I'm really sorry that its taken me so long to update. Computer trouble is my only excuse. That and university. And glandular fever. Anyway, I'm finally uploading chapter 5 so enjoy.
She rolled over onto her side, her hair falling across her face. She tucked it behind her ear as she stared at the clock on the bedside table. One of the hands ticked its way around the face, crossing numbers and the two remaining hands. She could faintly hear it through the early morning gloom. She was still tired. It was amazing that she could sleep for hours and hours and yet, nowadays she never seemed to stop being tired. It was like this permanent state of exhaustion had consumed her and bar putting herself into a coma she couldn't think of a single way to shake the feeling. She slid her feet out from underneath the covers and placed them onto the floor, only to draw them back up again. The floor was freezing against her warm skin and she wrinkled her brow at the sudden change in climate. She placed her feet on the floor again, soaking in the cold, acclimatising herself to her new atmosphere.
It was six o'clock, a time she would normally never have considered getting up at. But, what with everything else that was going on she had found it difficult to drift off, even in his arms. Normally she could sleep without a problem, it was the getting up part that was slightly trickier. But her sleep pattern had been thrown off by recent events. She stood up and picked up a hooded sweater from the chair in the corner of the room. She wrapped it around her shoulders and walked silently through the door, trying not to disturb the still sleeping man.
She walked through the corridors of the apartment. It was deceptively large and she would definitely have lived there if she could have chosen to have a normal life. But she was stuck in the one she had, not that the fact bothered her.
She made her way into the lounge and walked past the bag that Brennan had dropped there the night before. As she looked towards the open French windows she took in the fact that he wasn't asleep on the couch. She smiled, knowing exactly where he would be at that moment in time. It would obviously muddy the waters surrounding the case but the happiness of her friends mattered slightly more than that. She walked towards the windows, feeling the early morning air. She pulled the sweater tighter around her, trying to shut the cold out, regretting that she hadn't thought to put any socks on.
She saw the blonde woman. She was leaning against the beam which went around the balcony, coffee mug in hand, head turned away from Lexa, towards the Hudson view. The sun hadn't yet risen and the sky still held that sense of mystery over what kind of day it was holding. Lexa wasn't an early riser, never had been but she loved the dawn. It was the kind of thing she imagined fitting with a night out, going from club to club, dancing and drinking and laughing. In her younger, less responsible days she would have done just that, spent her nights away from home. When she got back it would be five, maybe five-thirty and she would sit watching the sun rise through the sky. It was peaceful, with a whole day still to come, and she loved that feeling.
'Hey,' she said quietly, reluctant to break the silence.
'Hi,' Shalimar replied. She had been aware of Lexa's presence for a while, but had been enjoying the dawn all to herself.
Lexa walked out onto the balcony, once again regretting the lack of anything to cover her feet. She looked down at Shalimar's and saw for the first time that she was dressed. She was wearing boots, jeans and a strappy top.
'Please tell me you haven't been out already,' she said.
'Feral genes. I can't help it.'
Lexa smiled. Shalimar had to put up with a lot from her feral DNA but she always seemed to relish it rather than anything else. The acute sense of smell, something Lexa could have done without was something that didn't seem to bother Shalimar; seeing absolutely everything didn't ever seem to phase her; and the early morning late night routine was a factor that didn't wear on her. Lexa had always, even when they first met been impressed by what Shalimar could do.
'Are you sure its not something else?'
Shalimar turned to look at the brunette. She looked drained and it was only then that she realised what everyone else had been through. Over the past four years Shalimar had had to deal with having a daughter by herself but she had never even considered how much crap Jesse and Lexa had gone through. They had handled the Dominion for four whole years without any help from the rest of the Mutant X team and it had been Shalimar's fault that the team had fallen apart anyway.
'I'm worried about her,' Shalimar replied, answering Lexa's question after a lengthy pause.
