Mean Things I've Done To Dr. Julian Bashir (or Sue's Revenge)

by Lyda Mae (RavenDove) Huff

Chapter Three: Mary Sue Meets Battered Swen

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This chapter is a section from a self insert that I wrote a few years back. No it isn't that great. It is very much the bane that all self inserts have become. but in light of my own self realizations it becomes quite interesting when I have Dr. Bashir and his friends at a disadvantage.

Lyda Mae (RavenDove) Huff

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"She appears to be human, but not exactly in the best of health." Dr. Julian Bashir admitted, looking up from his scanner. "She is suffering from the combined effects of several genetic diseases, long term exposure to various toxins, repetitive injury to most of her joints, and her blood contains traces of drugs that haven't even been manufactured in over a century and a half."

Commander Benjamin Sisko sighed, "Her cloths are like something out of the late twentieth century." Sisko thought a moment. "Can you scan her for chronoton particles?"

Bashir's brow furrowed, "I don't usually do that but I think I can reconfigure the scanner." The doctor pressed a series of buttons and furrowed his brow even further. "I'm not only picking up chronotons. There is also a slight elevation of tachyons around her."

Sisko looked down at her delicate face framed by short locks of ash. There was a delicate silver dove earing in each of her ears and a black onyx tear drop above the dove in the right ear lobe. The left lobe only bore a scar where the tear drop should have been. It, was a wonder that she had any jewelry left at all having materialized in Quarks. Only the earrings, a steel ID tag and a hematite anklet that had been tucked in her sock remained, but marks on her finger's and indicated there had been more. He turned the old-fashioned metal ID tag on her neck so he could read it.

JEPPESEN-HUFF,
LYDA MAE
A.K.A. RAVENDOVE
BIPOLAR DISORDER,
ASTHMA

A pale, delicate hand enclosed his, "I'd let go if I were you." Lyda's brown eyes had fire in them, and Sisko did exactly what she said. Bashir offered her a hand as she tried to sit up and she accepted it.

"I'm Commander Benjamin Sisko . . . "

"And he is Dr. Julian Subatoi Bashir." Lyda interrupted pointing to the doctor.

"How did you know my name?" Bashir asked in shock.

"Because none of this is really happening. I'm safe at home, and I've fallen asleep with the television on." she replied in denial.

"Where exactly are you from Leeda, and do you have any idea how you ended up in Quark's?" Sisko asked.

"Lie-da Mae."

"Come again?"

"My name," she answered, "the Y is pronounced as a long I; not a long E."

"I'm sorry Lyda Mae, would you please answer my questions?"

"The last thing I remember is being in the temple of Sinawava on the fifteenth of Feb. 2002." Lyda looked at her stocking feet. "It was nearing dusk, and I had stopped to shake the rocks out of my shoes. There are superstitions about taking things from places where old gods are suppose to dwell, and I have enough trouble in my life without chancing them."

"What happened next?" Bashir asked with interest.

"The Trickster came out of the river and look me straight in the face; then I land on a Dabo table, pass out and wake up here." she was beginning to rant. "Here of all places, and judging by your uniforms the Dominion wars haven't even started yet."

"Dominion wars?" Sisko was not sure what to make of this woman.

Lyda took a good look at Sisko for the first time."You're still a commander and you haven't grown a beard yet." by now she was pacing the room nervously."Is this after the Circle?"

"You mean the Cardassian plot to make the federation pull out of Bajoran space." Sisko nodded the affirmative along with Lyda and Bashir. "We are still in the process of recalling evacuated personnel."

"You'll just have to evacuate them all again very shortly for a major plasma storm." Lyda stopped in her tracks and looked right at Sisko with her hands behind her back in a very Daxesque fashion.

Sisko gazed at her intensely, "How do you know all this?"

"The same way I know that it took the Prophets to help you get past Jennifer's death, and Dr. Bashir hides behind bluster because he has a self confidence problem that stems from a self revelation when he was fifteen years old." she turned to face Bashir. "It's the same reason he insists on going by Julian instead of Jules." Bashir looked away with shame. "To me this is a dream universe that they make movies about, and write epic novels about. I'm not just from back in time compared to you. I'm from a time line where the Eugenics wars never took place. A place where Khan Singh was never born, but an actor that looks remarkably like him was." She leaned against the diagnostic bed and sighed. "Like I said; I'm dreaming."

Sisko thought on that a moment. "I seem to remember a pre-Cochrane philosopher who said that even the dreams of men have substance, but I never could understand what she meant."

"If I'm really here it begs the question of who dreamed who into existence."

Bashir shrugged, "So far as I know I was real when I got up this morning, and as a doctor I would prefer to leave the rest of this discussion till after my patient has been treated."

Sisko shook his head as he turned to leave the infirmary. "We'll have to figure out what to do about your presence in this time line later Lyda Mae."

Bashir helped Lyda back onto the bio-bed and checked to make sure no one was within ear shot. "Just how much do you know?"

"Enough to understand what accelerated critical neural pathway formation is." Lyda answered. "I'm not going to tell anyone because the day will come when they find out on their own anyway."

