Oooh, fourth chapter! It's a bit longer than the last, thankfully, and Rei gets angry again! And the next chapter...dundundun...is the last one! It's kind of short, though. It's more a sort of conclusion than a chapter... I got lots of reviews again and it made me feel squishy and happy. I love you guys (in a highly platonic way)!
M.S.K: In this fic, Kai's not one for making declarations like that. He does get to calm down a hysterically angry Rei though...
Endoh Chiaki: I can't leave them apart now I've started! It'll just take a bit of persuasion and temper tantrums before they -do- get together!
Just that good: I know...but I couldn't resist putting in as little pre-story angst!
Kaei kon: Yeah, I know what you mean, I think the server must have gone down or something because you couldn't login or review anything... I don't mind that you didn't review, because you couldn't!
Lil-inu: Well...Kai was in his room and then Rei came in to talk to him (and give him a massage and shout at him)- that was when he went to see him. I -nearly- fell asleep in my RE exam, but not quite. I did start dropping my lucky penny on the desk to make noise though- I HATE it when it's all silent in the exam hall, it drives me mad!
Delores L: Peace to you too! I'm glad you think it's okay so far!
Chinese Fairy: Wait no longer! The next chapter is here!
MikeyWaysgirl: I really did make Rei's life a misery, but I promise it'll get better!
Prozacfairy: I like angry Rei, he's so much fun to write! He loses his temper again in this chapter as well, though...
Skimmie: Here you go, I did!
Platinum Rei: Nah, it wasn't your computer, the whole site went down. I couldn't access from home or the library, and neither could Peachmelba or Firefairy, so I figure it was the server or something. I'm glad I don't disappoint you!
Devilburns: I'm glad you like it so far!
Fifi mcfu: Soon enough? Heh, I'm glad you like it!
Ellen: You think you're crazy? I've just been doing personality quizzes on the BBC website. Apparently I'm at medium risk of promiscuity. Oh well. I didn't really think about the 'ness of him having his hair down...but then, I don't think of Bryan as such a meanie because I always make him nice/semi-nice in my fics (I'm a sucker for Russians, what can I say?)!
Darksaphire: Did I hear you mention the word angst? Yay! There will be angst, mostly on Rei's part because Kai is as dense as…as….a dense thing! Oh, and before, when I said that Rei was single for a reason…well, the reason's in this chapter if you were still wondering…
Ice Spirit: Poor little Rei, poor little Kai, but...there IS a happy ending.
SaFire flamE: Hehe, I'm glad you like it! And yes, this chapter is a bit longer than the last one...
Helen: Naughty naughty, pervy thoughts! I've never actually done a lemon before…maybe I should try one one of these days… Hee, vodka makes me think of Russia, Russia makes me think of the Demolition Boys…okay, so I have a one-track, yaoi fanfiction orientated mind… Ha, someone reviewed one of my first fics thinking I was someone else (they thought I was a man for some reason…) and said only gay guys and sick girls write this much yaoi. Well, screw 'em. I'm going to keep writing yaoi, so nyah!
Kiko cat: Kai isn't selfish, per se, but remember he's been living in luxury for ten years- he's used to having people look after him and his needs, and he hasn't had to think about other people. When he realises how much he hurt Rei, he's going to rethink it…but I'll stop spoiling the chapter and let you get on with reading it!
Darkangelintheshadows: Yeah, I'll keep going, but this is the second last chapter, so there isn't all that much of it left…
Animeobsession: Wasn't your com, the server went all funny. I hope you like this chapter as much as you did the last one!
For the next fortnight, Rei avoided Kai in every way, shape, and form. He was never on call on a night, he never did any of Kai's treatments, and he never looked Kai in the face if they happened to pass one another in a corridor. Kai was starting to walk again, though with the aid of crutches, and before very long he learned to be quite adept with them. He made concentrated efforts to see Rei, but Rei avoided him all the more cleverly.
However, one night, Rei didn't have the option. It started off with a bird.
Kai was lying in his bed, trying to get to sleep. He'd been in bed for the past hour, but there was a bird singing outside his window, despite the fact that it was pitch dark, and he was finding it hard to switch off. In the end, he gave up, deciding to go for a walk. Maybe if he exercised he'd be tired enough to be able to ignore the bird...
He grabbed his crutches and levered himself out of bed before going over to his door and slipping out into the corridor. He hopped along, mind on overdrive, as always. If he could find a way to stay with Rei...if that was possible...
Too late, he saw the short flight of stairs in front of him. His crutches hit different heights and he overbalanced, falling with a cry and thudding his way down six stairs. He landed at the bottom with his leg twisted under him, one of the crutches jabbed into it painfully. He'd dropped the other one, and it was lying a couple of metres away. The pain in his leg was blinding, maddening, and he groaned.
