Disclaimer: You guys know by now.

A/N: Well, here we are with another chapter. Seasoned fans of Wife Swap should know by the title what's coming up in this chapter. It should be fun, so I won't delay any longer.

Christine sat in the kitchen of Number 4, Privet Drive, staring at a blank notebook. The first week of her stay with the Dursleys was almost up, and it was time to change the rules.

The boys were at school, and Vernon was at work. Christine was alone in the house except for the cameramen.

She had so many changes to make that she didn't even know where to begin. This family needed serious adjustments.

Finally, Christine began to write. She didn't stop for two hours.

Vernon and Dudley sat on the couch in the living room. Although it was a three-person couch, Vernon and Dudley took it up without a problem, so Harry sat off to one side in an uncomfortable chair. Christine stood in front of them all, list of new rules in hand. Some cameras were on Christine, others on the Dursleys. One was on Harry.

"Well," said Christine, not quite knowing how to begin. "Well," she started again.

"Well what?" said Vernon irritatedly. "What are these new rules, then?"

"Well, the first new rule deals with Harry. Actually, quite a few of the rules are about Harry."

In his corner, Harry perked up. He even looked slightly hopeful.

"The first rule is- Harry's bedroom. He can't sleep in that cupboard anymore. Not when you have extra rooms upstairs. So today I'm moving him to Dudley's second bedroom."

Harry's eyes widened as if he couldn't believe his luck.

"NO!" shouted Dudley. Christine was under the impression that he would have jumped up if he had thought it would be worth the effort. "No! He can't have my room! I need it!"

"I'm not kicking you out of the room you sleep in, Dudley. I'm not even going to make you move your stuff out of Harry's, at least not now. Harry's going to sleep there. It will be his room. If you want any of the stuff in it, you can move it."

Dudley looked as if he were going to throw a tantrum, but stopped at a glare from his father.

"Another thing about Harry- he does entirely too much work around here. From now on, Vernon, you'll be making dinner. Dudley, you'll be doing the dishes. I'll clean while I'm at home during the day, and Dudley and Vernon can help me with little things like sweeping. Harry is being relieved of chores for the week."

Harry's jaw dropped.

This time, Vernon and Dudley both exploded.

"I won't do any dishes!"

"Make dinner! While that lazy, good-for-nothing…"

"But I don't want to sweep!"

Christine yet them yell for a moment until she had had enough.

"You will follow my rules! Harry is not lazy Vernon. He does more work around this place than you do."

"I work to put food on this table."

"That doesn't mean that you can't help to keep that table clean. Besides, what about Dudley? If Harry has to do these chores, why doesn't he?"

Vernon opened his mouth as if to provide a clinching argument as to why Harry should work, but seemed to think better of it. He sat back in the couch with a huff.

"Third, Harry needs clothes that fit. Tomorrow I'm picking him up from school and we're going to get new clothes for him."

Vernon glared but said nothing. Harry just shook his head disbelievingly.

"Dudley, I have two rules for you. The first is about your room. It's a mess, and I want you to clean it."

Dudley looked as if he was about to start arguing, but his father shook his head at him. He looked angrily at his father, and then glared at Christine.

"The second is your diet. I'm putting you on a balanced diet, Dudley. That means vegetables and fruit along with all of your junk food. Actually, I'm cutting you off from junk food."

"WHAT?" shouted Dudley.

"Now, really, there's no need for…" started Vernon, but Christine cut him off.

"No. Don't try to stop me. I lived under your rules, now you're going to live under mine. Dudley's diet is unhealthy, and I'm only trying to help. So Dudley, you're going to follow your new diet."

At that, Vernon quieted down, obviously not wanting to make a fuss on national television. Dudley was fuming, but he followed his father's lead. Off in his corner, Harry, was losing a battle not to laugh.

"Now," said Christine, "Harry's about to move into your second bedroom, Dudley, so I suggest that you go move the things that you want to."

Dudley stomped off upstairs, followed shortly by Vernon.

When Dudley had taken his sweet time removing a sum total of three things from his second bedroom, Christine helped Harry to gather his things and carry them up to his new room. She was appalled at how few things he had. Two pairs of jeans, five shirts, five pairs of socks, five sets of underwear. Nothing more. The room already had a bed and blanket and sheets and pillows, so they didn't even bother to remove the cot.

Upon entering his new room, Harry promptly set his things on the bed and just looked around.

"It's so big," he said.

The room was small. Ten feet by fifteen, actually, which isn't huge. But Christine supposed that anything that wasn't a cupboard would seem big to Harry.

"Yeah," said Christine awkwardly. She wasn't sure what one said in conversations like these.

Harry, meanwhile, was still staring at the room.

"I'd better go supervise dinner with your Uncle," said Christine.

"Bye, Christine," said Harry. "Thank you," he added, so quietly that she almost missed it.

After dinner (chicken, asparagus, salad, strawberries, and bread) Christine made sure that Dudley did the dishes. The boy seemed close to throwing a fit, but the presence of cameras which would be showing his every move on national television seemed to calm him somewhat, and he got through it with nothing more than grumbling.

Christine cleaned the rest of the kitchen herself. As she worked, she thought about her own life. Her daughter, Jessica, was just two years younger than these children. Christine couldn't imagine her child in the position of either Dudley or Harry. She didn't want to.

Christine had only spent a week with the Dursleys, and already she appreciated her normal life more than she had ever thought possible.

A/N: Yes, I know it's a short chapter, but it just seemed like a good place to end. Still to come, we have clothes shopping with Harry, more yelling at the Dursleys, and a big twist that I hope no one sees coming. It should be fun!

Thanks so much to everyone who reviewed!

power214063: I really did think long and hard about Petunia, but in the end I decided against it. This story is about Christine and Harry, not Petunia. Like I said before, that doesn't mean that we won't find out how Petunia fared. We just won't see it from her point of view. Fans of Wife Swap should have figured out by now how this will happen.

american-born-confused-desi: Thank you! Actually, it's towards the end of the year, so I don't have a ton of homework, plus we had half-days all next week. I'll still be updating pretty regularly though.

HaRrYrOMuhSoX: Wow, your name is hard to type. I know that my chapters are short. Often the reason is simply that I find a place that I like for an ending, and there's only so much that I can write to fill up the chapter. All of my chapters have been at least five pages long.

Insanitysplea: Thank you! I'm glad you like it! As I said before, I won't actually be writing a scene of Petunia at Christine's house, but you will get to find out a little about what happened.

Midgette: As you can see from the chapter, Harry's reaction is torn between disbelief and amusement. We'll see more of his thoughts on the matter in the next chapter.

veritas: I'm also a fan of Wife Swap, although I wasn't watching it when I thought of this story. I was watching Hope and Faith, quite by accident really, as I never watch that show. Anyway, they were doing a "Wife Swap" episode, and I started thinking about how Harry would react… And thus this fic was born.

Wow! Six reviews! Thanks again to all those who took the time to review, and please review again!