Lexa opened her mouth to speak but stopped. She wanted to ask the question more than anything else, she needed to know the answer but she was aware of Shalimar's fragile state. She wasn't entirely sure if the feral could confront what Lexa was forcing her to at that moment.
'Who's the father?' She noticed Shalimar fidget slightly with the rim of the coffee cup, running her finger along the edge. 'The only reason I'm asking is that when the Dominion agents came last night to take Taylor away she fought back. She used her feral abilities to struggle a bit but then she electrocuted one of them. Now, last night when we got back here I convinced myself that it was the concussion filling in the blanks for me but now I'm not so sure. So I guess what I'm really asking you is how probable it is that in the few months since you left Mutant X and Sanctuary that you found another electrical elemental and slept with him.' Lexa finished in a rush, slightly gasping for breath. She hadn't meant for it all to come out like that, she had wanted to ease Shalimar into the question but Lexa had never been one to dodge an issue, she was always straight up about her intentions and her thoughts.
Shalimar closed her eyes. She felt the sun burst over the edge of the world in a haze of colour and light and heat. She could see the brightness through her eyelids and she focused on it until bright spots of multicolour appeared in front of her eyes. She opened them and looked around, squinting slightly in the new atmosphere.
'In answer to your actual question, Brennan's the father of Taylor. I know you knew that already so I'll continue straight onto the reason why I didn't tell any of you let alone him. I was terrified. Taylor was, for lack of a better, less crude phrase, an accident. It wasn't like we had planned to have a baby. Me and Brennan were in love but that didn't automatically make us parent material.'
'Then why leave and not be parent material without his support?'
'Because I knew that when faced with being a mother or letting Taylor fend for herself that I would have to do the former. I'm feral, I knew that the maternal thing would kick in whether or not I wanted it to. And I also knew that Brennan would love Taylor with all his heart, but I couldn't be sure that he would love her for her. I didn't want him to feel obligated.'
Lexa stared at Shalimar as she breathed deeply. She had no idea what Shalimar had been going through over the past few years and she had a feeling that she wouldn't have been able to handle it all were she in the same position. Her reasons may have seemed a little weak and patchy four years later but Lexa had every confidence in a lack of perspective driving people to do certain things. She had been motivated by an instantaneous reaction many times and she could not only sympathise with Shalimar, she could empathise.
'So, are you going to tell him?' Lexa asked.
That was the stumper, it was the one question Shalimar couldn't possibly have answered. She knew that there were benefits to telling him, the main one being that he deserved to know. But she couldn't face it, not after everything that had happened. She already knew that she would tell him, it wasn't like she could ever keep the important stuff from him but she was willing to delay that moment until it became inevitable.
'Will you let me do it in my own time?' she asked, turning away from the view and leaning her back against the beam.
'Yeah,' Lexa replied. She was going to give Shalimar all the time she needed. She had to admit that she often chose to become involved in other people's issues but she knew when to back off. This was one issue she couldn't intrude on.
They both stood on the balcony, waiting for the rest of the world to wake up. It gradually did, people getting out of bed, getting into their cars, driving off to their regular jobs. And Lexa and Shalimar stood there, waiting for the only two important men in their lives to wake up.
'Where are we going?' Brennan asked as he stepped into the elevator behind Shaliamr, in front of Jesse and Lexa.
'The New York CIA headquarters. They have resources that Mutant X could only dream of so we're gonna hit them up for all they know about the kidnapping,' Lexa replied. She had woken up sufficiently enough to act businesslike even if the veneer was wearing somewhat thin.
Jesse watched her, his eyes observant as always. She assumed that he didn't see everything about her but she was wrong. He saw the different moods she went through. She constantly put up a facade which made her seem so very black and white; but Jesse knew she was so much more than that, she was seen in technicolour only by him. And right at that moment he could tell that she was tired, not just physically but drained of her spirit that had been so effervescent to him before. It was still there but after seeing everything that Shalimar was going through she was drained of the passion that used to define who she was. He hated to see her like that but he was helpless to do anything about it.