"Kai?" Kai whimpered as a door clicked and someone walked towards him. "Oh my God, Kai! What happened?"
"Rei?" Kai whispered.
"Of course it's me you idiot! What have you -done- to yourself?"
"I was thinking...I didn't notice the stairs..." Rei untangled him from his crutch and picked him up. "It hurts..."
"Of course it'll hurt!" Rei hesitated for a moment, then started walking. "You'll have to come into my room a minute..." Kai clung to Rei's bare shoulders and gritted his teeth, hissing with pain, shutting his eyes tightly. A door clicked again, and a scent drifted into his nostrils. It was like incense, spice, and... "Rei..." Kai opened his eyes and saw that Rei looked concerned, putting him down gently on the bed and sitting next to him. Familiar hands tugged up his trouser leg and traversed his calf, soothing the worst of the pain.
"Oh Kai...you've made it worse..."
"It's not so bad." Kai said strainedly. "Gives you more time to spend avoiding me, doesn't it?" Rei blushed and carried on massaging. "Did you really...feel so strongly about me?"
"Yes." Kai frowned.
"Then...why didn't you say anything? When we were younger, I mean."
"I was too scared. I thought you'd hate me. And then you just left. You barely even said goodbye, and even when I knew I should have said something...the others were there and I just...couldn't." There was silence for a few seconds.
"I...didn't leave because I didn't care about you all. I...just wanted someone to care about -me-. I wanted to make someone proud...so I went to my Grandfather. Everyone might hate him, but he's the only family I have left!"
"I care. I've always cared." Rei's hands dug a little further, and Kai yawned. "You should be in bed."
"Hm." Rei stopped for a second, then pushed Kai back, making him lay down properly.
"Go to sleep. I'll take you back to your own room when I'm done." Kai grunted and drifted off to sleep.
When he was satisfied that he'd alleviated the worst of the pain caused by the new injury, Rei went to pick Kai up to move him. For a few seconds, he just stared. It was...perfect, somehow. Kai, asleep, chest rising and falling steadily. Bare-chested, as he always had slept, even as a child. It would be so nice to just...
Rei laid himself down beside Kai, and snuggled himself up against the sleeping Russian. It was wrong, it'd only hurt him all the more later...but... With a sob, Rei buried his face in the crook of Kai's neck. It was wrong, it -would- hurt him...but he just couldn't bring himself to move Kai or to move himself...
"Rei?"
"Mm?" Rei yawned and snuggled closer to the warm body beside him.
"Rei...are you awake?"
"Hm? What- oh...Kai..." Rei sat up suddenly, horrified. "Kai!"
"So...you didn't take me back to my room?" Rei blushed heavily.
"I...what time is it?"
"Seven." Rei shot up, looking horrified.
"Oh, Jesus! I was supposed to be with Mrs Tesson an hour ago!" He clapped a hand to the side of his head, panicking, and grabbed the phone off the bedside table beside Kai. Kai reached out and took it off him. "Kai, stop it!"
"No...Mei-Lin came in about half an hour ago..."
"WHAT?" Rei yelped.
"She was looking for you, but I explained that I'd hurt myself in the night and you'd tired yourself out looking after me. She said she'd reassign your treatments for today and leave you to sleep..." Rei took a deep breath and tried to stay calm.
"I'll take you back to your room after I've had a shower. Try not to half kill yourself again in the mean time!" He stalked into his ensuite, full of confusion and mixed emotions. The heat of the shower and the rhythmic spattering of the water on his skin calmed him a little, but not enough to completely dispel the sheer hopelessness he was feeling. Against his will, he was falling in love with Kai all over again, and he knew already that if Kai left him now it would hurt so much more than the first time...
After shampooing his hair and rinsing out the suds, he shut off the shower and stepped out, wrapping his hair in one towel and winding another around his waist. He stepped back out into his room, wary, but Kai appeared to have fallen asleep again. Reassured slightly, Rei went about getting dressed, leaving his shirt off to let his hair dry properly, giving it time to dry a little before he started brushing it. He was cursing over a few unruly tangles, standing before the mirror beside his bed, when a hand touched his waist. He spun round, gasping, but it was only Kai.
"I thought you were asleep!" He said accusingly. Kai frowned slightly.
"Sorry. I just wondered...if you'd like me to brush your hair for you." Rei opened his mouth to say 'no chance', but somewhere between his brain and his tongue the message got mixed up. "Okay..." He whispered, handing over the brush. Kai patted the bed beside himself and Rei sat down, making sure he wasn't sitting on any of his hair.