"Can you tell me how or when?"

"No Doctor," she sighed, "but I can tell you that you will not be left without defenders. Your friends will know you for what you really are by then, and they won't see the monster that you see in the mirror."

Bashir nodded accepting her answer. "So would you mind telling me if the Valproic Acid was proscribed for seizures, migraines, or the bipolar disorder mentioned on your ID tag?"

"All of the above," Lyda admitted, "but the seizures aren't true seizures because they don't register on an EEG."

"That's because you carry the gene for Mayes Syndrome, and Mayes Syndrome seizures aren't caused by electrical disruption in the brain." Bashir worked the controls on one of his instruments as he pulled the apparatus over to the bio-bed. "I can suppress the gene as well as the one for bipolar disorder if you're willing to lie still for a while." He then pulled a gown from a storage cabinet. "I can also correct the curvature of your spine while I'm at it."

"Can you cure my allergy to peppers as well?" she asked, taking the gown.

"Yes," he said finishing the adjustments on the apparatus, "you can change in that side room over there." he pointed to a room off the side of the main one. "Anything I can't correct I can at least make more bearable," he shrugged, "everything but your eyesight. Ambliopia is still only successfully treated in small children."

Lyda emerged from the side room struggling to tie the gown. "That's alright. I'm use to a one-sided view of life."

"Why didn't they catch that when you were little?" Bashir asked asked tied her gown.

"They weren't looking."

"Oh."

Commander Sisko was sitting alone in his office contemplating his autographed baseball. He wasn't sure about anything at the moment. Vedics Winn and Bareil were both due from Bajor tomorrow, along with several ministers to discuss affairs now that the circle was exposed for what it was. The arrival of Lyda Mae Jeppesen-Huff in Quark's could not have come at a worse time. Sisko looked up as the door chimed, "Come in."

Constable Odo entered, "Commander."

Sisko placed the ball back on its stand. "Did you find something interesting Constable?"

Odo handed the Commander a PADD, "Yes actually. The Temple of Sinawava is in Zion National Park on the North American continent of Earth, but you probably already know that."

"I went there on a field trip once in grammar school."

Odo nodded, "Since that's in the old state of Utah I started my search there going by the date she gave and what Dr. Bashir estimates her age to be."

"What did you find?"

"According to the LDS Family History Library in Salt Lake City, Utah, Lyda Mae Jeppesen was born November 6, 1978 in Tooele, Utah to Jay R. Jeppesen, and Marlene E. (Jacobson). Died February 28, 1983 of a respiratory infection, and was interned in the Provo, Utah City Cemetery."

Sisko confirmed the facts from the PADD he had been given. "Have you requested that the body be exhumed for DNA confirmation?"

"I have," the changeling's face grew long, "but the results wont arrive until day after tomorrow at the earliest even if any surviving relatives don't object."

Sisko stood up and place the PADD on his desk. "I guess we'll just have to wait for the results to arrive Constable. Until then keep a close eye on our guest, but try not to crowd her."

Odo nodded as he turned to leave, "Understood Commander."

The LDS Family History Library is located across the street from Temple Square in Salt Lake City, Utah.

Bashir led the bare foot Lyda Mae from the Infirmary to Garak's Tailor shop. "Are you sure about this?"

"He's the best clothier around." Lyda answered clutching the parcel that was her jacket, knapsack and shoe. She wore blue jeans and a pink T-shirt over light-blue long underwear.

Julian looked back at her raising an eyebrow, "But do you really intend to blackmail him?"

"I need the cloths Julian." she said sarcastically as she passed him and stepped into the shop.

"I'm sure you could make arrangements with Commander Sisko to pay for them, or if you like I'll pay for them." he said, pulling her to a halt.

She turned to face him, "Why should someone else pay my way Julian? You already suspect the man of being a spy, and I'm just dealing in information like him."

Julian's expression grew sour, "I still wish you wouldn't."

"Wouldn't what Doctor?" Garak asked as he entered the main room of his shop.

Lyda looked at him then thrust her bundle at Bashir. "Alright you make the arrangements to pay, but I'm still going to enjoy myself, and if something happens to me Starfleet will have a suspect."

Julian sighed relief as he took the bundle. "Garak, I'd like you to meet Lyda Mae Huff."

Garak took Lyda's hand, "No doubt the lady that dropped in on Quark's establishment earlier." he kissed the delicate hand.

"Small station." Lyda commented back. "Julian and I were just discussing how Mila would be a good name for a pet rengar."

Garak looked up at her with a start.

"Out of curiosity Mr. Garak," Lyda continued, "as a Cardassian, what is your opinion of Hebitian poetry in general."

Garak released her hand, his composure only the slightest bit shaken. "I don't usually discuss such subjects madam."

"More's the pity." Lyda clucked.

Julian put a hand on Garak's shoulder to steady him. "She seams to have this effect on everyone Garak. She's from an alternate time line, and has knowledge of future events."

"But at the moment I'm stuck here and need cloths."

Garak shook his head with renewed resolve as he picked up a measuring tool. "Does the lady have an idea what she wants?"

