next four years, I tormented him and his friends. I did everything to make him hate me. In that first encounter with Harry, I realized my father's plans. He was going to use anybody who was near to Potter to hurt the poor boy. I am not usually one for sympathy but somehow that seemed to take it too far. I could not make myself destroy the wizarding world's one chance at surviving. Therefore, I made the famous Boy-Who-Lived hate me for all he was worth. I doubt anyone ever caught on to my plan. I think Dumbledore, the headmaster at that time, suspected something but he never figured it out.
Unfortunately, I was such a good actor; even I began to believe I hated Harry. I had learned from my parents since I could first walk and talk. If I could convince myself that I hated the Boy-Who-Lived, no one would ever be able to figure it out. I think there is just one person in my entire life that could tell when I was lying and that person is dead now. I will explain this person later but for now just thinking of a helping spirit in place of 'my clairvoyant'. I guess that means no one will ever know my secret.
Harry risked his life year after year and I was forced to stand in the background and watch. Without admitting it to myself I worried and I cringed whenever he left. I would never admit that I was glad to see him but I slept better knowing that he was still there to save me when I finally let myself be saved. I think part of me recognized that he was the only one who could save me from myself. I got caught up in the whole saviour thing and thought the gods hated me but my opinion has hardly counted for anything.
After fifth year, I began to notice how everyone seemed to look to me for guidance. I do not mean all of Hogwarts, I mean my housemates. They were following my lead. If I hated one individual they did too. I let the power go to my head. I began to become the selfish brat I never wanted to be. I tormented all those weaker than me and worshipped all who were stronger and I looked forward to the day where all of the world would look up to me. I thought I could guide those fools. The one thing I forgot was that I too was a fool and I needed to be led just as much as the next one. In fact now that I look back on it I can see that I needed to be led more then anyone. The problem with that was that I was the leader and I had no idea how to lead, which meant that other powers saw me as perfect. I guess I mean perfect in the sense that they could manipulate me and if something were to go wrong well, I know who everyone else points fingers at.
Then, near the end of the fifth year I decided it was time to stop acting like a spoiled rich kid and act like the man I was suppose to resemble. Since my parents had raised me the fashion they had, I thought the only way to do that was to gain power. So I went down into my basement where there were shields to protect me from the rules of the outside world and I spent the entire summer learning anything I could get my hands on. It was not hard to learn because my father was so proud that I had come around to his way of thinking that he got me all the materials need to start my descent into the darker world. I am not sure how I came to understand the world once I finished learning out of books, but I came to the one conclusion that power, indeed, was the only was to succeed.
By the end of that summer, I knew everything that the school could teach me. The only reason I went back was Harry. That, of course was not what I told my dad and I am sure that was not the reason I told myself either. I told him that I could spy for him and that I could get information on Dumbledore. I guess I did not really lie, there were many things that I could tell him about the headmaster and how the school was set up. All of this would make my father proud I was sure.
Now I could have had that bookworm mud blood beaten in my sleep, and I could spy in my free time without any problems. I was ready to go back to school. Before I left, my father, being an especially conniving Death eater, suggested that I keep my talents hidden. It was good advice for which I am greatly thankful. I cannot imagine what would have happened had I not heeded his advice. I am sure that my life would have taken a different path that would have wound up somewhere else. Which probably would not necessary have been bad thing.
I spent the last week working on keeping myself hidden. It was important that I learned how to hide everything. No one could know that I knew all the magic they could teach us at school. Magic is funny that way; there are ways that it can be tracked and the teachers would probably be looking for anything, now that Voldemort was back… So I practised hiding my magic signature. It was the only way that I would be able to last through the year and not get caught. My father had expressed the need to find out what Dumbledore had planned for the war which coming and I was not going to have him give up on me.
As the week came to an end, I knew it was time to see how well my father had taught me. I packed all of my things that I would need for school that year and waited for my mother to take me to the station like she always did.
Thanks again for reading this. I would love to hear what you thought if you have a moment, even if it is just to say 'good' or 'bad'. Oh, and thanks to my wonderful, wonderful beta readers, you guys are amazing. Lastly, thanks to everyone who has already reviewed this I LOVE YOU!