A/N: Hello reviewers! I lub u all! Cause ur all sooooo nice! I'm tired right now therefore slightly hallucinatory, so ignore it….also soy hungry. I'm gonna go find food and then write….

"Your foot is on my arm," Remus remarked carelessly.

"Well your arm is in my face," Sirius responded in the same lazy tone.

Remus was propped up on a stack of pillows, watching TV, and next to him Sirius Black was curled around his pillow. Remus looked down at the uncomfortable Sirius, smirking. "You know you could've just gone downstairs, you didn't have to insist on stealing my bed."

"Sirius Black does not sleep on a cot," Sirius growled.

Remus shrugged and maneuvered so his leg was sprawled across Sirius and his hand completely covered the other man's face. "Better?" Sirius grumbled loudly, but being the stubborn as he was, held his ground.

"You know Sirius there is a gigantic comfortable couch down here!" James yelled.

"No thanks Jamsey," Sirius called down. "We'll smoke the monster out!"

"Are you referring to Alice in Wonderland?" Remus snorted.

"Yes, in the scene where they attempt to kick someone out of a house. I think this is a similar situation except our predicament revolves around a bed," Sirius explained in a
college professor voice.

"You know the floor's very comfortable."

"Oh burn in-" Sirius cut himself off, seeing Remus' pleased smirk. "…Somewhere very hot and unpleasant."

Remus grinned and turned back to the TV.

And so the Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe…I mean the Wolf, the Killer, and the James spent the rest of the afternoon watching TV and losing brain-cells. It was not till six that Sirius began to inquire about dinner.

"So, what's for dinner?" Sirius asked, still curled on Remus' bed.

Remus glared, "Dog food for you, Chinese for me and James,"

"Oh you're funny, very funny," Sirius growled.

James tramped up stairs and glared at them. "Now, children, let's focus on dinner, not Remus' witty humor."

"I want Chinese!" Sirius pouted.

"Remus?" James asked.

"Chinese."

"Well too bad, we're getting room service," James growled. He was rewarded with similar moans of distaste. "Well I can't go out to the Chinese place and leave you two alone! You'll tear each other to pieces."

"Oh no, there will be no violence as long as I have the bed," Sirius sniggered.

"Oh James! Please get Chinese! We'll be good!" Remus pleaded. "See!" He draped his arm around Sirius' neck and tossed on a cheesy smile.

James glanced wearily at the two of them before finally sighing in defeat. "Fine…I'll be back in a few minutes. If I see even a speck of blood on the carpet I'm going to kill you Sirius!"

The moment the two heard the door close, they sprung apart. In the process Sirius accidentally sprang off the bed. Sirius fell on the ground with a thump. Remus launched a pillow at him with a triumphant cry, "Hah! We smoked the monster out indeed!"

Sirius shot Remus a dirty look, but snatched the pillow and trudged down to the couch. The moment he fell onto it he tried to catch his breath. Being so close to Remus had…done something to him. It hadn't been any intimate contact, but the moment he touched Remus it was like the blond's skin was coated with taffy. He couldn't get all of Remus off. It was like Remus' essence stuck to Sirius' skin.

Sirius looked back up stairs at Remus and sighed. "Remus?"

"What!" Remus snapped.

"You're a werewolf right?"

"Yeah…so?" Remus asked, his voice softened. He wasn't used to being a werewolf, or being thought of as one. Sirius couldn't really tell how Remus felt about being a monster. Sirius' eyes widened suddenly. "We'll smoke the monster out!" Shit. Sirius now deeply regretted saying it…monster…Damn it he'd practically called Remus a monster. He had more tact than that!

"Just…checking." Sirius yawned and fell down on the couch. He'd make it up to Remus. Since when do I give a fuck about a monster? Sirius looked at his arms and felt Remus there, his warmth, his scent…that strange vanilla scent. Sirius sighed, either Remus was a different brand of monster, or Sirius was a different brand of killer.

Things passed smoothly between them. In fact they pretty much ignored each other. James returned fifteen minutes later with cheap Chinese food and chopsticks. James passed out the food and retreated to the computer. The night passed in relative peacefulness until it turned one.

"Hey James? Where do I sleep?" Sirius asked, stepping lightly into the back room.

"The sofa's a pull out," James yawned, gesturing to the couch.

"Ah."

Fifteen minutes later the two men were arranging themselves in the bed with grunts of discomfort. "They lied, there is no way in hell this is a queen sized bed," James growled.

"Did you hook up the trip wire at the front door?" Sirius asked sharply.

"Check."

"Windows?"

"There's a motion sensor on them, I've got a sensor on my wrist, and if anyone tries to get in I get a light electrical shock," James explained. "I set up motion sensors on the stairs to Remus' bed too, but those disable themselves at seven."

"Locks?"

"All three on the door have a padlock, the keys are on my wrist," James yawned.

They lay in silence for a moment before Sirius finally asked. "What if somebody tries to break down the door?"

"There're three guards outside and cans in front of the door inside, if anyone tries to get in it causes a big ass bang," James growled. "Now go to sleep, I've got it covered."

Again they lay in silence.

"Hey Sirius? How come you never say good night?"

Sirius' chest clenched tightly and his head swam. "The last person I said goodnight to wound up dead in the morning. I rolled over and saw a knife sticking out of their chest and their eyes gouged out."

"Oh."

"Yeah…But if I still said it, I'd say it to you James."

James smiled and rolled over so he faced away from Sirius.