Lyda stood straight with a coy smile. "I know exactly what I want."

"I'll make arrangements from Payment . . . "

Garak interrupted, "I have the distinct feeling that won't be necessary Doctor."

"Are you sure?"

Garak ran the measuring scanner over Lyda, "Quite."

Star Trek: Deep Space Nine #27: A Stitch In Time by Andrew Robinson:)

Lyda took one last glance at herself in the clothier's full length mirror before joining Julian at the front of the shop. She now wore a medium-brown full length wrap around skirt and jacket with a tan blouse dark brown mid-calf boot and belt topped off with a matching leather Dutch cap that was cocked to the left. The buckles on her belt, boots and jacket were all silver, as was the small angel on the front of her cap. The outfit was versatile, she had designed it so that the skirt could be removed revealing a pair of tan pants that matched the blouse. She wrapped a medium-brown scarf around her slender neck and picked up her knapsack. Oddly enough she had actually found room in the bag for her old cloths and all of her new acquisitions, accept what she currently wore, and still had room left over.

Garak made a finale check to make sure the outfit wore just right. "You have an eye for design my dear." he admitted with a touch of dry envy in his voice.

"Thank you Mr. Garak, but it does not come without some experience."

Julian was leaning on a counter near by, "The shades you chose really bring out the color of your eyes."

Lyda blushed, "I always try to play off my best feature. After all if people are looking at my eyes they don't see how big my nose is."

Julian came forward and bent a little to scrutinize her face. "I don't think it's big at all."

"Don't try to flatter me Julian," she replied in a manner the indicated her good humor was wearing thin, "I'm a married woman." She looked down at her left hand and then held it up for both men to see. "Speaking of which, I need to see a certain Ferengi about a missing ring."

"I think we'd best be going then." Julian looked to Garak, "Are we still on tomorrow for lunch?"

"Yes," Garak replied as he began putting bolts of cloth away, "and by all means bring Ms. Huff along."

Julian nodded and followed Lyda out of the shop.

Lyda strode into Quark's calmly with Julian on her heals. Quark was tidying up behind the bar and turned to face them. "I'll get you whatever you want Doctor, but your new friend owes me for the damage to my dabo table."

Lyda braced herself against the bar reached over and grabbed Quark by the lapels. "Stow it! Where are my cartuce, wedding ring and seal? I know I was wearing them when I disappeared, and when I passed out in here, but they were gone when I reached the infirmary."

At that moment Constable Odo entered the establishment. "Is there a problem here?"

Lyda replied without taking her eyes off of her captive. "Not at all Constable, I was just inquiring about some missing property of mine."

One of Quark's Ferengi waiters stumbled in from the storage room and Julian saw him drop something shiny. He bent to pick it up but the Doctor stopped him. "I believe I found your cartuce," he said as he took a good look at it. It was about 1.25 centimeters wide by 4.25 centimeters long, made of silver and strung on a red cord with two small silver beads on each side. On the front was the name Lyda rendered in Arabic script, and on the back was Lida spelled out in bold English letters. "but you name is misspelled on the back."

Lyda let go of Quark and shrugged as she took the pendent from Julian. "It's always been like that." She put it around her neck, "A relative had it made in Kuwait, and I don't know if it was him or the jeweler that got it wrong."

Odo took out a tricorder and scanned the waiter. "Is there anything else of yours missing?"

"My wedding ring, seal, watch and healing bracelet." Lyda answered. "The stones are probably worth more than the metal."

"Can you describe them?"

"Ten karat gold, slender band, heart shaped bezel, three tiny low grade diamonds at top of the left loop, and one large tear drop shaped blue topaz set upside down to the heart." she paused. "Oh! And one of the three prongs that held the topaz was slightly deformed." she paused again, "The seal was worthless to anyone but me. It was made of lusterum and had a simulated sapphire, but it had my names on it. Both my given name and the English translation of the name I was given among the Cherokee; which is Joy. The watch was a silver ladies Timex Indiglo on a green Iron Man band. As for the bracelet; it was copper with brass trim, silver sanscrit writing and two silver mounted carnelian."

"He's hiding the rings in his head skirt, and the bracelet and watch in his left jacket pocket." Julian plucked the skirt from the waiter's head and the waiter removed the other stolen items from his pocket. They were all handed to Lyda who slipped them on and then polished the rings against her jacket. Odo examined the head skirt more closely, "Huh! A secret pocket." He then turned to Quark, "How much would you say the wedding ring is worth anyway."

Quark took Lyda's hand in his own and examined the ring, then estimated. "I'd give two strips of latinum for the topaz because of how brilliant the color is, but I'm a bar tender and don't know much about the gem market." he let go of her hand. "That doesn't settle the matter of my damaged dabo table."

"Oh yes it does Quark," Lyda smiled, "because in exchange for my not pressing charges you can take it out of your sticky fingered waiter's pay."

At this, the waiter finally found voice to object, "But that will cost me more than the lot was worth!"

Odo humphed, "You should have thought of that before you took the lady's jewelry in the first place."

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