I'm not really sure how I did it, but somehow I pulled off a straight face when Vaughn told me Alice was KGB. It's not that this comment was funny, it was because I wasn't aware whether I was going to break down crying from relief, guilt, anger, and confusion or weather I truly would just start laughing my head off and lose it completely for these exact same reasons. Perhaps god was feeling piteous on this particular day?
So we talked it over, we did the kiss and make up routine, or at least he did, I'm still not sure how I feel about the Alice thing and he never did say it wouldn't happen again...if it's his job and he's been tracking her for over 3 years would he really just stop? And then the eternal question, do I say anything about Sark? I'm sure Vaughn would love it if I tried to explain my actions 'oh well you see Vaughn… I was pissed off and he was there, and you were off screwing Alice, and I thought I might as well get some too…' So I decide to keep quiet.
We go out to dinner at one of his favorite restaurants…the food isn't all that great really…I guess you notice these trivial things more when your preoccupied. He tries to feed me a piece of his dessert, I force a smile but almost gag as it slides slowly down my throat. After dinner we go back to my house, it is a long and uncomfortable ride. Only the occasional word is exchanged… I'd lie about having laryngitis if I thought he would believe me. When we reach my home he wastes no time in getting me to the bed. The sex is cold and emotionless much more so than it had been with Sark…at least Sark made me feel something. Hell I'd rather have sex with Alice than go through this torture. When it's over he doesn't even bother to stay he merely puts his clothes on and mutters something about work…Alice no doubt. As the door closes I let myself relax a little. I hug my pillow closer and try to think about something happy. I think about dad a little bit and I think about my childhood. But all roads seem to lead to the same place, and eventually Vaughn is back plaguing my thoughts.
It's times like these that unexpected things just seem to happen. There aren't any reasons why they should but they do anyway. And so as it was with myself still lying in my bed and deliberating whether I should go downstairs to get some of the high priced liquor that I had tucked away at the back of my cupboards. Just as I had made up my mind to get the liquor I heard a small crash downstairs. After being abducted once from my home in my near past I was immediately alert. I silently picked myself off of the bed and walked to my door. I pressed my right ear against the cool wood and listened. At first silence, then I began to hear footsteps they got louder as they wandered closer to my door. Then a knock. I sighed half in relief and half in anger 'Vaughn.' I thought to myself. I pushed back from the door and began twisting the handle open.
"What is it now Vau…" I stopped. Not Vaughn…Sark. I was slowly beginning to accept the fact that Sark just randomly showed up in my life at odd intervals.
"It's nice to see you again Sydney." He sounded almost…chipper and as always a faint touch of his smirk was looming in his smile.
"So…what brings you to this side of the world at this ungodly hour? Trying to stalk me to death?" I probably sounded more annoyed than I should have been but honestly it was almost midnight and it had only been about a day since I last saw him.
"I have a proposition for you." His smirk become more predominant and he was obviously relishing in whatever he knew that I didn't.
"Yes…and what is this proposition…and could you please hurry and get on with it because I'm really tire… oh and before you do go if you wouldn't mind bringing up the good bottle of vodka, it should be in the second cupboard on the …" he cut me off.
"Come with me to Ireland." The smirk was gone and had been replaced by a small but hopeful smile.
"What…?" I asked still a little dazed from sleep deprivation.
"I'm going to quit working for Sloane…I'm leaving for Ireland and I want you to come with me."
"Why?"
"Why not? It would be a chance for a normal life…It's a big step to be sure but if we both take it tog…"
"But my father…" I interrupted
"Sydney you know better than I do that the thing your father wants most is for you to be out of this life. There's nothing left here Sydney." When he finished he just looked at me and waited for my answer. When I didn't say anything he started to speak again. "I'll understand if you need…"
"Yes." I replied. He looked at me in disbelief almost as if he had expected me to say no.
"Your absolutely sure…" He began
"Yes." I smiled. I began to pack. I packed my clothes, my pictures, my books, and my memories, despite my better judgement I left the alcohol behind. The very last thing I did before I left this house and this life behind was I sat down and I wrote a letter.
Dear Dad,
Throughout my entire life you've been strong for me. The time has come that not only do we need to be strong for one another but ourselves as well. It wasn't that long ago that I thought I barely knew you, but I know now that I've known you all along. I trust no one in this world as much as you and I love you with all my heart. And it is because of this that have to leave this life at the CIA behind and begin again. I will write to you as often as I can and it is my only hope that you will understand these actions.
Love,
Sydney
A/N: FINISHED! I just have to say that I am so so incredibly sorry for not updating in so long. I've had a lot of work that's been going on and I had the most horrible awful disgustingly bad writers block. But i thank you all for sticking with me to the end. So please review because I am very eager for feedback on the story now that i finished it.