As they reached the underground car park Jesse held Lexa back, handing Brennan the car keys with the other hand. He had to make sure that she was okay, had to make sure that she was going to be okay for the rest of the day until it was over and she could sleep again.
'You holding up alright?' he asked, trying, not very successfully to not sound patronising.
She smiled, happy that he cared enough to ask.
'I'm fine, just a little worn out.'
She rolled her eyes as he continued to study her. She knew he didn't believe her but she couldn't think of anything else to say that would convince him that she wasn't doing as badly as she looked. She made to walk away but he held her back again, pulling her into a hug, that she hadn't realised she desperately needed. She felt his body against hers, his heartbeat against her temple as she rested her head on his chest, she felt his arms wrapped around her back. She let her strength wash away from her as she gave herself up to him. All the emotions she had managed to keep in check for the past few hours finally succeeded in overwhelming her and she scrunched her eyes up, feeling warm tears spill onto her cheeks. Her body stayed perfectly still but he knew and she loved that he did. He always knew. And she always loved it.
Shalimar leant against the car, watching the scene between Lexa and Jesse play itself out. She smiled as she saw them. She didn't know quite how she had never realised how perfect they were for each other. Jesse was the only person Lexa would ever truly open up to. It was ironic, she had been the one who had never trusted anyone and she now took the greatest pleasure in a man who trusted everyone.
Shalimar ran her hand through her hair. She couldn't seem to stop thinking about the previous night. Sleeping with Brennan had never been part of the plan. She hadn't wanted to bring up those kinds of emotions all over again, especially not at a time when she needed to stay focused. But the weather seemed to have unleashed her vulnerable side and she had needed to find some sort of comfort in someone else. She hadn't said anything specific to him since he woke up but she had a feeling that that conversation was going to happen now that they were alone.
She heard him unlock the car and climb into the drivers seat and she followed suit, wanting to leave Jesse and Lexa to their own private moment. She leaned back against the leather seat and stared out aimlessly at the concrete wall in front of her. She could just about see her reflection in the windscreen. She was pale and the bags under her eyes showed up like the lights of Las Vegas.
'Shal?' Brennan asked, quietly, hesitantly. He wasn't entirely sure how to start a conversation with her other than 'So, we slept together last night?' Their relationship was difficult and convoluted enough without them having sex. Not that he regretted it at all. It had been incredible. It wasn't like he had been celibate for four years but sleeping with Shalimar had been amazing. He had missed her in so many ways, not all of them completely innocent. But it had unleashed all kinds of emotions that hadn't surfaced in quite some time. And he wasn't sure how he could verbalise them.
'Yeah,' she replied, not turning towards him. It had been a while. Having a daughter hardly aided her sex life and she had been somewhat thrown back into the deep end with Brennan.
'We should probably talk about last night,' Brennan replied. He was still unsure if this was really the right moment. It seemed wrong somehow to be talking about their relationship or lack of one in a car in an underground car park with Jesse and Lexa just a few feet away. It wasn't serious enough somehow.
'Yeah,' she mumbled.
'Shal,' he said, sounding more sure of himself as he reached out and grabbed hold of her hand.
She turned around and looked straight into his eyes. Neither of them blinked and time stood still. The setting didn't matter, the noises and smells around them ceased to matter and they were lost in each other.
Eventually Shalimar blinked and looked back into his eyes.
'I don't regret it,' she said.
Brennan breathed out slowly and quietly in relief. He had been so worried that she would hate him for taking advantage of her. He felt almost guilty about it all, like he had been the one who had pushed her into something she didn't want to do. She had been vulnerable.
'And I chose to sleep with you so please don't think you've hurt me in some way,' she continued, almost as if she had read his mind. The corners of his mouth lifted and he raised his eyebrows.
'You always could read me,' he said, his head cocked to one side.