The first time James woke up he was freezing cold; he reached down to find his body was completely coverless. He looked over at Sirius, who was completely wrapped in the thick comforter. James growled and yanked the covers away from Sirius and settled them around himself and fell back asleep. The second time James woke up he was again shivering and exposed to the air conditioning. He snarled wordlessly at Sirius and yanked the covers back again. The third time James woke up, he was again freezing. Finally he yanked the covers from Sirius and scooted closer to the smaller man. James, now warm, fell back into a deep slumber.

"Mm….Chocolate…" James' eyes flew open at that warm husky bedroom voice in his ear. He was about to roll over when he suddenly froze. Sirius' arms were wrapped around his body. The smaller man's thick black hair was draped across James' chest and Sirius was pressed tightly against him. "Warm…thick…luscious…sexy chocolate…" Sirius purred.

"Uh…Chocolate's over there…" James squeaked.

"Mm…Chocolate…" Sirius sighed, rolling away from James. James breathed a sigh of relief and fell back asleep.

The fifth time James woke up it was again to a warm body pressed against his, arms around his chest and silky hair spilling on his face. But this time there was something hard pressing against his back. A book? Who sleeps with a book? James thought fuzzily. "Siri--" James voice ascended into a high pitched squeak as he realized what was pressing against him, "--us!"

"You've been a bad, bad girl…" Sirius purred.

James shivered, the only people that couldn't be attracted to Sirius' smoky voice were castrated or eunuchs. "Sirius?"

"Hm…Daddy's gonna get his whip and smack you into shape…Hm…that's right dance around in your cute little leather shorts."

James squeaked wordlessly as Sirius slapped his ass. "Sirius! It's James!"

"And then I'm gonna shoot ya!" James practically shrieked. He fell off the bed and landed on the floor with a thump. "Mm…I'm just kiddin' sexy!" Sirius giggled. James grabbed a sheet, his pillow, and ran from the bed onto the safety of the couch…away from Sirius.

"That's right cardboard cut out of Jenna Jamison…keep on dancing…" Sirius murmured, rolling over.

The next morning Sirius awoke to a tendrils of sunlight trailing in from the window. He smiled and yawned. This is a nice bed…He thought. He slipped back into his jeans and walked into the front room.

"Morning Jamesy, how'd you get out here?" Sirius asked.

James woke up and in a panic fit fell off the couch. "You!" He yelled, pointing at Sirius. "You me-molester!"

"What'd I do!" Sirius exclaimed.

James shot Sirius a look. If looks could kill, Sirius would be pile of ashes on the floor. "Oh, okay. Don't remember? Let me tell you! First you steal all of the covers, and then you kick me!" James raised his shirt to show bruises all over his torso.

"Woops."

"And then, I wake up and you're cuddling with me talking about chocolate! And then I go back to sleep, when I wake up, guess who's cuddling me again? You! And you're saying I've been a bad, bad girl! Daddy's going to get his whip? What the hell are you on?" James ranted. "Did you think all that was funny!"

"Uh…I was sleeping," Sirius said blankly.

"You really don't remember?" James asked, animosity draining from his voice.

"Not a thing…"

"Well, fine! Watch Remus I'm going to sleep!" James growled, pushing past Sirius towards the couch-bed. Sirius shrugged and disappeared into the bathroom with his bag. He emerged twenty minutes later wearing pajama pants and a hip holster. Sirius sauntered over to the kitchen. It was fully equipped for cooking, though it looked like James and Remus hadn't done any. He opened the fridge and found food in it. He shrugged and withdrew a few select items and started to hum.

Remus' nose twitched at the smell of bacon before he was even awake. He blinked and sat up. Somebody was cooking…and humming. James couldn't cook and wasn't even allowed to hum anymore…So that left Sirius? Sirius didn't strike Remus as the type who'd cook…and hum. So the werewolf slipped out of bed and crept down the stairs. He peeked over the railing and saw Sirius, shirtless in the kitchen. "Uh…Sirius?"

Sirius stopped humming long enough to say, "Morning,"

"You made breakfast?" Remus asked.

"Uh huh, it's on the coffee table," Sirius yawned. He stretched his arms over his head in a catlike pose. His black hair was slightly damp and wildly curly, tumbling over his chest. His hair off set his pale skin just as his eyes did.

Remus went every shade of pink and mumbled a small thanks before going over to the coffee table. Sirius watched him curiously. Why would he blush? Sirius pondered. He got himself a plate of food and joined Remus on the red couch.

"So…." Remus said, his voice unfailingly polite again.

"You're always trying to talk," Sirius sighed. He glanced over at Remus.

"What, you don't like it?" Remus asked.

"No…It's just an observation." Sirius shrugged. He reached over to grab the remote when a hand grasping his wrist stopped him. He looked over and found Remus' face inches from his own.

"And are you observing me?"

Sirius looked at Remus for a moment…There was a scar, slicing perfectly along his cheekbone. It was faded now, just a hint of discoloration at the surface. "Where'd you get the scar?"

Remus' hand immediately slapped to his cheek, as if to cover the scar. His eyes shifted downward like a kicked dog. "I tripped, on a rock." Sirius smiled and scooted closer to Remus. He looked up suddenly, amber eyes bright and swirling. Sirius gently pushed Remus' hand from the scar and traced it with his thumb.

"It must have been a very, very sharp rock you fell on."

"Yeah…" Remus murmured. He shifted his face away from Sirius' hand and let his hair tumble over his cheek. Sirius reached out to the werewolf's cheek again and tenderly pushed the hair away from the scar. Remus looked up at him with those wide eyes, bursting with copper and gold. For a moment there was no hotel room, just the two of them and Remus' eyes.

"If it means anything, I like it."