Behind the Mask

This is a poem about what Baldwin was thinking as he lay dying.

O, how the requiem of death comes knocking at my door

Like an unwelcome stranger

The melancholy, gloomy fog of a life's end

Leaving his loved ones

To grieve.

In my daydream, I see the past

My short life rewinding

I see my victories, at a young age

Sixteen, and I had thought

In my glory

I would live to see one hundred.

Now I am twenty-four

And I know my dreams have deceived my fate

For it was predicted that I wouldn't live

To see thirty

My hopes have vanished

Along with my soul

And the years.

I see my dear sister

And I awake from my dream

She has ripened

While I have rotted

For her, the dream

Is still possible.

Look at me, sister

Your grieving does not ease my passing

Smile for me, your doomed brother

You have so much more to live for

My sister smiles sadly

But it takes away the pain at once

I was dreaming, sister

Of the day when I defeated Saladin

I was only sixteen

Do you remember?

Yes, you were beautiful

She weeps as she kisses my mask

I feel that she can see behind it

She holds onto the vague image of me

When I was young

Not the ugly, mutilated face

That disease cursed me with.

Remember me as beautiful

I look outside the window

And I can see a faint light

Of Jerusalem, the Holy City

And I am uplifted by its bright music

Fading but existent

The knocks at my door become louder

My ears hurt from the noise

And I whisper the Lord's Prayer

For thine is the kingdom, the power, and the glory

Forever and ever.

Weakness.

I am falling into the deep pit

Of eternal slumber

Dreaming, dreaming

Of light…

The end.

Note: The end was a cliffhanger. You can assume that he is dead, and the last verse is his thoughts as he enters the unconscious world.