'Its not that difficult Brennan,' she replied, undertones of condescension showing through.
'Hey,' he replied, faking indignance.
She smiled, the first genuine one he had seen in some time. Her head dropped and she looked at the floor of the car. He reached out his hand and, placing his fingers under her chin lifted her head so that she was looking into his eyes again. He leaned forward slowly, his breathing became imperceptibly quicker and he could feel his heart rate fasten. Within seconds it was racing inside his chest.
Shalimar closed her eyes as she felt his warm breath brush across her lips. She reached her hand up and placed it on his cheek, feeling the rough stubble under her fingertips. She stroked her hand across the skin, warmth radiating into her skin from his.
She didn't even notice the screeching of the car wheels as the vehicle drove across the car park towards them. The noise didn't even hit her ears. It was only when the bright white headlights flashed across the back windscreen of the car that she turned her head to look towards the source of all the noise and light. Her eyes glowed in the relative gloom of the car and she heard the noise of a window winding down and a series of clicks.
'Get down,' she said, her tone dangerous and low. Brennan stared at her, a frown marring his face. Shalimar looked up at him as she heard the car stop behind them. She grabbed the back of his head and pulled him down as she dropped to the floor in front of her seat.
The bullets ripped through the metal, shattering the glass, tearing the seat lining. The noise was deafening and Shalimar squeezed her eyes shut to try and block out everything. She didn't want to die. There were so many things she had to do, least of all get Taylor back and have an actual conversation with Brennan.
Brennan breathed deeply, trying to control his own heart rate. If it had been racing before now it was speeding away, threatening to burst straight out of his chest and get caught up in the streams of gun fire. There was no way he could form a tesla coil and throw it at the car behind them, he wouldn't have enough time and he would have to be able to see where he was aiming. And getting out of the car would definitely not do him or Shalimar any good. He looked over at her. Her blonde hair covered most of her face as she kept her head down but he could see her eyes. They were shut so tightly he would probably have to pry them open once the whole ordeal was finished. Her hand was still holding onto his hair and the slight twinges of pain as her grasp became tighter kept him grounded in reality.
Suddenly the bullets stopped flying. The sharp bangs of noise stopped and Brennan raised his head slightly. He ducked it down a few seconds later when a huge booming noise replaced the previous sounds as the car behind them exploded. Flames licked around the car and he could feel the heat through his leather jacket. He looked up and watched as colour spread through the black and grey interior of the car. The oranges and yellows and reds spread across the ceiling, silently moving across the material, consuming it all. He looked across at Shalimar who had been watching the fire progress along with him. They stared at each other before reaching behind them in unison and shoving their respective car doors open. They both fell out onto the ground of the parking lot, coughing and choking from the black smoke they had inhaled. Brennan pushed himself up from the ground, looking around him to make sure that none of the guys who had been attempting to shoot them were still around. He assumed, correctly that they had all been incinerated in the blast of their own vehicle but once he had checked that nobody was pointing a gun at him his main concern was getting Shalimar and himself away from their car. He ran around the front of the vehicle and came face to face with her. Her eyes were wide and blood shot from all the smoke and she looked pale in sharp contrast with the dark brown smudges smeared across her cheeks and forehead. He grabbed her by the hand and ran, neatly avoiding the flames and the heat. They both ran the length of the car park, eventually locating Lexa and Jesse who, having caused the explosion had hid behind a land rover to shield themselves. Shalimar and Brennan would have been touched by the expressions of fear and relief on their faces but the sounds of sirens were drawing closer and if they were to have any hope of getting Taylor back and bringing down the Dominion they would have to find another car and the CIA.
Brennan opened the palm of his hand and it filled with sparks, flickering and jumping across his skin. He directed a small arc at the land rover and heard the click of the locks as the car opened. They all pulled open a door and slid onto the seats. Brennan revved the car before the last door was closed and within seconds they were speeding out of the exit as police cars and bomb squads zoomed in through the entrance.