Author: RavenEcho
Summary: Ginny hurts. And no one knows. It's not easy being a number. Her number is zero, because that's how many people understand her…probably a Draco/Ginny waiting to happen. Some Ginny/Remus.
Disclaimer: If I owned this stuff, would I really be on this computer typing away right now? No… I would be eating some rich-people-food in my gigantic English manor…
Touch Me
IMPORTANT NOTICE: I just wish to say a word that concerns a couple of reviews I have received. A few of my readers have expressed some dislike of the cutting in my story. I believe that this is an integral part of the story to display Ginny's pure insecurity and self-despising attitude. I'd also like to say that I in no way advocate cutting whatsoever. Or anorexia, or bulimia. I advise everyone to try to stop if they've started any of these habits, or to never start if they haven't. I've been through my fair share of most of it, and it's nothing anybody should ever get into. That's all, kids.
Chapter 16: My Demon; My Angel
"Hey, don't freak, it's just me," Draco's familiar voice washed over her. The tall figure pulled down its hood, revealing telltale white-blond hair.
"Oh yeah, that's a reason not to panic," Ginny snapped sarcastically.
Draco rolled his eyes. "What were you doing out here anyway? It's past two in the morning."
"I could ask you the same thing," she retorted, pulling her robe even tighter around herself to hide her nakedness.
Draco sat down next to the girl. "I don't see any blood," he observed, raising an eyebrow.
"I forgot my knife in my dorm," she replied immediately.
"Why'd you even leave your dorms to begin with?" he asked, not caring that he sounded as if he was prying.
Ginny stared dully at Draco before apathetically answering, "I've started having nightmares again. About Tom. Every night."
"For how long?" Draco asked, eyeing her almost translucent skin and the dark smudges under her eyes.
"A few weeks," she replied blandly.
"And how much sleep have you been getting every night because of it?"
"Two hours usually, three if I'm lucky. I've learned to hide the evidence. No one asks questions."
"You could have asked for Dreamless Sleep Potion at the infirmary," Draco pointed out. Ginny shrugged. "You don't seem to care," he noticed. If Ginny was going to speak, he intercepted it. "But I know differently. You're trying to act indifferent, but that's all it is: an act. And even though no one else can see it, I can." Draco was standing over Ginny now, caught in the moment, his voice getting more deadly quiet with every word. "When are you going to stop acting, Ginny?"
Draco looked into Ginny's eyes and immediately recognized the fear there. Damn him, here, standing over her, he reminded her of Tom. This one thing could crush him, could wipe him out, put a black mark by his name in her book. Draco dropped to the ground next to her. He pushed a hand through her hair.
"Ginny, I'm not Tom," he murmured, placing whisper soft kisses on her neck. "If you want me to, I'll show you," he said, looking into her eyes. "It's up to you."
Ginny shivered with desire. His entire body was flat against hers. The silky fabric of his cloak slid against her naked skin. Draco was being gentle, with feather kisses and light touches. And then suddenly it was all too fast, and Draco was Tom all over again, only nicer this time, and no she didn't want to and she was scared and she couldn't make him stop and soon it'd be too late and, "I can't," she gasped, pulling away. "I can't, I can't, I can't," she cried, shoving him away and standing up, all too aware of her undress. "You say you aren't Tom, but you are, you are, you're lying." With no more explanation than that she bolted from the garden, leaving Draco all alone.
The next morning, Ginny actually went down to breakfast in the Great Hall. She didn't eat much, a piece of bread and a bit of fruit, but what she did eat, she ate defiantly, as if daring Draco to accuse her of anorexia again. She carefully avoided the Slytherin's eyes, even when a small package came to her in the mail. It was a tiny bottle of Dreamless Sleep Potion, and Ginny knew whom it was from before she even read the note taped to the side.
Four drops per night. I hope it'll help you differentiate between nightmares and reality.
Ginny nodded to herself. The note was cold, curt, and slightly cruel, just like the one who had written it. She resisted the urge to smash the bottle to the ground and tucked it into her pocket instead. No use wasting good potion.
Draco watched from across the Hall with a bittersweet smile. He hoped she'd actually used the potion, though it wasn't likely. He knew he'd messed up last night, big time. It was a mistake that had certainly caused a lot of damage, damage that would take a long time for Ginny to forgive, and even longer to forget, if she ever did. So Draco eased back in his chair, willing to wait and watch. His part in her story was over until Ginny chose otherwise.
AUTHOR'S NOTE: I hope ya'll all read the notice up top, especially those who were concerned about it. I actually had this chapter written on Thursday, but I've been swamped and unable to get it up until now. I have an AP (college-level) World History exam this Tuesday, and I've been going crazy worrying about it. So I almost definitely won't get anything up until after that. Wish me luck!
REVIEW RESPONSES: EternalEcho, RiotBird (please read notice if you haven't already), GermanBabe (please read notice if you haven't already), Eternal Dragon101 (lol thanks for the enthusiasm), dakangl (that's fine… where'd you go?), moonlightwitch (ouch strep throat sucks, I know…)