The second Kai touched him he knew it had been a mistake. Due to the stiffness of Kai's leg, he was sitting behind Rei with it laid straight out in front of him, meaning that Rei's thigh was nestled far too snugly up against Kai's calf for Rei's liking. He tried to forget about it as Kai went to work on his hair, focusing his eyes on a photo on the wall of himself and Lee and Mariah taken a few summers back. Mariah had never exactly been enchanted with the idea of him being gay, but she'd accepted it after a while. And Lee had already confessed to being discreetly bisexual, so Rei knew he had no worries on that front. He remembered the time when Lee had actually told him...it had been at a sleepover when they'd been fourteen, with all the Bladebreakers, the Demolition Boys, and the White Tigers. Actually, Kai had been there...Kai...
"Oh..." Rei let out a tiny moan of pleasure as Kai abandoned the brush in favour of his fingers, trailing them up and down Rei's bare back, making Rei tingle all over and shudder-
He stood up abruptly, shaking slightly. "Kai...I..." Kai looked up at him, eyes ablaze, and Rei found himself getting closer again, crawling in between Kai's leg and kissing him, winding his arms around Kai's neck and forcing their lips tighter together. It hurt but it felt so good...
It was even more unfortunate for Rei when Mei-Lin walked in a few seconds later, shrieked, then ran out again, with a hurried "Forgive me Mr. Kon I didn't realise!". Rei watched her slam the door behind herself helplessly, then started to cry. Kai tightened his arms around his waist, puzzled.
"Rei?"
"Why do you have to go? Why did you have to come in the first place if you're going to go? I'm starting to hate myself Kai, because I can't resist you and I know that I'll be lost when you leave me again but that shouldn't happen because I shouldn't be so weak! I lay here at night and ask myself why! Why do I keep going back to loving you when all it'll do is hurt me? Why can no-one else get under my skin like you? Why can no-one else make me feel like this? Why did I have to love YOU when you don't even care about ME?"
Kai blinked. "Rei...I care..."
"NOT ENOUGH! And it'll never be enough because you don't love me back! Although I'll probably end up crumbling and sleeping with you and then I'll hate myself even more! I love you so much I'm starting to hate you, Kai!"
"But if I wasn't going to leave...if I could stay near you..."
"I DON'T KNOW ANY MORE!" Rei screamed. He tore himself out of Kai's grip and backed away. "I don't know! I haven't felt this way since I was sixteen, Kai! I thought it was just me being young but it isn't! You came here and you dragged it all back up again and correct me if I'm wrong but I'm not sixteen any more! It's not hormones! It's love! And it hurts like HELL! And I can't just run away from it all like you have a habit of doing!"
"W-What?"
"You heard me! All those times you ran off back to your Grandfather and his team of FREAKS, when you left to go back to your Grandfather again because you wanted APPROVAL! You ran away from everything, Kai! You ran away from ME!" Kai went pale, then tried to stand up. His leg buckled beneath him and he fell. Rei caught him before he hit the floor, still hissing. "I used to cook for you, I used to clean for you, I used to practice with you because you were OBSESSED about being the best! You said you left because you wanted someone to care! I cared! Why do you think I put up with you being surly all the time? Why do you think I always offered to share a room with you? For one I knew it would drive you mad if you had to stay with Tyson, and beside that I wanted to be close to you!
"I wanted nothing more than to be close to you! I still do but now I want more than that, Kai! Actually, even before you came I was thinking about finding someone to settle down with but I couldn't find anyone! I didn't want anyone enough because I spent so long wanting you! I HATE you! But I love you at the same time and it's driving me insane!"
A hand grabbed his wrist in a firm grip. "Rei, stop it. Calm down."
"WHY?"
"If you carry on like that you'll hurt yourself. Now calm down. Tell me what I can do to make it right." Rei propped Kai up against the bed and crawled onto his lap once again.
"Don't leave me...don't leave me again..." He begged. "Don't just run away and leave me alone..."
"I didn't run away from you...I just never knew you felt like that about me...I'm not psychic, Rei...how was I supposed to know? Even when I got here...you didn't tell me all this...did you think I never appreciated what you did for me? Because I did. I know you made sacrifices for me...I just never thought that...they meant all that." Kai slipped his arms around Rei's waist. "Rei...I think...I've just had an idea..." He smiled. "Rei...if I could stay pretty close to here...would you consider...trying to make it work with me? I know it's a lot to ask, but..."
"If you stay...I could try..."
Next Chapter: Something of an epilogue. Rei has an encounter with a journalist, and Kai ends up getting mightily embarrassed!
R&R please!